Naruto: Ramen Days
by Rathanel
Summary: After dying at the end of the Sand-Sound Invasion, Naruto finds that his life is governed by a strange set of rules that he is still trying to figure out.  VideoGame!Naruto
1. Life Five: Origins

**A/N: This story will be written in first person from Naruto's perspective. It is (originally) canon!Naruto, though he's had a rather different go of things this time around. I include the warning here so that you don't think it's some sort of SI; I'm just playing around with another style of writing.**

* * *

><p>I blinked.<p>

I stared in silence as Teuchi-jii-san placed another bowl of ramen in front of me. Slowly, carefully, I lifted the bowl and moved it to one side, placing it reverently on the counter far out of the way.

Then I slammed my head down as hard as I could.

"Naruto?" came the shocked gasp from Ayame-nee-chan.

"I fucking died _again_," I growled. "How the hell did I get through that fight with the Snake-bastard the first time?"

"Naruto?" Ayame-nee-chan said again, placing one hesitant hand on my shoulder. "Are you ok?"

I sighed, wiping one hand over my face before turning a smile to Ayame. Even if this was the fifth time I was living out this particular scene, and the third time Ayame-nee-chan had asked that exact same question, I didn't want to do anything to truly upset her. "I'm doing great, thanks Nee-chan."

"What did you mean, you 'died again'?" asked Teuchi-jii-san.

"Just thinking out loud," I said, moving the bowl back in front of me and picking up my chopsticks. "Itadakimasu!"

* * *

><p>Later that night, I returned to my apartment and walked into my kitchen. As always, floating in the air above the counter were three words that apparently only I could see: "Characters," "Inventory," and "Log."<p>

Then I let out a loud whoop as I noticed the rare but always welcome addition to that list: "Level Up."

"Hell yes level up!" I exclaimed.

The world turned gray around me and my view shifted until I was looking at myself from a spot somewhere in front of... myself. Ugh, this whole thing made my head hurt sometimes.

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has achieved Level Five!**

No, _that _made my head hurt, _all_ the time. It was like someone took the words, chiseled them into rock, and shoved the whole thing into my skull. That makes it sound like it was actually painful, though, and it wasn't. It just felt like it _should_ be painful, which is _like _pain, but... ugh, just... nevermind.

**Naruto Uzumaki has five (5) skill points to assign.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select one (1) new ability.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select one (1) new trait.**

I blinked, scratching my chin thoughtfully as I considered the words shoved into my head. "Trait?" I muttered to myself. "That's new."

**Choose one of the following traits:**

**Chakra Battery**

**Fuinjutsu Affinity**

**Genjutsu Affinity**

**Hidden Blade**

**Kami's Luck**

**Ninjutsu Affinity**

**Silver Tongue**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

"Oh come on, you aren't going to explain any of this crap either?" I asked out loud. As always, there was no reply. I _know _some asshole is listening to me, though, and I'm going to use my Shukaku Special on him just as soon as I find the bastard.

"What the hell does Hidden Blade mean? Not like an actual kunai, right?" I asked.

**Naruto Uzumaki has selected Hidden Blade. Is that correct?**

"Argh! No!" Make that two Shukaku Specials.

**Choose one of the following traits:**

**Chakra Battery**

**Fuinjutsu Affinity**

**Genjutsu Affinity**

**Hidden Blade**

**Kami's Luck**

**Ninjutsu Affinity**

**Silver Tongue**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

"Kami, I hate you so much."

**Naruto Uzumaki has selected Kami's Luck. Is that correct?**

My entire body twitched, my hands grasping at imaginary kunai and making rude gestures with them. "Fuck it. Yes," I said out loud. I could definitely use some luck the way things have been going lately. Stupid hickey-giving Snake-bastard and his stupid sword.

**Naruto Uzumaki has five (5) skill points to assign.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select one (1) new ability.**

"Abilities," I stated. It didn't take long to figure out how to get this thing to respond how I wanted it to... even if I did do that unintentionally sometimes.

**Choose one of the following abilities:**

**Dodge (0/5)**

**Link (0/5)**

**Overpower (0/5)**

**Restore (0/5)**

**Unique: Kage Bunshin Barrage (4/5)**

"Ha. Kage Bunshin Barrage, of course." That was definitely my best move – aside from my Kage-killer Sexy Jutsu. That never showed up in any of the lists, though, or I would be boosting the hell out of that instead. "Although I can't tell that it's actually doing anything," I mumbled to myself. I could still use the shadow clones just as well as ever, but it really seemed like "Kage Bunshin Barrage" should be more than what I was doing before.

**Naruto Uzumaki has selected Kage Bunshin Barrage. Is that correct?**

"Yes."

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has unlocked the following abilities: **

**Unique: Army of One (0/5)**

**Unique: One Man Army (0/5)**

"Huh? Aren't those the same thing? And what the hell does the uni- ugh, nevermind."

**Naruto Uzumaki has five (5) skill points to assign.**

**Fuinjutsu: 1**

**Genjutsu: 5  
><strong>

**Ninjutsu: 25**

**Taijutsu: 5  
><strong>

"Ninjutsu. Yes. Ninjutsu. Yes. Ninjutsu. Yes. Ninjutsu. Yes. Ninjutsu. Yes," I droned out. I had to do this every time I got to level up, and it just got more annoying every time. Oddly, genjutsu and taijutsu kept going up even though I never assigned points to them... I guess I was just awesome like that.

**Level Up Complete! You need 5,843 experience points to achieve Level Six.**

**Saving Progress...**

And with that, the world faded back into focus. As always, I felt a warm sensation start in the middle of my stomach and then rush over my body before quickly fading. I grinned, punching my left hand with my fist – I actually _felt _stronger.

Then my enthusiasm faded as quickly as it had come.

"And now I get to go through Kakashi-sensei's stupid ass bell test tomorrow. Again. Yay," I muttered to myself.

* * *

><p>"Naruto!" Sakura yelled, stalking up to me as I entered the clearing two and a half hours after the time Kakashi had designated. "Where have you been?"<p>

"Eating breakfast," I replied casually. "Hey, Sakura-chan," I asked, cutting her off before she could launch into a tirade I'd already heard twice before, "what's the difference between an 'army of one' and a 'one man army'?"

Sakura allowed herself to get distracted, though she still huffed indignantly. "Is that supposed to be a riddle or something? They mean the same thing, idiot."

"That's what I thought, too," I said, ignoring the insult with practiced ease. When Sakura said it, it sounded almost affectionate.

"Hn," Sasuke grunted.

"The bastard speaks!" I exclaimed. I stepped to the side, deftly avoiding the expected punch from Sakura-chan while maintaining my focus on Sasuke. I'd ended up dying first this time around, but the time before that he'd let Sakura-chan get killed by the Snake-bastard – I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to forgive him for that, even if it technically hadn't happened anymore.

I wasn't really being fair, since it was just as much my fault as it was his, I suppose, but then again it was _his_ fault the Snake-bastard even attacked our group in the first place.

"Naruto!" Sakura growled. I noted that she looked vaguely surprised, though it was quickly subsumed in her anger. "Stop insulting Sasuke-kun!"

"Ok, ok, Sakura-chan," I said, waving my hands in surrender. I moved to a tree across the clearing from Sasuke and began practicing another version of the tree-walking exercise. Rather than using my feet to walk up the tree, I stuck my foot to the ground and tried to lift it; as soon as I felt the earth start to give, I tamped it down and switched to the other foot. That closet-pervert Ebisu had explained the concept behind this one, something about "reducing my chakra expenditure" and "resistance training."

All I knew was that I could do this exercise without Sasuke bothering me – he'd been more of a bastard than usual when he found out that I already knew the tree-walking exercise and I didn't want to deal with that right now.

Exactly three hours after he was _supposed _to show up, Kakashi-sensei poofed into the training ground and said, "Yo!"

Two bells, no lunch, sent back to the Academy, blah blah blah. He'd apparently rehearsed his presentation, because it was one of the few things that always happened _exactly _the same way every time.

After Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme had vanished into the forest – and I smirked to myself, because I could totally see where both of them were hiding, which certainly hadn't been true the first time around – I turned to face Kakashi-sensei. Even more than defeating the Snake-bastard, I was determined to get an actual, honest to Kami clean hit against Kakashi-sensei during this bell test. I wasn't about to forget about his Thousand Years of Pain, and I certainly wasn't going to forgive him for using it again... and again... and again.

"The test has started, you know," Kakashi-sensei said, pulling out his perverted book. I knew who had written it, now, but that just made it worse; Closet-pervert and Kakashi-sensei had _nothing _on Ero-sennin.

"Don't think it's gonna be easy, Kakashi-sensei," I proclaimed, pointing at him. "I'm much stronger than I used to be!" I did just add another point to my Kage Bunshin Barrage, so that should be even more effective this time.

He didn't seem all that impressed, and honestly I wasn't either because he seemed to be dodging me just as easily as the first time around. Even when I pulled out my awesome jutsu I hadn't the first time and swarmed him with shadow clones, he just cut through them like a buzzsaw. I felt vaguely ill watching it, actually, as it reminded me far too much of my recent encounter with the Snake-bastard.

Fortunately, Kakashi-sensei didn't decide to separate my head from my shoulders. He did, however, finish off the last of my clones without even bothering to put his book down.

"Just spamming clones isn't going to get you anywhere, Naruto," he chided. "You're just wasting chakra like this."

"Argh!" I yelled, grabbing my head in frustration. "What the hell is it going to take? I just hit level five, my ninjutsu should be even stronger now, and I've got all the points I can in Kage Bunshin Barrage-"

I felt like cold water had been dumped over me for a moment, but the sensation faded as quickly as it had come. My jaw dropped open as I watched a series of clones seemingly pop out of nowhere and launch Kakashi into the air.

"U- Zu- Ma- Ki- Naruto Combo!" they announced as they smashed Kakashi-sensei into the ground.

I stared at his fallen form, my brain slowly processing what had just happened. My mouth opened and closed a few times before I choked out, "I have to _say _it? That's it? It doesn't actually do anything unless I _say_ Kage Bunshin Barrage?"

I felt the same bucket of water sensation again, and a moment later I turned around to see a visibly startled Kakashi-sensei get whipped through the air by a chain of clones holding on to one another's feet. They slammed him into a tree, hard, and then dispersed.

"That's a neat trick," Kakashi-sensei said from behind me. I felt a wave of disappointment wash over me as I saw the Kakashi-sensei who had been slammed into the tree burst into smoke before revealing a slightly broken log. Out of the corner of my eye I could see a log lying in the small crated where the first Kakashi-sensei had landed. "It looks like you've been practicing quite a lot with the kage bunshin jutsu."

I twisted around, trying to catch him with a backhand, but he just leaned out of the way, his eye contorted into a smile the whole time. Despite missing, I was grinning widely. "I'll get you this time! Kage Bunshin Barraarrghg!"

"Konoha Taijutsu Ultimate Art: Thousand Years of Pain," Kakashi-sensei called out from behind me as I arced through the air and landed in the nearby lake with a splash.

Bastard.

* * *

><p>Roughly an hour later, we were all gathered around the training posts in the middle of Training Ground Seven. Sakura was currently tied to the post, as she had been every time we went through this since I died the first time. Somehow Sasuke never ended up tied to the post, which I thought was extremely unfair.<p>

"You all... pass!" Kakashi-sensei exclaimed after finishing his doom and gloom routine.

"Yay," I muttered, not even bothering trying to fake enthusiasm this time; the first time it had all been amazing and exciting, but this was the fifth time through. "Can I untie Sakura-chan now?"

"Of course!" Kakashi-sensei said. "It's good that you're looking out for your teammates, Naruto, Sasuke. Those who can't follow the rules are trash, but those who abandon their teammates are worse than trash." He always managed to work that into his speech somehow, I'd noticed.

"Naruto! Hurry up and untie me!"

"On it, Sakura-chan!" I said, pulling out a kunai and slicing through the ropes. The moment she was free she jumped towards Sasuke-teme, squealing happily.

"Isn't it great that we passed, Sasuke-kun?" she chattered. "We should go get lunch to celebrate!"

"Hn," Sasuke-teme grunted, stalking out of the clearing. He always looked pissed after the bell test for some reason that I still hadn't figured out. He got to be on a team with me and Sakura-chan! What could be more awesome than that?

Sakura-chan looked hurt at being ignored, so I immediately tried to cheer her up. "We definitely should go celebrate," I said. "Our first lunch as official genin of Konoha!" That offer hadn't worked out so well last time though, so I added, "We should invite the other teams too, assuming they passed."

Sakura-chan looked thoughtful for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, we should! I can't wait to see the look on Ino-pig's face now that it's official!"

Since it wasn't going to be just the two of us, I didn't want to go to Ichiraku's; I was saving that for something special, like our first date. "How does Yakiniku Q sound? Everyone likes to eat there, right?"

"Sure!" Sakura-chan said, nodding. She paused then, an odd look passing over her face. Her mouth opened and closed a couple of times before she said, "You aren't nearly as annoying as I thought you'd be. You haven't mentioned that ramen place even once."

"We could go there if you-"

"No! Barbeque is good! I'll go tell Sasuke-kun and then Ino's team, so you go tell the others, alright?" She then ran out of the clearing without waiting for my reply.

I scratched my cheek, feeling a little embarrassed. This was the first time Sakura-chan complimented me like that in... anyway, it felt good to know that all my efforts were paying off.

I turned and headed towards Team Kurenai's usual training ground. It wasn't that far away, and I'd been there a few times in the past- er, future... whatever. I'd been there.

I stopped at the edge of the clearing and watched as Kiba and Shino sparred. I saw Hinata sitting off the to the side, panting slightly, and looking like she had just finished sparring herself.

"Can I help you, Uzumaki-san?" came a voice from behind me.

I spun around, pointing at the team's jounin instructor. "Gah! Don't do that!" I yelled.

The black-haired jounin just raised one delicate eyebrow. "Is there something you needed with my team?"

"Oh, yeah! All of us are getting together for lunch to celebrate becoming genin, and I'm here to invite you guys."

"I see," Kurenai responded coolly. "Well, we were just about to break for lunch, so I suppose we can attend. It would have been nice to receive more notice than this, however."

I rubbed the back of my head sheepishly. "Well, we kinda just passed and decided this, so... yeah."

"Lunch sounds awesome!" Kiba said as he bounced over. "Where are we going?"

"Yakiniku Q," I replied.

"That is acceptable," Shino said stoically. I turned to get Hinata's reply only to find her standing about twenty feet away, ducking her head and pressing the tips of her index fingers together. Hinata could be awesome sometimes – she had the same nindo as me, so how could she not? – but then there were time like this where she just got _weird._

"Hey, Hinata! How does lunch sound?" I called out.

Hinata just swayed slightly before pitching over backwards, her face bright red.

I heard Kurenai let out a quiet sigh while Kiba muttered something under his breath.

"Is she ok?" I asked, concerned. She did that an awful lot.

"Hinata-san will be attending," Shino replied stoically.

"Um... ok?" I said.

* * *

><p>Our group ended up taking three booths once we reached Yakiniku Q: Asuma and Kurenai were in one booth, Team Asuma and Sakura were in another, and I was sitting in a third with Team Kurenai. Sasuke, in a development that didn't surprise me in the least, had chosen not to attend. I wasn't sure if anyone managed to let Kakashi-sensei know about the whole lunch thing, because he wasn't here either.<p>

I was sitting next to Kiba – and Akamaru, can't forget Akamaru – while Shino sat across from me and Hinata sat next to him. I would _swear _that she kept looking at me, but every time I looked directly at her she was staring at her plate, her face bright red.

I could hear Sakura-chan and Ino getting into another argument already, but it sounded like just another variation on who Sasuke-teme liked more.

"Hey," I said suddenly, "what do you think the difference between an 'army of one' and a 'one man army' is?"

"What kinda question is that?" Kiba asked. Akamaru barked, and I'd spent enough time around the pair to interpret that as an agreeing bark.

Shino stoically adjusted his sunglasses slightly before responding, "My first thought is that they mean essentially the same thing. Is this a riddle, or perhaps a saying I am not familiar with?"

"Nah, nothin' like that," I said, disappointed.

"Um," came a quiet voice, "s-since they are c-contrasted like that, m-maybe 'army of one' means a single p-person who is as strong as an army, w-while the other i-is an a-army made of a s-single person?"

"Oh," Kiba said suddenly, "you mean like someone who made a lot of clones or something, right?"

I just stared at Hinata for a long moment before grinning widely. "That makes a lot of sense, Hinata-chan! You're awesome! Even Sakura-chan didn't figure that out!"

I felt a jolt of concern as Hinata swayed in her seat, but Shino's hand shot out and grasped her shoulder stoically, steadying her. "Are you alright? That's the second time you almost fainted...," I said.

"Awe-awesome," Hinata squeaked, ducking her head and pressing her fingers together.

"She will be fine, Uzumaki-san," Shino said stoically, cautiously removing his hand from her shoulder. "She is perfectly healthy."

"Alright," I said slowly, settling back into my seat. I rubbed my chin thoughtfully, pondering what Hinata had said. "I get 'One Man Army' then, but what would 'Army of One' do...?"

"What are you talking about?" Kiba asked, a confused look on his face.

"Oh, sorry," I said. "Just thinking out loud."

* * *

><p>"Naruto!" Sakura-chan screamed, looking horrified. "How could you do that to that poor cat?"<p>

"Poor cat? _Poor cat?_" I pointed to the small crater that had formed nearby, and the feline that was wobbling drunkenly out of it while mewling piteously. I had just used Kage Bunshin Barrage on Tora to cut down on the risk this mission carried considerably, but Sakura-chan didn't seem to understand that.

Yep, even as I watched she rushed over and picked up the monstrous thing, cooing gently to it as she did so. Damn, but she looked so cute doing that. No! Focus!

"That _poor cat _is a menace to society!" I exclaimed. "It tried to claw my eyes out! Twice!"

"Quit lying, Naruto!" Sakura-chan said. "It didn't even touch you before you slammed it into the ground!"

Oh, right. That hadn't actually happened this time around.

"Heheheh...," I said, blushing and rubbing the back of my head. "Sorry?"

Sakura just sniffed and stalked past me cradling the cat in her arms. Sasuke followed along behind her, his hands stuffed in his pockets and brooding silently. I stiffened when I felt a hand drop onto my shoulder.

"Naruto...," Kakashi said slowly. I turned to look at him, expecting him to be just as upset as Sakura. He stared at me several seconds, then his eye crinkled into a smile. "Good job!" he said, giving me a thumbs up.

"Huh?"

"Once we get back, we'll have beaten Gai's record by a good twenty minutes. And I agree, that cat is an absolute menace."

I relaxed and smiled back, grinning widely. "No problem, Kakashi-sensei!"

* * *

><p>I wandered into my kitchen, reflexively checking to see if the words "Level Up" had appeared yet, but no such luck. Feeling bored, I decided to see if any of the other options had changed.<p>

"Inventory," I said as I shoved a cup of ramen into the microwave. It sucked that there wasn't a "cook ramen faster" ability; that would actually be useful all the time.

**Naruto Uzumaki**

"Oh, come on!" I yelled. "Naruto Uzumaki," I said through gritted teeth.

**Naruto Uzumaki currently has: **

**Ryo: 132**

**Black Shirt**

**Cup Ramen x37**

**Kunai Pouch x2**

**Orange Jacket**

**Orange Pants**

**Key Item: Konoha Headband**

"Hmm... I'm running low on ramen again," I mused. Still, other than letting me know that, there was nothing new there. "Log," I said next.

**Active Mission: None**

**Active Mission Details: N/A**

**Arc: Team Seven**

**You have completed: **

**D-ranks: 7**

**C-ranks: 0**

**B-ranks: 0**

**A-ranks: 0**

**S-ranks: 0**

**Special Events: 1**

I jumped at that last one. "Special events? What the hell?" I waited for it to explain, but no new words got shoved into my head.

"Screw you," I mumbled. I pulled my ramen out of the microwave and added another mechanically as I pondered what that "special" mission could be. Obviously none of the stuff I had done in a previous life counted or I would have a lot more D-ranks, not to mention that A-rank mission to Wave.

That had been zero the first time I checked the log, which was... uh, once? The very first time I saw it? Crap. What the hell did I do between the night before the bell test and now that counted as a special event?

"Characters," I muttered around a mouthful of ramen.

**Naruto Uzumaki**

"You are such an ass," I growled. "Naruto Uzumaki."

**Naruto Uzumaki – Genin**

**Level: 5**

**Rank: D**

**Experience Points: 542/6,000**

**Teacher: Kakashi Hatake**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 7**

**Precision: 3**

**Toughness: 4**

**Vitality: 10 (15)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1**

**Genjutsu: 5**

**Ninjutsu: 30**

**Taijutsu: 5**

**Abilities: **

**Kage Bunshin Barrage (*)**

**Traits:**

**Kami's Luck**

**Jinchuuriki**

**Will of Fire**

**Will of Fire**

"Hmm... I would have sworn that those statistics were different the first time I looked," I muttered to myself, struggling to remember what they had been. I'm sure that vitality was eight and twelve before, because it stood out so much. And the other numbers had been two, four, and six? Maybe? And I still don't understand why Will of Fire shows up twice.

"Gah, I should have been checking that more often."

* * *

><p>"Naruto?" Sakura-chan asked. "How are you doing that?"<p>

I had been so focused on the water-walking exercise that I had not noticed her approach at all. Startled, I lost concentration and fell into the lake I had been standing on top of with a loud splash. When I pulled myself out of the water a moment later, I noticed that Sakura-chan was staring at me curiously.

"It's a chakra control exercise," I explained, grinning proudly. I finally got to show off some of my skills! Even better, Sasuke-teme wasn't around to complain about me knowing stuff that he didn't. "You have to change how much chakra you push from your feet based on the changes in the water, and then you float!"

"When did you learn how to do that?" she asked again, an odd expression on her face.

_'During the break between the second and third part of the Chuunin Exams' _obviously wasn't going to work, even if it was the truth.

"Iruka-sensei showed me how," I said instead. That much at least was partially true - he had given me some pointers when I approached him... two deaths ago? Three? At some point, anyway.

"Oh...," Sakura said slowly, a contemplative look on her face. "Do... do you think you could show me how?"

"Absolutely, Sakura-chan!" I said. Ha! Take that, bastard! Then my face fell. "Um, there's another exercise you have to do first, though," I admitted, scratching my head sheepishly.

"What is it?" she asked suspiciously. "I swear to Kami if you say eating ramen..."

"What? No! Nothing like that," I said, waving my hands in the air. That's not a bad idea, actually, but I guess she'd never go for that. "You have to climb a tree first."

Sakura-chan's face looked kind of scary, and she was raising one fist in the air menacingly, so I hurried to explain. "No, seriously. Here, watch." I rushed over to the nearest tree and quickly ran up the side, pausing when I was standing horizontally roughly a dozen feet off the ground. I took a moment to note how much easier this was now, grinning all the while. This whole traveling back in time thing was actually kinda awesome; I was getting way stronger, Kakashi-sensei kept complimenting me about how hard I was practicing, and Sakura-chan was paying more attention to me! Sasuke-teme looked pissed as usual, but I'd take Sakura-chan over him any day.

I turned to face Sakura-chan, noting the stunned look on her face. It quickly settled into a mask of determination, though, and she marched up to the tree.

"What you have to do is push chakra out of your... feet...," I trailed off, watching as Sakura-chan took two hesitant steps before walking up the tree like she'd been doing this for years.

"This is pretty easy!" she said, grinning brightly at me.

My stomach did a little flip-flop and I almost lost my grip on the tree, but I recovered and turned away, hiding my blush. She'd been the first one to pick it up back in Wave too, but Sasuke-teme had been there to hog all the attention. This was way more awesome.

"It was much harder for me," I said, turning back to Sakura, "I guess you're just that awesome!"

Sakura-chan turned abruptly and marched back down the tree, moving as easily as if she were on the ground. "So next is the water-walking, right?" she said, not turning her head.

"Yep!" I said as I followed after her. I almost expected her to just keep walking out onto the water, but her feet splashed into the edge of the lake and she stumbled to a halt.

"Hmm...," she said to herself. She stood there a minute, just pushing one foot into the water over and over, before she placed it on top of the water firmly and lifted her other foot out. She dropped back in a moment later, but she had that bright, glowing smile that did funny things to my stomach again. "I think I'm getting the hang of this!" she said, before turning her attention back to the water.

"Awesome, Sakura-chan!" I said. I moved about fifty feet away so I wouldn't disturb her, then stepped back onto the water to resume my practice. Ten minutes passed like that, both of us focused on training and not saying anything, but it was pleasant in a way our team training sessions had never been. Finally, I noticed her stepping out of the water panting and slowly make her way over to me.

"How long have you been doing that?" she asked, sounding slightly out of breath.

"Uh..., since lunch, I guess?" I replied. I hadn't really noticed the time passing, come to think of it. Now that I was thinking about the time, I noticed that the sun was starting to set; I must have been doing this for five or six hours now. Time to call it a day, I suppose.

I turned back to Sakura-chan, who was staring at me with her mouth hanging open.

"What?" I asked. I turned to look behind me, but didn't notice anything out of the ordinary.

Sakura-chan's jaw snapped shut with an audible click, and she shook herself. "Nothing," she replied, her voice sounding slightly strained.

"You ok, Sakura-chan?" I asked.

"Fine! Perfectly fine!" she said. She turned and began to walk out of the clearing, though she did yell "I'll see you tomorrow!" over her shoulder. I thought I heard her mutter something about something being impossible under her breath, but I wasn't sure.

* * *

><p>"I can't believe the Hokage actually gave in like that," Sakura-chan complained. "You've been doing that every single day we get a mission, and he always turned you down before."<p>

"Hn."

"Don't worry Sakura-chan," I said, "it just took the old man a little while to recognize our awesomeness." I still didn't understand why it always took the Hokage so long to give us this mission... or why it was _always_ Tazuna-jii-san's mission, come to think of it, but I knew complaining worked the first time so I just kept it up until it worked again. Problem solved!

Sakura-chan made her really cute annoyed sound and stomped ahead, muttering under her breath. I pulled my attention away from her, however, when I noticed the puddle she had just walked by. It was _that _puddle.

I eyed the water warily as we approached. The bastards hiding inside it were nothing compared to what we would be fighting in the future, but they were still the very first enemy ninja I had ever faced, if you didn't count Mizuki-teme. They would also be a useful way to measure just how much I had grown since the last time.

I walked past, doing my best not to stare at the puddle, and waited for them to emerge. The moment they came out of the water and began to attack Kakashi-sensei, I acted.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage! Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I shouted. I watched in satisfaction as one of the missing-nin – I could never remember their names, and they wore masks anyway – was launched into the air with a Naruto Uzumaki Combo while the other was buried under a horde of clones. I struck a heroic pose and turned to Sakura-chan, smiling widely.

"Ha! You have nothing to fear while Naruto is here!" Hey, that even rhymed! Double-awesome.

"You'll pay for that, you little shit," one of the missing-nin muttered as he picked himself up off of the ground.

"You want some more, huh?" I said, laughing. I pointed imperiously at them, but before I could say anything Sasuke-teme darted past me and kicked one of them in the face before using the guy's head as a springboard and back-flipping onto the other one, crushing him to the ground.

"Go Sasuke-kun!" Sakura-chan cheered.

"Hn," Sasuke-teme grunted, looking smug.

"Bah. He couldn't have done that if I hadn't softened them up first," I muttered.

"Good job, team," Kakashi-sensei said as he tied up the enemy ninja. "Although, Naruto...," he said slowly, "you might want to consider learning some other techniques. That move isn't going to work on everyone, and the more you use it the more likely an enemy will be prepared for it."

"Yeah, Naruto," Sakura-chan said, nodding sagely, "you can't just use the same move all the time. I bet Sasuke-kun knows lots of moves!"

I would have sworn I just heard Kakashi sigh to himself, but when I looked over suspiciously he was still busy tying up the ninja.

A moment later he turned to Tazuna-jiji and started grilling him about why ninja were here. I could have told them all of this – I even tried, the first time – but they never believed me. I wouldn't have either if I wasn't living it, though, so I didn't hold it against them.

Besides, this time I was going to make damn sure Haku didn't die again. Believe it!

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Here it is, edited, revised, and moved into its own story!**

**I'll also be posting a rough draft of the "game manual" as the second chapter. The idea is that the help text in the story (when he gets there) will be lifted straight out of the manual. It will be expanded and revised as needed. Feedback and suggestions are always welcome.**

**As for the update pace, I'll commit to a minimum of one chapter (5k+ words) a month. The Empty Cage is going to remain my primary story and I'll also be moving Swapping The Cage into its own story as well. I like working on the very different types of stories I have going, as it helps keeps things fresh, but I also don't want to burn out or set expectations that I'll be updating much more often than I actually will. **


	2. Life Five: Elementary

"Naruto," Sakura-chan whispered, "stop moving! You're rocking the boat."

"Sorry, Sakura-chan," I whispered back. I settled down into my seat on the boat that was carrying us across the sea to the island of Wave. I was filled with nervous energy, though, and my hands and legs kept shifting around.

Very soon now we would be encountering Zabuza for the first time, and I would finally get a chance to see what I could do against an opponent of his caliber. The very first battle with him was still burned into my mind, from the moment his sword impacted against the tree trunk and he appeared to the climactic clash between him and Kakashi-sensei. The specifics of the battle changed, a great deal in one case, but it always started like that and always ended with Haku transporting Zabuza away.

Not this time! This time I was ready with my super-awesome Kage Bunshin Barrage, and I was going to stop Haku right then and there. If we didn't have to do that fight on the bridge and that midget bastard Gato didn't interfere, I could save Haku this time!

Before I knew it, we had completed the trip and were getting out of the boat. Our guide wished us luck and then hurried on his way, looking relieved to be leaving. My tension just kept getting higher and higher as we walked through the woods, and eventually I was visibly shaking and jumping at every sound, wondering if that was finally Zabuza showing up.

"Naruto, you don't need to be so nervous," Kakashi-sensei said quietly. "You guys are doing well as a team, and I'm here to protect you if anything goes wrong."

"I'm not nervous, Kakashi-sensei," I replied, scoffing. "I'm excited! I just know something awesome is going to happen soon."

"Stop trying to act cool, Naruto," Sakura-chan said, rolling her eyes. "The only awesome thing that's going to happen is finally getting to sleep inside."

I heard a small rustle in the bush nearby, and flung my kunai at it instinctively. A moment later a white rabbit scampered out, looking terrified. That was it! That was what happened just before-

"Everyone, get down!" Kakashi-sensei yelled as I registered a heavy whooshing sound. I dove to the ground, noting that Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme were doing so as well and that Kakashi-sensei had pulled Tazuna-jiji down with him. Zabuza's sword slammed into the side of a tree a moment later with a loud thunk, and then Zabuza himself appeared, standing on top of the sword with his back to us and looking totally badass.

"Well well, if it isn't the Hidden Mist's missing-nin Zabuza Momochi-kun," Kakashi-sensei said, just like he always did. This was another one of those weird things that always happened the same way.

"Everybody get back," he continued, "this one's on a whole other level. It will be a little tough... unless I do this." Kakashi-sensei then raised his hand and adjusted his headband, revealing his sharingan for the first time... this life, anyway.

"You appear to be Sharingan Kakashi," Zabuza said, looking over his shoulder. "Sorry, but... the old man is mine."

"Surround and protect Tazuna-san. Do not enter the fight. That is the teamwork here," Kakashi-sensei said.

He said that every time too, despite the fact that we had to save his butt every time. Kakashi-sensei and Zabuza kept on talking, chatting back and forth about the sharingan this, sharingan that. I didn't see what was so great about it, honestly. It didn't keep Sasuke-teme from getting his ass kicked in the Chuunin Exams, and Kakashi-sensei still had trouble against Zabuza even when he was using it the whole time. Meh, whatever.

Ah, Zabuza finally jumped onto the water and used his Hidden Mist technique. Finally, the fight was starting!

Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme and I were all gathered around Tazuna-jiji, watching for any sign of movement in the thick mist.

"Liver, lungs, spine, jugular, carotid, brain, kidneys, heart... which one should I go after?" came Zabuza's disembodied voice from the mist. It was kinda freaky the first time – and was still a little bit freaky – but repetition had dulled the fear. Sasuke-teme was still as freaked out as ever, though, and Kakashi-sensei had to calm him down just like he always did. Sakura-chan handled it much better, but she was awesome like that.

Then Zabuza appeared in the middle of our group again and he and Kakashi-sensei started fighting for real. As always, Kakashi-sensei ended up in the water trapped in that bubble prison thing and Zabuza made some water clones to attack us. Normally I had to work with Sasuke-teme at this point, but not this time!

"Only when you are listed in my Bingo Book, can you start calling yourselves ninjas... you are not ninjas!" Zabuza's water clone called out mockingly.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I snapped. He said that every time, but it still pissed me off to be insulted like that.

My clones swarmed over the water clone, kicking and punching with abandon. The Zabu-clone whipped its sword around and took out a good chunk of them, but one landed a solid hit with a kunai and the Zabu-clone collapsed into water again.

"Ha! Take that, No-Brows!" I yelled.

"Oh? It looks like you've taught your brats a thing or two, Kakashi," Zabuza said.

"You ain't seen nothing yet! Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I called out again.

More clones popped into existence, beginning a familiar battle cry. "U- Zu-" they started as they kicked Zabuza, but that was as far as they got.

Zabuza's sword whipped through the air, moving far faster than seemed possible for what was essentially a sharpened slab of metal, and took out each clone in turn. The first kick had landed, but Zabuza had barely even shifted and didn't act like he even felt it.

Dammit, at this rate he was going to destroy them all!

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I called again, desperately. I'd never actually tried to use the ability twice against the same person before though, and I wasn't sure what would happen.

At first, I thought _nothing _happened, as I didn't see any of the clones appearing, but then as Zabuza destroyed the last visible clone the water underneath his feet erupted and my clones poured out, each latching onto him with all their strength.

His sword kept whipping around and taking out my clones left and right, but his footing on the water was destroyed and he lost control of his bubble thing, freeing Kakashi-sensei.

"Fuck yeah!" I yelled as Kakashi-sensei landed on the water and began his water dragon duel thingy. I didn't have to rely on Sasuke-teme at all this time! I was definitely getting stronger! "Did you see that, Sakura-chan?" I asked, turning towards my teammate. Her eyes were fixed on the show Kakashi-sensei was putting on, though. I was kinda disappointed, but the whole making a dragon out of water thing was more awesome... I guess.

I shook that off, though, because Haku would be showing up at any second and I needed to be ready.

Two needles flew out of nowhere and nailed Zabuza in the neck. He collapsed bonelessly to the ground a moment later, and then Haku was there. Kakashi-sensei was next to Zabuza's body, checking his pulse. It still seemed kinda odd that he didn't figure out the ruse immediately, but whatever. Kakashi-sensei went through his bit about hunter-nin and all that, and then Haku used a shunshin to move next to Zabuza's "corpse." I had to act now, before Haku disappeared.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I yelled, pointing at Haku.

…

Nothing happened.

"Naruto!" Sakura-chan hissed, punching me to the ground. "Don't attack ninja from another village!"

"What the hell?" I cried as I leapt back to my feet. "Kage Bunshin Barrage! Kage Bunshin Barrage!" Nothing.

"Naruto!" Kakashi-sensei barked angrily. "Stand down!"

"But he's not a real hunter-nin!" I exclaimed. "Real hunter-nin do the head-chopping thing! You told us that!"

Kakashi's eyes widened and he whipped around, but Haku had already disappeared with Zabuza.

Dammit.

* * *

><p>Shortly after that, Kakashi-sensei passed out from using his sharingan too much and I ended up carrying him all the way to Tazuna's house. I didn't want to make Sakura-chan do it, Tazuna-jiji was too old, and Sasuke-teme was too broody, so it was Kage Bunshin to the rescue!<p>

We got introduced to Tsunami-nee-chan and Inari. Tsunami-nee-chan was still as nice as ever, but Inari was stuck in his Sasuke-wannabe mode. I'd tried to snap him out of it early before, but it never seemed to work until that fight on the bridge. Ah well, I knew he'd turn out awesome so I could handle it for a little while.

The next day dawned bright and clear, and Kakashi-sensei finally woke up.

"First off," he said, "good job on noticing that it was a fake hunter-nin, Naruto! Even I overlooked that one."

I blushed and rubbed the back of my head, embarrassed.

"Now, the bad news is that means Zabuza isn't dead, and he'll be back with his friend. I'd estimate we've got a week before he is fully recovered, and we're going to spend that time preparing as much as possible."

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei?"

"Yes, Naruto?"

"Do we have to wait a week? Couldn't we go find them now?"

"Hmm...," Kakashi-sensei said, rubbing his chin. "Well, let's think about that. Sakura, what do we know about the enemy forces?"

Sakura-chan looked startled at first, but she quickly adopted her thoughtful look. "Well, we know that there were at least four of them – those two guys we fought on the road, Zabuza, and the fake hunter-nin. We took out the first two, Zabuza is out for a week, but the hunter-nin is completely fine."

"Good so far. Sasuke, what else?"

"Hn," Sasuke-teme grunted. "The hunter-nin probably spent the whole fight watching us and knows at least some of what we can do. They also have Gato's resources backing them, so we could expect a large number of hired bandits and thugs, possibly even additional ninja."

"Also good. Naruto, what do we have on our side?"

"Three awesome ninja and a bastard?"

"Hey!" Sakura-chan said. "Quit talking about Sasuke-kun like that!"

"Ha! So even you think he's a bastard!" I crowed triumphantly.

Sakura-chan recoiled, looking shocked and began frantically waving her arms in denial. Sasuke-teme just grunted, giving me a weird look. Kakashi-sensei coughed suspiciously before he replied.

"I was looking for something a bit more objective than that, Naruto."

"Alright," I grumbled. "We've got an exhausted jounin and three genin."

"Better," he said. "Back to Sakura. What is our mission?"

"To protect Tazuna-san while he finishes building his bridge."

"Correct," Kakashi-sensei said, doing his smiling eye thing. "With all of that in mind, what would you do, Naruto?"

I sighed, dejected. "Focus on protecting the client while preparing as best we can to fend off any attacks," I said.

Kakashi nodded. "In other circumstances," he said, "your idea might have worked, but we don't have the resources to send any of our team into hostile territory. Now then, let's start the training."

He stood up, picked up the nearby crutches and began hobbling out into the woods. He seemed to pick his spot at random – I don't _think _it was the same clearing every time, anyway – and motioned for us to stop.

"Before we get into, though, I want to talk to you about the ninja ability, chakra," he began.

"Argh! Can't we just skip that, sensei? We all know this stuff already!" I yelled. I really didn't want to suffer through his explanation again.

"Hmm... well, if you're sure. What we are going to be doing today is... climbing trees!"

"Sensei...," Sakura-chan said slowly, "we can already do that."

"Ah, but you'll be doing this without your hands!"

I noticed Sasuke-teme perk up at that, and he eventually asked, "How?"

"Well, watch," Kakashi-sensei said. He placed one foot on the tree, then raised his crutches and pressed them against the tree. A moment later, he was hobbling up the tree just like he'd been walking on the ground earli-

"Holy shit!" I yelled, pointing at him.

"Yes, it is quite...," he began, but trailed off as I ran up the tree and stopped next to him, staring at the crutches.

"How are you doing that?" I asked. I noticed Sakura-chan walking up the tree and stopping next to us, looking curious as to what I was talking about. Sasuke-teme was still on the ground, glowering at the three of us. I wasn't interested in that, though.

"I... see you both already know this exercise," Kakashi-sensei said slowly. "I must say Naruto, I'm very happy with your diligence in training. You too, Sakura."

"Thanks, sensei!" she said, smiling widely.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei, how were you doing that?"

Kakashi-sensei didn't answer immediately, giving me a very strange look. Finally he said, "The same way you are now?"

"Nono, not _that_! The thing with the crutches! How were you tree-walking with the crutches!"

He blinked. "Oh, that. That's a much more advanced type of chakra manipulation. I'm not sure if you are-"

"Can you show us, sensei?" Sakura asked. "We've already learned water walking, and we don't know what to work on next."

"You have?" For once, he actually sounded genuinely surprised. "You _both _have. What about Sasuke?" he asked, turning to look at the boy who was still standing at the base of the tree.

"I'm sure he already knows-" Sakura began, before realizing that her crush hadn't joined them.

"Sakura-chan ran into me while I was practicing and I showed her how to do it. She picked it up a lot faster than I did, though," I added ruefully. "Sasuke-teme never sticks around to keep training and I never see him outside of team meetings."

"Hmm...," Kakashi-sensei said, rubbing the side of his face. "Why don't you two head back to Tazuna's house and wait for me. I'll be along shortly."

I stared at him for a moment, trying to wrap my head around what he'd said. This had _never _happened before.

I accompanied Sakura-chan back to the house in a daze, trying to figure out why Kakashi-sensei was changing up the training this time when he always did the same thing before. Even when I showed him that I knew tree-walking and water-walking, he just told me to keep practicing. The only thing I could think of was because Sakura-chan knew how to do it too.

We settled down in the living room to wait, and I quickly noticed that Sakura-chan looked worried.

"What's wrong, Sakura-chan?" I asked.

"Do you think he's mad at us?"

"Huh?"

"For training outside of the team meetings? Or maybe for training without Sasuke-kun?"

"No way!" I yelled, jumping to my feet. "Kakashi-sensei isn't mad at us! He's probably going to give us a super-awesome new jutsu."

"Well, you're both right and wrong," Kakashi-sensei said as he entered the house. "I am definitely not mad at you," he said firmly. "In fact, I'm rather happy that you are both taking your ninja career seriously enough to train on your own time."

Sakura-chan calmed down and blushed, and I nodded sagely.

"On the other hand, I'm not going to be teaching you a 'super-awesome' jutsu either."

"Aww," I groaned, disappointed. "Why not?"

"Before we continue, let's head out back," he said, ignoring my question. He lead us out to the dock behind Tazuna-jiji's house, stopping when we were at the edge of the pier.

"Please demonstrate the water-walking exercise," he directed.

With a shrug, both Sakura-chan and I stepped off the pier, smoothly landing on top of the water. Well, Sakura-chan made it look smooth anyway, as she barely made a ripple when she landed. I ended up splashing some water as I landed, but stabilized quickly and turned to face Kakashi-sensei triumphantly.

He nodded thoughtfully as he watched me, then turned to look at Sakura-chan. "How long can you stay on top of the water?" he asked her.

"Only about twenty minutes," she admitted, "but I've been getting better!"

"Alright," he said, "here's what we're going to do."

* * *

><p>"Ninja are weird," Tazuna-jiji muttered.<p>

"Ah, come on, jiji, cut us a break!" I whi- asked politely. "Kakashi-sensei is making us do this!"

Tazuna-jiji just shook his head and turned back to his work on the bridge. It was a bright, clear day and the bridge builder was trying to make the most of it, snapping orders to the workers left and right. Large wooden beams were being hefted about and all kinds of other work that I had _no idea _what it was for was going on.

"Hey, Sakura-chan?" I asked, leaning against the side of the bridge.

"I'm not talking to you right now, remember?" I heard her reply.

"But Sakura-chan!"

"Argh! What _is it_?"

"I need another chopstick."

She didn't reply immediately, and I leaned out further and looked down. "Hey, Saku-_ack_!" I yelped, scrambling backwards to avoid the piece of wood hurtling towards my head like a kunai. It curved through the air and eventually landed on the bridge a few feet away from me.

"Thank you!" I called out, making sure to stay away from the edge.

Kakashi-sensei had decided that Sakura-chan needed to work on her endurance and that I needed to refine my control even further. He had also decided that since we were both much further along in our training than he had expected that we could take up our duties guarding Tazuna-jiji while training at the same time.

My training exercise was to pick up a kunai by channeling my chakra through a slim piece of wood and making it stick to the kunai. He said I could hold the chopstick normally at first, but eventually he wanted me to do it while making the chopstick stick to my finger as well.

Sakura-chan's exercise was a lot simpler; she just had to stand on the side of the bridge. Kakashi-sensei had decided that wasn't enough, though, and so she was also in charge of supplying new chopsticks whenever I broke one. I thought we were going to buy some, but Kakashi had just cut down a convenient tree branch and shoved it into Sakura-chan's hands, telling her to carve off another chopstick whenever I needed one. He'd been very particular about how she was supposed to do it, too, although I hadn't really followed that part very well.

I picked up the squared off piece of wood – Sakura-chan was getting much better at making them, as this one even had a slightly tapered point – and crouched down next to my kunai. I'd determined early on that the chopsticks lasted a lot longer if I had the kunai on the ground first; they tended to break almost immediately if the kunai was in my other hand and I let go of it.

I focused, trying to feel my chakra moving through the chopstick. Kakashi-sensei said it had to flow in and out evenly, just like the chakra flowed through my body. After a few seconds, it felt like it was working right, so I poked the kunai with the chopstick. I held it there for a second, struggling to feel my chakra entering the kunai, and pulled on the chopstick slightly. I grinned widely when the kunai moved along with it – I was really starting to get this part down.

I moved the chopstick a little more, grinning as the kunai kept moving along with it. Now came the hard part, though. I slowly, ever so slowly, started to lift the chopstick into the air. My eyes widened in anticipation as the tip of the kunai tilted...

Then the chopstick exploded in my hand. Again.

I grumbled to myself quietly, picking more splinters out of my hand, and turned back to the edge of the bridge.

"Hey, Sakura-chan?"

I gulped when I heard loud stomping sounds coming towards me. I cringed when I saw the edges of an angry aura peek over the side. I dodged when Sakura herself hopped onto the railing and threw a small chunk of wood at my head.

"How many of those damn things can you go through, _**shannaro**_?" she snarled, panting in rage. She hopped onto the surface of the bridge and took one step towards me, then her knees suddenly buckled.

I sprang forward to catch her, and she ended up leaning on my shoulder as I eased her down to lean against the railing.

"Are you alright, Sakura-chan?" I asked worriedly.

"I'm... fine," she said, still panting. "Just... need to... rest."

I just nodded as I sat back, watching her. Her pink hair was plastered to her forehead with sweat, and her red shirt was drenched.

"Hang on a sec," I said, hopping up. I ran over to where Tazuna-jiji kept the drinkable water and pulled out two bottles, one for me and one for Sakura-chan. I rushed back over and handed one to her. She took it gratefully, smiling at me, then chugged half of it in one go.

"Thanks, Naruto," she said as she screwed the cap back on. "I needed that."

"No problem, Sakura-chan!"

We sat there in silence for a bit as Sakura-chan recovered and I just enjoyed sitting this close to her. Eventually, though, I remembered that I was supposed to be training.

"Do you... have another chopstick?" I asked slowly, cringing when she glared at me. She shot her hand out to point to the block of wood she had thrown earlier.

"That's all that's left," she growled. "You went through that entire damn branch."

"... oh," I said, blushing. "Sorry."

She gave me another halfhearted glare, but eventually just shrugged it off.

We lapsed into silence again, and my mind began to wander back to my problem with the Kage Bunshin Barrage.

"Hey, Sakura-chan? Do you think you could help me figure something out?"

She eyed me curiously, but nodded. "Sure," she said, "what is it?"

"You know that Kage Bunshin Barrage move I used?"

She let out a quick laugh. "It's a little hard to forget since you keep yelling the name all the time."

"There's something wrong with it."

"Really? Like what?"

"Well, when I tried to use it last night, it wasn't working."

"Is it working now?"

"I... haven't actually tried it since then," I confessed.

"Well I won't be able to help much if I can't see you using it," she pointed out.

"Yeah...," I said. I looked around for someone to use it on, but no bandits decided to show up at that moment. The only people around were Tazuna-jiji and the people working on the bridge, and I didn't want to attack them... and of course there was no way I was going to attack Sakura-chan.

"Aha!" I said, jumping to my feet. I made a quick handsign and called out, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Several puffs of spoke surrounded us, soon clearing away to reveal four shadow clones.

"Oh, come on, Boss, this is just cruel!" one cried out.

"Yeah! This is clone abuse" another shouted.

"Report him to Hokage-jiji!" a third yelled.

"Better you than me!" I yelled. "Kage Bunshin Barrage!"

I felt that cold water sensation again, and one of my clones got dog-piled by a new batch of clones that popped out of thin air. I turned to face Sakura-chan and found her giving me a very odd look.

"Did you just... nevermind," she said, shaking her head. "What's wrong with it? It seemed to work fine to me."

"Do you think he's done now?" one of the clones whispered to another.

"Shh... don't remind him we're here," the other clone responded.

"Hey, I've got an idea," a third clone said quietly.

"I know," I said ruefully, "I felt it work this time... but last night it just stopped working for no reason."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" one of the clones suddenly shouted, pointing at me. I whirled around, staring at my clone in shock, then cringed as I waited for the oncoming assault.

…

I breathed a sigh of relief when no new clones popped out to pummel me. Then I turned to glare at the mutinous clone. He was slowly backing away, waving his hands in the air.

"You would have done the same!" he shouted, before turning and making a run for it.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I yelled.

"No fair!" he managed to get out before he was launched into the air and dispelled.

I turned back to Sakura-chan, who was now gaping at me with a highly disturbed expression on her face.

"See what I mean?" I said. "It doesn't seem to work all the time now. It never did this before."

Before she could reply, I heard another of the clones cry out, "Get him!"

I whipped back around just in time for the first clone to tackle me.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage! Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I snapped as I grappled with the traitor. The two remaining clones were yanked off of me and slammed onto the bridge, dispelling them. I slowly stood and dusted myself off before turning back to Sakura-chan yet again. Her mouth wasn't hanging open this time, but she was still giving me a really strange look.

"What?" I asked.

She shook herself and her expression shifted into a thoughtful look. "Well, it's worked every time _you _used it so far... it'd be nice if we could test it some more," she said, then winced. "Do you _have _to use it on a person?"

"I... think so?" I replied. "I can try that, I guess." I turned and spotted a chair nearby. "Kage Bunshin Barrage!" No cold water sensation, no clones popping out of nowhere. "Looks like it has to be a person," I said.

"Alright... I guess you need to make some more clones, then," she said slowly.

"No problem!" I said, quickly making the needed handsign and calling out the name of the technique.

"Whatcha need us to do, Sakura-chan?" the first clone asked. The other three just nodded in agreement, staring at Sakura-chan expectantly.

She didn't answer immediately, instead looking back and forth between the clones and me. "You aren't going to attack him or anything?"

"Nah," one of them said, shrugging. "You asked for us, so here we are."

"O...k then," she said. "First, can one of you try to use that move on the real Naruto?"

"Geh," I said, cringing. "Do they have to?"

"It's only fair," she replied, looking like she couldn't believe she was actually saying that.

"Sure thing!" the second clone said, sounding _way _too happy about it. "Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I breathed another sigh of relief when the attack failed to happen.

"Alright, so it can't be turned on the original," Sakura-chan said to herself, her expression starting to light up as she got caught up in the problem. "Now try to use it on one of the other clones."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" the third clone snapped quickly, pointing at the second.

"Cheater!" the second one shouted, cringing. Still nothing happened.

"Or maybe the clones can't use it at all," she amended.

"Ah, man," they all said in unison, "that sucks."

"Alright," Sakura-chan said, turning to face me. "Now use it on one of the clones again."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I said, and one of the clones found themselves pummeled out of existence.

"Hmm...," Sakura-chan said, resting her chin on her fist and tapping one foot on the bridge as she got lost in thought. "Again."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I repeated. Nothing happened.

"There you go!" Sakura-chan said firmly, nodding in satisfaction. "You can only use it five times in a certain time period."

"What?" I cried, echoed by my clones. "That's cr- oh. So _that's _what the extra points do!"

"Points? What are you talking about?"

"Uh... nothing, Sakura-chan!" I said quickly. "How did you figure that out, anyway?"

"Well, you - the real you - used it five times just now, and the sixth time didn't work. You also used it five times yesterday – once on each of the two ninja on the road, once on Zabuza's clone, and then twice on Zabuza himself. You tried to use it a sixth time on the hunter-nin, and it didn't work, just like now." She nodded firmly, then her brow furrowed. "That's a really weird jutsu, though... never heard of one that had a built-in limit like that...," she said to herself, trailing off at the end.

I stared at her blankly for a long moment. "Wow, Sakura-chan," I said finally, "I knew you were smart, but you actually remembered all of that? _I _didn't even remember all of that, and I did it!" My clones just nodded silently in agreement, staring at her in awe.

She just grinned at me, that wide, beaming grin that did strange things to my stomach. "Now that we've got that sorted out, we should get back to training. First thing we need to do is get another branch..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Naruto begins the long, arduous journey from newbie to player. I'll give him enough credit to avoid labeling him as a n00b.  
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**I was this || close to having all of Sasuke's lines be "Hn." For instance, the scene where the team is talking about hunting down Zabuza was originally like this: **

"Good so far. Sasuke, what else?"

"Hn," Sasuke-teme grunted.

"A thorough analysis. Naruto, what do we have on our side?"

**While amusing for a little bit, though, I couldn't really justify it long-term. On the other hand, I did it for the first chapter, and I don't think anyone even noticed the difference. }:)**

**Other options in****cluded an "Uchiha Language Trait" (possibly translating everything Sasuke, Itachi, or Madara says into haiku or iambic pentameter) or treating Sasuke's dialog as bugged where all of his speech bubbles reference the same bit of text.**

**I went back and read the parts of the manga that covered the Wave Mission (fair warning, Haku is a girl - I dare anyone to refer to Chapter 21, Page 2 and tell me otherwise) and noted that Kakashi was still using his crutches as he walked up the tree. He probably didn't actually do in canon what I have him doing here, but it provided a good way to change up the scene and was a useful concept.**** Although, since they can tree climb with shoes on, it's nothing terribly new either.**

**The scene with the kage bunshin wasn't /just/ there for humor - there is a method to my madness, and it's actually suggested in the scene itself. Basically the clones Naruto summons are influenced by the reason he summoned them. Usually he uses them in battle and they all work together against the enemy. If he summons them just to mess with them or try things out, they will respond in kind... to a point. They know they are clones and will ultimately defer to the original if it's important, but they are also him with all the irreverence and annoying traits that comes with that.  
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**Thanks to everyone who suggested abilities, skills, tweaks, etc. Hopefully I'll have an update to the Manual in the next few days that will show how the mechanics have gotten fleshed out.**

**Free (virtual) cookies to anyone who spots the less obvious examples where I've worked specific bits of the "game" into the story and correctly identifies what it's an example of; I have two specific ones in mind for this chapter. The majority of what happens in the "real world" is reflected in the "game" somehow, be it branching dialog trees, side quests, alternate paths, etc., but there are also places where the "game" influences the "real world" instead.  
><strong>

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**


	3. Life Five: Ninja's Creed

"Good morning, Naruto-kun," Tsunami-nee-chan called out as I entered the kitchen.

"Morning, Tsunami-nee-chan," I replied, stifling a yawn. The bastard and Sakura-chan were already up, the former brooding and the latter looking slightly tired as they ate breakfast. She'd been so exhausted after all the training she'd done on the bridge that I ended up having to carry her back. When we finally got back to Tazuna-jiji's house she'd even thanked me!

Best. Day. _Ever_.

I shook off my thoughts and focused back on the kitchen. "Where's Kakashi-sensei?" I asked, noting that our teacher wasn't around.

"Yo!" I heard him say from behind me.

I most definitely did not shriek in fright as I jumped into the air and whirled around. "Don't _do _that!" I cried, pointing at him indignantly.

His mask hid it, but I just knew that he was laughing at me. The bastard just grunted, but Sakura-chan and Tsunami-nee-chan were both laughing too, although they didn't sound mean about it.

"So, we're going to mix things up a little," Kakashi-sensei announced abruptly. "Sasuke is going to guard Tazuna while working on his tree-climbing today."

The bastard just grunted.

"Sakura-chan pushed herself a little too hard yesterday and her reserves are still recovering, so she'll join him and work on refining her new chopstick technique!"

Sakura-chan's entire body twitched and I instinctively ducked. Kakashi-sensei was doing that eye-smile thing again while Tsunami-nee-chan just looked on, confused.

"And Naruto will be working with me today."

"Alright!" I cheered, jumping out of my chair. "Awesome jutsu, here I come!"

* * *

><p>Once everyone had split up to begin their respective tasks for the day, Kakashi-sensei led me outside and started hobbling into the woods.<p>

"So, Naruto, I just want to say again that I'm very happy that you've been training on your own time. All serious ninja do that, and even the Hokage still has to find time to train to maintain his skill."

I grinned, rubbing my nose to hide my embarrassment. "Yeah, I'm just awesome like that."

"That said, I would like you to give me a rundown of what you've been doing so that I can give you some pointers, possibly clear up any questions you might have. You've got the tree-climbing down and are well on your way with water-walking. How far did you get with your chopstick exercise yesterday?"

"Uh... not very," I admitted. "I could move the kunai a little, but then the chopsticks sort of... blew up."

His pace faltered for a moment. "Really," he said flatly.

"Is that bad?"

"No, not bad," he said as his pace evened out again. "Just... a little surprising." He broke off a small branch from a nearby tree and handed me a piece of it. "I'd like you to demonstrate that, if you don't mind."

"Sure," I shrugged. I pulled out a kunai and dropped it on the ground. Kakashi-sensei watched silently as the kunai moved slightly before the stick shattered in my hand.

"Interesting," he said musingly. "The only thing that I can tell you at the moment is that you need to use less chakra... a _lot _less chakra."

"That's what I thought, too," I said, pleased that I had already figured out the problem. Not that I was any closer to fixing it, yet, but that's what training is for.

"Did you have any problems getting the chopstick to stick to the kunai?" he asked next.

"I did the first couple of times, yeah. I figured that part out quickly, though!"

"Well done," he said, but he sounded distracted. After a moment, he asked, "What other skills have you been practicing?"

"Um..., my Kage Bunshin?"

"Besides that."

I frowned and scratched my head. "That's it."

Everything was quiet for a long moment, and I started to feel a little uncomfortable with the way Kakashi-sensei was staring at me. He shook his head after a moment, and the tension passed.

"Normally I would tell you to keep working on your chakra control," he began, "but I think you are doing that very well on your own. Instead we'll focus on your physical skills."

"Aww... can't I learn a super-awesome jutsu instead?"

Kakashi-sensei sighed and rubbed his face. "Tell you what, Naruto. We'll spend the first part of the day working on your physical skills, and if you do a good job I'll teach you one new jutsu at the end."

"Yes!" I cried, jumping into the air. "What do I need to do?"

What followed was a long, grueling session where Kakashi-sensei made me drop into a stance and start running through various attacks and blocks. He kept making me change how I was standing and how I was moving, and he'd make me start over every time I "overextended" or "lost balance". It was really annoying, but after two hours of that I did feel more comfortable with how I was moving.

"Alright, now let's see you actually put that into action. Make a few clones."

"You mean we're not done yet?"

Kakashi-sensei just gave me a look, and I sighed and made the clones.

"Alright, now face off one at a time, you against a clone, using what you just practiced."

We spent another two hours doing that and I must have gone through a hundred clones. Even I could tell that something was different by the end of that, though.

"Very good, Naruto," Kakashi-sensei said, eye-smiling again. "For a single day that was some remarkable improvement."

"Thanks, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Now, as I promised, I will teach you a new jutsu."

"Yes!" I shouted, leaping into the air. "What is it? Is it gonna be the Chidori? Oh, what about the Eight Gates thing, that would be _awesome_!"

"No, nothing quite that level," he responded. "Today you are going to learn... the Kunai Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

"That's... isn't that just like the normal Kage Bunshin?" I asked. I couldn't help but be a little disappointed; the Kage Bunshin was awesome, yeah, but I _did _already know it.

"Not at all," Kakashi-sensei corrected. "Allow me to demonstrate." With that, his hand whipped out and threw a kunai. Ten more kunai appeared out of thin air and all of them struck a nearby tree. A second later, the extra kunai vanished, leaving holes behind where they had been.

I stared at the tree, my brain slowly absorbing what I had just seen and connecting it with how I used the normal Kage Bunshin.

"Yes! I _knew _you'd teach me an awesome jutsu!"

"I'm glad that you like it," he said, "but before I teach it to you there's something you need to understand."

"Sure thing, Kakashi-sensei," I agreed. Anything to learn something that awesome.

"Let's imagine a scenario where you, Sasuke, and Sakura are all fighting a group of enemies. You have managed to defeat your opponent, and you have the chance to throw kunai at the other opponents from afar in order to support Sasuke and Sakura. With me so far?"

"Yep!"

"Now, suppose that the one you aim at is... let's say as far from Sakura as that tree is from me. You could easily hit the enemy with that kunai, right?"

"Absolutely!"

"Alright, now suppose that there's ten opponents, just as far away as the one was, all of them about to attack Sakura. If you only have time to throw one kunai, would you use the technique I just showed you to take them out?"

I opened my mouth to say yes, but paused as the scene played out in my head. If creating kunai was as easy as it was to create full on shadow clones, then I could make a _lot _of them. And if I did that...

"I'm glad to see you understand," Kakashi-sensei said, noting my suddenly pale face. "This technique, like all potentially lethal jutsu, is not to be used lightly. Never forget that."

I nodded solemnly at my teacher. I'd never be able to forgive myself if I hurt Sakura-chan because I was careless.

"Now then, the handseals are actually quite simple...,"

An hour later, Kakashi-sensei felt I was ready to try out the technique for the first time. He had me create a clone to do the test, though, while both of us watched from nearly a hundred meters away and behind the clone. He also made me give the clone my real kunai - something about it making everything a lot easier.

"Remember!" Kakashi-sensei shouted. "Use as little chakra as possible!"

I saw the clone wave, and then make a throwing motion. Nothing happened the first time, or the second, but on the third try a wave of black swept through the clearing. My jaw dropped when I realized that those were all kunai, then I let out a loud whoop, mirrored by my clone who ran back towards us.

"I said as little chakra as possible," Kakashi-sensei reminded the clone.

"I did!" the clone protested.

Kakashi-sensei rubbed his forehead for a moment, then just nodded. "Alright, let's go see the clearing, maybe get a rough count of the number of kunai you made."

The clearing looked like a herd of wildcats had passed through it – the ground was torn up and all of the trees were shredded. One kunai was sticking out of one of the trees, and two more were sitting at the bottom of the tree, thoroughly nicked and scratched.

"Aw, man," I whined as I picked them up. "Those were some of my best kunai." They weren't _completely _ruined, but they were close.

I turned to look at Kakashi-sensei, only to find him surveying the clearing with his sharingan eye exposed. He covered it up quickly but didn't say anything, looking thoughtful.

"How many did I make?" I asked curiously.

He didn't answer my question, instead turning to look at me with a serious expression. "Until your chakra control greatly improves, only use that technique when all of your allies are behind you."

I nodded just as seriously, horrible flashes of Sakura-chan getting hit by those kunai running through my mind. "I promise," I said firmly.

Kakashi-sensei relaxed. "Well, I think that'll be enough for today. You should spend the rest of your time working on your chopstick exercise. I daresay Sakura-chan will have a whole stockpile for you to run through."

We turned and started heading back towards Tazuna-jiji's house.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei... how many _did _I make?"

I twitched when he pulled out his perverted book and started reading, somehow managing to use his crutches at the same time.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei! Seriously, how many did I make?"

"Hmm?" he said, turning to look at me. "Did you say something?"

* * *

><p>The next day Kakashi-sensei took Sakura-chan off to train while I was stuck guarding the bridge with the bastard. I tried to start a conversation with him – though I'm struggling to remember why I bothered – but he just grunted and brushed me off. Fine with me.<p>

Once we reached the bridge, the bastard just started running up and down the side of the bridge, still not actually saying anything to me. I stuck to the top of the bridge with Tazuna-jiji and practiced the exercise Kakashi-sensei had assigned me. I ran through the rest of Sakura-chan's awesome chopsticks before noon, though, and started looking for something to do.

"Hey, Tazuna-jiji," I called out.

"What is it, kid? You see something?" he asked, distracted.

"Nah, nothin' like that." I knew nothing was going to happen for another... four days now. "You got anything you need help with? I'm out of chopsticks."

"Not unless you got a dozen workers hiding somewhere; one scrawny runt like you isn't going to help much," he said, smirking. I'd gotten rather mad the first time he'd said that, but I knew that was just how he talked and that deep down he thought I was awesome. Besides, if it was numbers he wanted that was definitely something I could provide.

"Is that all?" I asked, smirking widely. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" I called out, summoning up over twenty clones.

All of the other workers stopped, their attention drawn to the small horde of me that had appeared. Tazuna-jiji just stared at me for a moment before he grinned.

"You know what, kid? You're alright!" he said, giving me a thumbs up. "Now, how many more of those can you make?"

* * *

><p>I wandered into the kitchen, yawning widely as I shook off my sleep. Kakashi-sensei had spent most of our second one-on-one session focusing on my taijutsu again, but I couldn't complain too much. The changes were small, but I was definitely improving a lot under his guidance – I just wish he'd done this sort of thing before.<p>

Sakura-chan was already at the table, having once again gotten up before the rest of the team. She shot me a smile and a wave as I entered the room, and I waved back.

"Mornin', Sakura-chan!" I called out happily.

"Thanks again, Tsunami-nee-chan!" I said as she placed a plate in front of me. There wasn't a whole lot of food, but whatever she made tasted almost as good as ramen!

"You're welcome, Naruto-kun," she replied. "Like I keep saying, this is the least I can do for the ninja who are protecting my father."

I began to eat, my gaze wandering over the neatly organized and clean kitchen. Tsunami-nee-chan had returned to the stove, humming some nameless tune and smiling softly as she continued cooking, her movements deft and sure. Watching her reminded me of Ayame-nee-chan and Teuchi-jiji, in more ways than one.

I looked out the window next, noting the sunlight playing off the water of the small lake situated near the house. The weather was going to be pleasant today, it looked like – but then the weather didn't really change whenever we ended up going to Wave, did it?

I then turned my attention back to Sakura-chan, who was currently finishing off her breakfast. Her motions were neat as she divided the meal into small bites and ate each bite slowly, almost daintily. My mind wandered a bit, imagining that this scene was happening back in Konoha and that it was just the two of us. I would make breakfast – no, my one attempt hadn't turned out so well. Sakura-chan would make breakfast – yeah, she was certain to be awesome like that – and then we'd both sit down and eat, just talking and enjoying spending time with each other.

"Hmm..., it's been almost a week now," Sakura-chan said suddenly, pulling me out of my daydream. "When do you think Zabuza is going to try again?"

"I bet it would take him the full week to recover from his wounds," I replied, knowing that what I was saying was less a guess and more an absolute certainty. "So... maybe tomorrow?"

Yeah, it would happen tomorrow. Despite the repetition I still remembered the details of the first time vividly. Zabuza had killed a lot of the workers before the rest of my team got to the bridge, and by the time I arrived Haku had-

Shit.

Shitshitshitshit_shiiiiiit_.

"Naruto?" I heard Sakura-chan's concerned voice call out from behind me, but I was already bolting out of the house and running into the woods at full speed.

I can't believe I forgot about Haku! Stupid Kakashi-sensei changing everything up and throwing off my sense of time!

I scrambled through the woods, grateful that I at least remembered the clearing where Haku and I met every repetition. He would be out gathering herbs and stuff to help Zabuza, and we would have our conversation about precious people and true strength. I hadn't yet found a way to convince Haku not to go through with the attack on the bridge, but I just _knew _I was getting closer.

After several minutes, I burst into the clearing, panting lightly with exertion. Haku was there! I wasn't too late!

"Are you ok?" Haku asked. One of his hands was holding the basket while the other was concealed inside of it. His body was tense and even I could tell he was ready to bolt at any moment.

"Fine!" I said, smiling widely. "I was just, uh... running! Yeah, I make sure I exercise in the morning!" I laughed nervously, rubbing the back of my head.

"I see," Haku said, giggling softly. Kami, but that messed with my head. Haku was a guy, but he was cuter th- _almost _as cute as Sakura-chan!

"So anyway, what are you doing out this early? Gathering flowers?" I asked, steering the conversation back onto its normal course.

We went back and forth, covering my dreams of becoming a ninja and how it was important to protect precious people. I'd had this conversation several times, but it never failed to renew my determination as well as my respect for Haku. Even if he got stuck with a teacher like Zabuza, he was still one of the most awesome ninja I knew, and not just because of that ice stuff either.

"So, uh, what do you think about Gato?" I asked smoothly. The direct approach hadn't worked out so well before – Haku just pretended to not know what I was talking about, or fled – so I was going to be sneaky about it this time around.

"He's... rich and powerful," Haku responded slowly. "He doesn't seem to care about what happens to this country, but I'm sure we'll manage to get by somehow."

"Yeah! Naruto Uzumaki is here, so Wave is as good as saved!" I said confidently. I – well, _we – _had already saved it four times now, after all. "But, uh, yeah, Gato is totally evil and stuff," I added. "I hear he even betrays his own people, tossing them aside like garbage just to save himself a few ryo." My tone was harsh as I finished, my mind remembering the image of Zabuza and Haku laid out side by side, dead because of Gato.

"Yes, he is quite greedy," Haku agreed. He stood, smoothing out his kimono and picking up his basket once again. "I need to be getting back, but it was good to meet someone like you. I'm sure that you'll become strong in the future."

"You know it! And it was good to meet you too!"

"Let's meet again somewhere," Haku said as he left the clearing.

I watched him leave, then sat in silence in the clearing as I wondered if Haku had really believed what I told him about Gato. He hadn't acted all that differently from the prior times, but I refused to believe he was going to end up dying again!

"Naruto!" Sakura-chan panted out as she burst into the clearing. "What's wrong? Why'd you run off like that?"

I jumped to my feet, smiling broadly. "Sakura-chan! Nothing's wrong, I just remembered something I had to do!"

"All the way out here in the woods?" she asked slowly, looking around the clearing.

"Yep! But it's taken care of, so we can head back now!"

Sakura-chan's fist was clenched and trembling, but she just turned on her heel and stalked out of the clearing. "Don't make me worry like that, idiot!" she shouted over her shoulder.

* * *

><p>I left a few clones behind to guard Tsunami-nee-chan and Inari and joined my team as we all traveled to the bridge the next morning. Kakashi-sensei felt that the odds were very high that Zabuza would show up soon and wanted all of us there to help out.<p>

It had only taken one question from me to convince Tazuna-jiji to have his workers start showing up later in the morning – "What would happen if Zabuza showed up before we did?" Since I was helping out with clones more often, he was actually a little ahead of schedule now and could afford to lose an hour here and there. Sure, I could only handle the bits that didn't require actual training or experience, but there was actually quite a lot of that to go around, and my presence let all the other workers focus on the complicated bits.

We arrived to find the bridge shrouded in mist – like always – but more importantly there were no dead bodies this time around.

Normally we started fighting immediately, spurred on by Tazuna-jiji running ahead to check on his friends. He didn't have to do that this time, though, which opened an entirely new path for me to follow: stalling.

"Hey, No-Brows!" I yelled into the mist. Everyone was silent for a second, and I could feel my team staring at me, but I soldiered on. "Has Gato actually paid you any money yet?"

I heard Zabuza chuckling darkly in the mist, and he eventually replied. "Is that how they train ninja in Konoha these days?" he asked. "Even for a genin, his skill at mind games is pathetic."

Pathetic? _Pathetic?_ Oh, no way was I letting that slide.

"Pathetic, huh? More pathetic than one of Kiri's Seven Swordmen getting hired by a midget to assassinate an old drunk and then _failing_?"

"Hey!" I heard Tazuna-jiji protest from behind me. "Who are you calling an old drunk, runt?"

"Naruto...," Kakashi-sensei said, his voice pitched to carry. "You shouldn't provoke someone like Zabuza, especially on sensitive subjects like that. It probably took him a long time to work up the courage to face us again after getting humiliated the last time."

Gah! Kakashi-sensei was trying to steal my thunder! Before I could come up with something to top that, though, Zabuza replied.

"You sound awfully confident, Copy Ninja Kakashi, but your precious sharingan isn't going to help you this time. You should have made sure I was dead when you had the chance, because I won't be making the same mistake."

No! If this kept up the fighting would start!

"You never did answer my question, No-Brows!" I shouted. "Do you really think a greedy little midget like Gato is going to pay you? I bet he's on his way here right now with a ton of thugs to try to take us all out, just so he can save some money!"

"Nice try, kid, but even a little shit like Gato isn't that stupid."

No, he was. He really, really was. Still, Zabuza wasn't taking me seriously and I could feel the tension rising. Think! I needed something to throw him off for a little while longer. Gato always showed up pretty quickly after the fighting started, so he should be pretty close by now; I just needed a little more time. I didn't have any good ideas though, so I just went with the first thing that came to mind.

"Haku!" I suddenly shouted. "Your fake hunter-nin partner is Haku, he has an ice bloodline, he's got this funky ice dome thing where he can move between the mirrors, and he uses senbon all the time!"

My team and Tazuna-jiji were staring at me like I was crazy, but I was more concerned with Zabuza's reaction. So far, there wasn't one, which could be a good thing.

"If I'm right about that, then I could be right about Gato too, couldn't I?" I called out.

More silence.

"Naruto," Kakashi-sensei whispered as he crouched next to me, "are you actually being serious? Is all of that true?"

"Of course it is, Kakashi-sensei," I whispered back. "I wouldn't lie in a situation like this!"

He wiped his hand over his face and let out a sigh, then said, "Alright, I believe you. We _will _be talking about this later, but, for now... just let me take it from here. Don't say _anything else_, alright?"

"But!"

"Alright?" he stressed, his voice stern.

I didn't like it, but I knew better than to go against Kakashi-sensei when he was being all serious like this.

"I wouldn't pay too much attention to my genin, Zabuza-kun," Kakashi-sensei called out. "He's just a little nervous about his first mission. I'm sure his _completely random guess_ as to the abilities of your group has _nothing_ to do with the fact that we knew you would be here in Wave and that our real mission has nothing to do with the bridge. I'm sure that any large groups of mercenaries entering the battlefield are a _complete coincidence, _and aren't meant to serve as a distraction so that we could capture a missing-nin operating too close to the Land of Fire. I'm sure that Konoha isn't interested _at all_ in securing another bloodline and possibly acquiring one of Kiri's Seven Swords, with or without its wielder... right?"

More silence.

I guess it was because everything was so quiet that we heard to the shuffling of feet and the clank of metal on metal coming from the far end of the bridge. It sounded like Gato and his group had shown up, finally!

"Well, well...," Zabuza's came echoing out of the mist. "It looks like the little brat wasn't so full of hot air after all. I'm quite curious why you know so much about us, but I have more pressing matters to attend to. Since my employer has breached the contract, I'll be collecting my _severance _fee." He let out a dark chuckle, and I felt a chill go down my spine. "I'll be seeing you around, Copy Ninja Kakashi."

"Zabuza!" Gato's voice came echoing out of the mist. "Why haven't you killed the bridge builder yet! I'm not paying you to slack off!"

There was no answer.

"Hmm...," Kakashi-sensei said, rubbing his chin. "How many mercenaries would you say he brought, Naruto?"

"Uh...," I muttered, trying to recall. There had been a lot of them, I'm sure, but I honestly never paid attention to the exact number. "A few dozen?" I answered finally.

He nodded then turned to Tazuna-jiji. "Anything important at the end of the bridge that we can't afford to damage?"

Tazuna-jiji shook his head rapidly, looking pale. "No, nothing. Are we going to be ok? I mean, that's a lot of people to fight..."

Kakashi-sensei nodded again. "We've got two options," he mused, talking to the team in general. "One, we can engage in close combat. One-on-one any of us could take out a common thug without a problem, but there are a lot of them and in the confusion you guys will almost certainly end up taking a few hits."

"What's the other option?" Sakura-chan whispered.

"We use jutsu to take them out at long-range."

"I don't have any jutsu like that," she admitted. "But I bet Sasuke-kun does! He's got his fireball!"

"I was actually thinking of something with a longer range than that," Kakashi-sensei said, turning to me. "Are you up for this, Naruto?"

My face hardened as I thought about what those thugs would do, what they had probably already done elsewhere. I looked Kakashi-sensei in the eye and nodded firmly.

"Yes."

He held my gaze for several seconds before he nodded in return. "Three volleys should do it."

"Zabuza!" Gato called out again. "Answer me, you worthless ninja!"

"Kakashi-sensei, what-" Sakura-chan started to ask, but he quieted her as I walked forward to stand between my team and Gato's thugs.

"Enough of this," I heard Gato say. "I should have known better than to rely on someone like that. Alright guys, you know the drill. Just make sure you leave some of the townspeople alive."

I pulled out three kunai even as cheering and shouting erupted at the end of the bridge. Through the thinning mist I could make out swords waving through the air and the group of men standing at the end of the bridge beginning to press forward.

I tossed the first kunai, my hands flashing through the seals with practiced ease. "Kunai Kage Bunshin no Jutsu," I said firmly. My eyes watched as the single kunai suddenly turned into a nearly solid wall of black. I threw the second kunai and repeated the technique.

This wouldn't be the first time I killed someone – or even the first time I killed some of these thugs, as strange as it sounded – but always before we were actually fighting. This was different; we weren't fighting, and they really didn't even have a chance.

The screaming started as the first wave hit.

My hands shook slightly as I threw the third kunai as hard as I could and called out the name of the technique one last time.

The screaming dropped off sharply as the second wave hit, and nearly stopped entirely once the third wave arrived.

I was still holding the last handseal when Kakashi-sensei's hand settled onto my shoulder. "I'll take it from here," he said softly. His grip tightened for a moment. "You did the right thing."

Then he was walking forward into the too-thin mist. I could see movement here and there among the mercenaries, but nearly everything was still.

I turned around abruptly, walking back to my team. My eyes scanned their faces, from Tazuna-jiji's sad and resigned expression to the surprise and... respect? on Sasuke's. It was Sakura-chan's expression that I focused on the most, though, and also the one that hurt the most. Her hands were covering her mouth and her eyes were wide as she stared at me. She flinched when we made eye contact, and I gave her a wan smile before looking away.

Then I ran to the edge of the bridge and threw up.

* * *

><p>Things progressed quickly after that. Tazuna-jiji completed his bridge in a matter of days once all the workers came back, and I even helped out some more. Inari, once he'd heard that I had killed Gato myself, looked even more awed and amazed than he usually did. Kakashi-sensei kept disappearing for hours at a time, and I <em>still <em>didn't know what he was doing even after going through this so many times.

Some things were different now, though – really different.

The bast- Sasuke was acting weird, as he didn't take every opportunity to make me look bad or show off anymore... not that there were many chances for that at the moment. He didn't glare like he used to, and even though it was odd I found that I didn't feel like pointing out every mistake he made either.

Sakura-chan was still avoiding me. Well, sort of. She didn't run away when I approached, but she kept starting to say something then interrupting himself, or looking at me funny. She didn't talk to me like she had been recently, and even the constant corrections and talk about "Sasuke-kun" this and "Sasuke-kun" from the old days would have been better than these awkward and uncomfortable silences.

So went our triumphant return to Konoha.

* * *

><p>I returned to my apartment, not even the thrill of completing (again) my first A-rank mission (this time) making me feel any better. I'd even managed to save Haku and Zabuza, which was awesome, but they'd really just run off. In my head I had imagined that they would join forces with us against Gato, and then Zabuza would realize that becoming a Konoha-nin would be much better than running around as a missing-nin and we'd all go back to Konoha together.<p>

The moment I closed the door to my apartment the world turned gray and I found myself looking at myself again – only this time I hadn't done anything to cause this.

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"Huh?"

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"No! I'm tired of not knowing what the hell is going on, so no and _hell _no!"

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"Fuck. You." Maybe it was my imagination, but I would swear for just a moment I heard deep, rumbling laughter.

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

I let out a scream of frustration before finally giving in and saying, "Yes," I said tiredly, slumping in defeat.

The gray abruptly shifted to black, and for a brief moment I worried that I had gone blind. Then a speck of blue appeared in the distance, gradually growing larger in fits and starts. After a minute the blue completely filled my vision before everything abruptly shifted into gray once more.

**Update complete. You may review the change log from within the Help Menu.**

The world faded back to normal once again.

"Help menu? There's a help menu? Where the hell is it? And what the hell is 'change log' supposed to mean?"

I charged into the kitchen, determined to see if the word "Help" was now listed. It wasn't, but I did see "Level Up".

"Well... that's something, I guess. Level Up."

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has achieved Level Six! **

**Naruto Uzumaki has five (5) skill points to assign.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select one (1) new ability.**

"Abilities."

**Choose one of the following abilities:**

**Dodge (0/5)**

**Link (0/5)**

**Overpower (0/5)**

**Restore (0/5)**

**Unique: Army of One (0/5)**

**Unique: One Man Army (0/5)**

Well obviously I was going to pick one of the Kage Bunshin abilities. But, uh... which one was which again? What was it Hinata had said? Oh yeah, Army of One was a person as strong as an army and the other one was a bunch of clones.

My recent experiences with Kage Bunshin Barrage crapping out on me meant I wasn't all that eager for a repeat of that. The eye-opening session with Kakashi-sensei about my taijutsu skills also showed me that I could really use a personal boost rather than more clones. I mean, the clones were just me anyway so-

Oh.

Wouldn't that mean that if _I _got stronger my clones would be that much stronger too? What was it I had heard... someone say? _"Zero times a hundred is still zero. Just because you can make clones doesn't mean you are stronger."_

Guess... uh, whoever that was knew what they were talking about after all.

In that case, the choice was obvious.

"Army of One!" I declared firmly. Once that was taken care of, I put the rest of my points in ninj- wait. Maybe I should put them in taijutsu instead? Kakashi-sensei seemed to think I needed the most work there... but my new jutsu was awesome! And I could make it more awesome!

Hmm... in times like this, there was only one thing to do. I closed my eyes and reached into my pantry, pulling out a random cup of ramen. When I opened them again, I was holding a pork ramen. Pork was meat, and meat was more a taijutsu thing. Taijutsu it was.

**Level Up Complete!** **You need 6,998 experience points to achieve Level Seven.**

**Saving Progress...**

Once I had those points taken care of, I opened up my character profile thing again.

**Naruto Uzumaki – Genin**

**Level: 6**

**Threat Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 2/7,000**

**Teacher: Kakashi Hatake**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 7**

**Precision: 3**

**Toughness: 5**

**Vitality: 10 (15)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 0/1**

**Genjutsu: 0/6**

**Kenjutsu: 0/1**

**Ninjutsu: 27/31**

**Taijutsu: 6/11**

**Abilities: **

**Army of One (1)**

**Kage Bunshin Barrage (*)**

**Traits:**

**Kami's Luck**

**Jinchuuriki**

**Will of Fire**

**Will of Fire**

"... What? What happened to the skills? Why are they different now? And since when do I know kenjutsu?" I don't know why I even bothered asking anymore; I knew no one would answer. Still, if this changed, what else might have changed? I opened up the log next, to see what it had to say.

**Active Mission: None**

**Active Mission Details: N/A**

**Arc: Chuunin Exams**

**You have completed: **

**D-ranks: 15**

**C-ranks: 0**

**B-ranks: 0**

**A-ranks: 1**

**S-ranks: 0**

**Special Events: 4**

**You have unlocked: **

**Achievements: 4**

**Special Characters: 0**

**Special Missions: 1**

There was new stuff here too... although I still had no clue what it meant.

"Achievements?" I asked curiously.

**You have earned the following achievements:**

**Diligent Student**

**Fake Fake Out**

**Now That's Dedication... Or Something**

**This One's A Gimme**

"Diligent Student?"

**During the t*(^&%&cv^R3(d-)d45sdfF)(^5V^H **

I doubled over, clutching my head in pain as the words dissolved into something different and strange and just _wrong_.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked, my head pounding.

I really wanted to know what that achievement stuff meant, not to mention the rest of it, but I don't think my head could take another bout of... whatever that was right now. Sighing, I left the kitchen and decided to just call it a day.

I paused, looking around suspiciously; for a moment, I could have _sworn _I heard that laughter again.

* * *

><p>The next day I was called in to meet with Hokage-jiji. At first I thought my whole team would be there, but when I arrived it was just me, Kakashi-sensei, and the Hokage. Looks like I got to take another shot at convincing them I wasn't just making stuff up.<p>

Yay.

"What's up, jiji?" I asked politely, smiling.

He smiled back at me, motioning for me to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk.

"I wanted to ask about your mission, Naruto-kun. I heard from Kakashi here that things got somewhat out of hand."

"Nothin' I- I mean we couldn't handle!" I replied.

"Kakashi also pointed out that you played a vital role in the mission at several points. He is very proud of you, and I am as well."

I was grinning so hard my cheeks hurt, and my eyes stung a little as something got in them, but I'd never felt happier than at this moment... except for maybe when I got to carry Sakura-chan back from the bridge that one day.

This was a close second, though.

"He also mentioned that you had acquired some information about your opponents... Zabuza Momochi and his accomplice Haku, I believe it was. I'm quite curious how you managed to do that, and if you might have any other information that could help the village."

Crap. I had been hoping this wouldn't come up again after Kakashi-sensei didn't follow up on his promise that we would "talk" later, but it looks like it just got delayed instead.

"Uh...," I said, trying to buy myself some time. My mind didn't come up with anything, though, and I really didn't want to lie to Hokage-jiji anyway. "You won't believe me," I said finally, slumping in my chair slightly.

He just smiled warmly at me, his eyes crinkling as he chuckled. "My boy, I've been around for a very long time and I've seen and heard some very unbelievable things that were nonetheless true. Whatever it is you have to say, I don't think it will be _that _strange to me."

I drew in a deep breath, glancing over at Kakashi-sensei who was staring at me curiously. "I've lived through it before," I said.

The Hokage blinked at me, once. "I'm sorry Naruto-kun, I didn't quite catch that."

"I've lived through that mission before... four times, actually. The first time around we ended up fighting with Zabuza and I saw what Haku could do."

I saw the Hokage glance at Kakashi-sensei, who just shrugged.

"That... well, I suppose I _haven't _heard something like that before," the Hokage admitted. "Not that I doubt you, Naruto-kun, or think that you would lie to me about something like this...," he trailed off, staring at me sternly.

I chuckled nervously, recalling my few early attempts to prank the Hokage himself before I realized just how awesome he was, old or not.

"But do you perhaps have some way of proving this?"

"Nothing I haven't already tried," I admitted. "Every time this topic comes up, even when I have evidence like the stuff with Zabuza, you guys act like nothing happened the next day."

The Hokage and Kakashi-sensei exchanged another glance, much longer this time, and I saw a clear frown on Hokage-jiji's face. "Why the next day?" he asked gently.

"I don't know. Well, there is the fact that my new jutsu only works five times per day, so maybe something happens between today and tomorrow?"

"Your new jutsu?"

"I assume you mean the Kage Bunshin Barrage, right Naruto?" Kakashi-sensei asked.

"Yeah, that one. Sakura-chan figured out that I could only use it five times a day. I think it's because I put five points in it."

"I'm afraid you've lost me, Naruto-kun," the Hokage said. "Points?"

"Yeah, there's these weird floating words in my apartment, and sometimes 'Level Up' will be there. Every time that happens I can put one point in an ability." I saw the expression on the Hokage's face and just sighed. "You guys can't see them, you've been there before, so that won't work as proof either."

"Could you demonstrate this ability for me?"

"Well, I could, but I have to actually use it on somebody."

"I'm sure Kakashi won't mind, will you?"

"Of course, Hokage-sama," Kakashi-sensei replied as he raised his headband to expose his sharingan eye.

I shrugged and pointed at him. "Kage Bunshin Barrage."

Clones popped out of nowhere and jumped onto Kakashi, pummeling him into the ground. Despite the small hope that I had actually hit him this time, when the dust settled he was just sitting on the couch looking completely unruffled.

"That is skillful use of the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, Naruto-kun," the Hokage said, "but I didn't see anything unusual about the technique itself."

"Actually, Hokage-sama," Kakashi-sensei interrupted, "I _did _notice something strange; that technique didn't use any chakra."

The Hokage's eyes narrowed. "Really?"

Kakashi-sensei nodded firmly. "Absolutely none at all. To my sharingan, it looked like he just pointed at me and said the words."

The Hokage turned his attention back to me. "And you say you gained this ability from... floating words in your apartment?"

"I think the words are just a part of whatever is going on, but yeah," I nodded. I would have felt hopeful, as this was the farthest I'd ever gotten in convincing them that this was actually happening, but they'd still just forget by tomorrow anyway.

Hokage-jiji was silent for a few minutes, a thoughtful look on his face. Kakashi-sensei and I just waited. Eventually he opened his mouth to reply, then his eyes glazed over. I sighed, looking over at Kakashi-sensei and noticing that he looked much the same.

"Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Naruto-kun," he said. "I'll be sure to look into it, but for now you are dismissed."

I nodded, trudging out of the office. The first time I thought it was kinda weird, but other than confirming for me that _something _was going on – as if the fact that I kept reliving the same time period wasn't enough – it didn't really help my situation at all. At least that would be the end of the "How did you know that?" questions.

* * *

><p>After my meeting with the Hokage, I wandered around the village for a bit before deciding to test out my new ability. I wound up back at Training Ground Seven, in a tense standoff with the training logs.<p>

"Army of One!" I announced. If it worked like the Barrage and one point meant one use, I'd have to make this count. I felt that cold-water sensation and eagerly awaited whatever change was about to happen. Would it summon a single bad-ass clone? Would I suddenly get awesome muscles like Lee and Gai? Maybe get as fast as Kakashi-sensei? Maybe it would turn me into a not-old Hokage-jiji!

I kept waiting for several seconds before I frowned. I didn't feel any different, I didn't see any clones popping up, and I certainly wasn't growing awesome muscles or anything.

Maybe it wasn't a physical change, though. I pulled out a kunai and threw it at the log as hard as I could. It landed with a solid thunk, but it didn't sink any deeper into the log than I would have expected.

Maybe it was a ninjutsu thing? I threw another kunai, using my kunai clone technique, but while the wall of black showed up it didn't seem larger or thicker than before.

"What the hell?" I cried out, frustrated.

I punched and kicked and sliced and jutsu'd as hard as I could, but I couldn't tell any difference at all from before I used the new ability.

This sucked.

* * *

><p>The few weeks before the Chuunin Exams passed in a blur. I was starting to get really wound up for the coming confrontation in the Forest of Death – and that name was a little <em>too <em>appropriate now – and didn't pay much attention to what was going on.

I managed to run into Gaara and his team again – another of those things that always happened the same way no matter what – and once again thwarted that weird kidnapping attempt on Konohamaru. Through all of that I kept getting the weird feeling that I was missing something, but it wasn't until we got to the Academy to take the first exam that I realized what it was.

Lee had once again challenged Sasuke to a match – he never challenged me, even though I was sure I could put up a better fight – and they had moved to a more open area. I kept waiting for the bastard to turn on his stupid eyes, but he never did. I mean, every time he got them fighting Haku he-

…

Um.

This... might be a problem. Even I realized that Sasuke's funky eyes were a major factor in allowing us to survive as long as we did against Orochimaru. I really, really didn't want to see what would happen if things went even _worse _this time around.

Heck, even his stupid Lion Combo thing came from this fight against Lee – which he was losing badly, much to my enjoyment – and now he wouldn't have it.

I barely noticed moving into one of the classrooms and sitting down to take the test for the first part of the Exams. While everyone else was writing answers down frantically, I was focused on trying to figure out how we would manage to make it through the fight with Orochimaru without dying. I was rudely pulled out of my planning when Scarface yelled something about everyone having to make a decision.

"Give it a rest, old man!" I snapped, annoyed. I felt all eyes in the room focus on me, but I just stood up and slammed my hand on the desk.

"Like hell I'm going to back down over something like this! I'm going to get through this test no matter what! Believe it!"

* * *

><p>A few hours later we were deep in the forest and I was starting to jump at every gust of wind and creaking branch. The snake bastard was in here somewhere and he was coming for us.<p>

"Naruto...," Sakura-chan asked hesitantly. She still wasn't really talking to me, but she hadn't been fawning over Sasuke-teme as much as she used to either. I'd tried to cheer her up, but that just seemed to make things worse for some reason. As much as it hurt, though, I couldn't really afford to worry about it until after we got past Orochimaru.

_If _we got past Orochimaru.

"Yeah, Sakura-chan?"

"Are you... feeling alright? You seem, um, really nervous."

Normally I would have bragged about how tough I was, but not this time. "I am nervous," I admitted. "There's someone really, _really _dangerous in here, and I just know we're gonna have to fight him."

"Like you knew all that stuff about Zabuza and Haku?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah."

She looked pale and her hands were shaking a little bit. Even if my heart wasn't really in it, I couldn't just leave her scared like that.

"Don't worry, Sakura-chan," I said firmly. "No matter what, I won't let you get hurt. That's a-"

A howling gale tore through the clearing and slammed into me, flinging me through the trees. Stupid snake bastard just had to interrupt my conversation with Sakura-chan. Yet another reason to beat the shit out of him.

I took care of the giant snake - something that got easier and easier every time - and rushed back to my team as fast as I could.

"-haps there's hope for you after all," I heard as I approached. I saw Orochimaru holding Sasuke up by his throat, a sadistic grin on his face. I couldn't see Sakura-chan anywhere.

"Get away from him, you bastard!" I snarled as I charged forward. I'd barely made it three steps before something slammed into my side and tossed me against a tree. I shook my head to clear the ringing and turned to face my attacker, which turned out to be a clone of Orochimaru.

"I have no use for you, brat," the bastard hissed. "Stay out of my way."

"Like hell I will!" I growled. "I'm going to take your ass down!"

"Run," I heard Sasuke gasp, and I turned to look into his spinning red eyes. Huh, I guess he managed to turn them on even without his fight against Haku.

"No fucking way am I running, so just shut the hell up."

"You should learn to listen to your teammates; you might live longer."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I yelled, pointing at the Orochimaru holding Sasuke up. The clones jumped at him, but were almost instantly dispelled with absurd ease. I couldn't even see him moving, just clouds of smoke appearing all around him as the clones were destroyed.

Then his clone was attacking me again, and I took several strong hits before getting slammed into another tree. I was having a harder time clearing my head now; my vision was getting blurry and I could barely hear anything over the ringing in my ears. This fight wasn't going any better than the previous ones, even with my usage of Kage Bunshin Barrage.

I felt despair washing over me again as I realized that even with all of my effort and all my new abilities I still hadn't managed to do any better against Orochimaru. I was going to die, again, and everything I'd accomplished this time around would be gone: the new respect Kakashi-sensei and Sakura-chan had for me (even if Sakura-chan was acting a little odd right now); the fact that Zabuza and Haku had managed to survive; even Sasuke-teme acting a little less like a bastard than he normally did.

"Naruto Uzumaki is not a coward," I muttered. Orochimaru was staring at me with that smug smirk on his face, but I didn't care. "Naruto Uzumaki does not give up."

I had another move now, though, didn't I? Barrage wasn't working at all, but maybe _that_ would help. I had no clue what it did, but I was sure it did _something_.

"Naruto Uzumaki is an Army of One!" I shouted, climbing to my feet. I felt that cold water sensation again, so I knew it had worked. There were still things I hadn't tried, plans I hadn't even thought up yet. No way was I going down without a fight!

I turned my head to look at the real Orochimaru again, my hands coming up to form the handseal for the Kage Bunshin, but I froze when my gaze landed on something else: Sakura-chan, lying in a crumpled heap at the base of a tree.

She wasn't moving.

My world turned red.

* * *

><p><em>I found myself outside of my body again, just like when I was in my apartment and using the floating words. This time, though, the world wasn't gray, and my body was still moving around. It was also changing: my teeth were getting longer, the marks on my cheeks were turning much darker and thicker, and my eyes were now blood red with black slits in the middle. <em>

"Hey! What the hell is going on?" _I asked._

_No answer._

_I watched as my body launched itself forward, hands extended in claws – actually, my hands _had _claws now, my fingernails changing into something that wouldn't look out of place on a wolf... or a fox – and aiming for the clone. The clone backhanded me away; or rather, it tried to._

_The blow passed through my body as if it wasn't even there, and then my claws were ripping through the clone and it collapsed into a pile of dirt._

_My body landed in a crouch, head swinging from side to side for a moment, then threw its head back and let out a feral roar. I shuddered; that sound was far too bestial to have come out of a human mouth, and the fact that it was _me _just made it worse._

"_Oh? So you can use _that _power a little. Interesting...," Orochimaru said. Then his eyes narrowed. "But what was that you just did?"_

_Sasuke had managed to turn his head slightly, and was staring at me with wide, frightened eyes, his sharingan spinning madly._

_When my body heard Orochimaru's voice, it abruptly cut off the roar and then launched itself forward, all its attention focused on the bastard. Even as terrible and disturbing as this was to watch, I found myself hoping that I would manage to actually hurt him, at least a little._

_Orochimaru jumped to the side, dodging my attack easily while maintaining his grip on Sasuke. He flung a kunai at my back, but the blade just passed through me as if I wasn't even there, hitting the tree branch with a solid thunk._

"_Fascinating," Orochimaru said to himself. "I wonder, is this another power from your prisoner?"_

_He tilted his head back, reaching down his throat and pulling out his sword. I shuddered, remembering my last encounter with that sword and rubbing my neck at the phantom sensation of pain._

_As my body leapt towards Orochimaru again, he dodged once more and sliced at me with the blade. It passed through me yet again, but rather than looking put out or annoyed he just looked delighted._

"_There is no sensation of resistance at all! You are not impeded in the least by any attack. I wonder what the limits are...," he muttered to himself. He suddenly tossed Sasuke to the side, and I thought for a moment he was letting Sasuke go before another clone bled out of a tree and caught him._

_The original Orochimaru suddenly went on the offensive, jabbing and slashing at my body while it tried its hardest to sink its claws into him. I thought this would continue for a while, but a sudden spray of blood spewed into the air and my body jerked backwards as the sword ripped a bloody gash across its torso._

"_Ah, it ended so soon. A pity," Orochimaru said. He thrust the sword forward, sliding it through my gut and pinning me to a tree. I watched, horrified, as my body growled and threw itself forward along the sword, swiping at the snake bastard's face._

"_Kukuku... a feisty one, aren't you? Still, as amusing as this is, you aren't what I'm here for." He paused, a thoughtful expression on his face. "But you may be useful yet."_

_He pulled the sword out with a sharp jerk, then slammed his other hand into my gut._

* * *

><p>Pain roared through my body and I let out a scream. I felt unconsciousness creeping up on me, but I managed to raise my head up long enough to stare Orochimaru in the face.<p>

"Fuck. You," I choked out.

He didn't even spare me a glance as he turned and walked back towards Sasuke.

My world turned black.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Special double update this time, mostly because this chapter came pretty easily and I want to move things along a little faster.  
><strong>

**I have updated the Manual as well; you can find a "Change Log" section near the top that will point out what was changed and added. Thanks to my reviewers, especially Burn Note, who have asked questions and offered suggestions that really helped me refine the rules.**

**My first instinct was to just retcon the earlier chapters, but then I thought about how updates can sometimes change the rules out from under the players, and it occurred to me that I could do that just as easily here, and that it could become an additional piece of the story rather than more work to maintain. And, given some of the other things about how the game is run... well, it's hardly the worst thing I will do to Naruto (or have done, for that matter).**

**Reincarnation and Gene Splicing (originally Transmigration) were inspired by Disgaea and Etrian Odyssey. Both excellent games, if in rather different genres.  
><strong>

**"I wouldn't lie in a situation like this!' - That gets funnier every time I read it. It's just so... _Naruto._  
><strong>

**I can easily see Naruto making all difficult decisions with ramen-divination.**

**Decided to add achievements after all. Most of them will be there to record some of the crazier things Naruto will pull off, but I'll be using some of them later on as hints for alternative paths or hidden parts of the "game".**

**Fic Recommendation: Naruto vs Zombies, by Crisis - It's just getting off the ground, but has already been quite amusing and rather creative in how it merged the two settings. I'm looking forward to reading more.**

**If anyone has any other video game fic recommendations, feel free to PM me.**

**Edit: 03/24/2012 - tweaked the Kunai Kage Bunshin scene, tweaked the "Army of One" scene, and added an earlier scene where he tries to test it out.  
><strong>


	4. Life Five: Ninja Kombat

I blinked.

I stared in silence at... tree roots? Wasn't I supposed to be back at Ichiraku Ramen now?

"They … oaches!"

Huh? Who was that talking?

"You made a … our team and... you're going to pay for that!

I blinked again, trying to figure out what was going on. I turned my head to the side, noting that a damp cloth slid off of my head as I did so. Sasuke-teme was lying next to me, some sort of weird smoke coming off of his neck.

I sat up slowly, holding my stomach to ward off the pain... only there was no pain. If I hadn't died, shouldn't I have a sword wound in my gut? And if I did die again, shouldn't I be back at Ichiraku's?

And come to think of it, what was with all the bandages? My stomach and chest were covered in multiple layers, enough that it was actually a little difficult to move. Still no pain, though.

I looked to the side, noting that Sasuke-teme was awake and sitting up too, a harsh glare on his face.

"If you are going to go any further, I'm going all out," I heard someone say. That voice was familiar, and it kinda ticked me off for some reason.

I followed Sasuke's line of sight, and saw Sakura-chan... alive! The Snake-bastard didn't kill her after all! Then I took note of her condition; she had blood and bruises all over and she looked completely exhausted. A snarl found its way onto my face, and I exchanged a quick glance with Sasuke; for once, we were thinking the same thing.

"If you don't like it so much, then stop acting cool and come down here!" I heard someone else say.

"It seems that won't be necessary..." the first voice said. I recognized it now, but I heard more important things to worry about than that asshole cousin of Hinata's.

"Sasuke-kun! Naruto-kun! You guys are awake!"

I stood completely, stretching my arms and cracking my neck and fists. Beside me, Sasuke slouched forward, those weird markings covering his body. I knew they were supposed to be bad somehow, but I had more important things to worry about than that, too.

"Sakura...," Sasuke said darkly, "who did that to you?"

"Sasuke-kun?" Sakura-chan said hesitantly, looking worried.

"Come on, teme, it should be obvious," I interrupted. "We've got three people from Sound here, and they all look like they're just begging for an ass-kicking."

Sasuke glanced at me, smirking. "You _do _say smart things sometimes, dobe," he said.

"Yeah, we did it!" one of the Sound-nin said, confirming that they really _were _begging for it.

"Sasuke-kun... your body... and Naruto! You need to rest! You were- were..." Sakura-chan trailed off, her eyes watering.

"Don't worry about me, Sakura-chan!" I said, smiling widely. "It'll take more than one dumbass snake bastard to stop me!"

"Says the one who got nailed to a tree," Sasuke chuckled.

"Like you were doing any better," I scoffed. "At least _I _managed to hit him."

"Managed to _bleed _on him, maybe."

I opened my mouth to retort again, then shook myself. "We'll finish this later, teme. Right now we've got idiots to take care of."

"Hn. Fine," he grunted. "Now then, it was you guys, right?" he muttered, turning back to the Sound team.

"Ino, this is bad! You'll get caught up! Return to your body! You too, Chouji! We're hiding!" Shikamaru shouted as he darted out of the way, carrying Ino's limp body with him.

Sasuke hunched over, his chakra flaring even higher. He seemed to be focused on the bandaged one, so I decided to go after the other male Sound-nin.

"Dosu! No need to be afraid of this half-dead freak!" my target shouted as he clasped his hands together.

"I don't think so," I snarled. "Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I snapped, pointing at him.

"Ulti-" he started to say, before my clones appeared before him. One mule-kicked him in the jaw, snapping his head back and launching him in the air. The others bounced him back and forth in the air as they called out the name of the technique. The final blow planted him back on the ground. For once, an enemy hit with that move actually stayed down.

"I guess that means you're mine...," Sasuke said lowly, stalking towards the Sound-nin covered in bandages.

"W-wait!" he called out, pulling out a scroll. "We know we can't beat you, so just take this and-"

"Shut up," Sasuke said as he appeared next to him and backhanded him into a tree. There was a loud cracking sound as the Sound-nin bounced off and landed on the ground. I blinked when Sasuke tossed the scroll to me; I hadn't even noticed him take it.

"Hold onto that, dobe," he said, then advanced towards the downed genin again.

The Sound-nin was staggering to his feet, his movements almost drunken as he listed to one side. "We surrender!" he managed to get out.

"Don't care," Sasuke retorted darkly as he pulled out a pair of kunai.

"Hey, bastard!" I shouted.

The more I watched this, the more I felt that this was just _wrong. _I knew what Sasuke was about to do, and something told me that I would regret it if I didn't stop him. I chucked the scroll at his head, and he ducked to the side, blinking in confusion.

"I'm not your pack-mule!" I continued. "You can carry that yourself! And you know what else? I don't like your face!"

The entire clearing was silent as everyone stared at me, even Sasuke. I knew it was working, though, because I saw a smirk growing on his face that replaced the scowl that had been there before.

"Is that so, dead last?" he said, turning his attention to me and beginning to stalk forward. Well, almost; he tossed the kunai he had in his hands at the Sound-nin, one sinking into his shoulder and the other into his leg.

Meh, good enough. He didn't kill the guy, and that was all that I was after.

"Yeah! And you know what else?" I yelled, stalking towards him and grinning widely. "Kage Bunsh-"

"Stop it!" Sakura-chan yelled, cutting me off and causing Sasuke-teme to stumble to a halt. "Just... stop," she trailed off, panting.

My eyes darted back and forth between Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme, and I slowly relaxed as I saw the weird markings on his body disappearing. As much as I wanted to punch him in the face – not for any particular reason, he just had it coming – now wasn't the time.

"Sorry, Sakura-chan," I said sheepishly.

Sasuke-teme just grunted and turned around. The Sound-nin whimpered and tried to scramble backwards, but Sasuke just walked past him to pick up the scroll I had thrown earlier.

"This makes both scrolls, right?"

"Yep!" I said, grinning. We had this exam in the bag!

I turned to Sakura-chan, then blinked. I don't know how I'd missed it before, but Sakura-chan's hair was barely hanging down to her shoulders, where before it had fallen partway down her back.

"Hey, Sakura-chan... did you do something with your hair?"

* * *

><p>The other teams eventually left, even the Sound team managing to crawl out of the clearing. I felt a little bad for them, but they did beat up Sakura-chan, so really they should be happy I didn't do anything worse to them.<p>

We made pretty good time to the Tower after that. Iruka-sensei appeared when we opened the summoning scrolls, and he seemed really proud that our team had made such good time. He even promised to treat me to ramen once the second phase was over!

Kakashi-sensei appeared out of nowhere right after that and hauled us all off to the part of the Tower reserved for med-nin. Even I could tell that he was tense, but he was quickly relaxing as the doctors looked us over. The one helping Sasuke-teme was focused on his neck for some reason – probably looking at whatever Snake-face had done to him – while the one helping Sakura was giving her pills to swallow while gently moving her head back and forth and looking into her eyes for some reason.

The one helping me was gently unwrapping the bandages, but paused when he was finished and just looked at me, a confused expression on his face.

"Uzumaki-san," the guy said, "did you not sustain severe wounds to your torso and abdomen?"

"Abdiwhat?"

"... stomach."

"Oh. Yeah, Snake-face got me good a couple of times, but I'm fine now. It's like I got healed up overnight."

The med-nin twitched when I said that, and spent the next few minutes poking and prodding me everywhere while muttering to himself. Eventually, they decided that all of us were fine – _I _could have told them that – and let us leave.

Kakashi-sensei took Sasuke-teme off somewhere right after that, but he did take the time to tell us how proud he was that we were the third team to make it to the tower, which was awesome. If I remembered right we'd actually been the last team to show up the first time through.

Once they left, Sakura and I made our way to the room that we would be staying in for the next few days. It was kinda on the small side, but it did have three decent-sized beds as well as its own bathroom. Sakura-chan and I claimed our beds and dumped Sasuke-teme's stuff on his, then just kicked back and relaxed.

So it was just me and Sakura-chan.

Alone.

In a room.

"Naruto...," Sakura-chan said slowly.

"Y-yes?" I gulped nervously, my heart pounding in my chest.

"How... how did you know?"

"Huh?" I asked, feeling my nervousness give way to confusion. "Know about what?"

"That Orochimaru would attack us in the forest. Or even that Zabuza and Haku would attack us in Wave. How?"

"Oh. Uh... gut instinct?"

She just _looked _at me, and I felt guilt gnawing at my stomach. "Do you not trust me enough to tell me the truth?"

"It's not that!" I said immediately, waving my hands in the air. "It's just... it... you won't believe me."

"_Something _is going on," she said firmly, staring at me. "I just want to know what it is... before one of us ends up dying."

It was a little late for that, actually, but I didn't say that out loud.

I stared at her, her green eyes boring into my eye, and I finally closed my eyes and sighed in defeat. "I know because I've lived through it before... several times. The bell test, the Wave mission, the Chuunin Exams... all of it. That's how."

I kept my eyes closed, waiting for her response. Several seconds passed and she didn't say anything, so I finally opened my eyes. Her head was bowed and her entire body was trembling.

"Sakura-chan?" I asked hesitantly.

Her head snapped up to reveal her angry face. "Naruto-baka!" she snapped. "If you're going to lie, at least make up something believable, **shannaro!**" She stomped past me and towards the door, still muttering under her breath.

"But...," I protested, but she had already left.

* * *

><p>Things managed to get even more awkward with Sakura-chan after that and Sasuke-teme seemed to be asleep most of the time, so I took to wandering the tower out of sheer boredom. Of course, I was doing it while walking on the walls and ceilings; Kakashi-sensei said I needed to keep working on my chakra control, after all. I really needed it, too, because I seemed to be having a much harder time of it now for some reason. Maybe I was still recovering from what Snake-face had done to me?<p>

I found out Gaara was in the tower quickly – he seemed to be following me around a lot, because every time I turned around there he was, staring at me and muttering to himself. It was fucking creepy as hell. I knew more about why he was like that, now, but still...

I experimented with Army of One as much as I could, but since I only had one point in it I could only use it once a day. The first thing I tried was to use it with one of my clones, but just like Barrage it didn't work. After that I had my clones attack me until they actually managed to hit me, and I found out that it only works for ten hits... I think. I tried to come up with other things to try like Sakura-chan had, but I only had one shot per day and I didn't know what would actually work or not.

I did know that every time I tried it stopped exactly ten hits though, so I'm pretty sure that much at least I got right. I'd been worrying about other things at the time, but that seemed like how many times Orochimaru tried to hit me, too.

I didn't have any way to check to see if I had leveled up or if anything in the Log had changed, either, so I was really on edge when the prelims finally rolled around.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Kakashi-sensei... are these matches really random?" I asked as I watched Shikamaru fight the girl from the Sound team.<p>

"Of course they are," Kakashi-sensei replied immediately, not bothering to look up from his book. "You can see the names as they are randomly chosen on the board, just like everyone else."

I grumbled to myself, crossing my arms and huffing in annoyance. I mean, yeah, I could see the board – I wasn't _blind _– but I would swear that all of these matches were _exactly the same. _I didn't mean just the same people fighting, either. It looked like most of them were happening exactly the same way on top of that.

The only big difference I'd noticed so far was that Sakura-chan actually won her fight against Ino. I'd cheered her on like crazy and congratulated her when she won, but she just gave me an odd look before settling down against the wall to rest.

So, with nearly everything else the same, if I ended up fighting Kiba again...

"Next match, *cough* Naruto Uzu*cough*maki versus Kiba Inuzuka *cough*!" Cough-guy announced. I'm sure he was a nice guy and all, but they must have realized that he made a bad announcer and replaced him, since he wasn't there for the Third Phase. Good call, in my opinion.

"Heh heh... we're lucky, boy! This'll be an easy win!" Kiba boasted to Akamaru.

"In your dreams, dog breath," I yelled back. "I won't even need to use Army o- er, my new jutsu on you!"

Kiba and I faced off in the arena, Kiba posing arrogantly while I confidently waited for the start of the match.

"Begin!" Cough-guy said.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I said, pointing at Kiba. He was immediately swarmed with clones, all of them punching and kicking away. Kiba was eventually flung out of the mass of them, rolling to a stop a couple of meters away before he climbed back to his feet.

"I thought you said you weren't going to use your new jutsu," he growled, wiping blood off of his busted lip.

"My _other _new jutsu," I said, grinning. "This'll be more than enough for you."

"Like I'm just going to let you hit me again," Kiba growled, crouching. "Your new jutsu won't mean shit if I dodge it."

"Kage Bunshin Barrage," I said again, smirking.

One clone appeared directly in front of Kiba, ready to mule-kick him, but it... missed? The fuck? That had never happened before! I watched in disbelief as my clones continued to attack empty air while Kiba spun out of the way. I shook that off and prepared to fight him hand-to-hand as he charged in.

"Now!" he shouted abruptly, and I felt something slam into my back, knocking me forward and off-balance. Kiba was on me a moment later, snapping off a quick combo that ended in a roundhouse kick, launching me back towards the wall.

"And that's why you're the dead last," Kiba mocked, cracking his knuckles.

I stood slowly, brushing imaginary dust off of my clothing. I watched as his grin faltered, my own growing in response. "Was that supposed to hurt, dog breath? _Sasuke-teme _hits harder than you do."

It really hadn't hurt, I thought, surprised. Kiba had packed a serious punch the first time around, but for some reason he was a lot weaker now. Or, I corrected myself, _I_ was a lot stronger. My grin grew even wider as I realized that all those levels and skill points really _were _doing something. I just had to measure myself against people like Kiba instead of crazy-strong people like Zabuza and Orochimaru.

I didn't bother using Kage Bunshin Barrage after that; I wanted to see how well my taijutsu was doing after all the training Kakashi-sensei put me through. I kept pushing Kiba, not giving him any room or time to coordinate with Akamaru. He was still more skilled than me, but it was a lot closer than either of us would have expected.

He got in three or four hits for every one I landed, but I barely felt the blows while he staggered under each of mine. Akamaru kept trying to come in from behind, but he was actually rather predictable and I swatted him away without too much trouble every time he tried.

Kiba went down a minute later, unconscious, and Akamaru just stayed at his side, whining and licking Kiba's face. A few seconds later, Cough-guy called the match.

"Winner, Naru*cough*to Uzumaki!" he announced.

Damn, that felt good. I began walking back to the balcony when I heard the next fight announced.

"The next match will be Neji Hyuuga versus Hinata Hyuuga."

In my concern about all the fights turning out the same and then my battle with Kiba, I'd forgotten about what happened afterward. If _this _fight turned out the same, then Hinata would spend most of the next month in the hospital because her cousin had tried to kill her.

I rushed up the steps, making a beeline for Hinata who was just starting down. She froze when she saw me approaching, her face burning a bright red and one hand clutching the railing tightly.

"Hinata, about this fight," I started, then trailed off. What was I going to say? He's going to try to kill you? Give up? Don't fight?

"Y-yes?" she asked hesitantly.

If someone said that to me, I'd tell them to go fuck themselves. Hinata was way too nice to say something like that, but she'd probably be thinking it really hard. Besides, she had the same _nindo _as me, she didn't deserve someone telling her to give up.

"Kick his ass!" I grinned, giving her a thumbs up.

"Y-yes!" she said, startled, then gasped and clapped her hands over her mouth. "I- I mean-"

I cut her off, laughing. "Go on, Hinata-chan! Show him what you can do!"

She nodded in response, a small smile on her face, then resumed walking down the stairs.

I rejoined my team, Sasuke and Sakura-chan both giving me strange looks before focusing on the upcoming match. Kakashi-sensei walked up to me and clapped one hand on my shoulder.

"Good job, Naruto. I'm impressed."

I grinned up at him. "No problem, Kakashi-sensei! Kiba didn't have a chance against me!"

"Ah, yes, that too," he said, grinning at me.

"... huh? What else were you talking about?"

He chuckled to himself, turning back to reading his book while leaning on the railing.

I shook off his odd words and focused on the match down below. Neji was currently telling Hinata to give up, and she was going to say-

"Be quiet and fight, Neji-nii-san!" Hinata yelled suddenly. She looked just as surprised as I felt, but then her face tightened and she stared back at him defiantly.

My jaw dropped in shock as I stared down at her, then I burst out laughing.

"You tell him, Hinata-chan!" I cheered.

Neji's face reddened, and he didn't say anything further as he dropped into a stance. I suddenly felt nervous for a reason I didn't fully understand.

"Begin!" Cough-guy called out.

Neji launched himself forward, and I understood the source of that feeling immediately. I remembered the awe-inspiring display they had put on the first time around, appearing to be evenly matched as they traded blows back and forth. It was only after numerous exchanges that Neji revealed that he had been sealing off her tenketsu the entire fight.

That... didn't happen this time.

Instead, Neji's attack slammed through Hinata's guard and into her body, actually knocking her backwards half a step. He didn't ease up, either, each attack blasting through Hinata's attempts to deflect or block. In fifteen seconds he had her backed up against the wall, and three seconds after that she was down on the ground, unconscious.

I felt something stab into my hand, and looked down to find that the metal railing had crumpled under my grip, one of the edges of the twisted metal slicing into my palm. I clenched my fist as I returned my gaze to the pit, where Neji was frowning and rubbing his arm while staring down at Hinata's fallen form.

The entire arena was silent for several seconds before Cough-guy cleared his throat and called out, "Winner, Neji Hyuuga."

Neji scoffed and walked away, not even bothering to look back at her as he ascended the steps. He glanced in my direction, his pupiless white eyes boring into my own, before he scoffed again and turned to rejoin his team.

I think I hated him even more this time around than I did the first time.

My attention was pulled back to Hinata, where a medical team was checking her over. They seemed pretty relaxed and unhurried, though, nothing like the frantic shouting from when Neji had tried to kill her. One of them used a medical jutsu on her for a few seconds, then they loaded her up on the stretcher and carried her out of the arena. Maybe, despite how brutal that had looked, she was actually in better shape this time?

"The next fight *cough* is between Rock *cough* Lee and Gaara!"

Oh, shit. I'd forgotten about _this _fight too! I didn't have time to warn Lee, either, because he was already down in the arena.

"Uh, Kakashi-sensei?" I said, staring down into the arena as the battle began.

"Hmm?" he replied. He'd actually put away his book and was watching the fight closely.

"You know that Gaara's, um, not exactly all there, right?"

"Hmm," he said. "I may have picked up on that, what with all the death threats and random bursts of killing intent."

"... yeah. Well, Lee's awesome and all, but there's a chance he could get really hurt in this fight. Like, crippled for life hurt."

Kakashi-sensei turned to look at me, his expression serious. "Yes, there is," he said.

"Then!"

"Naruto," he interrupted me. "this is a lesson that every ninja must learn sometime in their career. People will get hurt. Your _friends _will get hurt. Maybe even die." He paused for a moment, then continued. "It's a part of life, and an all too common one for ninja. The only thing you can do is learn to deal with it, and get as strong as you possibly can so that you can protect those you care about."

My eyes widened, my respect for Kakashi-sensei soaring even higher. He knew about precious people too!

"Do you understand?" he asked quietly.

I nodded solemnly. "But, what can I do to help Lee?"

"Well, you _could _interrupt the fight. It would cause him to lose, and you would forfeit your own right to continue, but it would keep him safe."

I frowned. "I'd be pissed if someone did that to me," I replied.

He nodded. "Yes, I imagine you would." He returned his attention to the fight, where Lee had just dropped his weights and was starting to run rings around Gaara. "That's another lesson that you have to learn," he continued. "Sometimes, trying to keep someone safe just ends up driving them away."

"But... there's got to be another way!" I said urgently. Lee had launched Gaara into the air and appeared behind him. It was going to happen soon.

Kakashi-sensei nodded. "There is." He turned to face me again, smiling. "You teach them to be strong on their own."

In that moment, I felt as if I really, truly understood Kakashi-sensei. The words resonated through my mind, striking a chord deep within. I could feel the idea taking hold and spawning even more ideas.

Then Gaara crushed Lee's arm and leg with his sand.

* * *

><p>That was pretty rough, even though Gai-sensei saved Lee again. I really hoped someone would be able to fix him up properly. It was after that, though, that things started getting a little weird.<p>

Chouji fought against the bandaged Sound guy that Sasuke-teme had done a number on, and he won too. That was pretty awesome, but then I noticed that the _random _board thingy was selecting another set of names.

"The next match *cough* is between Naru*cough*to Uzumaki and Shino *cough* Aburame."

I blinked in confusion. "Huh? Wasn't that the last fight?"

Kakashi-sensei shook his head. "Only eight competitors are allowed in the finals, so the matches will continue until only eight are left. Someone was always going to have to fight twice."

"But- that- last time when- they- argh! Forget it!" I yelled in frustration as I marched down into the arena.

I really wanted to go make sure Lee and Hinata were ok, and this had definitely _not _happened last time. I set that aside, though, as I faced off across from Shino, grinning at him confidently. After taking out Kiba so easily, I was more than ready to take him on. Stupid rules changes or not, I was more than willing to show everyone what I could do.

"Begin!" Cough-guy announced.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I snapped immediately. The clones swarmed him, kicking and punching at will, and I nodded in satisfaction... until they started dispersing a moment later. It wasn't supposed to wear off that fast... was it?

The smoke left from the clones cleared away, revealing the beaten and bruised form of... no one? All he could make out were a few black specks on the floor.

It's always a bad thing when I lose sight of my opponent, so I immediately spun around, finger raised and ready to use Barrage. I was a little slow, because Shino was already in my face and punching. He hit much harder than Kiba, but he wasn't quite as fast.

He was also better at taijutsu than either me or Kiba, 'cause I was having a hard time hitting him. What was worse, every time I would start to say the name of my technique he would either punch me in the gut or in the face, more than hard enough to disrupt my speech.

Then, when I finally managed to land a solid blow, he dissolved into a bunch of insects that latched onto me.

"What the hell?" I yelled out as I tried to scrape the bugs off of me.

"I have seen everything you can do, Uzumaki-san," Shino said as he appeared in front of me.

"Your battle with Kiba was most instructive," another Shino said from the side.

"Your style blends surprise attacks with endurance," said yet another Shino.

"You have grown stronger," admitted still another Shino.

"But you cannot win," added the next Shino that appeared.

"You cannot win."

"You cannot win."

"You cannot win."

More and more Shinos appeared, all of them repeating that last statement. Soon the whole arena was packed with them, all of them focused on me and constantly repeating themselves.

It was pissing me off.

"You think I'm scared of numbers?" I yelled at him. "Naruto Uzumaki is an Army of One! Believe it! Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

I poured a lot more chakra than I normally would into the technique, and dozens of clones appeared standing in the arena. As one, they all turned and attacked the closest Shino clone. A few Shinos dissolved into bugs, most of them turned out to be basic clones, but a few turned out to be traps. The moment those clones attacked, they found the floor underneath them dropping away as they fell into pits and then the floor closing over them a moment later, trapping them.

"So that was your plan, huh? That's not going to stop me! I'll-"

"I surrender," one of the Shinos said calmly.

"I'll... I'll... huh?" I asked, confused. Even as I stared at him, all the insects clinging to my form detached and flowed back towards him. I didn't mind bugs much normally, but there were a _lot _of those things.

"My strategy has failed, and despite my bugs draining your chakra continuously it does not seem to be effecting you as I predicted it would. Further, in this confined space, I lack the means to counter your numerous solid clones."

"Winner: Na*cough*ruto Uzumaki!" Cough-guy announced.

"Uh... right," I said finally. I slowly made my way back to the balcony where the other teams were waiting. As I did so, I watched the board out of the corner of my eye. I winced in sympathy when I saw the next set of names.

"The final match is-"

"Forfeit!" Kankuro yelled out, actually looking – and sounding – slightly panicked. I couldn't blame him; I wouldn't want to up against Gaara at all, especially when he looked as pissed off as he did right now. Of course, I would win – I already beat his ass once, after all – but it still sucked... and technically I hadn't survived it, had I?

I paused, frowning. Come to think of it, what _did _kill me? It can't have been Gaara, who was on the ground and screaming at me to stay away like I was going to kill him or something. Sasuke and Sakura were nearby, but neither one of them would have done something like that. Who else was there? Something really sharp had slammed into my back, and then... nothing. I was back at Ichiraku's immediately afterward.

Whatever it was, I knew to watch out for it now. I shook myself and got into line with the other genin who had made it past the prelims and we all took turns drawing lots.

"The first match will be Naruto Uzumaki versus Neji Hyuuga," one of the assistants announced, "the second match will be Sasuke Uchiha versus Gaara of the Sand, the third match will be Sakura Haruno versus Chouji Akimichi, and the last match will be Shikamaru Nara versus Temari of the Sand."

Huh... everyone who had made it last time were fighting the same people, and Sakura and Chouji, who hadn't made it last time, were facing off against each other. That seemed a little odd...

Eh, whatever. I still got to pound Neji's face in, so it was all good.

* * *

><p>"Hey! Hey! Kakashi-sensei!" I yelled out as I caught up to him. "What are we going to do for training between now and the finals?"<p>

Kakashi sighed, actually closing his book as he turned to face me. "Normally we would continue meeting as a team, but this situation is a little unusual. As such, teachers have been arranged for each of you. Sasuke will be out on a training trip with me so I can help him master his sharingan and work on his affinity.

"As for you, due to... well, this and that, a specialist will be taking over your training for the time being." He suddenly loomed forward, one hand clamping onto my shoulder as he fixed me with a serious gaze. "Don't worry too much, Naruto," he said reassuringly, "it'll all be over soon."

I swallowed nervously, telling myself that I wasn't at all worried about how he'd said that. "It doesn't matter who it is!" I said as firmly as I could manage. "They won't get the best of Naruto Uzumaki! Believe it!"

"That's the way, Naruto," Kakashi said softly, patting my shoulder. "Always keep a positive attitude, even in the face of- well, anyway," he said abruptly, straightening up and pulling out his book again, "I actually have to leave soon, but Team Seven has no official duties until the end of the Chuunin Exams. Make the best of what time you have left."

"What about Sakura-chan?" I asked curiously.

"Oh, I talked to her earlier and she's decided to study on her own. She _may _have mentioned that she'd be tracking you down later, though, for some _private _training sessions," he added, giggling perversely. "I didn't know you had it in you."

"Uh... thanks?" I replied, confused.

With one last wave and another giggle, he disappeared.

I rubbed my chin as I turned and started heading back to my apartment. I wasn't stuck with Closet-Pervert this time, which was great, but I'd already checked the bathhouse and Ero-sennin wasn't there yet. So who was I supposed to be training with?

I shivered. And why was Kakashi-sensei talking like I was going to die or something?

My mind kept running in circles as I opened the door to my apartment and stepped inside. I'd barely gotten the door closed before kunai were flying out of nowhere and pinning me to the door face-first. None of them had hit me dead on, but basically all of them had managed to nick me as they pierced my clothing, and one had even cut a long line down my cheek, just like-

Oh, no.

_Noooo_nonono.

Kakashi-sensei wasn't that much of a bastard, was he? We'd been bonding lately, right? He wouldn't do something like this to me, right?

"So, brat, I hear you managed to hold off that piece of shit Orochimaru for a little while in the forest. Dusted one of his clones, even," Crazy Snake Lady purred in my ear. "By the time I'm done with you, you'll be doing a lot more than that."

He really was that much of a bastard.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I did end up making some minor adjustments to canon to simplify things. Team Seven doesn't have to spend the next few days searching for the second scroll, and the prelims narrow down the field to eight from the get go. **

**Next chapter will be training with Anko, Jiraiya, and some chats with Hinata and Sakura, as well as a bit more research into the abilities he has. He's starting to experiment on his own, and he'll get better at it eventually. The chapter after that will hit the Chuunin Exams, and might possibly get all the way through to the end.**

**Ten points to the first person to correctly guess the who, how, and why of whoever killed Naruto the first time around.**

**I've had a request to do some polls relating to this story. I normally avoid those because I generally have a pretty clear plan for where I want the story to go. However, being a video game story, there's a lot more flexibility available for this.**

**So, I will be posting a poll on my profile shortly that will run for two+ weeks, and I'll try to come up with something for each chapter (although that's not to say the poll result will show up in the next chapter).**

**I have certain people earmarked to be recruited by Naruto early on. This poll will determine one other person that will get added to the "game". Or, if one of the people already joining wins the poll, I'll write an extra scene or two for that character. I'll just say one other thing in regards to the poll: Suikoden.**

**Depending on how this one works out, polls of this type may crop up from time to time, since Naruto could technically recruit anyone in the Naruto-verse if he put his mind to it. The more common poll type will be regarding skill selections, traits and the like.**

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**

**Edit: 04-25-2012 – added a scene where Team Seven undergoes a medical exam after they arrive in the tower. Expanded the fight scene with Kiba slightly to account for Akamaru.**

**Also, since a lot of people are asking for "game" information as Naruto moves through the story, I will be adding a snapshot at the end of each chapter for major events that happened. This sort of information may or may not show up within the text of the story itself at some point (aside from when he's checking the log).**

**From the last time Naruto checked the Log: **

**XP: 4,213/7,000**

**New Achievements: **

**'Tis But A Flesh Wound (20) – Survived the first encounter with Orochimaru with less than 5% HP remaining.**

**Guts Would Be Proud (5) – Found a character's Berserk Button.**

**Two For The Price Of One (10) – Face and defeat two opponents during the Chuunin Exam's preliminary round.**

**I Didn't Sign Up For This! (10) **–** Unlocked Teacher: Anko Mitarashi.  
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**(end)**

**I may or may not do anything with the achievement points, but for right now they're just a relative gauge of how difficult/unusual a particular achievement is.**


	5. Life Five: Dynasty Ninjas

"So, uh... thanks for the help? That lesson on checking my apartment for intruders was really helpful, but I'm sure you're super busy and everything, so...," I babbled.

Crazy Snake Lady just smirked at me. "Nice try, brat. Now move your ass."

She hadn't even given me time to check on my stats or anything; she'd just pushed me out of my apartment and directed me towards one of the training grounds. The ninja we met along the way gave us wide berth and shot me amused or pitying looks.

"So, uh, what exactly are we going to be doing?"

She grinned at me. "I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise."

That didn't make me feel much better. I kept trying to get her to tell me what she had planned, but she just kept laughing at me or shaking her head.

Finally, we reached one of the training grounds and she had me stand across from her in the middle of a clearing.

"Alright, first thing we're going to do is go over every single thing you did against the shithead."

I stared at her blankly.

"_Orochimaru_," she ground out. "What did you do in your fight against him?"

"Oh! Uh... there wasn't a whole lot to it, actually," I admitted. "I just kinda... caught him by surprise."

She gave me a flat look that made me feel insulted and stupid at the same time. "_Right_," she said. "Now, what did you do?"

I scratched the back of my head. It wasn't like I hadn't thought about that fight at all, but I'd already used Army of One today, so I couldn't show her what I actually did.

"I have this new jutsu that lets me... uh, sort of avoid attacks," I tried to explain. "I can only use it once a day though, and I already used it against Shino."

She frowned at me, but seemed willing to accept that for the moment. "Fine, we'll deal with that tomorrow. That can't be all of it, though."

I shuffled uncomfortably. "I... kinda got angry when I saw Sakura-chan lying at the base of that tree. I thought she had... died." Again, I added to myself.

Her eyes narrowed as she studied me carefully. "_How _angry, exactly?"

I rubbed my stomach where the seal was, not looking at her directly. "Very."

"Has that happened before?" she asked, her eyes boring into me as if she was daring me to try to lie to her.

"Once or twice, but nothing like this," I admitted.

"What brought you out of it?" she pressed.

"Uh... he stabbed his sword through my stomach – actually, wait. It was after that. He pulled the sword out and stabbed his fingers into my gut. Immediately after that I snapped out of... whatever it was I was in."

I must have blinked or something, because one moment Crazy Snake Lady was standing several feet away from me and the next my shirt had been pulled over my head.

"What the hell?" I yelled, flailing my arms.

Her fingers jabbed me several times, and suddenly my arms were hanging limp at my sides. "Shut up and be still," she snapped, sounding distracted.

"Why? What are you doing to me?"

"Shut it!" she snarled, leaking a bit of killing intent.

I snapped my mouth closed and swallowed nervously.

A few seconds later she had yanked my shirt back down. I think I preferred the shirt up, though, because she was in my face and looking absolutely furious. "You let that piece of shit mess with your seal and didn't say anything about it? Are you fucking insane?"

"W-what? What did he do?"

I thought she would explain, but she just grabbed me and all of a sudden I felt the world lurching around me. That happened several more times before I found myself standing outside of a very familiar door. Crazy Snake Lady was saying something, but my head was still spinning and I couldn't quite make it out.

When my head finally cleared, my shirt was pulled over my head again and someone was poking at my stomach. "Hey, quit that!" I yelled. I tried to flail my arms again, but they still weren't listening to me.

"I'm sorry about all this Naruto-kun, but this is a very serious situation," I heard Hokage-jiji say.

Well, if it was the old man I wasn't going to worry about it too much. He knew what he was doing.

He kept poking my stomach for about a minute, then he said. "This might sting a bit, Naruto-kun."

I didn't even have time to ask what he was talking about before he stabbed his fingers into my gut. The air whooshed out of my lungs and I had trouble catching my breath for a few seconds.

"What was that for, jiji?" I complained. They lowered my shirt again and I saw the old man standing before me, looking unamused.

"Orochimaru tampered with your seal, Naruto-kun. Fortunately it wasn't anything destructive, but it must have affected your chakra control and access to the Kyuubi's chakra," he explained. He focused on me, his expression serious. "Why did you not report this, Naruto-kun?"

"Uh... I didn't actually know he'd done anything," I muttered. "I thought my chakra control was a little off, but I just assumed it was because I was still recovering from my wounds."

The old man nodded after a few moments. "Very well. In the future, if you ever think your chakra control has been affected _for any reason_, please notify either myself or your instructor immediately. Even if you think it's just your imagination. Do you promise?"

"Yeah, I promise, jiji," I replied, frowning. Did Snake-Face do that to me the first time? Was that why Ero-sennin punched me in the gut like that way back when? Why didn't he explain what he was doing?

"Thank you, Hokage-sama," Crazy Snake Lady said, shocking me with how formal and polite she sounded. "If there is nothing else, I would like to return to our training session."

"Of course, Anko-chan," the Hokage replied. He turned to me, adding, "Be sure to follow her instructions, Naruto-kun. She is still young, but she is one of the best ninja in the village and she rarely teaches anyone her skills."

"What? She's crazy! You can't d-urk."

Crazy Snake Lady grabbed the back of my shirt and began pulling me out of the office before I could finish what I was saying. All I saw before the door closed was the Hokage smirking at me and laughing to himself.

* * *

><p>Crazy Snake Lady dumped me in the clearing back in the training ground, my head still spinning from whatever it was she was doing to move so fast.<p>

"Now then, it looks like I'm going to have my work cut out for me. From what I saw in the prelims, your taijutsu is shit, the only jutsu you ever use is the shadow clone technique, and you can't even tell when someone is using a genjutsu on you. If you ask me, you should have lost to the Aburame kid."

"What? Screw you, lady! I beat him fair and square!"

"You didn't lay a finger on him the entire time, idiot. If the fights weren't restricted to that small arena, he would have had you easily. As it was I can think of three different ways he could have won just using skills he displayed in that short fight."

"Bullshit!"

She just shook her head and held up one finger. "Used his bugs to suffocate you instead of just draining your chakra." She raised a second finger. "Stabbed you in the back with a kunai when you lost track of him the first, second, or _third _time." She raised a third finger. "Used a genjutsu to lure you out of the ring and force you to disqualify yourself. And I'm not even trying yet; I could go on all day. Face it, brat. You only won that because the other guy wasn't willing to go far enough to win. If you'd been facing Gaara, you'd be dead and then some. Kid may be crazy as fuck, but when it comes to that he's a ninja through and through."

I opened my mouth to reply, but couldn't come up with anything to say to that. Was I really that close to losing? Was I really that _bad_?

"What about my shadow clones?" I finally asked. "He couldn't do anything to counter those!"

Crazy Snake Lady smirked. "Maybe, maybe not. We're getting off track, though. What has One-eye had you working on?"

I glared at her, but eventually gave in. Both Kakashi-sensei and Hokage-jiji seemed to think she could help me, and after listening to her tear my performance in the prelims to shreds I was starting to think that maybe she really could.

"Uh, I've been focused on my chakra control mainly, and he's also been working on my taijutsu."

"How far along are you in the control exercises?"

"I've got water-walking down pretty good. Dunno what's after that, though."

"... meh, not too bad. I know your taijutsu sucks, but what about your ninjutsu? Is the shadow clone _really _the only thing you know?"

"I know another one, but Kakashi-sensei made me swear never to use it where it could possibly hit my allies."

Crazy Snake Lady blinked at that. "One-eye taught you something that dangerous?"

"Sorta...," I said. "I think it's mostly because I put too much chakra into it."

"Which jutsu is it?"

"Oh, the kunai shadow clone."

She snorted, looking amused before her expression suddenly froze. "Show me," she said, her voice carefully neutral.

"Uh, we are alone here, right?"

She nodded impatiently, pointing towards the far end of the clearing. I shrugged and pulled out a kunai, tossing it and running through the handseals with ease. As expected, a wave of black appeared and swept through the clearing.

The next thing I knew, Crazy Snake Lady's arm was hanging off my shoulder and she was purring into my ear. "Brat," she said, "I take back everything bad I ever said about you."

"Like that my taijutsu sucks and-"

"No, you still suck," she interrupted me, "but there may be hope for you yet."

* * *

><p>I thought that meant she was going to teach me some sort of awesome jutsu, but she spent the next two hours running me ragged instead. I had to run around the clearing while dodging thrown kunai, snakes she had summoned, surprise attacks from her directly, traps she'd somehow found time to lay out, and more. The worst part was she barely seemed like she was paying attention, because she kept muttering to herself and shaking her head.<p>

She finally let me go after making me promise to show up at nine the next morning.

I wanted nothing more than to crawl back to my apartment and collapse, but I still hadn't run into Ero-sennin yet. I wanted my awesome summon contract back, dammit! So, I made my way over to the public bathhouse.

It didn't take long to find him at all – he was crouched near the fence, peeking through a small hole and scribbling in his notebook.

"Pervert!" I shouted dully. I was too tired and too used to how he was to muster any sort of real outrage at the moment, but I still went through the motions.

After he had escaped from the many female bathers, he turned to me angrily. "What the hell was that for? There was some absolutely amazing research material in there!"

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered, stifling a yawn. It had been a _really _long day. "Instead of wasting your time with perverted stuff, you should help me train."

"Ha! And why should I help a brat like you!"

Brat, brat, brat. I was getting really tired of everyone calling me that.

"Because I'm the future Hokage, dattebayo!"

Ero-sennin wasn't even looking at me; he was too busy staring at a civilian in a low-cut dress who was walking by.

"Stop ignoring me, dammit!"

"Hmm? Oh, you're still here?" He sighed, looking annoyed. I could make out a small smirk on his face, though. "Fine, fine. You promise not to interrupt my _research_ anymore, and I'll show you a thing or two."

"Fine, I won't tell everyone you're a pervert. But you better teach me something good!"

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, making shooing motions with his hands. "Meet me at the north gates at two tomorrow. Now scram."

* * *

><p>I <em>finally <em>made it back to my apartment and had a chance to check on my progress.

**Naruto Uzumaki – Genin**

**Level: 6**

**Threat Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 4,842/7,000**

**Teacher: Anko Mitarashi**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 7**

**Precision: 3**

**Toughness: 5**

**Vitality: 10 (15)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 0/1**

**Genjutsu: 0/6**

**Kenjutsu: 0/1**

**Ninjutsu: 28/31**

**Taijutsu: 8/11**

**Abilities: **

**Army of One (1)**

**Kage Bunshin Barrage (*)**

**Traits:**

**Jinchuuriki**

**Kami's Luck**

**Will of Fire**

**Will of Fire**

Other than my teacher being Crazy Snake Lady now – and I prayed to Ramen that was not permanent – not much had changed. Still, I was a getting closer to my next level, so I should be at_ least _level seven by the time the finals rolled around.

**Active Mission: Prepare for the Exams!**

**Active Mission Details: You have thirty days to grow as strong as you possibly can! Make the most of them!**

**Arc: Chuunin Exams**

**You have completed: **

**D-ranks: 15**

**C-ranks: 0**

**B-ranks: 0**

**A-ranks: 1**

**S-ranks: 0**

**Special Events: 4**

**You have unlocked: **

**Achievements: 8**

**Special Characters: 0**

**Special Missions: 1**

Huh. That was the first time I'd actually seen mission stuff. It didn't tell me anything I didn't already know, though.

"Special events," I said, hoping that whatever had happened with the achievements didn't happen here.

**Passing on Knowledge: Sakura**

**Growing Closer: Team 8**

**Inspiration: Haku**

**Wave - Alternative Ending II**

"... huh?"

I mean, I got the whole passing on knowledge thing – I'd taught Sakura-chan tree-walking and water-walking, after all – but what was with that Team 8 thing? We did have lunch that one time... was that it? The thing with Haku made sense, but what was this crap with the _second _alternative ending? I'd only changed it once, hadn't I?

"Wave alternative ending two," I said.

… nothing.

"Oh, come on!"

* * *

><p>"Army of One!" I called out.<p>

I was met with a snort of amusement from Anko.

"That's the name of the technique? Seriously?"

"Hey! It's an awesome name!"

Anko just shook her head, although she did look thoughtful. "I guess you _did _use against the Aburame kid, didn't you? I just thought you were talking shit when you said it before, so I'll give you that. _And _you can do it without handseals – not too shabby. So, what does it do, exactly?"

"Uh... it just keeps me from getting hit. It only works ten times though, as far as I can tell... why are you looking at me like that?" I asked nervously.

She just smirked and then vanished. A moment later, my eyes crossed as a hand swept through my vision, the wrist seeming to stick out from my face.

"_Holy_ _fuck_," Anko cursed as the arm abruptly jerked backwards.

I spun around to find her staring at her hand, her eyes slightly wild. She blinked rapidly, looking to me then back to her hand several times before she shook herself. "You weren't joking, were you?" she said.

"I _told _you," I pointed out smugly.

She nodded, a slow grin spreading on her face. "That's one, right?"

A kunai appeared in her hand, whipping forward and digging into the dirt behind me.

"Two."

Her hands blurred as she summoned up a large brown snake and sent it towards me. It's jaws closed around my leg and passed through unhindered. It puffed into smoke a moment later.

"Three."

I tried to tell myself that her voice wasn't gleeful when she said that.

She thrust her hand forward, numerous snakes appearing out of her sleeve and trying to wrap around me. They all passed through unhindered.

"Four... or is it? For the purpose of the technique, is that considered one attack or several?"

"... I don't know?" I admitted. I hadn't even thought about that.

She frowned, visibly annoyed. "Well what did the manual for the technique say?"

"There wasn't one," I growled, annoyed myself. Everything would have been so much easier if something or someone would explain how half this crap worked.

"How the fuck did you learn this, then?"

"I... uh... it just told me how to do it, not how it worked?" I finally tried.

She rubbed her hand across her face and let out a sigh. "You would be stupid enough to just try any technique you could get your hands on, wouldn't you?" she said.

"Hey! That's...," I started, before realizing that I'd done exactly that with the Kage Bunshin.

She flicked her wrist and a senbon flew through the air, passing through my hand.

"Well, the technique's not used up entirely," she continued, ignoring my abandoned protest. "We'll assume that's five for the moment."

She paused, tapping her hand on her cheek for a moment before nodding. Her hands blurred again before she stomped her foot. I stared at her, wondering what she was doing, then my vision went dark for a moment. I blinked, and saw a wave of dirt plowing into the ground in front of me.

"Six, and you don't have to see it coming; _that's_ handy. Alright, now you try to attack me."

I paused, eying her suspiciously. "You aren't going to pull any of those fucked up moves like you did yesterday, are you?"

"What have you got to worry about? You've got your special Army of One technique up, don't you?"

I frowned at her, but eventually shrugged and charged forward to deliver a straightforward punch. She caught my attack in her own hand, and then my world exploded into pain.

I came to my senses a few minutes later, curled up in a fetal position and whimpering while my hands shielded my crotch from any further attacks.

"Sorry about that," she said insincerely. "If I knew it was going to work I might have used another counterattack."

"_Might have?_" I squeaked, doing my best to set her on fire with my eyes. It didn't work, but that would totally be an awesome jutsu to have. (1)

She shrugged in response. "Well, we didn't make it to the full ten, so clearly _something _went wrong. We'll have to try again tomorrow to narrow things down further. And I've got some other things I want to try as well."

"You suck," I wheezed.

"Ah... the whining of weak-ass genin... it's like music to my ears."

* * *

><p>I followed Shikamaru out of Lee's hospital room, my mind still focused on Lee's condition. I hadn't made it past the Chuunin Exams yet, but seeing the shape he was in now it was hard to imagine how he could recover. Maybe there was something I could do about that...<p>

"Congrats on making it to the finals," Shikamaru offered as he plopped down on a nearby bench.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, thanks. You too."

"You've gotten a lot stronger ever since we graduated," he continued. I blinked, noting that he had somehow managed to stretch out on the bench in that brief time and was staring at the ceiling with his hands tucked behind his head.

"Hey, I was always awesome!" I retorted. "... but yeah, I've really been training hard."

"So what happened in the forest that both you and Sasuke got hurt like that?"

"Oh, we had a run in with that Snake Bastard," I growled, frowning. "I'm definitely going to smash his face in next time, believe it!"

"Snake Bastard?"

"Oh, uh... Orochimaru. He's after Sasuke for some reason."

Shikamaru just hummed thoughtfully, his eyes still staring at the ceiling. Finally, he said, "I noticed that you've managed to pick up some new jutsu, as well. I thought the clone jutsu was the one you had so much trouble with..."

"It was," I admitted, "but that's the basic crap. Shadow clone is awesome!"

"And that Barrage thing? That's something you picked up recently too?"

"Yeah! That thing's great!"

He just nodded to himself, then pulled himself off of the bench. "Well, I need to get going. Good luck with your training," he said, waving as he walked off.

"Thanks! You too!" I yelled back. I scratched my head as I watched him leave. I didn't talk to Shikamaru a whole lot, but that conversation seemed a little off for some reason.

Meh, whatever. I still needed to visit Hinata while I was here. Last time she'd been really messed up and couldn't get any visitors, but she was in one of the normal rooms this time.

I made my way down the hall, smiling politely at the nurses who were hurrying back and forth. I'd had problems visiting the hospital before, but as long as I didn't make a whole lot of noise they didn't get upset at me or anything. I'd tried to liven the place up years back – the orange walls looked absolutely _awesome_ – but nobody seemed to appreciate that but me. They'd even made me paint them white again... that was just _mean._

I paused outside of Hinata's door once I found her room, feeling a little awkward for some reason. I quickly shook it off though and walked on in.

Hinata's bed was the only one in the room, and there were a lot of different flowers and cards stacked everywhere. I glanced at a few, noting that they said something along the lines of "Get well, Hyuuga-san." Didn't know that Hinata was that popular, but then again she is really nice, if a little quiet and weird.

The girl herself was currently asleep, resting on her back with her eyes closed. She was covered by a thick blanket and propped up against numerous pillows that looked ridiculously fluffy.

I shuffled awkwardly, glancing back at the door. I didn't want to just leave without saying hi, but I didn't want to wake her up either. She looked really cu- _comfortable _lying there, and I know I'd be really mad if someone woke me up from a good sleep.

Ah. I could just leave her a note; that should work. That way she'd know I dropped by and I could still let her sleep. Perfect.

There was a small notepad and a pen sitting on the table next to her bed. I grabbed those and settled into a chair, the pen poised over the paper.

"Dear Hinata," I began, then shook my head – I was writing a note, not a letter. I tore off that sheet and tossed it aside.

"Hey Hinata," I started again. Yeah, that was better.

"I stopped by to say hi, but you were asleep and I didn't want to wake you. Hope you are feeling bett-" With a growl of annoyance, I tore off that sheet and tossed it aside as well. That didn't sound right for some reason.

"Hey Hinata, I came to visit you, but-"

"What are you doing?" I heard a curious voice ask quietly from beside me.

"Gah!" I let out a strangled yell and almost leapt up from the chair, barely controlling myself in time. Hearing Hinata make a noise and shift in her sleep, I clamped my hands over my mouth to avoid disturbing her further and risk waking her up fully. Once she settled back, I removed my hands and turned to look at who had spoken.

There was a small girl, looking like she was maybe six or seven years old, standing next to me. She was watching me with one eyebrow raised and a smirk. She had long brown hair that fell down her back, along with one long strand that hung down in the middle of her face. She was wearing a a dark gray sleeveless shirt and loose black pants along with a pair of ninja sandals. Her most prominent feature, though, was her pale, pupiless eyes.

"What are you doing?" she asked again, amusement clear in her voice.

"I was writing a note," I replied.

She crossed her arms and looked at me like I was some sort of idiot. "Obviously," she muttered. "I meant why were you doing that _here_?"

"Because I was writing a note for Hinata, _obviously_," I snapped back, just barely remembering to whisper so as not to wake Hinata.

She sighed and shook her head, her expression somehow conveying that her opinion of me had dropped even lower. "Clearly you came here to visit her... did you not have the sense to prepare a card or flowers? Even those who can't be bothered to visit personally at least did that much. If you are trying to impress father, then you have already failed miserably."

I tilted my head to the side, feeling both confused and annoyed. "What the hell are you talking about, _chibi_? I was here to visit Hinata, not whoever your father is... who are you, anyway?"

Her eyes widened – which looks really, really strange on a Hyuuga, I noted – and her mouth dropped open. She just gaped at me for a second before her mouth snapped shut and her face flushed red. "I am Hanabi Hyuuga, heiress to the Hyuuga clan," she snapped, her chin lifting in the air. "I am not _'chibi', _you cretin. As for my father, he-"

"I got it, I got it," I interrupted her, not really paying attention past her name. "Look, Hanabi-chan, I really need to finish this note, so why don't you run along and find your father. I'm sure he's worried about where you are." I made a shooing motion with one hand, the other already working to finish the note.

The pad was suddenly jerked away from me, and I turned to find Hanabi holding it and staring at it. "Your handwriting is horrible," she said triumphantly, smiling like she'd just won some great victory.

I reached out and snatched the pad back. "My handwriting is _fine_. I can read it without any problems, and so can everyone else. Maybe _you_ need to get your eyes checked."

She spluttered at me before snatching the pad away again. She may be small, but she was _quick_.

"The note is insipid and bland," she said this time. "You should save yourself the embarrassment of anyone reading it and just leave."

"What the hell does that even mean?" I growled, trying to grab the notepad back. She held onto it this time, latching on with both hands and leaning back to put her weight into it as she tried to keep it away from me.

I held on with one hand, slowly pulling it back towards me despite her efforts.

"Stupid!" she hissed.

"My note is _not _stupid," I growled back. "And if you meant stupid _say _stupid, instead of making up words."

"Idiot!" she grunted, digging in her heels and leaning back even further.

"_What_ are you _doing_?" a male voice asked calmly while still managing to convey disappointment.

Hanabi abruptly let go of the pad, falling backwards and landing on her rear with a small yelp. The hand that had been pulling on the pad, now that there was no resistance, flew backwards and smacked into my face, landing square on my nose.

"Ow," I muttered, shaking my head to clear it and massaging my nose to try and relieve the pain.

"I would like an explanation for your behavior," the man said again. I turned to find another Hyuuga, this one with long black hair and dressed in white robes, standing just inside the doorway. His entire form seemed to radiate a sort of stiff disapproval.

"I was just writing a note for Hinata when _chibi _here interrupted me," I explained. I wasn't sure why I did, but something about him reminded me of Iruka-sensei or Hokage-jiji when they were scolding me about some prank I'd pulled and I just reacted.

"I saw a strange boy sitting in Nee-sama's room and talking to himself, so I confronted him," Hanabi explained quickly, her tone suddenly very formal.

"I was not ta- uh... ok, maybe I was, but I was just saying what I was writing," I admitted. "I do that sometimes." Then the rest of what she had said hit me. "Oh, so you're Hinata's little sister. Why didn't you just say so?"

Her face twitched and started to grow red again. "I _did_," she said firmly.

"No you didn't. You just said you were the heiress or whatever."

She made some sort of weird strangled noise, then just hissed, "Idiot!"

"Hanabi," the man said, his voice firm. "Such behavior is not befitting of the Hyuuga clan. We should never address other people in such a manner, no matter how accurate it may seem."

"Yeah, what he said," I added, nodding in agreement.

Hanabi just stared at me for a moment before turning her attention back to the man who was still standing in the doorway. "I understand, Father."

"... hey, that means you're Hinata's dad, huh?"

Before he could reply, there was a noise from behind us as Hinata slowly sat up in her bed, rubbing her eyes.

"Hmm?" she said, blinking. "What's going-" she cut off abruptly, her eyes widening as she stared at me. Then they rolled up in the back of her head and she fell back on the pillows.

"Hey!" I called out, jumping out of my chair. "Is she ok?" I made to rush over to the bed, but a hand clamped onto my shoulder before I even made it halfway.

"She is fine, Uzumaki-san," Hinata's dad said firmly, looking down at me with that same blank expression he'd had since he first showed up. "I will be sure to let her know that you were concerned for her when next she awakes, but I would like to spend some time visiting her privately, if that is acceptable."

It was phrased as a question, but the way he said it made it very clear that I was supposed to agree.

"Yeah, I got it," I said, nodding. "Family and all that. Hope she gets to feeling better soon," I added.

"I appreciate the sentiment, Uzumaki-san," Hinata's dad said calmly, as he released my shoulder. "The doctors tell me she should be fully recovered soon, so you may rest easy."

"Awesome!" I replied. "Alright, I'll get out of your way then. Later Hinata's Dad, later _chibi!_" I called out as I left the room.

One last glance as I left showed Hanabi's face slowly turning red again and the corner of Hinata's Dad's mouth lifting upwards ever so slightly.

* * *

><p>"Naruto! Where the hell have you been?" Sakura-chan called out from across the street.<p>

I was on my way to Ichiraku's after another brutal training session with Crazy Snake Lady. So far we'd determined that her snake jutsu thingy only counted as one "attack" and that counterattacking didn't make any difference, even if she was holding on to some other part of my body; I'd never been happier not to get kicked in the balls in my entire life. Her plan for the next day was to use her dirt wave jutsu again, to see if that made any difference.

My training with Ero-sennin had turned out to be pretty short. I had no problems summoning Gamabunta on the first try, something that actually shut the pervert up for a minute. Once I'd impressed the Toad Boss and he'd gone back to wherever it was he stayed when he wasn't summoned, I went back to bugging Ero-sennin. He just brushed me off when I asked him to teach me something else, though; he wanted me to keep practicing my summoning and get to know the Toads or something. I mean, yeah, Toads are awesome, but couldn't he have taught me some other technique while I was doing that?

And I wasn't just asking because that meant all of my training time was overseen by Crazy Snake Lady. That wasn't it at all.

"I just got done with training for this morning, so I was going to get lunch, Sakura-chan," I replied, smiling at her.

She paused, staring at me with narrowed eyes before sighing and shaking her head. "You're going to that ramen place again, aren't you?"

"Of course!"

She sighed again, looking indecisive for a minute. "Fine. Whatever. But this isn't a date, alright? I'm just sick of trying to track you down."

"Uh... ok, Sakura-chan. But why were you looking for me, anyway?" I asked as I resumed my journey to the ramen stand.

"I assume Kakashi-sensei talked to you about your training for this month?"

"Yeah. He arranged for someone to take over my training, but... I kinda wish he hadn't."

Sakura-chan looked surprised at that. "Really? Why? I mean, I know you train on your own, but you- um, well, you seem to... benefit from focused instruction."

I blinked, sorting through what she had said before shrugging. "Yeah, I learn fast when someone is teaching me, but the lady he picked...," I leaned towards Sakura-chan and lowered my voice, "she's _insane_."

She frowned at me. "You shouldn't insult your teacher like that, Naruto. She's taking time to help you out, after all."

"It's the Crazy Snake Lady from the exams," I said flatly.

"Oh. _Oh. _That's... oh," she said quietly. She finally just winced and patted me on the shoulder sympathetically. "She can't be that bad, can she? I mean, she was probably just acting like that to scare us..."

I shook my head vigorously and shivered. "She was being _nice,_" I insisted.

Sakura-chan just patted me on the shoulder again.

We arrived at Ichiraku's shortly after that, and I settled in to eat my usual lunch.

"Ten bowls of the Uzumaki Surprise, coming up!" Teuchi-ojisan said cheerfully.

"Uzumaki Surprise?" Sakura-chan asked blankly. "What's that?"

"Our Naruto-kun here, as I'm sure you know, likes to eat ramen." Sakura huffed at the understatement, causing Teuchi's smile to widen as he continued. "In exchange for offering him a discount, he agreed to serve as a taste-tester for any new ramen recipes I can come up with. Sometimes that's just tweaking one of my old recipes, and sometimes its something completely new."

I grinned widely. "Teuchi-ojisan's ramen is awesome, and it just keeps getting better!"

Sakura-chan just nodded, then turned her attention back to me. "Anyway, the reason I was looking for you was to ask about your new techniques...," she trailed off for a moment, then shook her head and focused. "Where did you learn them from? Do you think I could try learning them as well?"

I winced. "It's... not really something I can just teach you, Sakura-chan," I said apologetically. "There's some very... special circumstances around how I got them."

Her eyes narrowed at me. "If you're going to try to tell me about that reliving events stuff again...," she growled threatening.

I just shrugged at her. I'd tried telling her the truth, but she didn't want to listen; there wasn't much else I could do.

"Fine, be that way. But if you aren't going to help with that, you can at least be my sparring partner every now and then."

"I'd love to!" I said enthusiastically. "But... Crazy Snake Lady has been training me pretty much nonstop all day every day. I could try to spar when we finish up, but that'd be pretty late."

"Well... why don't I just join you, then? Even if she doesn't want to spend her time training me, I'm sure you would benefit from sparring against someone closer to your skill level, right? I could just watch and work on my own stuff until then."

I stared at her for a moment, then shook my head frantically. "That's a really, really, _really _bad idea, Sakura-chan."

"What?" she growled threateningly. "You don't think I could keep up? I know you've got more stamina than me... or anyone else I've ever met," she added under her breath, "but that doesn't mean I'm weak."

"That's not it at all, Sakura-chan," I protested. "It's just... she's _crazy_!"

"Honestly, Naruto," Sakura said dismissively, "how bad could it really be?"

* * *

><p>"Fufufu," Crazy Snake Lady chuckled to herself, "little Pinky wants to play, huh?"<p>

"I would be very grateful for any assistance you were willing to offer, Mitarashi-sensei," Sakura-chan said politely, though her smile was a little strained. "I'll be sure not to interfere in Naruto's training otherwise."

"Fufufu...," Crazy Snake Lady laughed again. "You guys are on the same team, after all, so this'll be a good chance to add in some teamwork training as well."

She looked back and forth between us for a few seconds, then nodded to herself. "Alright Blondie, we're going with the usual for now. You've got thirty seconds to prep Pinky, then it starts."

I paled even as she vanished into the trees.

"What's the usual?" Sakura-chan asked curiously.

"I try to survive her attacks as long as I can while trying to identify the real one."

Sakura-chan's brow furrowed. "The real one? What, she uses a lot of clones?"

"Yeah," I said. "Look, we need to keep moving. She just gets worse if you stay in one place for too long."

Sakura-chan nodded, looking a little nervous but also a little excited. "This is really different from how Kakashi-sensei does things. It'll be a good change of pace... what kind of attacks does she use? Taijutsu, some basic traps maybe?"

"Exploding tags, venomous snakes, poisoned kunai, this funky ass taijutsu that really hurts even if she just pokes you, nasty genjutsu..."

Sakura-chan was rapidly getting paler. She opened her mouth to say something, but clamped it shut when my hand whipped forward and caught a viper that had been lunging towards her face. My other hand lashed out with a kunai and stabbed its head, dispelling it.

Sakura-chan stared at me, wide-eyed.

"Oh, and she always starts early," I added belatedly. My ear twitched as I heard the continual hissing sound I'd learned to associate with exploding tags. I grabbed Sakura-chan's arm and pulled her with me even as I jumped away, barely avoiding the explosion.

"C'mon Pinky," Crazy Snake Lady's mocking voice rang out from the trees around us. "Surely you can do a little better than dead weight. Fuck if I'm going to bother wasting time on someone that pathetic."

Sakura-chan's eyes narrowed and her face flushed. She shook off my hand and clenched her fists. "I'll show you pathetic, _**shannaro!**_" she shouted into the forest.

The only response was more mocking laughter.

* * *

><p>"And dead," Crazy Snake Lady said as she tapped the handle of her kunai against Sakura-chan's forehead. "After seeing what Blondie here can do, I expected more from his teammate," she added. "You're quick on the uptake, but your physical conditioning is shit."<p>

Sakura-chan just continued to lay on the ground, her breath coming in ragged gasps. I wasn't in much better shape, as I was trying to ignore the burning sensation spreading throughout my body from my thigh where one of her snakes had bitten me. It seemed like she used a different one every time, and some of them _hurt_. She didn't even bother giving me an antidote anymore, telling me to work through it and learn to deal with the pain instead. It was kinda hard to concentrate when it felt like someone had set you on fire from the inside, though. Thankfully, I could already feel it starting to fade.

I still think she was just being sadistic, though.

"Hey, she did really awesome for her first-"

"Shut it, Blondie. The only reason she wasn't out in the first attack is because you saved her ass. She did a little better after that, but most of what I saw today wasn't teamwork, but you carrying her. You lasted forty minutes longer than this yesterday when you were on your own."

"Hey, you were pushing a lot harder today!" I insisted.

She turned to look at me and shook her head. "No, I wasn't," she replied. "You were having a harder time because you were forced to look out for her too."

"But!"

"I'll... do better...," Sakura-chan panted, forcing herself up off of the ground. Her cheek was swelling up where one of Anko's clones had punched her and her lip was bleeding, but her gaze didn't waver. "Not gonna... give up..."

Crazy Snake Lady looked her over once, then snorted and shook her head. "I'll believe it when I see it," she said dismissively. "You're done for the day," she continued, jabbing her thumb back towards the village. "If you decide to show up tomorrow, you better do a hell of a lot better than this or I'll make you regret wasting our time."

Sakura-chan glared at her defiantly, then began making her way out of the training ground.

"As for you, Blondie, we're starting again, and I expect you to last a hell of a lot longer. And we're starting... now."

I'd been about to complain about how she was treating Sakura-chan, but I was forced to swallow my words and start running as several snakes appeared out of nowhere and lunged for me.

* * *

><p><strong>Naruto Uzumaki – Genin<strong>

**Level: 6**

**Threat Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 6,783/7,000**

**Teacher: Anko Mitarashi**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 7**

**Precision: 3**

**Toughness: 5**

**Vitality: 10 (15)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 0/1**

**Genjutsu: 6/6**

**Kenjutsu: 0/1**

**Ninjutsu: 31/31**

**Taijutsu: 11/11**

**Abilities: **

**Army of One (1)**

**Kage Bunshin Barrage (*)**

**Traits:**

**Jinchuuriki**

**Kami's Luck**

**Poison Resistance I**

**Will of Fire**

**Will of Fire**

"Dammit...," I muttered. I had been so sure I would get another level before the exams, but for some reason I barely got any experience points despite all the training I was doing with Anko-sensei. On the other hand, my skills had improved a lot and I'd picked up that new poison resistance trait last week; I guess getting bitten by all those snakes was good for something after all.

There had been some other benefits, too. I'd learned more than I ever thought possible about the Army of One technique, for one thing. It turned out that the wave of dirt thing actually _did _make a difference; it used up whatever Army of One had left to avoid it. We'd also figured out that any techniques that could hit multiple targets at once like that did the same thing. She'd even used this one technique during training where snakes came up out of the ground all around her and tried to wrap around people's legs. I thought that would only count as one hit since it was basically just like the one where the snakes came out of her sleeves, but her next attack landed.

Neither of us expected that to happen, which was kinda bad since she broke four of my ribs by kicking me in the side.

That actually really bothered Anko-sensei for a little while – the fact that her kick landed, not that I got hurt... once she decided that I wasn't going to die my injury didn't seem to bother her much. She kept ranting for almost ten minutes about how it didn't make any _sense_... then abruptly stopped. She didn't talk about it any more after that, and actually stopped testing the Army of One technique entirely. She wouldn't do anything even if I specifically asked her to, which sucked. She'd mentioned that she had a bunch more things to try, but she apparently no longer remembered any of them and had never told me what they were.

Still, I had to get to the stadium for the start of the finals, so there was no way I could somehow manage to acquire the last few points I needed... not that I knew how to do that, actually. I still hadn't figured out exactly how to get them; I just knew that the total went up a little bit every day, and that it seemed to go up faster when I was doing missions.

For now, I'd just have to make do with what I had.

* * *

><p>"Begin!" the new announcer guy called out. Just like I thought they would, they replaced Cough Guy again.<p>

"You are fated to lose today, just as Hinata-sama was fated to lose in the preliminaries," Neji intoned, staring across the arena at me.

Kami, but I was going to love this.

"You should surr-"

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!"

Unfortunately, it wasn't the start of the Naruto Combo like I'd hoped – the thought of mule-kicking Neji in the face made me all giggly – but I'd take the swarm of clones that appeared. Neji vanished under the weight of dozens of copies of me, all of them flailing away as they attacked him.

They dispelled a few seconds later, revealing a lightly bruised Neji who had activated his byakugan and had a look of utter rage painted on his face.

"_You_," he snarled, before stopping himself with a jerk and taking a deep breath. "Your attempts to defy fate," he continued, his voice calmer but still carrying a harsh edge, "merely show the limits of your ability. You continue to rely upon the same technique, one which was insufficient against me. Your only hope of taking me by surprise has failed. Accept your fate and surrender now."

"Like hell I will!" I shouted back. "Why don't you try actually fighting, jackass?"

Neji smiled slightly, a manic gleam entering his eye. "Then it is my fate to show you the futility of your actions."

With that, he charged forward, closing the distance between us rapidly. Just like the first time we fought, he wanted to make it a close-range fight. Part of me still wanted to go toe-to-toe with him, just to prove yet again that I could, but Anko-sensei had threatened... _things... _if I did that.

I shivered, making Neji's smirk grow even more.

Then I tossed the rock I'd picked up earlier at him and rapidly ran through the handseals required. "Rock Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Anko-sensei had pointed out that the name itself didn't actually matter all that much, and I just liked the idea of changing it up like that. She seemed to find it kind of funny too, if the way she kept bringing me weird objects to use was any indication.

When the technique activated, what was a single rock turned into a nearly solid wall of stone, advancing rapidly across the battlefield.

I didn't wait to see what he'd do – based on our first fight he'd pull out that spinny thing, then start bragging again. Instead, I moved on to the next part of the plan.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" I called out, creating several clones. They all moved to the edges of the arena, picking up several more rocks as they did so. I took up position along with the rest of them, tossing a single rock up and down in my hand.

As the shadow rocks turned into smoke, revealing the last traces of the chakra dome Neji had created, I grinned. "Gotcha," I said to myself.

"Your technique has failed again, Uzumaki," Neji called out. "You cannot hope to defeat me like that."

I nodded to the clone next to me, who grinned widely as he threw his rock and called out the name of the technique. I had just enough time to see Neji's eyes widen before he was blocked from my sight.

I started whistling, leaning back against the wall and half-closing my eyes as I watched.

The dome dissipated again, revealing Neji who was still unharmed but starting to pant lightly. "I am still unharmed, Uzu-"

He was interrupted as the next clone threw its rock.

"You will not-"

Another rock.

"I-"

Another rock.

A few more rocks after that, and he was gasping for breath, his legs trembling as he tried to glare me to death. He'd stopped talking and started trying to get out of the center of the arena, but my clones were waiting for him and made sure he didn't have a chance to make it more than a few steps.

I wonder if this was how Anko-sensei felt when she was training me and Sakura-chan? No wonder she looked like she was having so much fun...

"So...," I said as I pushed off the wall and moved towards the center of the arena, "how's it feel to lose a match you were _fated _to win?"

He kept up his glare, his fists clenched tightly as I continued to move closer.

"All it took to beat you was a bunch of rocks and a single jutsu," I said. "What does fate have to say about that?" I finished as I stopped next to him and matched his glare with one of my own.

His face twisted and his hand lashed out, glowing blue as it lanced towards my chest. I'd expected him to do that, though, and easily side-stepped before kneeing him in the gut.

The air was driven from his lungs and he fell to his knees, clutching at his bruised ribs.

"Fate is a bunch of bullshit. Nothing is decided, anything can change, and it's no excuse to act like such a stuck-up asshole," I said, slowly clenching my fist. I grinned widely and added, "But I'll give you one thing – the moment you did that to Hinata, it was _fated_ that I was going to kick your ass."

He lashed out again, desperately, but he'd used up far too much of his energy doing his spinny move and was on his last legs already. I easily avoided it once more, then punched him in the face as hard as I could. His nose made a loud crunching noise as it broke, and he collapsed bonelessly to the ground.

"Winner, Naruto Uzumaki!" the announcer called out.

* * *

><p>I made my way back up to the balcony where the contestants were gathered, listening to the cheering crowd. Did they do that last time? I couldn't really remember, but I was certainly enjoying it now. I'd had a much harder time against Neji the first time around, but with my new jutsu and all the training I'd gone through, I'd been in control the entire time.<p>

It was a good feeling.

"Congrats, Naruto," Sakura-chan said distractedly as I stepped onto the balcony, not even looking at me as she continued to scan the stadium. "Have you seen Sasuke-kun anywhere? It's his turn to fight...,"

That feeling faded along with my smile as I saw Sakura-chan was barely even paying attention.

"No...," I forced out, pasting a smile on my face. "I'm sure he'll show up eventually though. He wouldn't miss a chance to show off, after all."

"I wonder why he hasn't shown up yet... do you think something happened? What if he got hurt? Or is Kakashi-sensei being slow again?" She scowled. "If he makes Sasuke-kun late I'll... I'll... I'll sic Anko-sensei on him!"

"Yeah," I agreed dully. She just kept muttering to herself and scanning the stadium.

I turned and moved to the other end of the contestant's section.

"Way to go, Naruto!" Chouji cheered, clapping me on the shoulder. "That was amazing!" He frowned suddenly, looking nervous. "Uh, if we end up fighting? Can you, uh, not do that to me? I don't mean let me win!" he said, waving his hands. "Just..."

"Huh? Oh, I wouldn't do that to you, Chouji. Neji just really pissed me off."

Chouji relaxed, grinning. "Thanks, Naruto. I don't think I can beat you, but I'd like to at least have a chance, you know?"

"Hey, you made it to the finals this time! I'm sure you'll do- er... you're fighting Sakura-chan, aren't you?"

He laughed and pulled out a bag of chips, shaking his head slightly. "I know you'll cheer for her," he said, grinning at me. "Just don't hold it against me if I win."

I glanced back at Sakura-chan, who was still scanning the stadium and talking to herself. I'm not sure she had even noticed I had left. I turned back to look at Chouji.

"I won't."

"Sasuke Uchiha has five minutes to report to the arena floor!" the announcer called out.

"Troublesome...," Shikamaru sighed from where he was slouched against the railing. He turned his head to look at me. "Why isn't your teammate here yet? If he forfeits his match that means mine will happen even sooner... although I suppose I could just forfeit mine too," he added, looking thoughtful. Then he winced. "Nevermind."

"He'll show up later," I shrugged. "They're not gonna make him forfeit, anyway," I added.

"Hmm...," Shikamaru hummed. "Whatever. Congrats, by the way. Neji was top of his class last year, and you made him look pathetic. Remind me not to piss you off."

"He had it coming," I pointed out. "There's all that fate crap, and then there's what he did to Hinata..."

"Didn't realize you and Hinata were friends," Shikamaru commented.

"She's a little weird, but really smart; she figured out that Army of One thing really quick. Plus she's got the same nindo as me," I replied. I felt a chill wash over me and I blinked. Why was I feeling that now?

"She does?"

"Yeah, she said so during the prelims," I replied, distracted as I worked through the problem I was facing.

"Sasuke Uchiha has not appeared," the announced called out, "so his match with Gaara of the Sand will be moved to the last spot. Will Chouji Akimichi and Sakura Haruno please report to the arena floor."

My eyes widened as I finally realized what I had said. "Son of a bitch!" I growled, getting some odd looks from the other competitors. I hadn't meant to use Army of One _now_!

Sakura-chan and Chouji made their way down, Chouji looking determined and Sakura-chan looking distracted and worried. I was afraid she would remain like that when the fight started, but she seemed to shake it off and focused on her opponent before the announcer actually called for the match to begin.

I'd seen what Chouji could do in the prelims, both times, and he seemed to be pretty strong. I'd been surviving Anko-sensei with Sakura-chan for several weeks, though, and knew just what she could do. That was why I wasn't at all surprised when Chouji suddenly wobbled on his feet and then collapsed after clashing with Sakura-chan and her kunai a few times.

"Troublesome...," Shikamaru muttered. "She poisoned her kunai, didn't she?"

"Yeah, Anko-sensei gave her some tips and Sakura-chan kinda ran with it. They're not lethal, though," I added quickly.

"Troublesome...," Shikamaru repeated tiredly. "Now I have to fight, and it's practically noon."

"You'll do fine," I said encouragingly. "Now are you going to go down there, or do I need to push you?"

He shot me a glare before turning and slouching off towards the stairway. "Why do the blondes have to be so troublesome?" he muttered, more than loud enough to where I could hear it clearly.

"'Cause blondes are awesome!" I yelled at his back.

Sakura-chan bounded up the stairs, smiling brightly. "I can't believe I won!" she called out as she floated over to me. "I mean, I've been training hard and everything, but I almost never beat Chouji in spars back in the Academy! This is great!"

"Congrats, Sakura-chan!" I told her, giving her a thumbs up. I wasn't quite as happy about her win as I thought I would be, though.

"Thanks, Naruto!" she said, smiling at me. She glanced around. "Has Sasuke-kun gotten back yet? I can't wait to tell him I actually won!" Her grin widened. "Oh! What if we end up fighting in the finals? Wouldn't that be great? Me and Sasuke-kun, winner and runner-up! He'd win, of course, but I bet I can really impress him with how strong I've gotten. I wonder what he and Kakashi-sensei have been doing this past month, anyway... I bet it's going to be awesome!"

I felt my smile falter again, and I slowly lowered my hand to my side. I'd really gotten used to the more serious and focused Sakura-chan I'd seen over the last month, but I could barely recognize that girl in the giddy one standing next to me. Where was the girl who faced off against Anko-sensei and didn't falter? The one who struggled through with sheer determination and kept standing back up after Anko-sensei knocked us down again and again?

I liked that one more.

* * *

><p>Shikamaru surrendered again, just like he had last time, and just like last time Sasuke-teme showed up at the last minute. It kinda <em>was<em> a cool entrance, but did he really have to show off that much?

While he and Gaara started fighting, I started looking around the stadium, trying to spot the people who were going to attack. I remembered some fighting where Hokage-jiji was, and ninja clashing throughout the stadium, but the main fight had been with Gaara outside the village. I was all set for that, but it would be good to know what else was going on in case I ended up doing this again. Like in Wave, knowing what was going on ahead of time had really paid off... although not quite like I had hoped.

Temari was watching the fight and looking a little nervous. Her other teammate, Kankuro, the one with all the makeup, was sitting in the stands closest to the competitor's balcony and looked just as nervous. Most of the other rookies were clumped together, and I saw Team Eight all sitting in a group. Hinata actually glanced over at me and saw me looking, but she immediately ducked her head and looked away.

I really didn't get her sometimes.

I caught sight of some ANBU standing around the top edge of the arena, actually out in the open for once. They were normally a lot harder to spot, if you could see them at all. I'd eventually learned that there were _four _of them in the Hokage's office at all times, but I'd never once actually seen them. The Hokage even let me poke around in his office once to look for them, chuckling to himself the entire time.

"Blood!" I heard Gaara scream. "It's my blood!"

My eyes widened in anticipation; that was what had happened just before...

I yawned and rubbed my eyes.

That happened just before all the fighting...

I yawned again, then groaned in sudden understanding as I remembered what else had signaled the start of the fighting.

"Son of a...," I muttered as my eyes drifted shut.

* * *

><p>(1) - I must have reread this scene three or four times before I realized that the Mangekyou Sharingan actually <em>can<em> do that with Amaterasu. I hereby take back everything bad I ever said about the Uchiha clan... and then reissue all of those statements, because they can (under the right circumstances) set people on fire with their eyes and they _still_ suck.

Since the last log check:

Level: 7

XP: 1,069/8,000

New Achievements: None

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who voted in the poll! I let the poll run for roughly two weeks, but the winners maintained their lead fairly convincingly and didn't seem to be changing. Those winners being Hanabi and Shikamaru, obviously. I'll say now that Shikamaru was always going to be one of the first ones recruited, but I can honestly say I didn't expect Hanabi to place nearly so high. That said, I do know what I'm going to do with her and how she'll end up being recruited - as I did for all of the characters listed, which is also why Neji and Lee weren't.  
><strong>

**Poor Chouji, though. He gets no love. No respect. He didn't even manage to beat Kiba.  
><strong>

**The next chapter will focus on the Gaara fight and the aftermath of the invasion, at which point Naruto's situation begins to change quite radically. Oh, and I also get to reveal just how much I've been screwing him over up to this point, which I'm rather looking forward to. *evil grin*  
><strong>

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!  
><strong>

**Edit: 06-17-2012 - Prompted by Zepheric's review, I revised Naruto's conversation with Shikamaru slightly to show that he did accidentally use Army of One while talking to him. And yes, that does mean that the ability does not negate genjutsu, either directly or indirectly.  
><strong>


	6. Life Five: Team Ninja 2

When I next opened my eyes, my face was hurting and Sakura was looking at me upside-down, her head framed by the sky.

"Naruto-baka! Wake up already!" she yelled at me, her hand raised as if she was going to slap someone. Like me, apparently.

"I'm awake," I mumbled, rolling over and pushing myself off of the floor.

"It's about time! Konoha is being attacked and you were over here taking a nap!"

"Sorry," I replied, shaking my head to clear my thoughts and starting to scan the stadium. I could make out small pockets of fighting in all directions, and there was a weird purple glowing box on top of the stadium's roof. I vaguely remembered that from last time, but I never did get the chance to find out what it was. I'll have to do that after I take care of Gaara.

"Naruto! Sakura! Shikamaru" Kakashi-sensei called out as he appeared next to us, holding off one of the Oto-nin with his kunai. "Go help Sasuke! He's pursuing Gaara and his teammates out into the forest!"

Yep, same as last time. The group of us - me, Sakura, and Shikamaru - made our way out of the stadium, chasing after Sasuke. We even ran into the same groups of enemies we had the first time, with Shikamaru staying behind to hold off the group of chuunin and jounin and Shino showing up to take on Kankuro. That meant Sakura was still with me when we finally caught up with Sasuke.

He was currently struggling against Gaara, trying to gain enough distance and time to use Chidori again. Gaara wasn't having any of that, and was already half-covered with sand as he screamed insanely and kept shouting about his mother and blood.

I grinned as I stepped forward, cracking my knuckles. I wasn't as pissed at Gaara as I was at Neji – Gaara had it worse than anybody – but I was also looking forward to winning this fight even more handily than I had before.

* * *

><p>I stared across the shattered remains of the forest, panting slowly.<p>

Giant raccoon thing taken care of? Check.

Summoned Gamabunta and kicked some serious ass? Check.

Easier than last time? … not so much. Maybe I'd zigged this time when I zagged last time, but I would have remembered getting clipped by one of those giant balls of air the Ichibi was spitting out. And I _definitely_ would have remembered Gamabunta snagging me with his tongue to prevent me from falling to the ground.

Toads were awesome, but I was ok without going through that.

Gaara was just beginning to shake off his daze, pushing himself up using his arms and looking around slowly. His eyes widened visibly and he began scrambling backwards, the effort looking ineffective and vaguely pitiful.

"Stop! Don't come any closer!" he screamed hoarsely.

I sighed and began limping towards him, ignoring the pain shooting up my right leg and the fact that my left arm was completely useless. I'd barely taken two steps before I paused; I may not have remembered exactly how things went down up to now, but I remembered this moment vividly. Back what seemed like years ago, I had walked towards Gaara, prepared to give him a solid punch for being a crazy asshole and then figure out what to do from there. I hadn't made it, of course, because something sharp had hit me – killed me.

I whirled around, scanning the clearing and desperately wishing that I hadn't accidentally used Army of One earlier that day – it had stopped working by the time I got into my fight with Gaara, though I can't remember anything that should have used it up. I'd have to look into that, later.

I spotted Sakura and Sasuke off to the side, Sakura looking stunned and Sasuke staring at me with an expression I didn't have time to figure out just now. There were long lines of broken trees and shattered wood where Shukaku and Gamabunta had fought against each other, and piles of sand that the tailed beast had left behind.

Then there were Gaara's siblings. Kankuro looked just as stunned as Sakura, but Temari looked both scared and angry, and she was swinging her fan in my-

"Holy shit!" I yelped, dropping to the ground. I landed roughly and my leg made an odd crunching noise that didn't sound good at all, but I avoided the blades of wind that swept through where my torso had been moments before.

"What the hell?" I called out, rolling to the side and putting a tree trunk between myself and the crazy girl. "What was that for?"

"I won't let you kill him!" she screamed.

"I wasn't going to kill him!" I screamed back. "If I wanted to do that I wouldn't have bothered waking him up!"

The assembled ninja were silent at that, and I cautiously poked my head over the edge of the tree trunk I was hiding behind. Temari was staring at me suspiciously, but her fan was lowered and she didn't seem likely to resume her attack.

"We need to get out of here," Kankuro said as he shook off his surprise. He began edging around me, circling towards Gaara while staying well back from my position. Temari followed his lead, her eyes flicking between me and Sakura and Sasuke as if watching for any signs of betrayal.

"Stay away!" Gaara screamed. "Stay back!"

"We're trying to get you out of here!" Kankuro snapped back. "You're hurt, and if we stay any longer more Konoha-nin will show up."

Gaara fell silent at that, and looking past Temari I could see the confusion spreading over his face.

"You're... helping me?"

"Of course we are," Kankuro said as he slowly pulled Gaara to his feet, slinging one of the redhead's arms over his shoulder.

"Why?"

Both Temari and Kankuro flinched at that, and neither one answered immediately.

"'Cause they're your family, you idiot!" I yelled out. "You are one of their precious people, and they should be yours too!"

"He's right, little brother," Temari said as she finally lowered her fan and supported Gaara from opposite Kankuro. "We aren't going to abandon you."

Gaara looked between them, his confusion giving way to wonder. His gaze turned back to me after a moment, his expression shifting into a more neutral mask. "Uzumaki... Naruto... I won't forget this."

Before I could say anything else, Temari and Kankuro jumped away, taking Gaara with him.

As they left, something inside me seemed to give way and I felt myself falling forward. Someone caught me before I could hit the ground, but my vision was too fuzzy to see who it was. I could still hear him, though.

"Not bad, dobe..."

* * *

><p>I came to in a hospital room, staring up at a stark white ceiling. I could hear rapid movement back and forth in the hallway outside, and the gentle breathing of someone – multiple someones, actually – sleeping nearby.<p>

As soon as I sat up to see who it was, though, the world turned gray.

**Checkpoint "Chuunin Exams Victory" Reached.**

**Saving Progress...**

I felt a grin spreading across my face. I wasn't sure what the checkpoint thing was, but I knew what "Saving Progress" meant. The fact that I was in the hospital and not at Ichiraku's Ramen Stand also meant that I hadn't died, and that I had made it farther than I ever had before, including my very first life.

**Congratulations on surviving the Chuunin Exams Invasion!**

"Hell yeah!"

**You have now completed the tutorial and are ready to step out into the world!**

"... what?"

That didn't sound right. No, that sounded _wrong_. I knew what a tutorial was; Iruka-sensei made me sit through enough of them. But, that... that didn't make any _sense_!

**If you want to review any of the explanations and tips provided during the tutorial, they can all be found under the Hints menu.**

"... what? What Hints menu? There is _no fucking Hints__** menu**__!_" I yelled. The thought that there was supposed to be an explanation for all of this, that something was supposed to guide me through all of this and _didn't... _I felt something stab into my palm, and looked down to see that my hands had curled into fists and my fingernails had lengthened and sharpened enough that they had pierced through my skin.

**The following locations are now available: **

**Mission Room**

**Hospital**

**Training Ground**

**Forest of Death, Outer Ring**

**In addition, the Teachers menu is now available at the Academy and the Options menu is now available at the Apartment.**

"... the Academy?" I asked hoarsely, shock rapidly defusing my anger. "I was supposed to go to the Academy?"

I tried to remember the last time I had set foot in a classroom, or anywhere in the building even, but I had avoided that place like the plague. Iruka-sensei was awesome and had helped me out a lot, but he'd threatened to string me up and let the students use me for target practice if I came back and played even _more _pranks on him and the other teachers.

That other stuff sounded important, but I couldn't get over that last line. I'd had so many problems figuring out just what the hell was going on, and the whole time – the _whole time _– all I needed to do was go back to the Academy? Hell, that even made a sick kind of sense. Where else would I go to learn something? I'd even relied extensively on Iruka-sensei, an _Academy teacher_, yet I'd avoided the actual building completely.

Wait. No, that wasn't right. The written exam part of the Chuunin Exams was there! What the hell? Why hadn't I seen anything then?

**You are now able to recruit characters. Many people would be willing to fight at your side and support you, but some will be much more difficult to recruit than others, while some will require strange or unusual conditions to be fulfilled before they will join you. Keep in mind personality conflicts and opposing goals as well, for not all of your potential allies will get along!**

That managed to drive thoughts of the Academy out of my mind.

"Other people? Other people are part of this too? Who? How do I recruit them?"

As usual, I received no answers.

**A guide is available for those who wish additional help or tips beyond the tutorial. Do you want to enable the guide now?**

"_Yes!_" I shouted. Finally, something to give me some real answers!

**Guide enabled. You may change this setting in the Options menu.**

The moment the words disappeared from my head, I thought something had gone horribly, terribly wrong. All I could hear was laughter – deep, rumbling, echoing laughter that seemed to issue from nowhere and everywhere all at once.

"... not crazy. I'm not going crazy." I muttered to myself.

The laughter trailed off slowly, fading in intensity until the gray world was silent once more.

"**You actually managed to survive... took you long enough, human," **a voice said, startling me. It was a lot like the laughter I'd just heard, deep and rumbling, and the way it said the words made me feel like I'd just been insulted.

"Who is that?"

"**Try to keep up, human. You just enabled the guide, so who else would I be?"**

"... you don't sound like a very good guide." I replied.

"**I'm not allowed to lie to you, human, and watching you bang your head against the wall, while quite amusing, does grow stale after a while. I almost feared that you would remain mired in this situation forever, but you managed to pull through in the end, even if you had to rely on my power to do it."**

"Your... power?" I asked, my voice squeaking at the end. The only powers I'd used were my own jutsu, Gamabunta, and... "No."

The gray world suddenly gained a bit of color as something red appeared outside the window. It shifted rapidly for a moment, the color uniform yet oddly reflective before it turned black. The black stayed for a moment before the red began bleeding in again around the edges, then the object drew back further still until it revealed a burnt orange something that I instinctively knew was fur.

I watched in growing horror as the Kyuubi, somehow free of its seal and fully manifested, continued to back away, its tails lashing back and forth and casually destroying buildings as it moved. Once I could see most of its form through the window, the creature paused. A dark grin spread across its snout, its large white teeth gleaming in the sun, then it opened its mouth and began forming some sort of sphere between its gaping jaws.

"No. Nonononono," I gasped, shaking off my fear. I looked around the room to find Sakura and Sasuke both sleeping in beds, frozen like the rest of the world. I ran to Sakura's side, desperately trying to pick her up so I could get us all out of here before the Kyuubi killed us all, but my hands passed through her form like she wasn't even there.

"Nonono." I looked out the window again, just in time to see the Kyuubi unleash its attack, sending a blinding blast of energy screaming towards me. I closed my eyes and braced myself, expecting to die in the next few moments, and felt... nothing.

The laughter was back, the sound of the Kyuubi's amusement nearly deafening. I opened my eyes to find myself still standing in the hospital room, no sign of the destruction it had just caused remaining.

"**It's almost too easy," **the Kyuubi said, still laughing to itself.

"What the fuck was that?" I screamed.

A miniature version of the fox appeared sitting on the windowsill.

"**An illusion. An hallucination. A joke, even. You'd think after dying four times you wouldn't fear death so much. You are immortal, in your own strange, limited way."**

"I'm _what_?"

"**Well, you are and you aren't. It'll be interesting to see what you become, in time."**

"The fuck does that even mean?"

The fox's head tilted, and its red eyes narrowed in annoyance.

"**Your stupidity can be tiresome, human. I almost regret that you had to suffer so long without help." **The fox smirked. **"Almost."**

"... what did you do?" I growled. My mind was still reeling from all of the shocks it had sustained, but if there was one emotion I could focus on, it was anger.

"_**Technically**_** you were supposed to be receiving helpful explanations and hints throughout this so-called tutorial," **the fox said offhandedly, waving one paw through the air dismissively, **"but that seemed awfully boring. I decided it would be better if you had to make do without that. How fortunate for me that you didn't enter the Academy."**

"Why?" I yelled, stepping forward and leveling a glare at him.

The fox narrowed its eyes again. **"Because I found it amusing. What more reason do I need?"**

I lunged at the fox, my hands stretched out to throttle the bastard, but my hands passed right through it.

"**I'm an illusion, idiot," **it said, shaking its head in disgust.

I wanted to pull out my hair in frustration, but I tried to calm myself. Anger wasn't getting me anywhere.

"You can't lie to me, you said?"

The fox's eyes widened and its mouth dropped open. **"You remembered something I said more than five seconds ago!"**

I forced my fists to unclench and took a deep breath.

"Is there anything else you hid from me?"

The fox grinned widely. **"You were more than amusing enough as it was. Besides, as imbecilic as you are, if any other information had been withheld you might have been stuck in that tutorial forever."**

"Are you actually going to help me?"

"**Of course," **the Kyuubi answering, managing to look affronted at the suggestion.

I paused for a second at that, surprised. Then I shook myself, remembering what I was dealing with.

"_How _are you going to help me?"

"**By providing the opportunity for you to gain direct experience and first-hand knowledge. Oh, and my boosting your self-confidence through the realization that you can provide entertainment to superior beings."**

I took a moment to translate that in my head. "You're going to help me by... not telling me anything and laughing at me?"

The Kyuubi actually looked proud. **"It's beautiful, isn't it?"** Then it began laughing, the sound echoing from all around me again as its form vanished.

I barely noticed as the world returned to normal, though I _did _notice that the room seemed a little chilly... and drafty.

There was a stirring in the bed behind me. "Naruto? When did you- _kyah!_"

I whirled around, trying to identify the danger that had caused Sakura-chan to scream. I couldn't spot anything, just her sitting up in bed. She was wearing a hospital gown and was currently looking away, her hands covering her face.

"Sakura-chan, what-"

"Put some clothes on, you idiot!" she yelled, still not looking at me.

I looked down, noticing that I was also dressed in a hospital gown. I paled as I realized that the garment didn't close all the way in the back and that someone had removed the rest of my clothing... _all _of it. My face turned red and I darted back to my bed, pulling the sheets suspended from the ceiling that served as privacy screens closed as I did so.

The Kyuubi just continued to laugh.

* * *

><p>I managed to escape the hospital not long after that – fully clothed, thankfully. I say escape since I wasn't exactly supposed to leave just yet, but I had way more important stuff to worry about than what some stupid doctor had to say.<p>

I went straight to the Academy, feeling a little weird to be going back. There was still a lot of activity over at the stadium, and the few ninja I saw were moving quickly and looked rather serious. I didn't hear any fighting or anything, but I guess there was still a bunch of other stuff to deal with.

Ah well, not like it had anything to do with me. I kicked Gaara's butt and kept Sasuke from getting himself killed, so my job was done.

I'd no sooner walked in the front door of the Academy than I saw what I was looking for.

**Lessons**

**Hints**

**Teachers**

The words were hovering directly over the secretary's head, but no one else seemed to be paying any attention to them.

"Hints," I said.

The secretary started to look up when I spoke, but the world froze and turned gray and she stopped moving.

**Hint #1: These hints will provide useful explanations for how the world of Naruto works. For more comprehensive information, please consult the manual.**

**Next - Done**

"... there's a manual somewhere... that I'll probably never see," I muttered. "Figures. Next."

**Hint #2: The menus can only be accessed from certain locations. Apartment and Academy are the only ones available during the tutorial, but you will be able to unlock others as you progress!**

I growled as I heard the Kyuubi laughing again. The bastard had screwed me over from the very start, it seemed. If I'd seen this hint I would have known to come to the Academy and I would have known what the hell was going on.

"Next."

**Hint #3: Character progress is permanent. This means that even if you die you will keep all experience, items, skills, medals, etc. that you have collected. Note: Key Items and Unique Items are not retained.**

"Kinda already figured that one out," I grumbled. So far this wasn't helping me much. "Next."

**Hint #4: Experience points are awarded for defeating enemies and overcoming challenges. **

"OK... next."

**Hint #5: The experience granted for defeating an enemy depends on your relative levels. Fighting enemies who are a higher level will provide significant experience gains, while fighting enemies who are lower level will provide minimal experience.**

"So _that's _why it's taking me so long to level up now... well, now that I've passed the Exams I'll definitely be able to fight stronger people, so that shouldn't be an issue. Next."

**Hint #6: Challenges provide a set amount of XP, but only the first time they are completed. **

**Hint #7: Some challenges will provide additional bonuses or awards if they are defeated before you reach a certain level. You will never be penalized for being too high level for a challenge, however.**

"... huh," I muttered, not quite sure what to make of that. I guess I could just try everything I could as soon as I could, but I'm not exactly eager to end up dying and having to start over again. "Next."

**Hint #8: If you are having trouble, try completing the Lessons. They will explain key elements such as Skills, Attributes, Traits, and more! Lessons can be accessed from the Academy at any time.**

"... fucking Kyuubi," I growled again, which just started the bastard off laughing again. I guess I knew what I would be doing after I got through all of the hints. "Next."

* * *

><p>I stumbled out of the Academy, my head pounding as I tried to sort through all of the information I had found. So much of what I had been struggling with finally made sense.<p>

For instance, I now knew how to get an explanation for any of the abilities or traits I had access to – all I had to say was the word "details" – though nowhere was there any mention of how I could know what skills would be unlocked in the "trees." or what other traits would show up. I now knew for a fact that I got a skill point every level and a trait point every five levels, and that I got one stat point every level that was randomly assigned. I even knew what those stats did, now, along with things like Hit Points and defense ratios and critical hits and... ugh.

The "Teachers" menu had really confused me, though. There were three names listed – Anko Mitarashi, Kakashi Hatake, and Jiraiya – but only Jiraiya's name had a little arrow by it and nothing I said or did changed that. I'd also found out – "details" again – why some of my skills went up even when I didn't put any points in them. Oh, and how I could raise skills and what they did in combat and how certain abilities required certain skills and... ugh again.

And that was just the Hints! I'd originally planned to get through the Lessons as well, but I'm pretty sure my head was already on the verge of exploding.

I must have spent hours going over everything, trying to make sense of it all and see how it tied back to what I had experienced before. Hours, and yet when I was finally done and the world returned to normal, the secretary finished looking up and acted like nothing strange had happened. Hell, the sun was still hanging high in the sky when it should have been dark by now.

Apparently it hadn't even been an hour since I left the hospital, but I just wanted to go back to my apartment and sleep.

"Naruto?" I heard a familiar voice ask. I glanced up to see Shikamaru paused nearby, a concerned look on his face. "I thought you were still in the hospital."

I made a disgusted face and shook my head. "No way am I sticking around there. It's _boring_," I told him.

"Weren't you severely injured fighting that Gaara kid when he went nuts and transformed? Sasuke and Sakura had to carry you back, and I saw Kakashi rush all three of you to the hospital."

"Me? Nah... I kicked his ass," I said, waving off his concern. Sure, my body had felt a little painful in places, but I was fine now. "I was just a little tired afterward is all."

Shikamaru opened his mouth to say something, then abruptly stopped and narrowed his eyes. "That was you. You were the one fighting the Ichibi."

"Well, yeah. Who else can summons Toads?"

He didn't say anything for a minute, just looking at me with an expression that was anything but lazy. It was actually kind of creeping me out a bit.

Before he snapped out of whatever it was he was in, Kakashi-sensei appeared next to me.

"There you are, Naruto," he said, settling one hand on my shoulder. Strangely, his orange book was nowhere in sight.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei!" I called out cheerfully.

Rather than responding, he sighed and his hand tightened on my shoulder. "You haven't heard, have you?" he asked quietly.

"Heard what?" I replied, my smile fading. I saw Shikamaru's expression tighten out of the corner of my eye before he looked away abruptly, his fists clenched.

"Heard what?" I repeated, a sick feeling settling into my stomach.

Kakashi-sensei knelt down until he was eye-level with me, his expression solemn.

* * *

><p>I broke one of the hinges off my door as I threw it open, but I didn't care.<p>

"Checkpoints!" I shouted the moment I entered the kitchen.

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

I stumbled to a halt, frozen in disbelief. It wasn't there. "Nonono. Cancel. Checkpoints."

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

"Bullshit!" Why wasn't it there? I'd just spent four different lives doing that fucking tutorial over and over! "Cancel! Checkpoints!"

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

How was I supposed to fix this if I couldn't go back?

"Cancel. Checkpoints," I repeated, lurching sideways until I came up against the wall.

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

What fucking victory?

"Cancel. Checkpoints." I slowly slid down the wall and drew my knees up to my chest.

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

The stupid thing was broken again.

"Cancel. Checkpoints."

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

"Cancel. Ch-"

"**You're getting annoying, human."**

"Checkpoints."

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

"**Repeating that over and over isn't going to change anything. There _are _no checkpoints before that."**

"Cancel. Checkpoints."

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

"**What does it even matter, anyway? So one of you useless wastes of flesh died. All of you are going to die in the end. If you're lucky, it will be at my hand."**

I slowly looked up to see the fox sitting on the table, its nine tails waving in the air behind it.

"**Are you done now? Finally."**

"It's your fault."

The fox blinked, looking surprised at that. **"Oh? This I have to hear."**

"You hid all that information from me, kept me from figuring things out sooner. If I had known how everything worked before, I could have done something."

"**Ha. You? You were lucky to have survived at all, human. In fact, you faced Orochimaru several times before. He wasn't even taking you seriously and still killed you three different times."**

"If I'd known I could have-"

"**Died again and accomplished nothing. You are a weak, pathetic human being. Your only redeeming quality is that you are blessed to be my container. Without me, you would be less than nothing."**

"Bullshit! I-"

"**Have relied upon my power for every meaningful victory. That ice ninja. Orochimaru. Suna's jinchuuriki. Always you call upon my power to prevail in the end."**

I tried to say something, anything to prove him wrong, but I couldn't. Every time I'd really gotten in trouble I had tapped into the Kyuubi's chakra and pulled my way through. I couldn't even summon Gamabunta without using the bastard's chakra.

"**I am not without benevolence, however," **the fox said, smirking. **"As you have proven to be somewhat amusing, I could be convinced to allow you to continue using my power... **_**if**_**... you bow before me now and admit your weakness, admit that you are **_**nothing**_** without me. If you grovel well enough, I may even deign to provide further information as well."**

I stared at the fox, my arms tightening around my legs painfully as I tried to rein in my emotions. I had lost Hokage-jiji, but by using this bastard's power I did manage to protect Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme, and probably a bunch of other people too. Like Haku, I would be more than willing to die to-

Haku.

I lowered my head and rested it against my knees as I tried to think clearly. The first time around I'd needed to rely on the Kyuubi's power to beat Haku, but this latest time I hadn't needed to do that at all. In fact, I'd managed to save Haku's life, along with Zabuza's, and this bastard hadn't had anything to do with it. Same with Orochimaru – I may have gone berserk when I saw Sakura-chan lying there and called on his power, but it was the Army of One ability that allowed me to survive that encounter, not the Kyuubi. And sure, I needed the Kyuubi to summon Gamabunta now, but Jiraiya could summon him without that. I bet I could do the same eventually. I just needed to work at it.

My frown deepened. What did using the Kyuubi's power really get me, anyway? Other than when I used it to summon Gamabunta, I ended up losing myself and just attacking wildly. That was the exact opposite of what both Kakashi-sensei and Anko-sensei had been pounding into my head.

"**Why such hesitation? 'Tis a small price to pay for the means to protect your 'precious people', is it not?"**

I looked to the side, noting the words still floating in front of my refrigerator.

**Characters**

**Level Up**

**Inventory**

**Log**

**Options**

I idly noted that I had gained another level at some point – not surprising, given how close I had been before the exams. It was the last item that I was interested in though. "Options."

**Hints – Disabled**

**Guide – Enabled**

**Notifications – Disabled**

**Auto-Level – Disabled**

"**What are you doing?"**

"Maybe you're right," I said quietly. "Maybe I am weak. Maybe I am worthless. But it's like you said – you didn't provide me any help. That means that I'm getting stronger, and I'm doing it without you."

"**Human," **the Kyuubi snarled, springing to its feet. Its tails were waving wildly behind it, and before my eyes it began to grow larger, swelling to fill more and more of the kitchen.

"The way I see it, I can use your power whether you want me to or not. You've denied me everything else, so I bet you would have kept that back too, if you could. Hell, you've made it clear you'd be happy if I was dead, and yet here I am."

"**Do not test my patience, human," **the Kyuubi growled threateningly. **"I may have allowed you to live because you have amused me, but that can always change."**

"Then kill me," I said simply, climbing to my feet. The fox paused, looking surprised. "I've already died, remember? Several times, and yet I'm still here. And you are still stuck in my gut." The room was silent for several seconds. "Well?"

"**Are you truly so eager to die? I could stretch your demise out for weeks, making you scream for mercy while I-"**

"Blah blah blah," I said. "Anko-sensei is scarier than you are, fuzzball. Unlike you, she can deliver on her threats."

The fox stilled for a moment before its eyes began to glow and it _roared. _I clapped my hands over my ears, my head ringing painfully as the sound assaulted my senses. It lasted for nearly thirty seconds, but the pain gradually diminished as I adjusted. I looked up to find the fox seething in front of me, saliva dripping off of its teeth as it snarled inches from my face. Even knowing it wasn't real, I still flinched backwards.

It smirked suddenly.

"**You forget, human," **it said. **"I have witnessed everything that you have. I know what drives you. I know who your precious people are. You should take care, lest the next time you call upon my power you find that it is not your enemies whose blood stains your hands."**

"Guide. Disable." I said quickly, trying to ignore the rapid beating of my heart. The fox disappeared suddenly, leaving the kitchen empty and gray. It couldn't _really _do that, could it? I mean, if it could control me like that, wouldn't it have done so before?

I really, _really _hoped that was true.

* * *

><p>The next two days passed by in a haze. I went to Jiji's funeral, and it seemed like pretty much the entire village was there too. There were a lot of speeches and all that, but I can't say I really remember any of them. After that, everyone seemed really busy repairing the village and taking missions.<p>

Kakashi-sensei said that the team was off of active duty currently. Once Sakura and Sasuke were cleared from the hospital, he was going to split what free time he had between them until missions picked up again. He would have started with me already, but told me that Ero-sennin wanted me for something first.

I tracked down the old pervert – at the bathhouse, again – and he told me that he had a mission for me, and to make sure I was ready before I took it. Then he shooed me away and went back to peeping.

I thought that was a little odd, actually. I mean, if it was important enough that I couldn't work with my team or my teacher, shouldn't we be heading out immediately? Well, he did mention we'd be traveling, so maybe he meant I should pack first?

Yeah, that made sense.

I was heading back to my apartment to do just that when I ran into Shikamaru again.

"Hey, Naruto," he said as he walked up to me. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Uh... sure? I've got to head out for a mission soon, but I can talk for a bit."

He just nodded and started walking, heading towards the training grounds. I followed after him, wondering what he wanted. We didn't exactly hang out a lot, after all.

He finally came to a stop in one of the more secluded training grounds, then stretched out on the side of a small hill and tucked his hands behind his head.

"I heard that you and Sandaime-sama were close," he said quietly. "I'm sorry for your loss."

I looked away, swallowing thickly. Part of me wanted to run back to my apartment to try looking for an earlier checkpoint one last time, but I squashed it quickly.

"Thanks," I muttered.

"I've heard a lot of rumors about what happened out in the forest. It's pretty clear that Gaara was the jinchuuriki for the Ichibi no Tanuki, and that Suna originally planned for him to transform in the middle of the village. If Sasuke hadn't pierced his sand cocoon, that could have happened, it seems."

I nodded, wondering where he was going with this.

"There aren't any official reports, but everyone saw Gamabunta fighting the Ichibi."

I nodded again.

"And then they saw the Kyuubi show up for a few seconds."

I started to nod, then froze. Shikamaru sat up and turned to face me, his expression carefully neutral.

"Why was Gaara so interested in you, back in the Tower?"

I forced out a laugh, shifting on my feet and scratching the back of my head. "W-who knows? I mean, he _was _pretty crazy, after all. Who knows why he did anything?"

Shikamaru just looked at me for a few seconds, then nodded to himself.

"After seeing just how powerful Gamabunta was, I asked my dad about summoning contracts and how they worked."

I breathed a little sigh of relief as he changed topics.

"They're really rare, maybe two or three dozen in all of the Elemental Nations, and most of them are considered lost. Konoha has three active ones, the Slugs, the Toads and the Monkeys. It's really impressive that Jiraiya-sama picked you as his successor for the Toad Summons. Congratulations."

I felt a grin stretching over my face. I knew Toads were awesome, but I hadn't known it was _that _big a deal. "I'm the future Hokage!" I boasted. "Ero-sennin just knows a good thing when he sees it!"

"It's also really impressive that you have the chakra reserves to summon the Boss. According to my dad, there are only a handful of people in Konoha who could do that without completely exhausting themselves. Even some skilled jounin don't have the raw amount of chakra needed for that."

I laughed quietly, starting to feel a little embarrassed. It wasn't often that someone pointed out my accomplishments like this. While I was laughing, Shikamaru stood up and faced me from a few feet away, his hands in his pockets and his shoulders slouching forward.

"I was curious, so I looked into what it would take for someone our age to have reserves like that."

My laughter trailed off and I started feeling nervous again.

"According to the sources I checked, it isn't possible. Human bodies simply can't hold that much chakra until they reach adulthood."

Yeah, definitely nervous.

"H-heh... I guess I proved them wrong, then, huh?"

"It took me several hours to put it all together, to convince myself that I wasn't making a mistake in my logic."

My mouth suddenly felt very dry and my hands were starting to shake. "Hey, Shika, that's great. But, I've got this mission I really need to get ready for, so-"

"Naruto. I know."

"Kn-know what?" I knew what he was going to say, but I really, _really _didn't want him to say it. What was going to happen now? Would he tell everyone else? Would Sakura-chan and Sasuke start looking at me like Mizuki had? Even Iruka-sensei had hated me because of the Kyuubi at first, and he'd known from the beginning. What were the odds everyone else would see it the same way he did?

"That you're the jinchuuriki for the Kyuubi."

There was no way to avoid it now. He knew. Had he led me all the way out here so he could try to "finish the job" like Mizuki had? That didn't seem like something Shikamaru would do, but then I hadn't thought that Mizuki-sensei was a traitor, either.

"So?" I growled, tensing. I was ready to move the moment he made a threatening gesture.

His eyes widened slightly, but all he did was shrug and look away. "Troublesome...," he muttered to himself. "So nothing," he said to me. "It's supposedly some big secret and everything, but I think that's stupid. Maybe some idiots would somehow confuse you with the Kyuubi, but I'm not one of them and I don't think any of the others are either. I'm not going to pretend to know what it's like, but I thought you deserved to know that I don't care about it at all. You're still you."

"Oh." I honestly hadn't expected that. My jaw worked for a moment. "... thanks," I said finally, my voice hoarse. I looked up, wondering where all these rain drops were coming from. The sky seemed pretty clear right now...

Shika shrugged again, his gaze fixed on some point off to the right. "I'm not going to tell anyone else or anything, just so you know. I'm not sure if they'll work it out on their own or not, but I wouldn't be surprised if some of them suspected something," he added. "I have to admit that I'm impressed that you managed to keep it a secret for so long. You never so much as twitched when the topic of the Kyuubi came up."

"I didn't know," I told him, rubbing my sleeve across my eyes, grateful to move on to even a slightly different topic.

His head whipped around so fast I thought I heard his neck crack, his jaw dropping open. "You didn't... you didn't _know_?" That seemed to shock him for some reason. "When did you find out?"

"The night after I failed the graduation exam."

He stared at me for several seconds, then his jaw closed with a snap. "When Dad said it was a secret, I just assumed...," he trailed off, shaking his head. He was silent for a few more seconds, then, "Is that why you've been getting stronger so quickly? Now that you know, you can use it like Gaara can? Not the same way, obviously, but, you know, do things with it?"

"Uh... yeah, in a way," I replied.

Shika nodded again, his eyes turning skyward. "Is that where you got that new clone technique?" he asked offhandedly, as if he was talking about the weather.

"Nah, that's- er."

He lowered his gaze back to me, looking curious, then he shrugged again. "It's alright if you don't want to tell me. I actually feel kinda bad about how I handled the whole Kyuubi thing now. I didn't think you would take it like that. 'Course, I thought you'd known for a long time, too..."

I drew in a deep breath and then let it out slowly as I thought. Should I tell him about what was going on? I'd tried with Jiji and Kakashi-sensei but they just stopped listening after a while. I tried to tell Sakura-chan, but she didn't believe me. I hadn't even said anything to Anko-sensei about it, but she still started acting like she forgot all about it despite that.

On the other hand, he was being really cool about the whole Kyuubi-in-my-gut thing, and the worst that could happen is that he wouldn't believe me, like Sakura-chan.

So I told him. I laid out the whole situation from start to finish, weird abilities and waking up at Ichiraku's and all. Partway through he had crouched down and made that weird circular handsign like he did when fighting Temari – I think Chouji had mentioned that was his "thinking pose" – but he didn't interrupt.

When I was done, his eyes stayed closed and he was silent for several minutes. When they opened again, all he said was, "I need to see your apartment."

* * *

><p>I led him into my kitchen and pointed at the words floating in front of my refrigerator. "There they are," I said, turning to him. "What now?"<p>

Shikamaru scanned the room slowly, his expression neutral. "I don't see anything."

"What? But- they're _right there_! It says characters and-" I cut off as the world turned gray around me. "Dammit... I keep doing that."

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Shikamaru Nara**

"... ok, that really does feel weird," Shikamaru said from beside me.

"Yeah, it takes some get-" I froze, turning to look at him. He was still scanning the kitchen, but there was a definite look of curiosity and anticipation about him now. More than that, unlike everything else that had turned gray he still looked completely normal. "You're still here? You can move? Wait, it listed your name!"

"So it did," he said, a small grin on his face. "Shikamaru Nara."

We both waited for a moment, but nothing happened.

"Hey, why isn't it doing anything?" I asked, confused.

Shika, on the other hand, looked like he had just figured something out. "I think for the same reason I couldn't see anything – you are the one that controls... whatever this is. You say it."

"Shikamaru Nara," I tried.

**Shikamaru Nara – Genin**

**Level: 9**

**Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 2,391/10,000**

**Teacher: Asuma Sarutobi**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 4**

**Precision: 15**

**Toughness: 8**

**Vitality: 5**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: 10/10**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 36/41**

**Taijutsu: 1/1**

**Abilities: **

**Kage Mane (*)**

**Link (2)**

**Split Kage Mane (4)**

**Traits:**

**Nara (Bloodline)  
><strong>

**Ninjutsu Affinity**

**Medals: **

**Precision Medal x2**

**Toughness Medal x1**

"Why only those jutsu?" he muttered.

"Hey!" I yelled, pointing an accusing finger at Shikamaru. "How come you're level nine? I'm only level... er...," I trailed off, realizing that I still hadn't looked at the "Level Up" menu since the end of the exams. I'd been distracted by other things and I hadn't exactly felt like doing much of anything ever since I heard about Jiji.

"Level...?" Shikamaru prompted.

"I don't actually know what level I am right now. I've got a level up pending. I was only six last time I checked, though."

"I see. Why don't you take care of that now, then?"

"Alright. Cancel. Level up."

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has achieved Level Nine!**

"Holy crap," I muttered. I'd jumped all the way to nine already?

**Naruto Uzumaki has fifteen (15) skill points to assign.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select three (3) new abilities.**

"Just how long has it been since you did this?" Shikamaru asked.

"Uh... since just before the third phase started?"

"You got three levels in _four days_? Why aren't you much higher than that, if it happens so quickly?"

"I don't know! I was just short of level seven last I saw!"

"Well, what did- ah. I think I see...," Shikamaru said, his eyes closing.

"See what?"

"I'm not certain yet. For now, why don't we take care of this?"

"Skills," I said, shrugging. I had known Shikamaru was smart, but it was really starting to sink in just _how _smart he was. I'd had a long time to wonder about this stuff, but he was picking up little things I still didn't understand like it was nothing.

**Fuinjutsu – 4  
><strong>

**Genjutsu – 6  
><strong>

**Kenjutsu – 1**

**Ninjutsu – 37**

**Taijutsu – 17**

"Interesting...," Shika muttered, "your totals are higher than mine. With the fifteen points you still need to assign... over half again what I have at the same level."

I hadn't noticed that at all. Then again, I hadn't been paying that much attention, as I was still overwhelmed by the fact that this was happening at all.

"Uh... that's because the teachers give bonus points. I may have skipped over that when I explained everything, sorry."

Shikamaru nodded slowly. "I think we need to go to the Academy after this. In fact, I think we need to go to the Academy _now_."

"Huh? But I thought that I was going to-"

"You said that you had a lot of problems figuring out how things were working, right? And it only started making sense after you got out of this tutorial thing?"

"Well, yeah..."

"And also that there was an entire set of lessons that you didn't even look at?"

"I get it, I get it," I said. I was torn between getting annoyed at Shikamaru's relentless logic and excited that I had somebody that smart helping me with all of this. I was _finally _getting somewhere, and I didn't have to do it alone anymore!

That by itself was more than worth it.

Then I remembered what I was doing before Shika found me.

"Ah, crap," I groaned. "I don't have time to do that. I'm supposed to be going on a mission with Ero-sennin. I should actually be packing right now."

Shikamaru closed his eyes and sighed. "Troublesome... Well, we could hit the Academy and see if I can at least access that piece on my own. If not, we'll just have to figure something out."

"Alright," I shrugged.

~ Scene Break ~

"They're right there," I said, pointing at the words floating in the air above the secretary... who looked up, confused.

"Yes? Can I help you?"

"My friend was just explaining where I could go if I needed any help," Shikamaru said smoothly.

"Oh, alright then," she replied, smiling. "Is there anything you needed right now?"

"Not right now, thank you."

The secretary smiled and went back to whatever it was she had been doing, and Shikamaru turned back to me. "Still can't see them," he said quietly. "I think that's going to be true wherever we go. Where else are these things supposed to be?"

"Uh... my apartment and here are the only ones I've actually seen. I think it said something about the training grounds, the hospital, the mission room, the Forest of De-"

"The _Mission Room_?" Shikamaru asked sharply.

~ Scene Break ~

"Hey, Naruto, Shikamaru," Iruka-sensei said, smiling as he looked up from his desk. "What are you guys up to?"

"Uh, just looking around."

"Our teams aren't meeting right now, but we thought we'd come by and see if there was anything we could help out with," Shikamaru added.

"That's great!" Iruka said, his smile widening. "Well, all the available missions are on that desk over there, feel free to pick one out." He frowned slightly and turned to me. "Naruto, you're supposed to be going with Jiraiya on a very important mission. Don't keep him waiting too long."

"Uh... I won't?" I answered, distracted by the words over Iruka's head.

With a firm nod, Iruka waved us away and went to work.

"Do you see anything?"

"Yeah..."

**Missions**

**Records**

**Promotion Test**

"But why is promotion test-"

**Promotion testing is currently unavailable. Konoha requires a sitting Hokage before any testing can be performed. Hint: Try completing more missions.**

"So promotion test is one of the options?"

"Yeah, along with missions and-"

**Available Missions:**

**Jiraiya's Search – Help Ero-sennin locate Konoha's future Hokage! Rank: ? Reward: ?**

"_That... _is getting really annoying," I growled.

Shikamaru nodded. "I think we need to be very careful about what we say from now on... or at least you do. I'll try to come up with something for that. In the meantime... is that really what you are about to do?"

"How should I know? Ero-sennin didn't tell me anything about that."

Shikamaru frowned. "Then how...?" He crouched down, his hands going into that circle thing again. While he was doing that, I canceled this menu and went into the records.

**Completed Missions: **

**D-ranks – 15**

**A-ranks – 1**

"A-ranks."

**Protect Tazuna  
><strong>

"Huh... Protect Tazuna."

**After convincing the Hokage to finally assign them a C-rank mission, Team Seven began their journey to the Land of Waves while escorting the bridge builder, Tazuna. Before they even reached the coast, however...**

My eyes widened as the entire course of the mission was laid out. It didn't mention every single detail, but everything it said was spot on, including the fact that Zabuza and Haku had escaped. When it finally ended, I noticed that Shikamaru was standing straight again. Rather than looking calm or annoyed like he usually did, however, he looked a little worried.

"When did Jiraiya-sama tell you to be ready to leave?"

"Uh... he didn't give a specific time."

"Did he tell you where to meet him?"

"... no, he didn't," I said slowly, trying to follow where Shikamaru was going with this.

Shikamaru didn't look surprised, but he also didn't look any less worried.

"Try going into the Missions again, and saying the name of the mission."

"Alright... cancel, missions, Jiraiya's search."

**Are you ready to start the mission? Note: you will not be able to return to Konoha for the duration of the mission. Note: You currently only have two characters in your party. You may have a maximum of three for this mission. The mission may be more difficult to complete if you begin without a full party.**

"Say no," Shikamaru said quietly.

I swallowed and nodded. "No."

**Available Missions:**

**Jiraiya's Search – Help Ero-sennin locate Konoha's future Hokage! Rank: ? Reward: ?**

"Cancel," I said without any prompting from Shika. After the world turned back to normal, we both turned and walked out of the mission room. My feet automatically started leading me in the direction of my apartment, and neither of us said anything for the entire trip there. Only once we were inside and the door completely closed did that change.

"What the fuck was that?" I screamed, grabbing my hair. "What the _fuck _is going on? Why am I having to go to the Mission Room to start missions, and why can I say no like that? Does Ero-sennin know something? Is that why he didn't tell me where and when to meet? And why-"

"Naruto!" Shikamaru barked loudly, cutting off my rant. "Calm down. I don't know what's going on either, but we _are _going to figure this out. Now then, let's just take a step back for a moment and think about this."

I dropped into a chair at my kitchen table, watching him intently. He was doing that hand-circle thing again.

"You confronted the Hokage and Kakashi with this information, and they seemed to be accepting until they abruptly stopped talking about it and forgot the entire thing. The same thing seemed to happen to Anko Mitarashi when you were experimenting with your Army of One technique. Is that right?"

"Yeah, it was really weird."

Shikamaru nodded. "And now Jiraiya-sama is assigning missions to you, but the only way you can actually accept them is through these floating words. Did that happen before?"

"Well... no, but there weren't any words in the Mission Room before. And besides, Kakashi-sensei was the one actually doing all the mission stuff."

"Did anything at the Academy mention missions?"

"Yeah," I replied. I remembered that one clearly since it didn't have anything to do with- oh. "Uh, it said that I could accept new missions at the Mission Room. I thought that one was kinda stupid, but..."

Shikamaru nodded again, like I had confirmed something. "I really want to spend more time at the Academy, but the mission to find our next Hokage is too important and there's no way Jiraiya-sama will wait for long. There's something else it said that piqued my interest, though. 'You can have a maximum of three members in your party.' You also mentioned something about recruiting, and I think it's obvious that you recruited me... somehow."

"Yeah, I guess I did, didn't I? I kinda thought it'd be more... obvious. Like go all _congratulations_, or something," I said, trying to make my voice sound deep. Shikamaru snorted in amusement at my attempt to mimic how the words felt when they were shoved into our heads.

"In that case, I think the first thing we need to do is recruit another person. If you can only have a maximum of three, that means you have room for one more. I would suggest-"

"Sakura-chan!" I yelled, jumping to my feet. "Maybe that's why she didn't believe me before! Because I was still in the tutorial!"

"You tried to tell Sakura about all of this?" Shikamaru asked, his eyes wide. "Troublesome... I'm surprised the entire village isn't filled with rumors about how you've gone crazy."

I jumped to my feet and slammed my hands on the table. "Hey! This is totally happening!"

He held up his hands defensively. "I know it is, but you have to admit its a little... strange."

I calmed down, feeling a little embarrassed at overreacting again. "Yeah, I guess it is. But what does me telling Sakura have to do with that?"

He shook his head. "She's almost as bad about gossiping as Ino. I hadn't heard a peep from either of them, though, so I guess Sakura kept this to herself." He shrugged. "Still, are you sure you want to recruit her right now? It sounds like this mission could be really dangerous."

"Hey, Sakura-chan's gotten a lot stronger. She beat Chouji without any problems!"

Shikamaru frowned. "Chouji didn't know about her poisoned kunai," he said defensively. "If he'd known about that, things could have gone very differently. He's a lot stronger than people think."

"So you want me to recruit _him_, then?" Chouji was cool, but no way was he stronger than Sakura-chan.

Shikamaru shifted, his eyes drifting around the room. "No," he admitted. "Ideally we could recruit one of the jounin, but it seems like whatever this is is restricted to people our age. Given that, Sasuke might be our best bet. He should be recovered enough to get out of the hospital, and it sounds like our mission is just going to be traveling for a while."

I growled. "Why would we want him over Sakura-chan?"

"Sasuke is the strongest genin I can think of that's still on his feet. That Lee kid might have been better, but he's definitely not well enough to leave the hospital. _Maybe _Neji Hyuuga, but somehow I don't think you two would get along right now"

"Hell no," I snapped. "I may not do anything else to him, but he's still an ass. And who says I want to work with Sasuke?"

Shikamaru frowned. "He _is _on your team, and he managed to hurt Gaara and kept him from transforming in the middle of Konoha. Do you think Sakura could have managed that?"

"... maybe?" He just looked at me, and I shrugged uncomfortably. "OK, probably not. But still, does it have to be him?"

"Can you think of anyone else?" I opened my mouth. "That's stronger than he is." My mouth snapped shut again.

"Fine," I mumbled, giving in. "Let's go recruit Sasuke."

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry, dear, but Uchiha-san isn't well enough to leave yet."<p>

"Is it something serious?" Shikamaru asked, his voice filled with concern. Who knew he cared about Sasuke that much?

The nurse shook her head. "No, nothing like that. He's just strained his chakra network and fractured a few of his bones. We're keeping him around for observations for a few more days while he finishes healing up."

"When do you think he'll be cleared for missions?"

"Oh, not for at least another week," the nurse said firmly.

"What about Sakura-chan?" I asked.

"Haruno-san was released earlier today. I think she's already back home."

Shikamaru shot me an annoyed look when I flashed the victory sign.

"So, looks like we get to recruit Sakura-chan after all," I said as we walked back towards the entrance of the hospital. Shika didn't look happy, but he didn't say anything else.

We had just made it back to the lobby when it happened.

The first sign that something was wrong was when Shikamaru stumbled to the side. "Hey, wha-" he started to say.

The second sign was when I saw a flash of white from the corner of my eye, moving so fast that I couldn't make out anything but a blur.

The third sign was when something rammed into my ankle and it exploded in pain.

I dropped to the ground with a yelp, my hands cradling my poor, abused joint. "What the hell was..." I started to ask, then trailed off as I saw who was standing in front of me.

"_That_," Chibi said loftily, lifting her nose in the air and tossing her head to the side, "was for calling me chibi." She glared at me, her arms crossed and one foot tapping on the floor.

It would have been a lot more effective if we weren't more or less at eye-level, despite the fact that I was sitting on the floor.

"Did you just... kick me in the ankle?" I asked. I wasn't even all that upset, really; Anko-sensei had done far worse and more painful things just because it amused her. I was just torn between annoyance that she seemed to think it was her right to do so and surprise that she'd gotten the drop on both me _and _Shika. She may be small, but she was also _fast_. "Why?"

"I just _told _you," she growled. "My name is Hanabi Hyuuga, not 'chibi'. You are not permitted to address me in such a demeaning manner."

I heard a sound from Shikamaru, but when I looked over he was looking back down the hallway we came from, his hands stuffed in his pockets. I thought I saw his shoulders shake for a moment, but I may have imagined that.

I turned back to Chibi and slowly stood up, maintaining eye contact even as I did so. I wasn't exactly tall, but I still had a good forty centimeters on her. That spark of annoyance was growing larger, but I couldn't maintain it for long. She was matching me glare for glare, but from this perspective it really felt like I was bullying her. I let the tension drain out of my shoulders and closed my eyes for a moment.

"Look, Chibi, I don't me- _yeow_," I yelped, tumbling back to the floor again as more pain flared in my ankle – the _same _ankle.

She stepped closer until her face was inches from my own and she reached out with one hand to poke me in the forehead, a tap emphasizing every syllable as she spoke. "Ha-na-bi Hyuu-ga."

Shikamaru made a strangled noise from behind me, and both Chibi and I turned to look at him. His shoulders were definitely shaking, but he just waved us off with one hand.

I turned back to find Chibi still glaring at me, her finger poised to poke my forehead again. It was quite close to my eye, actually, which was making me a little uncomfortable.

"Look, Ch...," I trailed off as the finger twitched, getting _way _too close to my eye, "Hanabi-chan," I corrected smoothly, "I'm not trying to be mean or anything. I didn't think you really disliked it that much."

She relaxed marginally, stepping back and crossing her arms again. "Well I do," she said firmly. "It is not proper for the heiress to be addressed in such a manner."

I shrugged. "Whatever," I said as I pulled myself to my feet again. My ankle was still hurting a little bit; I think she hit the bone directly that second time. "I won't call you that anymore if you don't want me to."

"Good," she replied, nodding firmly. She hesitated for a moment, then said, "I saw your battle against Neji. You... are surprisingly skilled. You do not comport yourself in the manner of a powerful ninja."

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?"

"She meant that you are very good at hiding how strong you are, a valuable skill for any ninja," Shikamaru said as he rejoined the conversation.

I grinned, rubbing the back of my head. "Yeah, I am awesome like that."

Chibi was looking at Shika, a small frown on her face, then she turned back to me. "Yes. I apologize if my words were misconstrued."

"Miscon... what?"

"She didn't mean for you to take it the wrong way," Shikamaru answered, a frown on his face as he stared at Chibi.

She was looking at him again and fidgeting a little, then looked away. "Yes, that."

"Ah, don't worry about it Ch- Hanabi-chan," I said, waving off her apology. "I didn't mean for you to take me calling you Chibi the wrong way either, so just forget about it."

She gave me a really strange look before her eyes shifted to Shikamaru. Whatever she saw caused her to frown again, but when I looked over Shika just had his normal lazy expression on his face.

"So...," I began, trying to find another topic to talk about, "were you here visiting Hinata again? I thought she would be out by now..."

"No, my sister was released weeks ago," she replied. "Father is here to see someone and wanted to introduce me to them. They are still talking, but I decided to wander around for a bit."

"Ah," I said. "Well... that's good, I guess."

She just shrugged. "It's because I'm the heiress," she said, sounding bored.

I didn't really get that, but it didn't sound like she wanted to talk about it, either.

"Naruto, the mission?" Shikamaru said quietly, motioning towards the clock.

Oh, right. Ero-sennin was probably getting really annoyed with how long I was taking. "Sorry, Hanabi-chan, but we need to get going. There's this super important mission that we need to head out on."

She looked at me, her expression reminding me forcefully of how her father had looked after he caught us fighting over that notepad. "Really."

"Hey! It is!"

"What is it, then?"

"Finding the next Hokage!" I declared proudly, just as Shikamaru piped up with, "Classified."

I turned to him as he wiped his hand over his face and muttered, "Troublesome..."

Hanabi stared at me, her face growing red and her mouth twisting into an angry scowl. "Fine then. Go on your _important mission,_" she snapped, stalking off without another word.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked.

Shikamaru just sighed. "We'll figure it out some other time. Right now we need to get moving."

"Right," I said, setting aside whatever was up with Chibi for the moment. "To Sakura's house!"

* * *

><p>"Absolutely not," Sakura's mother said.<p>

"What? But, she's my teammate!"

"I know that, and when your jounin instructor says that you are ready to take missions again, she will be there. Until that happens, I forbid it. My daughter was just released from the hospital and is still resting. I will not have her gallivanting around, especially not on a child's say-so."

"Let me at least talk to her!" I said.

"I _said _she is resting. She doesn't need any disturbances right now. Good day," she said firmly, then shut the door.

"Hey!" I yelled, pounding on the door. "What the hell, lady?"

"Come on, Naruto," Shikamaru said, pulling me away.

"But, I didn't even get to talk to her!"

"Do you really think she's going to charge off on a mission that could take who knows how long in direct contradiction to what her mother says? Especially seeing as she _just _got out of the hospital today, and her mother has a valid reason to be worried?"

"We're ninja now!" I argued. "We're supposed to be adults!"

"And she's still living at home, isn't she?"

"But... dammit!" I growled. "Who are we going to recruit now?"

"Chouji," Shikamaru said firmly. "I'm serious when I say a lot of people underestimate him, and I would trust him with my life."

I looked over at him, annoyed that we couldn't take Sakura-chan, but nodded. Chouji was cool with me, and if Shika was willing to go that far I wasn't about to argue with him. "Alright."

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry dear, but Chouza just took Chouji out for an overnight training trip. He wanted to spend some time with him and demonstrate some of the techniques he'll be working on in a less... fragile environment."<p>

Shikamru grimaced, but nodded. "Thanks, Akimi-oba-chan."

He turned and slouched away, and I followed after him. "Well, what now?" I asked.

"We could ask Ino...," he muttered, then shivered. "But honestly that just sounds incredibly troublesome. Aside from Chouji, I can't think of anyone I'd want to work with on such short notice." He paused, and I noticed his eyes tracking to the side. After a moment, he shook his head and continued walking.

"What?" I asked, looking around.

"I thought I saw... nevermind."

"Alright... so what are we going to do?"

Shikamaru shoved his hands into his pockets and slouched forward, plodding along the street. "I think you head back to your apartment, take care of leveling up, then meet me at the Mission Room. I need to head back home for a bit. I have to figure out how I'm going to tell my Dad that I've been recruited for a mission with Jiraiya-sama."

"You... you don't have to come," I offered hesitantly. "I mean, if it's going to get you in trouble, I can-"

"Troublesome...," he muttered. He stopped walking and turned to look at me. "Look, Naruto, I realize that we didn't hang out all that much in school, but I'm not just going to abandon you. Whatever is happening to you, to _us _– hell, to the entire world, for all I can tell – is huge, and you deserve better than to have to deal with it alone."

I grinned at him, smiling so wide it made my face hurt. He just shuffled his feet and looked away again, muttering, "Troublesome...," under his breath.

* * *

><p>I made my way back to my apartment, feeling lighter and more energetic than I had in days. Even if I had lost Jiji, things were beginning to look up. In fact, with Shikamaru's help, I bet we could figure out how to save him, too.<p>

"Level up," I said as I walked into the kitchen.

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has achieved Level Nine!**

**Naruto Uzumaki has fifteen (15) skill points to assign.**

**Naruto Uzumaki may select three (3) new abilities.**

"Ski-"

"What is this? What's happening?" I heard a panicked voice call out from somewhere else in my apartment.

I whirled around, my eyes widening. I knew that voice, but what was she doing here? I stepped out of the kitchen to find her standing just inside my apartment, the door still half open behind her.

Chibi looked at me, her eyes wide. "What did you do to me?" she yelled. "Why is everything gray?"

I stared at her for a long moment, then stepped back into my kitchen. "Cancel. Characters."

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Shikamaru Nara**

"... you have _got _to be kidding me."

"_What_ _is that_?" Chibi yelped as she followed me into the kitchen. Her tone was getting more and more frightened, and for once she sounded as young as she actually was, rather than the miniature adult she tried to act like.

"Cancel," I said again, allowing the world to go back to normal.

Some of the panic bled out of her frame as everything gained color once again.

"What are you even doing here?" I asked. "Why are you in my apartment?"

She startled, looking around for a moment as if just realizing where she was. "N-Never mind that!" she snapped, crossing her arms. "Explain what that was!"

"Hanabi...," I said warningly.

She huffed. "I thought you were making fun of me," she admitted, "acting like I was gullible enough to believe a genin would really have a mission that important."

"Hey! I wasn't lying!" I told her, offended. Then I shook myself. "What does that have to do with you being here, though?"

"I was going to show you the error of your ways," she declared. "Public humiliation seemed appropriate."

"You... you were going to _prank _me?" I asked, stunned. "_Me_?"

Chibi tossed her head again and sniffed. "A Hyuuga does not engage in such crude activities."

"_Me_?" I muttered again, still stuck on that. I didn't get pranked! I pranked other people!

"Regardless," she said firmly. "Now that I have explained, tell me what that was!"

I let go of that issue for the moment – prank _me? – _and looked over to the words floating in front of my fridge.

"Don't freak out," I told Chibi gently. "Characters."

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Shikamaru Nara**

She jumped, one hand coming up to her temple as she looked around the room. Despite that, though, she didn't seem to be panicking this time.

"Why is my name part of that?" she asked pointedly, her eyes narrowing at me.

Nope. Definitely hadn't imagined the last few minutes.

"Great... _just _great," I muttered to myself. "Alright, Hanabi-chan, have a seat," I said, motioning to one of the chairs. "This is going to take a while..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I imagine that most of you are familiar with the concept of "RPG Time," where the world is perfectly willing to put itself on hold while the hero scampers about the countryside, picking daisies and catching butterflies (I'm looking at _you, _Skyrim!) I played around with using that concept in my head, but ultimately I felt that it made things a little too easy. Once Shikamaru figured it out (and he would, in less than a week), they'd just abuse the hell out of it and bulldoze everything by overleveling. Amusing for a bit, death for the story long-term.**

**Instead, all the missions and whatnot operate on timers. Take too long and the mission either goes away or changes in some fashion. There is a minor concession to RPG Time, however, in that time is only granular to the day level. As long as they take a mission on a given day, it doesn't matter if they pick it up at 6 AM or 11:59 PM.**

**That's also where the durations come in, as standard missions will last X±Y days. One group can't do everything.**

**A pause of sorts does exist, but only via the menus, which are all in pre-determined locations. Naruto can't randomly pause the game out in the field to work in Hax that way. Much like with infinite time, it's far too easily abused. They're going to have to work for their 'sploits.  
><strong>

**I wouldn't worry too much about them not taking the time to visit the Academy, either. They've got plenty to work on already, and now that they know how to find out more about the skills, abilities, and traits that they have, enough information to make some informed decisions.**


	7. Life Five: Shadows of Ninja

"... and then you showed up here."

Chibi just stared at me for several seconds, her face set in the same blank expression she had worn for the last hour. Then, "And you actually expect me to _believe _any of that?"

I let my head fall onto the kitchen table with a dull thump. I mean, I understood that it sounded a little... ok, very insane, but that was without any of the proof I was able to offer.

"Pretty much, yeah," I muttered. "How else do you explain all this?"

Chibi huffed in annoyance. "I would have said some sort of genjutsu, but everything looks the same to my Byakugan and I can't detect any chakra."

"See?"

She shot me an annoyed look and huffed again. After a few seconds, she suddenly said, "Those profiles! Show me these character profiles. If mine is even remotely accurate, perhaps I'll believe that there is something to what you are saying."

"Fine," I muttered. Honestly, though, I had to admit I was a little curious myself.

"Hanabi Hyuuga."

**Hanabi Hyuuga – Academy Student**

**Level: 9**

**Rank: N/A**

**Experience Points: 2,391/10,000**

**Teacher: None**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 4**

**Precision: 11 (22)**

**Toughness: 6**

**Vitality: 7**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: 1/1**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 1/1**

**Taijutsu: 16/51**

**Abilities: **

***Dodge (5)**

**Narrow Escape (4)**

**Traits:**

**Hyuuga (Bloodline)**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

"Sixteen? Out of_ fifty-one_? My taijutsu is not that pathetic!"

I stared at her for a moment, then sighed. "Do you even know what those numbers mean?"

"I know it's too low!" she countered immediately.

I dropped my head to the table again. "I thought you didn't believe any of this?"

She was silent for a moment, and I looked up to see her mouth working as she tried to come up with a reply. "Look Hanabi, I get that this is crazy, but I've been stuck living in this for a while now. Given that we're even talking right now, you're stuck in this too. I don't like it and I can't explain it, but it's real. You can deny it all you want, but it doesn't change the fact that you're going to have to deal with it sooner or later."

I absently rubbed my stomach as I said that, grimacing slightly.

Chibi looked like she was going to argue for a minute, then just dropped back into her seat with a sigh. "Fine," she said, pouting. "So what now?"

"Now I finish leveling up, then meet up with Shikamaru. We're supposed to be going on a mission." I gulped suddenly. "Ero-sennin is going to be _pissed _that I've taken this long to get ready."

* * *

><p>I hurried to the Mission Room, Chibi trailing along behind me curiously. I tried to tell her to go home, but she just told me that she didn't have to be back until later that evening anyway. Letting that go for the moment, I started looking around for Shikamaru. I had to wait another ten minutes for him to show up, and I was constantly looking over my shoulder expecting Ero-sennin to appear at any second.<p>

Shikamaru didn't look hurried at all as he strolled in, his hands tucked into his pockets and his shoulders slouched forward. He looked startled when I ran up to home and started shaking him back and forth.

"What took you so long? Ero-sennin's going to kill us for making him wait all day!"

He just stared at me, looking confused. "What are you talking about? It's been twenty minutes at most. Anyway, my Dad actually seemed happy I had a chance to accompany Jiraiya-sama. He told me to watch him carefully and learn everything I could. He even told me to," Shikamaru trailed off, shuddering, "_work hard, _so I know he was being serious."

I barely registered his words. Twenty minutes? I must have been talking to Chibi for an hour, at least, and that didn't even cover the time it had taken me to get here. How could it have only been... twenty...

"Holy shit," I breathed, my eyes wide. How had I _missed _that?

Shikamaru instantly straightened up, his eyes alert and scanning the room. "What? What is it?"

"Missions," I said, causing the room to turn gray and _everyone to stop moving_.

**Available Missions:**

**Jiraiya's Search – Help Ero-sennin locate Konoha's future Hokage! Rank: ? Reward: ?**

"It works here too?" Chibi said, looking around curiously. "How come everyone is gray and we aren't?"

Shikamaru jerked, turning to stare at her. "When did _this _happen? How did you recruit her? More to the point, _why _did you recruit her?"

"What's that supposed to mean? Why wouldn't he want to-"

"Hey!" I shouted, causing both of them to turn to me in surprise. I pointed at the mission desk, where Iruka was in the middle of handing a scroll over to another ninja wearing a chuunin flak vest.

They both turned to look, then back at me. "What? What's wrong?"

"They aren't moving," I pointed out.

Shikamaru nodded. "I know, that happened at the Academy too."

"No. They _aren't moving. Nothing _is moving."

He started to nod again, then froze, his eyes slowly growing wider. He began to walk towards the table, his head scanning the room as he went. Chibi moved next to me, looking confused.

"Why_ aren't_ they moving? Is something wrong?"

"No, this always happened before and it's never been an issue. It's just... I don't think I really got what that actually meant until just now."

"Why? What's the big deal?"

I watched Shikamaru try to reach out and grab the scroll from Iruka's hands, only for his hand to pass right through it. He started testing everything else, the scrolls on the table, the table itself, the ninja, the walls, everything. From what I could see, he could touch the building and the furniture, but nothing else. Even that seemed a little inconsistent, because I could swear I saw his hand touching the table at one point and then passing through it at another.

Then he tried to pull out a kunai, only for his hand to pass right through the pouch. I blinked, then tried to grab one of my own kunai. Sure enough, I couldn't grab one either.

Chibi tried to do the same, only for her hand to pass through my kunai holster, the kunai inside it, and my leg. We both yelped and jumped apart, looking a little wide-eyed.

"Troublesome..." Shikamaru muttered as he wondered back to us. He reached out his hand, passing it back and forth through my shoulder without any resistance. "We can't touch each other, the other ninja, or any loose items. We can't even touch the furniture if we intend to move it."

I frowned. "Back at the apartment, didn't we-"

He nodded. "Yeah, moved chairs and opened doors. Without further testing I would say it's because everyone present was part of whatever this is. This seems designed to prevent us from changing anything when the world is frozen."

His eyes narrowed as he looked over my shoulder and I spotted the open doorway. He marched toward it and tried to go through, but just before he would have crossed the threshold he bounced back and stumbled.

"Troublesome..." he repeated, sighing as he reached out and pressed his hand against thin air. "And we can't leave while the world is frozen either. It seems we are confined to this room."

He turned back to me, his eyes narrowed. "You asked me why I took so long when I first got here. Why?"

"I spent at least an hour explaining everything to Ch- Hanabi-chan, and it probably took us another ten minutes to get here. And then you said it only took twenty. I didn't get it until I realized that it was like this," I said, gesturing at the gray world around us, "the whole time me and Hanabi-chan were talking."

Shikamaru frowned. "I really should have seen this sooner, but... freezing _time_ _itself_? Just what is going on here? How is that even possible?"

I shrugged while Chibi's jaw dropped open and her head started whipping back and forth as she looked around the room as if seeing it for the first time. We were all quiet for a while before Shikamaru grinned.

"I think we'll have time for the Academy after all," he said.

* * *

><p>"Lessons."<p>

**Lesson One – Levels**

"... that's it?" Shikamaru asked, frowning. "That can't be it. The hints all said lessons, plural. The _name_ is plural, even."

"Maybe you have to do them in order?" Chibi offered, shrugging. After a moment, Shikamaru nodded and turned to me.

"Lesson one, levels."

The world shimmered and we suddenly found ourselves sitting in a classroom, the three of us in the front row while all the other seats were empty. Everything was in color now, and at the front of the room stood Iruka-sensei, a wide grin on his face.

"Uh... Iruka-sensei?" I asked. "Weren't you just at the mission room?"

"Today, class," Iruka said, ignoring me completely, "I'll be helping you learn and apply the basic knowledge you'll need to succeed in the ninja world."

"Iruka-sensei!" I yelled, waving my hand in the air.

"To start with, you need to know about levels."

"I don't think that's actually Iruka," Shikamaru said, his eyes narrowed.

"Every enemy you face has a level. Some will be higher level than you, some lower level than you, and some even the exact same level."

"It's not," Chibi said, her Byakugan activated. "It's not anybody. I don't know what it is, but I don't think it's a person. It's like I'm looking at someone's chakra network, but the lines are in all the wrong places and it's not really chakra."

"The levels of your enemies will generally increase as you progress through the world, though there is always the possibility that you will encounter a high level enemy at any time."

"So... what? It's a genjutsu?" I asked.

"A level serves to provide a general impression of how dangerous an opponent is, but don't rely on it exclusively."

"No, not even that," Chibi replied. "There would be chakra in that case. I don't know _what_ that is. We _are _in a classroom, though."

"Depending on the circumstances of the fight, the members of your party, and the abilities of the specific enemy, a battle could be easier or harder than you would expect based on level alone."

"So we just teleported from the lobby of the Academy to one of the classrooms?"

"Allied characters also have levels, which can be increased by gaining experience. Every character gains five skill points and one stat point every level.

"No," Chibi said, sounding confused. "It _looks _like the Academy classroom, but I can't see through the walls. I can at the real Academy."

"In addition, characters get a trait point every five levels, starting at level five."

"So where are we then?" I asked.

"This is the end of lesson one."

"I don't know, but I'm not sure it matters," Shikamaru said.

"You can continue with lesson two, which will explain the leveling up process."

The world shimmered again, and we were back at the lobby and everything was gray again. Shikamaru let out a small sigh of relief. "Nothing has moved. I was worried that time was moving while we were in the lessons, but it looks like it isn't."

**Lesson One – Levels**

**Lesson Two – Leveling Up**

"We have to go through these one at a time, don't we?" I asked, dread in my voice. "I already knew everything in that lesson."

"Would you rather quit now and risk missing something important?" Shikamaru asked pointedly. Despite his words, though, he didn't look all that excited either.

"No," I grumbled. "Lesson two, leveling up."

* * *

><p>"Lesson ten, missions."<p>

The world shifted again, but this time we were standing in the Mission Room rather than the classroom. Iruka was there again, though no one else was around.

"At a certain point in your ninja career, you will be able to accept missions on your own," Iruka explained. "Missions are offered and accepted at the Mission Room. Each mission has a rank, duration, maximum team size, and general description. Some missions will have specific parameters that will present unusual success or failure conditions.

"Missions fall into three broad categories: common, special, and vital. Common missions are ranked D to A, and cover the entire range of possible jobs you will encounter as a ninja. The vast majority of your income and growth will come from common missions. In terms of duration, common missions can last anywhere from one day to one month. Some common missions are recurring, meaning that they will either always be available or show up at regular intervals.

"Special missions are ranked B to S, and are only available when certain circumstances have been met. These missions are never recurring, and their duration is always unknown. Due to the unusual nature of these missions, it is sometimes possible for multiple teams to accept the same mission.

"Vital missions are assigned by the village itself, and, as the name suggests, are essential to the continued growth and prosperity of Konoha. Failing such a mission can have dire consequences, but refusal to accept it may be even worse. The minimum and maximum team size on such missions is determined by the village.

"When accepting missions, the following conditions must be met.

"First, C- and B-rank missions must be led by a chuunin, and A-rank missions must be led by a jounin. Some special missions are an exception to this.

"Second, at least one member of the team must have a personal ranking equal to or higher than the mission ranking; this will generally be the mission leader, but it doesn't have to be. For special missions, all members of the team must have at least a B-ranking.

"Third, all members of the team must be Konoha ninja in good-standing with the village.

"Fourth, to take a solo mission, the ninja accepting the mission must have a personal ranking that exceeds the mission ranking – that is, to take a B-rank mission solo the ninja must be at least A-rank.

"Some missions are only available for a limited time. Each team may only take one mission per day, except for D-ranks, and the team must start the mission before the end of the day. That team will be unable to take a second mission until the first has been completed. The mission's listed duration serves as a guideline for how long that will be, although some missions may take more or less time to complete."

Iruka drew in a deep breath, then smiled. "Don't worry if it seems complicated, class. You'll get used to it in no time!"

The world shimmered again and we returned to the lobby. I turned to Shikamaru.

"I hope you got all that," I muttered. "He lost me at the special missions."

"I think I did," Shika said slowly, his gaze turning to Chibi. "I'm not entirely sure what to make of it, though. She's obviously caught up in this, but that lesson seemed to indicate that you have to be at least a genin to actually take missions."

Chibi huffed and crossed her arms. "So, what? I'm just supposed to twiddle my thumbs while you two run off and leave me behind?"

Shikamaru sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. "That doesn't make any sense either. If she can't take missions, what's the point in allowing her to be recruited? We can't recruit just anyone, either, else the Hokage and the jounin would already be part of this. If anything, they seem deliberately excluded."

I shrugged. "Maybe she's supposed to do stuff here." It seemed fairly obvious to me, after all.

"How?" she asked indignantly. "You are the only one who can actually do…" she waved her hand around, indicating the gray room, "_this_."

"How am I supposed to know?" I growled. "You know just as much about all this crap as I do!"

"You've been in this for months, at least!" she snapped back. "How can you not have-"

"Troublesome," Shikamaru groaned, interrupting our brewing argument. "We already know that there are good reasons why Naruto doesn't know these things," he pointed out, causing Hanabi to flush, "and it's not his fault that you can't take missions."

He turned to look at me, his expression unusually serious. "Like it or not, you _have _been part of this the longest. You may not realize it, but you have probably noticed things that the two of us haven't had a chance to. You're also the one who has _some _kind of control over what happens, whereas we don't. It can be a little… difficult, trying to adjust to that. You aren't exactly…" he paused, frowning slightly, "known for your responsible actions," he said finally.

"Hey! I can be plenty responsible!"

He just raised an eyebrow at me.

"I can!" I insisted.

"Do I need to start listing the pranks you've pulled over the years? I can think of a dozen off the top of my head, starting with painting the Hokage Monument."

"I don't do that stuff anymore!"

Shikamaru nodded slowly. "You don't, that's true. But you _did_."

I sighed, letting my shoulders droop. "OK, fine. Maybe you've got a point. Sorry, Hanabi-chan," I said.

She just looked away and muttered something under her breath.

"Besides," Shikamaru said, "it's not like you have to use these menus to do _everything_."

Both Hanabi and I turned to him curiously.

"Well, take what you were doing with Sakura, Kakashi, and Mitarashi. You were practicing and growing stronger while trying to figure out how your new abilities worked. Hanabi could do the same thing, only she doesn't have to worry about being ready for missions or anything else. In fact, she's a _student_; she _supposed _to be asking how things work."

My mouth formed a soundless "oh" as I processed that. That… that would help a lot, actually.

"She's also part of this now, so that alone could pay off down the line. Who knows what she'll see or hear that could prove to be important."

I turned to Chibi, who had a small frown on her face. "Can you do that, Hanabi-chan?"

She shook herself and turned to me. "Of _course _I can do that," she snapped. "It'll be a better use of my time than sitting through another boring class at the Academy."

"Now that that's settled," Shika said, "can we get to the next lesson now?"

* * *

><p>I stepped out of the Academy, Shika and Chibi following behind me, and looked around. The sun was still just beginning to set and the streets were still filled with people going about their days.<p>

"How long were we in there?" I asked Shika.

He was looking around too, an odd expression on his face. "Between the hints and the lessons? At least four hours." He raised his hand and pointed towards a large cart that was just turning the corner. "That cart was almost directly in front of the Academy when we went in. Accounting for time to enter and leave, essentially no time must have passed while we were reviewing the hints and lessons."

"That's really creepy," Chibi said, her eyes sweeping the streets. She frowned then turned to us again, crossing her arms. "So, are you going to leave on your _super important _mission now?"

"Technically, we still have a few hours," Shika pointed out. "However… I can't think of anyone else I would want to recruit right now, and I need to see some of this in action before I start trying to think long-term. Even if we just look at Naruto's Army of One technique, what we are told about it and how it actually works are very different. Not that what we're told is wrong, exactly, but there's a lot of little things that aren't mentioned."

Hanabi huffed again, looking away. If I didn't know better, I would think she was _pouting_.

"Fine then," she muttered, and started to walk off.

"Later, Hanabi-chan!" I called out. "We'll see you once we get back and tell you all about it!"

Hanabi stiffened and paused for a moment, then stomped off without looking back.

"Before we head to the Mission Room," Shika said quietly, "let's head back to your apartment."

* * *

><p>"Options."<p>

**Hints – Disabled**

**Guide – Disabled**

**Notifications – Disabled**

**Auto-Level – Disabled**

"So the Guide was the... the Kyuubi, right?" Shikamaru asked, his voice faltering a little as he named the bastard stuck in my gut.

"Yeah. Thing's a giant fucking asshole, too."

"Right. Still, it claimed that it had disabled the hints, which was part of the reason you had so much trouble. So why don't you turn them on? Notifications seems like it might be useful as well."

"Yeah," I nodded, agreeing. "Hints, enable. Notifications, enable."

**Hints – Enabled**

**Guide – Disabled**

**Notifications – Enabled**

**Auto-Level – Disabled**

"Done."

**Characters**

**Inventory**

**Log**

**Options**

I hummed to myself, scratching my chin thoughtfully. I'd already taken care of my level up, and Shika hadn't gotten one yet.

"Anything else?"

Shika nodded. "The lessons talked about teams and parties a lot... is there anything about that here?"

I studied the words for a moment, then shrugged. "Closest I see is characters."

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Shikamaru Nara**

"No," Shika sighed, "that's not it. Although I am curious about Hanabi."

I shrugged. "Hanabi Hyuuga."

**Hanabi Hyuuga – Academy Student**

**Level: 9**

**Rank: N/A**

**Experience Points: 2,391/10,000**

**Teacher: None**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 4**

**Precision: 11 (22)**

**Toughness: 6**

**Vitality: 7**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: 1/1**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 1/1**

**Taijutsu: 16/51**

**Abilities: **

***Dodge (5)**

**Narrow Escape (4)**

**Traits:**

**Hyuuga (Bloodline)**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

He choked for a moment, his eyes widening. "She's level _nine_? Didn't you just reach that a few days... wait. Can you go to mine again?"

**Shikamaru Nara – Genin**

**Level: 9**

**Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 2,391/10,000**

**Teacher: Asuma Sarutobi**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 4**

**Precision: 15**

**Toughness: 8**

**Vitality: 5**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: 10/10**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 36/41**

**Taijutsu: 1/1**

**Abilities: **

***Kage Mane (5)**

**Link (2)**

**Kage Haru (4)**

**Traits:**

**Nara (Bloodline)**

**Ninjutsu Affinity**

**Medals: **

**Precision Medal x2**

**Toughness Medal x1**

"And yours?"

**Naruto Uzumaki – Genin**

**Level: 9**

**Rank: C**

**Experience Points: 2,391/10,000**

**Teacher: Anko Mitarashi**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 8**

**Precision: 4**

**Toughness: 6**

**Vitality: 10 (15)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 0/4**

**Genjutsu: 6/6**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 34/37**

**Taijutsu: 19/32**

**Abilities: **

**Army of One (4)**

***Kage Bunshin Barrage (5)**

**Traits:**

**Jinchuuriki**

**Kami's Luck**

**Poison Resistance I**

**Will of Fire**

**Will of Fire**

"_Exactly_ the same," Shikamaru noted.

"That's... kinda weird," I said, rubbing the back of my neck.

"More like impossible," he replied, his eyes narrowed. "The only way for that to happen is if it was _forced _to happen. And... I'm not entirely certain what that means."

His fists clenched for a moment, then he sighed and turned to look at me directly.

"I think I'm beginning to understand how you felt before, and I have the benefit of your experience and all the lessons and hints. It's amazing that you managed to get as far as you did."

I shrugged uncomfortably, torn between feeling embarrassed at his admission and proud at the compliment. Finally, I opened my mouth to reply and-

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

-snapped my mouth shut just as quickly.

"Great," I muttered. "Another one of these."

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"Something else you left out earlier?" Shika asked sarcastically.

"Hey, I covered all the important stuff! I don't even know what the hell this thing does!"

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"Besides piss me off," I growled.

**An update is ready to install. Do you wish to continue?**

"Yes."

The weird blue bar thing appeared and disappeared again.

**Update complete. You may review the change log from within the Options Menu.**

"Options? I could have sworn it was help last time..."

**Hints – Enabled**

**Guide – Disabled**

**Notifications – Enabled**

**Auto-Level – Disabled**

**Change Log**

"And that _definitely _wasn't there a second ago. Change Log."

**-Update message now correctly states the location of the Change Log.**

**-Achievement descriptions no longer corrupted.**

**-Minor formatting corrections to character sheets. **

**-Assorted updates to rules; refer to Manual for more info**

**-Misc. typo and bug fixes**

Shikamaru made a sort of choking sound, and I turned to find him completely white and trembling. "Updates?" he whispered hoarsely. "Rules? The rules can _change_?"

"I guess," I shrugged. "Looks like stuff's getting fixed to me. I'm just glad this crap's finally starting to make sense."

Shika's color slowly improved, though his eyes still had a slightly wild look in them. "Let's... let's just go. I'm not sure I can take much more right now."

* * *

><p>"Missions, Jiraiya's search," I said clearly, and everything went gray.<p>

**Are you ready to start the mission? Note: you will not be able to return to Konoha for the duration of the mission. Note: You currently only have two characters in your party. You may have a maximum of three for this mission. The mission may be more difficult to complete if you begin without a full party.**

"Yes."

Nothing seemed to happen for a moment, then the world returned to normal and the door at the far side of the room opened.

"About time, brat," Ero-sennin said as he strolled in. He paused in front of me, looking me over critically before turning to Shikamaru. "As for you… the old farts decided it wasn't 'appropriate' to bring just one genin on a mission like this. They wanted to assign me some pissant jounin, but I argued them down to a chuunin." He pulled out a scroll and tossed it to Shikamaru. "Congrats, you're a chuunin."

My eyes lit up and I waited for him to pull out another scroll.

He didn't.

"There, now I've got a chuunin and a genin, so they can go suck eggs. Let's move out."

"Hey! What about my vest?" I yelled out while Shikamaru eyed the scroll in his hand like it was a venomous snake.

"You didn't make the cut, kid," Ero-sennin said bluntly.

"What? I kicked Neji's ass! I kicked Gaara's ass! I kicked ass period!"

"Yeah, you did," he said, smiling widely. "Showed everybody why Toads are the best. Unfortunately, the ability to kick ass isn't enough. Lazy over here showed," he coughed, and began imitating a thin, reedy voice, "'the discernment and rational thinking expected of a leader, as well as the ability to identify and pursue strategic objectives'."

He turned to look at Shika and nodded respectfully. "They've got a point. I saw the mission reports of your actions during the invasion – you managed to delay multiple jounin and chuunin long enough for reinforcements to arrive while also allowing Naruto and his squad to continue pursuing Gaara. That was solid planning, and took some serious balls to follow through on. You earned it."

Shikamaru sighed as he shuffled along behind us.

"Yeah, Shika kicked ass too, but why-"

Ero-sennin clapped his hands together sharply. "Alright, I was planning on giving you some training during this little mission, and we can start with this. I want you to think about those two situations and tell me what's different about them. You can't ask him for help on this one, either. Once you can give me that answer, I'll tell you what you need to do to get promoted to chuunin. Got it?"

"What? Why can't you tell me now?"

His eyes narrowed. "Do you expect everything to just be handed to you? I thought you were going to become Hokage one day. How can you expect to achieve that if you don't even know why you didn't make chuunin?"

"I don't need to be handed anything!" I snapped. "I'll figure out your stupid question and get promoted to chuunin with or without you!"

He smirked. "That's more like it."

* * *

><p>-Two Days Later-<p>

"What's all that stuff Ero-sennin keeps giving you, anyway?" I asked as I looked up from my Rasengan practice. I knew I was getting better, but I still hadn't figured out whatever trick it was that let Ero-sennin pop the balloon so easily. I hadn't even managed to pop the balloon at all, for that matter.

Shikamaru had several small scrolls and scraps of paper spread out on the small desk in the hotel room, and he'd spent the last thirty minutes pouring over them. He looked up at my question, frowning slightly.

"Coded messages, reports, rumors," he listed. "I think he's testing me – no, I _know _he's testing me. I'm supposed to figure something out from all of this, but I can't see it yet."

"Ah, you're really smart," I shrugged. "You'll get it."

Someone knocked at the door and I moved to open it. "Yeah, yeah," I said, pulling it open. "What do... you..."

I looked up, thinking for a moment that Sasuke had suddenly grown taller, then noticed the differences in the face and hairstyle. Not-Sasuke was wearing a black cloak with red clouds, and he was staring down at me with an activated Sharingan.

"Shika?" I asked slowly, unable to tear my gaze away from Not-Sasuke's slowly spinning eyes. "I thought Sasuke and Kakashi-sensei were the only ones who had a Sharingan."

"What are you-" I heard him start to say, then he cursed and I heard the chair he had been sitting in thud onto the carpeted floor.

Another guy wearing the same kind of cloak as Not-Sasuke stepped into view. He was really, _really _tall and had weird blue skin.

"Hmm... is this really the Kyuubi jinchuuriki?" the tall guy asked.

"Naruto-kun," Not-Sasuke said, his voice completely flat, "we would like you to come with us. Please step out of the room."

I still couldn't tear my eyes away, and I felt my leg moving forward without even consciously thinking about it. Not-Sasuke stepped back to give me room to leave, and I started moving forward.

Then froze in place.

Not-Sasuke's eyes narrowed, and my head started hurting even as I felt my leg moving backwards now. Not-Sasuke finally looked away, his gaze shifting behind me.

"It would be best if you didn't interfere," Not-Sasuke said, his voice still that really creepy monotone.

"Sorry," Shikamaru said, his voice thick with tension. I took two steps back, and one hand reached up to grab the edge of the door. "but this is just a little too troublesome."

My hand tried to slam the door, though it was blocked easily by Not-Sasuke. I whirled around and then stumbled slightly as whatever had been controlling me let go. I saw something dark flowing across the flow towards Shika, and it finally clicked.

"The windows," Shikamaru said firmly, his voice conveying an intensity I had never heard from him before. I nodded swiftly, scrambling over the bed and moving towards the only exit left in the room.

"Now we can't have that," the tall guy said, and I heard the splintering of wood behind me.

"Kage Haru!" Shika shouted as I leapt through the window, shattering the glass and wood as I burst through it. I heard him diving through the other window a moment later.

"What the?" I heard the tall guy call out, then I was hitting the ground and rolling to my feet.

"Run!" Shikamaru snapped from beside me.

I didn't waste any more time, bolting down the street as fast as I could. Shikamaru managed to match my pace, though he was already panting heavily from the exertion.

We ran for several minutes, dodging carts and crowds, cutting through narrow alleyways, running along the sides of buildings and even cutting through a few stores to emerge out the back. We stopped in a narrow alleyway, tucked into a small alcove that was well-hidden from the street, and tried to gather our breath.

"What was that?" I asked as my breathing evened out.

Shika shot me a dirty look. He was bent over with his hands on his knees, drawing in ragged breaths as he tried to recover.

"That..." he said slowly, "was Itachi Uchiha."

I blinked for a moment, then paled. "Sasuke's brother? The traitor?"

"Yeah. He's the only other person alive with a sharingan," Shika wheezed out.

"What the hell does he want with me?"

"We want you to come with us," came the flat voice from above us. I paled and looked up to find Itachi standing on the side of the building, his body still hidden by his cloak and and Sharingan eyes staring down at us both.

Shika made some sort of strangled sound from beside me, and out of the corner of my eye I saw the tall guy blocking the entrance of the alley, his hand resting on the handle of something that was slung on his back.

"I'm thinking," the tall guy said, "that if I cut your legs off you won't be running away again."

Shika was muttering something under his breath now, his eyes locked onto the tall guy. "...tice... eyma... ast... andm... aster." What the hell was all that?

His eyes flicked over to Itachi, and his face suddenly lost all color. "_All_..." he breathed out. "Troublesome, troublesome, troublesome," I heard Shika repeating under his breath.

I had no idea what he was going on about, but that didn't matter right now. I knew if I didn't do something soon, Shika was going to get killed and I was going to be taken off somewhere by the guy who had slaughtered his family and another guy who apparently liked cutting off people's legs.

Next time I saw Ero-sennin, I was _so _kicking his ass for this.

"Army of One, Kage Bunshin Barrage, Kage Bunshin Barrage," I snapped off quickly, pointing at Itachi and the blue guy in turn. That done, I focused and started pulling up as much chakra as I could; I needed something huge if I was going to get us out of this, and the biggest thing I had right now was summoning.

"Too slow," the tall guy said as he appeared next to me, swinging some sort of sword wrapped in bandages past me.

"Ha! You... missed..." I trailed off, realizing that I couldn't feel any of the chakra I had just been gathering up. "The fuck?" I shouted. For that matter, what the hell happened to my clones?

"My Samehada eats up chakra!" the blue guy boasted, hefting his sword.

"That's bullshit!"

"Kage Haru!" Shika shouted again. "Move it!"

I jumped back, avoiding another swing of the weird ass sword and followed Shika as he ran back towards the street.

Then the blue guy was in front of us again, his sword propped on his shoulder. He was staring at Shikamaru, though.

"Neat trick you got there. You're a Nara, right?"

Shikamaru remained silent, his eyes studying the blue guy closely.

"Yeah, definitely a Nara. Which means I don't have to keep you alive," he announced, the sword whipping through the air.

There was an explosion of smoke and a loud _clang_. When the smoke cleared, a large toad wearing some sort of armor was standing between Shika and the blue guy, the sword pressing against the toad's armguards. Ero-sennin was standing behind Shika, the woman he had dumped us to chase after earlier tossed over his shoulder.

Maybe I wouldn't kick Ero-sennin's ass after all.

"You don't seem to know much about me," he said slowly, grinning. "I'm better at getting girls than they are at getting me. Even though it doesn't seem like it, it's my specialty."

He flung his hand out, cocking his head back and pasting a wide grin on his face. "This Jiraiya-sama! This epitome of manliness!" he chanted. "I fall for no woman's wiles! When you're someone like me, you only have to flash that sexiness to have women fall at your feet!"

… no, definitely still kicking his ass.

"She barely had to look at you before you dropped everything to chase after her and now you're trying to act all cool, you perverted Sage!" I yelled at him.

"For the last time," he growled, "stop calling me that in public!"

"Screw that! Why don't you deal with those guys instead, Ero-sennin!"

"Ho... Jiraiya of the Sannin, is it?" blue guy said as he pulled his sword back. "I can't say I'm impressed. I didn't think something as simple as a woman would delay you for so long..."

Ero-sennin's face grew serious. "So... you guys really are after Naruto."

Wait, what?

"You knew they were after me?" I yelped. "Why the hell didn't you tell me?"

"To abduct Naruto..." Itachi said suddenly, "those were the orders given to us by the leaders of our organization, Akatsuki."

I froze as my mind processed that. Itachi Uchiha was after me, personally. Itachi Uchiha was part of an _entire organization_ that was after me, personally. Itachi Uchiha wasn't even the leader of the organization; in fact, he made it sound like he was one of the grunts.

This... this was bad. Itachi gave off the same crazy dangerous vibes that Orochimaru did, and the blue guy was just as bad. I tried to imagine a whole group of Orochimarus coming after me, and shivered. I'd already died four times because I interfered with what Orochimaru wanted to do. After getting that rubbed into my face over and over, I didn't imagine I would fare any better with a group of ninja on his level aiming for me directly.

Shika bumped into my shoulder, and I finally noticed that he had stepped away from Ero-sennin and the toad and was standing beside me, leaving the other three ninja facing off against each other. The toad was facing the blue guy, and Ero-sennin was glancing back and forth between Itachi and the other one, looking really serious and tense.

I swallowed nervously as they all started releasing killing intent, filling the narrow alley with a murderous feeling that pressed down on me like a physical weight.

"Your orders don't matter," Jiraiya said, his voice promising pain and death, "because right here, right now, I will-"

"_Itachi!_" someone screamed, and then all hell broke loose.

Blue Guy jumped forward, his sword dancing through the air and brushing against the toad that suddenly burst into smoke.

Jiraiya crouched, slapping his hands on the ground as he focused his attention on Blue Guy.

The shadows in the alley started going insane, crawling over the walls and suddenly seeming a lot darker and more menacing than before.

Sasuke – the one who had shouted – started running down the side of the building, his right hand clutching his left forearm and the chirping sound of the Chidori feeling the air. The wooden walls of the building crumbled as he charged, leaving a deep furrow down the side.

Itachi... just stood there, not even moving. His head turned, his eyes meeting mine and-

"_You are the Kyuubi!" Mizuki screamed, each word slamming into me like a hammerblow. Iruka was standing beside him, that same barely hidden hate that had been on his face the first day of class now boiling to the surface._

-I tried to look away but-

_Gaara's sand surrounded Lee, giving the enthusiastic genin one final moment of horror before it suddenly compressed._

-before I could-

_Shikamaru's face twisted into a sadistic grin. "I figured it out, you know. I've told everyone. And they all _hate_ you."_

-I-

_Neji's palm slammed into Hinata's chest, the flare of chakra emerging from her back. She didn't even flinch, just smiled sadly at her cousin, blood leaking from her mouth as her eyes faded and she collapsed._

-felt-

_Sakura lay crumpled at the base of the tree, her limbs twisted and broken and blood spreading around her in a crimson pool. Worst of all was her face; her eyes were open, staring at me as if to ask, "Why? Why couldn't you save me?"_

-something-

_I was standing on top of an empty void, a thin trail of splattered blood under my feet and stretching out before me. There was a baby crying somewhere, everywhere, nowhere, and I could hear people shouting and a loud roar I recognized as the Kyuubi's in the distance. _

_I looked back, only to see nothing, not even the thin trail of blood._

_I looked forward again, and saw Itachi standing sideways in the air, looking down at me with Sharingan eyes that weren't. His entire body was soaked in blood, dripping out of the red clouds on his cloak, his exposed hands, his hair, even from his eyes. _

"_Naruto-kun," he said. "I need you to-"_

-snap.

My world turned red.

* * *

><p>"<em>Oh, shit," I muttered as I found myself outside of myself once again. My body hunched forward, a low growl escaping its throat. Wisps of red chakra curled off of my form, and I knew without even looking that claws were growing on my hands and my eyes were changing shape and color.<em>

_Jiraiya and Blue Guy both stopped what they were doing and turned towards me, identical expressions of shock on their faces. Blue Guy sprang forward, his sword whipping towards me, and Jiraiya didn't do anything to stop him. _

_The sword passed through my body, drawing in the wisps of red chakra but not doing any damage. He avoided the swiping claws even as he attacked me with the sword several more times, his surprise giving way to anger._

"_What are you doing, you little shit?" he growled. _

_He was flying across the alley and slamming into and through the side of the building the next moment. Jiraiya was standing where he had been, one hand extended in a palm thrust and the other forming a hand-seal I didn't recognize. _

"_Snap out of it!" he yelled at me, his eyes constantly darting around as he tracked everything that was going on._

_There was a loud boom, and I looked up to see Itachi holding Sasuke's arm, the two staring at each other silently. Sasuke's face was grim, but Itachi still looked as calm and unruffled as always._

"_Pissin' me off," Blue Guy said as he stepped through the hole in the building. He rotated his shoulder and there was a sickening crack from somewhere inside his body, but he just grimaced and hefted his sword once again. One hand drifted towards the wrapping around the blade._

"_Kisame. Enough," Itachi said, looking away from Sasuke. Sasuke's face twisted angrily and he drew back his free hand, but Itachi used his grip on Sasuke's left arm to fling him off the side of the building towards the ground without even looking._

"_Tch," Blue Guy muttered, hefting his sword over his shoulder again and moving to join Itachi. _

"_Kage Haru! Kage Mane!" Shika yelled. I turned back to him and found that he was looking towards my body instead of at Itachi and Blue Guy. _

_It looked like my own shadow had extended from the ground, formed hands, and latched onto my feet. My body was twisting and turning as it tried to break free, and seemed to be gaining ground. Just as one foot broke free, however, shadows from all over the alley swept towards it and connected to mine. My body froze, a low growl escaping its throat, and Shika suddenly let out a sharp gasp of pain. _

_He had his hands locked in a hand-seal, all of his attention focused on me and sweat pouring down his face. He occasionally flinched or winced, but seemed to be holding steady._

"_Itachi!" Sasuke yelled as he picked himself off the ground, looking ready to charge back up the side of the building._

"_This situation is not advantageous," Itachi said to Blue Guy, turning to leave. "We shall withdraw for now."_

"Itachi!_" Sasuke screamed. There was something new in his voice, and when I turned and saw his face, I shivered. His eyes were wide and frantic, and his mouth was hanging open as he panted. He barely looked like Sasuke anymore, and I was having trouble matching this crazed expression with the collected, aloof Sasuke I was used to._

"_You, little brother," Itachi said, glancing over his shoulder, "are not yet worth my time."_

_With that, both he and Blue Guy disappeared._

_Sasuke looked like someone had just stabbed him in the gut as he fell to his knees, staring at where Itachi had been._

_Shika let out another gasp, this one pained, and I realized that my body was still straining against his shadows._

"_Damn," Jiraiya muttered, pulling back his sleeves and running through a short sequence of hand-seals. The tip of each of his fingers on one hand suddenly lit up, looking as if they had caught fire. That looked familiar to me, reminding me of what Orochimaru had done in the forest the first time._

* * *

><p><strong>Event "Red Dawn Rising" complete. XP: 2500; Bonus XP: 0<strong>

**Achievement Unlocked: Can't Touch This (20)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Once Was Enough, Thanks (50)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Pushing Buttons (0)**

**A new Special Mission has been unlocked.**

I blinked as I found myself back in my body just in time for Jiraiya's hand to slam into my gut, driving the air out of my lungs. I crumpled to the ground, wheezing.

"Damn it, Ero-sennin," I groaned as I clutched my gut. "The hell was-"

"Dynamic Entry!" someone screamed, and I looked up just in time to see Ero-sennin get kicked in the face by Lee's sensei and sent flying into a wall.

On the whole, I'd call that a fair trade.

* * *

><p>Once everyone was back on their feet, we'd moved to a different hotel and checked in. Ero-sennin and Lee's sensei were talking off to the side, leaving me with Shika and Sasuke. Shika was stretched out on the bed, on hand covering his eyes and looking for all the world like he was dead asleep; I didn't think he actually was, though. Sasuke was pacing back and forth in the small open space in the room, his fists clenched and shaking.<p>

"Why is _he _after _you_?" Sasuke demanded abruptly, whirling towards me.

I raised my hands in the air, waving them back and forth. "I don't know!" I insisted. "He just said he was ordered to abduct me!"

That was actually a good question, come to think of it. Ero-sennin obviously knew something, maybe even expected something like this to happen. Why me specifically, though?

"Maybe..." I said slowly, thinking hard. Sasuke stopped his pacing, looking at me expectantly, and Shika even stopped pretending to be asleep as he rolled over slightly and opened his eyes. "Well, I mean, Itachi's like a super-badass missing-nin, right? Er, crazy, evil, asshole missing-nin, I mean," I said, noting Sasuke's expression.

"Well, if he betrayed Konoha and is working for somebody else, then that somebody must hate Konoha too."

Sasuke didn't look like he was convinced, but he was still listening.

"If they hate Konoha, then they must want to hurt it. In that case, they must be after me because..." I trailed off, nodding to myself. Sasuke leaned forward slightly, his eyes widening. Shika was looking back and forth between me and Sasuke, a surprised expression on his face.

"I'm the future Hokage!"

Sasuke stared at me blankly, then wiped a hand over his face. "Ask an idiot, get a stupid answer," he muttered to himself. Shika just groaned, mumbled, "Troublesome," and went back to pretending to sleep.

* * *

><p>"Why's he gotta go back? He's out of the hospital now, right?"<p>

We had checked out early the next morning and were currently standing a mile or so outside of... whatever that town had been. I'm not sure I ever caught the name, come to think of it. Ero-sennin was ready to keep moving, but Lee's sensei was supposedly going to take Sasuke back to Konoha.

"Indeed!" Bushy Brow the Elder said, smiling, "Sasuke-kun has made a most youthful recovery. However, he let his Flames of Youth run wild and left Konoha without permission from his jounin sensei or the Mission Office. It's best he return before he finds himself in even more trouble than before."

I frowned. I mean, yeah, leaving Konoha without permission was one of those _bad things _that ninja were never supposed to do, but it wasn't like he was abandoning the village or anything. Sasuke was a jerk sometimes, but he'd never do something like that.

I glanced over at Shika, who was yawning widely and appeared to be trying to figure out how to sleep while standing up. Ero-sennin just looked impatient, Sasuke was back to his broody self, and Lee's sensei was practically hopping from foot to foot like he couldn't wait to start running all the way back to Konoha.

Part of me can't believe I'm about to do this, but...

"So what? He's here now, isn't he? Why can't he come with us?"

"Oi! Just who do you think is in charge of this mission, brat?" Ero-sennin said, looking at me with an annoyed expression.

"More people means we can search faster, right? Sasuke's got his stupid Sharingan, which makes things even easier. And this way it's like we've got a full team!"

Ero-sennin rubbed his face for a moment, then his eyes narrowed. "Alright brat, if you think you can call the shots, then you must have figured out the answer to my question, right?"

"Uh... what question?" I asked, stalling for time.

"Why you didn't get promoted to chuunin when Shika did," he said, his voice making it clear that he wasn't amused.

Well... crap. I hadn't really given that a whole lot of thought, especially once he'd shown me the Rasengan. The best I'd come up with was because Shika had used his shadows, which even I knew wasn't the right answer. Why was he even asking now, anyway? What did getting promoted or not have to do with Sasuke coming along?

"I'm not gonna wait all day," Ero-sennin said, smirking at me.

Well, he wasn't asking just for the hell of it. Ero-sennin acted like – no, he _was – _a pervert, but he was also a crazy good ninja. If he could come up with a puzzle that Shika couldn't figure out then he was really smart, too. So, what did getting promoted to chuunin, kicking ass in the exams, and deciding who got to go on a mission have to do with each other?

"Looks like you've got nothin', huh. Well, you'll figure it out eventually."

Dammit! What had Shika done that I didn't? For that matter, how was kicking Gaara's ass after he let his Bijuu out less impressive than staying behind to hold off enemy ninja while everyone else went... ahead...

Oh.

"Teamwork!" I blurted.

"That all you got?" Jiraiya asked, his voice neutral.

"Shika made the call to send part of the team ahead while he remained behind to hold off the enemy," I explained.

"And why did that matter?" Jiraiya pressed. Everyone was looking at me now. "Someone else could have done the same."

"Because..." I trailed off, running my hand through my hair in frustration. "He had to do it because... no one else _could _have done the same. He could trap all of them at the same time, me or Sakura would have had to fight them."

Jiraiya nodded slowly. "Fair enough. Why did he send the rest of the team ahead, then? Why not have you guys take out the ninja while he had them captive?"

"Because we didn't have time," I replied immediately. "We were already behind and slowing down at all could have kept us from catching up."

He nodded again. "Last question. Your mission was to keep Sasuke from getting himself killed chasing after Gaara, just like Gai's mission was to keep Sasuke from getting himself killed chasing after Itachi."

Even I couldn't miss the reprimand in his voice, or the way his eyes pinned Sasuke to the ground with a sharp glare.

"Without reinforcements, what would have happened to Shikamaru?"

I felt a chill run down my spine. I know Shika had said it before he revealed his plan, but...

"He captured them all, right? It wouldn't have mattered, he could have just knocked them all out or even killed them if he had to."

I looked over at Shika, but he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Wrong," Jiraiya said coldly. "He successfully captured eight of his pursuers, but all strike teams have at least one additional member who hangs back to deal with just those kind of situations. Without reinforcements, he would have _died_."

I stared at Shika, who still wasn't looking at me, then turned back to Jiraiya. Jiraiya wasn't looking at me anymore, but instead staring at Sasuke.

"He would have died alone, just one more casualty in the middle of the invasion. He knew that, and made the call to send the rest of the team ahead to chase after an idiotic genin who put his pride ahead of his duty and his common sense because _that was his mission_."

I turned to look at Sasuke, who was pale and wide-eyed as his gaze shifted between Jiraiya and Shikamaru.

"He knowingly and willingly placed the mission and the lives of his team above his own life. He also correctly judged the situation and determined the best option available to him, relying on his team to see things through even when he could not. _That _is why he was promoted."

Jiraiya turned to look at me, a grin on his face. "You've got the skills, kid. No one doubts that, least of all me." His smile faded, leaving a serious expression behind. "_However_, you're always charging ahead. Your first instinct is to fight on your own, without thinking about whether or not you're the best person for the job or whether you are needed more somewhere else. You did it in the Forest, you did it during the invasion, and you did it yesterday.

"You try to protect your team, which is great. Now you need to learn to _rely on them_. Once you can do that, the sky's the limit."

I nodded slowly as I absorbed what he was saying.

"As for _you_," Jiraiya said, turning back to Sasuke. "If I had my way, I'd bust your ass back to the Academy or have you running D-ranks for the rest of your career. Since it's not, I suppose my next option is to try to pull your head out of your ass before it's too late.

"You can come with us, but under one condition: if you pull a stunt like that again, if you let your pride endanger this mission or your teammates, no one is going to try to save you. And if you somehow manage to cause actual damage or death through your idiocy, _I will kill you myself_."

There was no killing intent. There was just the absolute certainty that Jiraiya wasn't making a threat but instead a statement of fact.

"If you have a problem with that, you can head back to the village with Gai and deal with the D-ranks or whatever punishment they decide to give you for being an idiot. Your call."

Sasuke was silent for nearly a minute before he finally nodded. "I understand," he said, his voice sounding a little hoarse, "and I'll go with you."

**Sasuke Uchiha has been recruited! Sasuke Uchiha has joined your party!**

Sasuke looked startled for a moment before he shot me a glare. "Very funny, dobe," he muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets.

I shot Shikamaru a glance. He looked wide awake for the first time since we had left the hotel, and he met my eyes and nodded.

"Yosh! I shall leave the youthful Sasuke-kun in your hands, Jiraiya-sama! I look forward to your successful return!" Lee's sensei shouted, and with that he turned and sped off towards Konoha, already running and rapidly gaining speed.

Ero-sennin watched him leave for a moment, then turned back to us. "Alright, Lazy, Broody, and..." he eyed me for a second, then nodded with a grin, "the other one. Let's get moving."

"The other one?" I yelped. "How come I'm 'the other one'?"

"Because 'Blondie' is too obvious."

"That's bullshit! I am not the other one! The _teme _should be the other one!"

"Nope. He's obviously Broody."

"But- you- _argh!_"

"Is it always like this?" I heard Sasuke ask Shika.

"Pretty much," Shika replied with a yawn.

"Maybe I should have gone back with Gai..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: If you haven't noticed yet, the Manual has been moved to a Google Document. You can find the link on my profile. It is still very much a work in progress, but I hope to fill in some of the other skill trees sometime this week.**

**In an effort to cut down on exposition I'll be assuming from this point forward that the characters have a basic understanding of how the game functions and how the rules work. They don't know everything yet, but in general the only time I'll really be drawing attention to the mechanics are when they are trying to find ways around them or trying to abuse them in some fashion. **

**That said, let me know if there are any areas which are unclear or don't seem to make sense (or just don't make sense period). I'll try to clarify them in the Manual or answer them in-story if I can. One thing I _won't _be doing is detailing out combat mechanics in numbers; tracking DPS, accuracy, etc. down to the decimal would take a lot of time and detract from the story, I feel. The closest I'll get is in the descriptions of some of the abilities. **

**I've gotten a few reviews talking about how the abilities in the game are too similar to the canon ninjutsu. Hopefully Shika's use of the "Kage Haru" and "Kage Mane" abilities and their contrast with the "real" version will clarify my intent with that. The abilities with have the same general goal as their ninjutsu counterparts (in the cases where they have one at all) but _how _they work is quite different and can be quite important as well. For instance, with the Nara tree, Shika isn't frozen in position while using those abilities. On the other hand, the ones he has access to so far act more like a "bind legs" ability than paralysis. **

**On a slightly different note, I'm considering changing all of the "X Trees" into more themed names. The Blood Tree in particular was a lot of fun to come up with, and I think running with themes like that for all of them would be more interesting to read and simpler for me to come up with coherent abilities. For instance, the Blood Tree might become "The Path of Blood" while the Aggression Tree might become "Power Overwhelming." Any suggestions are welcome.**

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**


	8. Life Five: Ninjas Unknown

"Can't we at least _try_?" I asked, definitely not whining as I did so. It had been two days since Sasuke was recruited, but we still hadn't come across any floating words or anything else we could have used as proof for him. Because of that, we still hadn't explained anything to him, which was driving me up the wall.

"That could actually hurt us in the long run if we try now and fail to convince him. It could set him against the idea and cause him to dismiss actual evidence as fabrications to shore up our deception. He might convince himself that we're lying if we can't get through to him the first time, basically," Shika corrected himself when I gave him an odd look. "It's better to wait until we can provide definite proof."

I scowled, shooting Sasuke-teme a glare. Even when he wasn't actually involved in the conversation he was still managing to piss me off.

'**An Introduction To Pain' Unlocked!**

'**Teacher, Teacher' Unlocked!**

'**Cold As Ice' Unlocked!**

'**Shadow of the Demon' Unlocked!**

'**A Useful Tool' Unlocked!**

'**A Freak, A Creep, and the Other One' Unlocked!**

'**Sand Trap' Unlocked!**

"... the hell?" I muttered, looking to Shikamaru for an explanation. We were just walking along the road, there was no way we had unlocked anything. Shika seemed just as confused as me, though that didn't make me feel any better.

"Cut it out, dobe!" Sasuke called out, annoyed.

"Make me, teme!" I shouted back before turning to Shika. "Any ideas?"

"It can't have been us," he said, "which just leaves Hanabi. She must have stumbled onto something." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "It seems that leaving her behind will turn out to be useful after all. She-"

**'Jingle Jangle' Unlocked!**

"Dobe!" Sasuke growled.

I didn't even acknowledge him this time. "What do you think she's doing?"

"Do those phrases mean anything to you?" he asked rather than answering my question. "The only one that jumps out at me is 'Sand Trap'."

I nodded uncomfortably. "Yeah, they do actually. 'Sand Trap' reminds me of that bastard Ichibi, and 'Cold As Ice' and some of the others make me think of Haku and Zabuza."

Shika frowned for a moment, which stretched into a minute, then he let out a sigh and rubbed his hand through his hair. "Troublesome..." he groaned. "I can feel this idea rattling around in my head, but it just won't click."

I shrugged. "We'll just have to wait til we get back, then. Hanabi probably already knows what it is anyway."

Shika sighed and nodded, still looking annoyed but not arguing with me.

* * *

><p>"She's not here either," Sasuke-teme muttered later that night, throwing himself into a chair as we entered our hotel room.<p>

Ero-sennin had shoved all three of us into the same room, even though he got one all to himself. If he wasn't teaching me such awesome jutsu I might have been annoyed about that.

"We're just wasting our time like this. We could be training, or doing actually useful missions," Sasuke continued.

"Hey, we're tracking down the next Hokage!" I shot back. "What could be more useful than that?"

"_Anything_, apparently. We haven't actually found her, have we?" he countered. "All we've done so far is visit six hot springs, eleven bars, and seven casinos."

"Yeah, well…" I started, but couldn't really come up with a response to that.

"Jiraiya is gathering intelligence," Shika pointed out tiredly. I'd noticed he'd stopped calling Ero-sennin "sama" when he wasn't around, although he was still super-polite to his face.

"You mean _research material_," Sasuke scoffed.

Shika let his head roll forward, landing on the table with a soft thud. "That too," he sighed.

"At least he's training us!"

Shika groaned again, wrapping his arms over his head as if taking cover.

"Training _you_, maybe," Sasuke growled, crossing his arms and staring out the window. "He hasn't bothered to show me a single technique, and he refuses to let me learn the Rasengan. He just has me running all over the place and sparring with you and Shikamaru." His fist tightened and his face grew angry. "He won't even let me use my Sharingan!"

"Would you two stop already? Listening to you argue is way too troublesome," Shikamaru muttered as he lifted his head off the desk.

"At least you're lucky enough to be learning something useful," Sasuke muttered grumpily.

Shika suddenly jumped in his seat, his eyes wide. He quickly turned to the pile of papers lying in front of him and eventually pulled out what looked like a map.

"Naruto, get over here."

I wandered over, giving him a curious look as I tried to figure out what had gotten into him. As I got closer, I could see that it was indeed a map, of Fire Country.

"Pick a town."

"Huh? What do you mean, 'pick a town'? For what?"

Sasuke-teme wandered over too, looking curious.

"Call it a hunch," Shika said quickly. "Just pick a town."

"What am I picking a town for?" I pressed, leaning over the map and jabbing at a random name with my finger.

Shikamaru leaned over the map, his eyes sharp as he studied the name I had pointed to. "Jiraiya's method of searching doesn't seem to be working, but since he has me pouring over reports and rumors I might as well do something with that."

"And you think just having the dobe pick one at random will help?"

"You got a better idea?"

Sasuke crossed his arms and grunted, but didn't reply.

Shika picked over the papers on the desk, eventually pulling out a small scroll with a couple of sections circled in red ink.

"Perfect."

Sasuke and I both leaned over, squinting as we worked out what the text said.

"_Roaring Flame Casino in Tanzaku Gai hosting poker tournament on the 17th."_

* * *

><p>"Bullshit."<p>

"Ha! Eat that, teme!" I crowed victoriously.

"This is bullshit," he insisted, shaking his head.

Shikamaru was grinning to himself, his eyes gleaming.

"I see your standards have slipped, pervert," the pretty blonde lady said, crossing her arms under her prominent chest. "Not that you really had any to begin with," she corrected herself, smirking.

Shika had had to do some fast talking, but he'd eventually convinced Ero-sennin to pick Tanzaku Gai as his next destination. We'd made a beeline to the casino and within thirty seconds of entering had spotted what was apparently our goal. I'd thought Tsunade was supposed to be as old as Ero-sennin, though. The lady he was talking to couldn't be more then twenty-five, tops.

"There's no fucking way."

"Would you two _shut up_?" Ero-sennin growled.

"No no, please continue," the blonde insisted, smiling widely. "I'm sure you two will be far more interesting than whatever foolishness the pervert has in mind."

"Tsu-hime..." Ero-sennin whined.

Whatever he would have said after that was lost in the sudden din as people started shouting from behind us. When I turned to look, a bunch of the machines that lined all the walkways near the entrance of the casino were flashing and making lots of noise, and people were pushing and shoving as they tried to get closer to them. Shouting started up from the middle of the casino next, all centered around two people who had been sitting at a large, semi-circular table. They were pointing at each other and the dealer, and as I watched one of them threw a punch at the other. Several other people soon got involved in the fight as well.

A tray of poker chips got tossed into the air as one of the workers tripped on the edge of the carpet. The chips flew in every direction, including a red one that nailed Sasuke-teme in the forehead. I'd barely started to laugh at the expression on his face when I noticed that the chip had landed on its edge on the wooden portion of the floor and was spinning in place.

Then I saw the other chips doing the same thing.

All of them.

The next moment, Shika had me by the arm and was dragging me out of the casino. I saw a bunch of guys with tattoos swarming over the floor, pushing people away from the chips and generally looking menacing before the doors swung open and we were outside again.

"Troublesome, troublesome, troublesome," Shika chanted under his breath, his face looking a little pale.

"... that was weird," I said finally.

He shot me an annoyed look, though he finally stopped repeating himself. "New rule," he said, his tone firm. "You stay out of any and all casinos."

"What? Why?" I cried. I mean, it's not like I was planning on gambling – even if it did look kinda fun – but still! It's not like it was _my _fault all that random crap was happening.

Before he could answer, Ero-sennin and the blonde lady exited the casino, a black-haired lady I'd seen standing near the blonde following them with a pig clutched in her arms, and Sasuke-teme walking next to her.

"Not even five minutes after you show up, the entire casino is shut down and the poker tournament is canceled," the blonde lady growled, one hand clenched in a fist and shaking at her side. Behind them I could see the stream of people leaving the casino continuing, most of them looking unhappy and several struggling against the guys with the tattoos. "If this is your idea of getting my attention..."

"No!" Ero-sennin said frantically, taking a step back. "I had nothing to do with... whatever that was. I just want to talk, though we should do it somewhere with some privacy. Or public," he corrected quickly as the blonde lady took a step forward, her fist rising. "Public works too."

* * *

><p>We followed her to a bar and settled into a booth, me and Shika across from Sasuke and the black-haired lady, Shizune, while Ero-sennin sat across from Tsunade. I was still trying to figure that one out, actually. Nobody else seemed to find it odd that she looked half as old as she was supposed to.<p>

Tsunade had already gone through half a bottle of sake before she said anything else.

"What the hell do you want, Jiraiya?" she growled finally.

"I am here on official business from Konoha," he began, suddenly serious. "The Elders have formally requested that you return to Konoha-"

"I'm not-"

"-as the Fifth Hokage."

Tsunade's jaw dropped for a moment before it snapped shut. She was silent for a few seconds, sloshing the sake in her cup slowly before she tossed it back and drained it in a single gulp. As she poured herself another cup, she said, "So Sensei really is..."

"Yeah," Jiraiya said when she didn't continue. "Orochimaru was responsible."

"What?" I shouted as I leapt to my feet and slammed my hands on the table. "That fucking Snake-Bastard killed Hokage-jiji?" I mean, I'd heard that he'd died, but I hadn't... I hadn't really thought about who...

"Who are these brats, anyway?" Tsunade said suddenly.

"This is Naruto Uzumaki, the sleepy one is Shikamaru Nara, and the grumpy one is Sasuke Uchiha."

Tsunade focused on me for some reason, her eyes narrowed. I shifted uncomfortably, not liking the look in her eye, and only relaxed when she finally turned back to Ero-sennin.

"I refuse," she said firmly, then downed another cup of sake.

Ero-sennin just sighed and I heard Shikamaru choke on his drink, but I was mainly focused on the ringing in my ears.

"You... refuse?" I said slowly. "We come all the way out here to find you, offer to let you become the Fifth Hokage, and you refuse, just like that?"

"Don't worry so much, brat," Ero-sennin said. He wasn't looking at me though, instead his gaze was focused on Tsunade. "She's the only person who could become the Fifth Hokage. She's led Konoha to victory in the past, she has several techniques that no one else has managed to reproduce, she's easily one of the strongest ninja Konoha has, and she's the descendent of the First Hokage. She really is the most appropriate choice.

"Besides, if she doesn't do it, it'll have to be me instead. I've already got my first decree drafted; mandatory hot springs visits for all kunoichi, every day. I also have some revisions to the uniform in mind..."

Tsunade snorted into her drink, shaking her head. "Even if you did offer to _let me_ be the Hokage, I know better than to walk into that death trap."

I shot to my feet, snarling. "What is that supposed to mean?"

She turned to look at me, a bored expression on her face. "Exactly what I said, brat. Every Hokage has died while in office, in combat. Even Sensei didn't escape that fate in the end. It'll be the same for the next Hokage, and the next, and the next. Just one long string of fools marching towards an early grave."

"You take that back!" I shouted. "The Hokages are heroes! They give everything to protect the village and keep everyone safe! That's why it's my dream to become Hokage one day, and I'm not going to just let you get away with saying crap like that!"

Her eyes widened suddenly and I got the weird feeling she wasn't even looking at me anymore. It passed quickly, though, and then she was on her feet and leaning forward, her face right in front of mine.

"Being Hokage," she said slowly, her voice intense, "is _worthless_. Do yourself a favor, kid, and find a better dream."

My fist was moving forward the next moment, then someone grabbed me and jerked me backwards, dumping me in my seat again. Tsunade just stood there, an arrogant sneer on her face as she stared at me with cold eyes.

"Don't be an idiot," Ero-sennin growled.

"Let me go," I growled, trying to launch myself forward again. "I don't care who she is, I'm going to kick her ass for saying that!"

"How cute," she muttered as she crossed her arms under her chest again. "Why don't we take this outside, and I'll show you just how much of an idiot you really are."

* * *

><p>"Troublesome..." Shika sighed. "Is this what it's always like with him?"<p>

"Pretty much," Sasuke grunted.

I decided to ignore the rest of their conversation, focusing on the blonde standing across from me in the middle of the street. She was smirking again, and holding up one finger in front of her.

"One finger," she declared, "is all I'll need to put you in your place."

I snarled as I charged forward, my right hand cocked back as I prepared to deck her even harder than I had Neji. I thought he was an asshole but Tsunade had already managed to surpass him completely. Even the way she was just standing there, that stupid smirk on her face growing even wider was pissing me off. Once I was close enough, I threw my fist forward, ready to wipe that-

She casually caught my fist with one hand, and even though she made the motion look graceful, even gentle, it felt like I'd just punched a stone wall. Then she held her other hand up in front of my face, her thumb holding back her middle finger. Then her finger blurred forward and-

...

"Ow..." I groaned as I picked myself up off the ground, my head throbbing and a high-pitched tone ringing in my ears. Something warm was dripping from my forehead, and a quick swipe with my hand revealed it to be blood.

I heard Sasuke grunt something and Shikamaru whistle lowly.

"Have you learned your lesson yet, brat?" she called out, and even her voice sounded like it was smirking at me.

"I should have known better..." I replied as I stumbled forward.

"Oh? Did something finally make it through into that thick brain of yours?"

"... than to take an old hag like you lightly."

The street was silent for a moment, then Ero-sennin let out a low groan. "Hey, Tsu-hime, leave him alive at least, won't you?"

She seemed to ignore him, instead focusing on me as her smile grew strained. "What was that, brat?"

"Army of One," I muttered under my breath. "I said," I called out in a louder voice, "that I should have known that an _old hag_ like you would have some tricks up her sleeve!"

"You have a death wish or something, dobe?" Sasuke called out.

"Shut up, teme! I'm not going to back down from an old hag like her!"

"Why don't you come and say that to my face, brat," she growled.

"Fine! I will, old hag!" I called out, starting to march towards her.

"Fine, brat!" she snapped back, matching my pace.

We met in the middle, stopping less than a foot away from each other. She had both of her fists clenched and a strained grin on her face as she glared at me. I clenched my jaw as I met her stare, not backing down an inch.

"Something you wanted to say to me, brat?"

"You losing your hearing too, old hag?"

Her hand blurred forward again, finger poised to strike, but I was ready with a punch of my own. I felt a small breeze blow past my head as I moved forward, my fist aimed right at that smug smirk of hers. Her body twisted a bit, though, so I didn't end up hitting her face.

My fist sank into something soft before bouncing back, and Tsunade staggered backwards, a shocked look on her face as her left hand clutched at her chest.

Then someone else joined the fray, and I found myself being shaken back and forth.

"Naruto!" Ero-sennin yelled in my face. "Even if you forget everything I have ever taught you, engrave this lesson into your brain- no, into your very _soul_! A true man will never take any action that could _possibly_ result in damage to such priceless works of art!"

He continued to shake me back and forth as he yelled, enough that I was actually feeling a little dizzy.

"Whaddya mean, Ero-sennin?" I finally managed.

"With your right hand," he proclaimed, "you have _dared_ wound the Left Pillar of Heaven! As your teacher- no, as a _man_, I cannot let you continue on this path! Repent, Naruto! Repent, and-"

"Ji-rai-ya..." I heard a menacing voice growl, and Ero-sennin suddenly froze before slowly turning around, a nervous expression on his face.

"Tsu-hime, I humbly apologize for my student's-"

His speech was interrupted by her fist, and I blinked as he was sent flying down the street, bouncing several times before crashing into a wall and finally coming to a stop.

"What 'Left Pillar of Heaven', you pervert?" she yelled after him.

Suddenly, after seeing Ero-sennin get sent flying like that and staring at Tsunade's form trembling with anger, my plan didn't seem like such a good idea after all. Even knowing she literally couldn't touch me wasn't as reassuring as it had been a moment ago.

Come to think of it, how come Jiraiya could-

Her eyes snapped to mine suddenly, narrowing dangerously. "As for you…" she growled.

"Tsunade-sama," Shika spoke up suddenly as he came to my rescue. "Before you splatter my teammate across the street, I would like to propose something."

At least, I think he was coming to my rescue.

Her gaze lingered on me for a moment, then switched to Shika. "What do you want, Nara?"

"I would like to make a bet with you."

"Uh, Shika, is this really-" I started to ask.

"I'm listening," Tsunade interrupted me.

"As genin, we aren't really involved with the selection of the Hokage or any of that, but we know that you are a very skilled medic. One of our friends was gravely injured during the Chuunin Exams, and without your help he'll probably never be able to be a ninja again."

"Sounds like he's one of the lucky ones to me," she said, crossing her arms.

Sasuke frowned darkly, and even Shika had to suppress a twitch, but he managed to continue smoothly. "He has devoted his entire life to becoming a ninja, Tsunade-sama, and to lose that dream now would be beyond cruel, especially if there was even the slightest chance he could recover."

Tsunade shrugged lightly. "Alright, so I guess my end is that I'll travel to Konoha and heal him for you, but that's _all _I'll be doing. Go in, fix him, get out, period. What are you putting up for your end of the bet?"

Shika smirked. "Sixty thousand ryo."

I choked, and Sasuke's head whipped around to stare at Shika. "What?" he yelped. "We don't-"

"What's the bet?" Tsunade interrupted, grinning eagerly.

"Now wait just a-"

"A poker game, between the four of us. We each start with twenty thousand in chips, and last one standing wins the bet."

"Ha. Nice try, Nara," Tsunade said, shaking her head, "but that gives your side three chances to win to my one. You'll have to do better than that."

Shikamaru nodded easily, as if he had expected that. "In that case, if anyone other than Naruto wins, you win. That way _you_ have three chances to win to our one."

"There's no way in hell that-"

"Better, but I wasn't born yesterday. If you want to play like that, then none of you can fold. At all."

"That's ridi-"

"How about we can only fold after you raise, but not to each other."

"You're on," Tsunade snapped, grinning widely. Then she slowly leaned forward, her right hand in a fist as she slowly cracked her knuckles. "And if you try to weasel your way out of this," she continued threateningly, "I'll be selling off your organs until the bet is covered."

She whirled, striding towards her black-haired companion and laughing to herself. "Game starts in one hour, brats. Be there or forfeit."

**Checkpoint "Know When To Fold 'Em" Reached.**

I slowly turned to look at Shika, who was smiling to himself and looking quite pleased. Sasuke, on the other hand...

"If we lose this, I will _murder you_," he growled. "And cut it out already, Dobe!" he snarled at me before he turned on his heel and followed Tsunade, muttering under his breath the whole way.

"We don't have sixty thousand ryo, Shika," I pointed out. "I don't have _one _thousand."

"Neither do I," he replied easily, "but it doesn't matter."

"It doesn't? I'm pretty sure Tsunade would be able to track us down, especially if she comes back as Hokage," I pointed out. "Hell, if she knew we didn't have the money she might just kill us-"

Dying. Checkpoints.

"Oh. Oh!" I said, grinning widely. "It doesn't matter!"

"Nope," Shika said smugly. "I think I might get the hang of this yet," he added as he began strolling down the street.

* * *

><p>"If I see any red in those eyes, I'll be removing them from your head, Uchiha," Tsunade declared as we settled down at the table. She had arranged for a table to be set up in her room at her hotel, though she had <em>kindly <em>ordered room service under my name. She currently had a large bottle of sake set up next to her seat, and had arranged for each of us to have one of our own as well. Shika set his aside, and I decided to follow his lead; I didn't like the smell of the stuff, anyway.

Sasuke just grunted, still glaring sourly at anything and everything. I was actually feeling quite relaxed myself – with Shika's reminder about checkpoints, especially since we just got another, I was even looking forward to this.

"So, how do you play poker, anyway?" I asked.

Tsunade almost choked on her drink before she started cackling to herself, the sound echoing throughout the room. Shizune, still holding that pig, just shook her head and looked at me sympathetically. Sasuke's face was turning suspiciously red, and he was glaring at me angrily for some reason.

"What? I've never played before."

Tsunade was humming some tune under her breath as she shuffled the cards. "It's easy, brat," she said, smiling widely. "If you think your hand is good, you put money in the pot. If you don't, then you don't. The rest is just details."

Shika proceeded to fill in those "details" as we played. I felt my head swimming as I tried to keep track of straights and flushes and full houses and everything else. It took a few rounds – er, hands – before I got the hang of it, but eventually I felt confident as I raised or checked.

Shika tried to start a conversation with Tsunade a few times, but she remained focused on the game and gave very short replies, if she bothered answering at all.

It took a while, but I noticed the pile of chips in front of me growing steadily larger as the other three piles dwindled. I also noticed that Shika and Sasuke were making very small bets, rarely raising and folding almost every chance they got. Most of the hands came down to me and Tsunade, and she kept pushing larger and larger stacks of chips forward.

The turning point came when she had just won a large hand and had just about as many chips as I did. She studied her hand for a moment before grinning and pushing forward her stack. "All in," she said with a feral grin.

"Fold," Sasuke said immediately, still looking pissed. Shika quickly echoed him.

I stared down at my cards, not answering immediately. I hadn't seen this kind of hand all night, but I was pretty sure Shika had mentioned it as being good.

"Come now, surely you've got more guts than the Uchiha," Tsunade mocked. "Or are you going to just keep backing down from-"

"All in!" I snapped, shoving my pile of chips forward.

"That's more like it, brat!" she said, laughing. "Now read 'em and weep! Full house, Aces over Nines!"

Sasuke's head hit the table as he let out a small growl, but Shika just looked at me, waiting.

I started laying my cards down on the table, actually enjoying myself a bit. "If I remember right," I said, "that beats a flush." I laid down my fourth card, noting Shika's growing grin. "But what about a straight flush?" I asked as I laid down my last card.

Tsunade abruptly stopped laughing.

**Achievement Unlocked: The Legendary Sucker (0)**

Sasuke started coughing, turning his head and struggling to hide his grin. I guess the _teme_ has a sense of humor after all.

* * *

><p>"Why does Tsunade-sama dislike Konoha so much?" I heard Shika ask Shizune, the black-haired lady who was apparently Tsunade's apprentice... or niece, I wasn't clear which, really. Tsunade was sitting on the far side of the room, working her way through her third bottle of sake as she stared sourly at the wall. The rest of us were giving her some space to calm down and come to terms with the fact that she had lost the bet.<p>

"She's lost a lot of people to Konoha," Shizune said quietly. "Her grandfather and great-uncle were both Hokage and died in the line of duty, and she also lost her fiance and her younger brother as well. Nawaki especially – that was her younger brother – hit her hard. He died in battle the day after his birthday, the day after she gave him the necklace she's wearing around her neck. She's convinced that the necklace is cursed, and that it was partly her fault, no matter how ridiculous that is. After that, she just didn't see any reason to stay in-"

"So she just gave up?" Sasuke snapped, glaring at Shizune. He soon switched to glaring at Tsunade, however, and she blinked at him blearily in response.

"Whuh?"

"You lost a couple of people and decided to just abandon the village? Ran away from Konoha, from being a ninja, from everything?" He was breathing somewhat heavily and his face was flushed.

"Uh, Sasuke," I said slowly, wondering just what had set him off.

"_This _is the person we went through all this trouble to ask to be our Hokage? Someone who just runs away from all their problems and spends all their time drinking and gambling? Don't think I missed the fact that Jiraiya was looking at casinos and bars when he was trying to find you."

"Now see here," Tsunade growled, climbing to her feet and suddenly seeming a lot less drunk than she had just seconds ago. "What does a brat like you know about-" she abruptly cut herself off, a grimace crossing her face.

"What do _I _know about loss?" Sasuke growled lowly, his entire body shaking. "Was _your _entire family killed in a single night? Did _you _come home to find your parents lying on the floor, covered in blood? Did _you _find a single relative still alive, only to find out that _he _was the one who was responsible?"

Tsunade remained silent, her gaze averted.

"I didn't think so," Sasuke spat. "This whole time you've been treating us like we weren't worthy of your time, like we should be _thankful _you bothered to speak with us at all, when really you're just a coward who abandoned her village and her duties as soon as something went wrong."

He turned on his heel and stalked to the door, wrenching it open with a mighty heave. He paused, turning his head to glare at Tsunade one last time. "I guess you were right about one thing; if someone like _you _is going to be our Hokage, the title really is worthless."

With that, he walked out, slamming the door behind him.

I stared at the door, stunned. I'd _never _heard Sasuke talk like that; that was even more intense than the brief run-in he'd had with Itachi. I turned to look at Shika, who looked just as shocked as I did.

"Get out."

I turned to look at Tsunade.

"Um, sorry about Sasuke, he just, uh..."

"_Get_. _Out_," she growled, turning to glare at me.

I nodded dumbly, the words I had been going to say dying in my throat, and followed Shika as he quickly walked out of the hotel room, closing the door quietly behind me.

"C'mon," he said lowly. "We need to find Sasuke."

As we walked down the hall, I heard the sound of shattering glass coming from the room we had just left.

* * *

><p>It took us a solid thirty minutes to track down Sasuke, but we eventually found him sitting on a roof on the far side of the city, staring at the sky.<p>

"Hey," I said as I landed on the roof nearby, Shika half a step behind me.

Sasuke just grunted. I settled down a few feet away, eventually turning my gaze skyward as I failed to come up with anything to say. What _could _I say, really?

"She didn't mean anything by that," Shika tried after a few minutes of awkward silence. "The closest thing she has left to family is Shizune, and it could be that she's just trying to protect her as best she can."

"Must be nice," Sasuke said snidely. "The only way I have left to protect _my_ family is to kill the bit of it I have left."

Shika didn't say anything after that, and another few minutes passed in silence before Sasuke finally spoke up.

"I _have_ to kill him, you know? He killed my parents, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, my friends, even the people I barely knew. He killed _everyone_... everyone but me. I'm the only one left to do it. If I run away, it's like... like they're dying all over again, only this time _I'm _the one doing it.

"I have to, but... you _saw _him. He was just standing there, facing off against Jiraiya-sama, and he didn't bat an eye. I gave it my best shot and he swept it aside like it was _nothing_. How am I supposed to..." his voice trailed off, and I felt my chest clench tightly at how lost and hopeless he sounded.

"I'll help you," I said, the words spilling out before I knew what I was saying. I meant them, though, and met Sasuke's eyes calmly as his head whipped around to stare at me. "I mean, the bastard's after me anyway, right? And if anyone needs a good killing, it's him. Besides, you're my teammate! There's no way I'm just going to let you run off on your own to fight somebody like that."

"Troublesome..." Shika sighed. "You're a Konoha ninja," he added, "and we don't leave our own out to hang."

Sasuke blinked rapidly for a moment before he turned to stare at the sky again. "Yeah," he said thickly after a few moments.

"... Thanks."

* * *

><p>"Well this is awkward," I muttered as we left Tanzaku Gai.<p>

Ero-sennin had gotten us all up early the next morning, looking equally annoyed and pleased with us. I'd thought he was going to rip into Sasuke for pissing off Tsunade, but he hadn't said a word about it. All he'd done is hand Sasuke a scroll that apparently contained a ninjutsu, given the way Sasuke kept practicing hand-seals and referring back to it as we walked.

He wasn't the problem, though.

No, the problem was Tsunade. She had met us the next morning, dark bags under bloodshot eyes, and loudly insisted that we "Get this over with." She hadn't said a word after that, instead alternating between glaring at Jiraiya, glaring at Sasuke, and glaring at nothing. Shizune looked like she was almost as bad off, and she had taken to walking next to me and Shika rather than remain near Tsunade and her foul mood.

"Troublesome," Shika muttered. "This isn't how I imagined this mission going at all."

"Sorry," Shizune said apologetically. "Tsunade-sama is usually much more pleasant than this. It's just that what your friend said last night..."

"Sorry about that," I started to say, but Shizune was already shaking her head.

"It's alright," she replied. "Tsunade-sama shouldn't have said what she did, although I do wish that he'd been a little nicer about it."

"_Some_ people," Tsunade said suddenly, apparently talking to thin air, "have already done their duty to their village."

I tensed, glancing at Sasuke to see his reaction.

"_Some _people," Sasuke said quietly, still practicing his hand-seals, "have to get stronger to survive."

"_Some _people should let other people protect them."

"_Some _people refuse to let more people die for them."

Tsunade frowned, and didn't answer.

She stopped glaring after that, and the tension slowly eased out of the air. The journey became much more pleasant, and Tsunade and Ero-sennin even began to snipe playfully back and forth, telling stories about incidents that had involved the other. I quickly noticed that Ero-sennin's stories tended to involve Tsunade losing clothing at some point, and _all _of Tsunade's stories included her punching Ero-sennin for being a pervert.

Somehow I found her stories entirely believable.

* * *

><p>"Get it straight, pervert," Tsunade reiterated a few days later as we neared Konoha. "I'm only back to heal this Lee kid, that's it. Once I'm done, I'm gone."<p>

"Whatever you say, Tsu-hime," Ero-sennin said agreeably. The gate guards stared at the group, their eyes jumping back and forth between Ero-sennin and Tsunade and their faces filled with awe.

As soon we passed through the gates, another one of those event summary things happened, though it was a little different this time.

**Mission "Jiraiya's Search" complete. XP: 5000; Bonus XP: 2000**

**Achievement Unlocked: Is There A Doctor In The House? (20)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Mostly 'Armless (50)**

**Level Up! You Have Reached Level 10!  
><strong>

"Dobe," Sasuke groaned, "give it up already. They just aren't funny." His lips twitched. "Well, most of them," he corrected.

I smirked, turning to Shika who was nodding slowly. _Finally _we could tell Sasuke about what was going on. Even if he did piss me off sometimes, I had to admit it would be good to have him on my side.

We'd barely gotten halfway to the tower before I noticed someone racing towards me. I caught a glimpse of a headband and long black hair and had enough presence of mind to dodge the kick aimed at my ankle.

So she kicked Shika instead.

And then kicked me while I was busy laughing.

"Dammit, Chi- Hanabi!" I growled. "Would you stop that already?"

"Do you have _any idea,_" she hissed, her active Byakugan enhancing her glare, "what the hell is in that Forest? It's insane!"

She blinked suddenly, then her mouth dropped open as she pointed at me.

"Wha- wha- that's not possible!" she gasped.

I heard Tsunade chuckling and looked over to see her smirking at us. "Gotta admit, Konoha is a lot more amusing than I remembered," she said.

* * *

><p><strong>-Interlude – Hanabi-<strong>

**-A Few Days Before-**

"Hanabi, you know you aren't supposed to activate your Byakugan during class," Umino-sensei chided.

Hanabi frowned and reluctantly deactivated her bloodline, pondering what she had seen.

"Did you know you have the largest reserves of any teacher in the Academy, Umino-sensei?" she asked.

She had first noticed something different about her Byakugan during her morning practice session with Father, though she knew better than to bring something like that up to him without first investigating it for herself. Especially since Father had been in an unusually good mood – he had actually complimented her, and even _sounded _pleased – and she didn't want to ruin it with the suggestion that something might be wrong with her Byakugan.

Seeking independent confirmation would have to do.

Her teacher blinked, looking at her oddly. He opened his mouth to say something when one of the idiots in the second row suddenly started laughing out loud.

"Largest 'reserves'! Way to go, sensei!"

The laughter started to spread through the room and soon most of the boys were falling out of their seats or calling out congratulations while the girls were evenly split between looking mortified and confused. The only two boys who weren't laughing were that idiot Sarutobi and his friend, U-something, though his tagalong Moegi was looking suspiciously red. Sarutobi had been mercifully quiet all day; Umino-sensei hadn't had to shout him down or discipline him even once.

"QUIET!" Umino-sensei thundered, activating his signature genjutsu that amplified his voice and caused his head to appear unnaturally large and menacing.

"I do have B-rank _chakra _reserves, as do several other teachers in the Academy. However, that has no bearing on the lesson, so _focus_. This lesson could very well save you life in the field someday." For some reason his face was a little flushed, too.

Hanabi rolled her eyes at that. Umino-sensei said that at least once a day, though she would admit that identifying venomous snakes was likely to be more life-saving than, say, the official, approved method for storing kunai in a pouch (point down, rings parallel to the body).

She suffered through the Academy for several more hours, briefly activating her Byakugan between classes and making note of what she saw. Despite her initial thoughts, the numbers that hovered around each individual - student and teacher alike, and even civilians - never changed throughout the day, neither rising nor falling.

It was the way the numbers broke down that first clued her in to what she was seeing. The numbers for the teachers were considerably higher than the students, and most of the civilians were in the double digits at best. Umino-sensei rated a "1432," beating out Miyama-sensei's "1219" handily. Of course, both paled in comparison to Father's "2886."

She herself was something of an anomaly, it seemed. Her "745" placed her on the low end of the scale for the teachers, but was four times higher than any other student. She had known she was better, of course, but the difference was surprisingly large.

Perhaps instead of current reserves it was maximum reserves? She would have to ask Shikamaru and Nar-

She growled, cutting off her own train of thought. She didn't need any help from them. Just because they got to work with one of the most powerful ninja in the village and were on quite possibly the most important mission currently happening didn't mean anything. She could figure this out on her own just fine.

And when they got back, she'd shove her success in their faces. She might even explain what she knew, if they asked nice- no, if they _begged_. Yes, that would suffice.

She only half paid attention as she followed the rest of the class outside for their afternoon exercises, her eyes narrowed in a glare as she contemplated what she would put those two through. They dragged her into this... this... _thing _with no warning, then disappeared right after - not even a _day! _She could feel her teeth grinding as she heard Naruto's parting words echo in her head.

"_Tell you all about it!" _Because you won't be going with us. Because we don't need you. Because you're just a useless Academy student.

"Hanabi!" Umino-sensei snapped, sounding annoyed. "I've called your name twice already!"

She startled, looking up to see one of the other girls in her class, Ayane, already waiting inside the rough circle that served as the unofficial sparring ring for the students.

"My apologies, Umino-sensei," she said, bowing slightly before she began making her way into the ring.

She heard one of the boys around the edge of the ring mutter something about "reserves" and heard the laughter starting. She whipped her head around, her eyes focused in a harsh glare as she focused on the one that had spoken. His laughter cut off abruptly as he choked slightly, his face going white. He actually stumbled back two steps before falling, landing awkwardly on his back and elbows. Despite his position, his eyes never left hers and she could see the fear in his face. The others around him seemed to be similarly effected, though to a lesser extent.

"Hanabi!" Umino-sensei called again. She turned to look at him curiously and saw him staring at her with visible surprise. He seemed to struggle with himself for a moment before he finally motioned her towards the sparring ring again, his pen rapidly marking notes on his pad. "Please enter the ring."

"Of course, sensei," she replied. She stepped into the circle and settled into a stance across from Ayane. She had sparred with the girl several times before and knew that she had considerable talent in taijutsu - for a non-Hyuuga. She had never lost, but Ayane had surprised her on occasion and could usually hold her own for at least a minute. In fact, that girl was currently ranked second among the girls, and fifth overall in taijutsu.

She, of course, was first on both counts – as it should be.

Umino-sensei continued writing for a few seconds before he raised one hand and called out, "Begin!"

Hanabi darted forward, her eyes narrowing in irritation when she saw that Ayane was slow to react and was trying to act like she was taken off-guard. The girl had tried that once before, but Hanabi had no intention of allowing such a ploy to work any better than it had the first time. She landed several quick jabs on her stomach and torso, watching for the inevitable shift where Ayane stopped pretending and would try to lash out in a "sudden" reversal of skill.

It took her several seconds of staring at the girl curled up in a ball on the ground, wheezing piteously and coughing up small splashes of blood, before she realized that the reversal wasn't coming.

* * *

><p>"Punctured lung ... weeks to recover ... threatening to pull her out of ... -ing intent ... what kind of training have you ... heiress or not, she's only …"<p>

Hanabi let the conversation in the next room wash over her, only picking out bits and pieces as she stared down at her hands. She'd fought Ayane before, hit her even harder than that, pushed all of her skill and speed into defeating the surprisingly tenacious girl, and _never _had something like that happened. She could still feel the impact as her fists slammed into Ayane's chest, the sudden give that she now understood to be her opponent's ribs shattering under the force of her blows.

She could still feel the sickening knowledge that she'd almost killed the closest thing she had to a friend in her class without even trying.

She could hear her father's even tones saying something, his voice pitched too low for her to make out the words, then the door opened and he walked out. A quick glance inside the room revealed Umino-sensei standing behind his desk, his fists clenched and his face a dull red.

"Hanabi," Father said, glancing down at her. "Come."

She followed behind Father in silence, her gaze focused straight ahead as she studiously avoided acknowledging the stares and whispers that surrounded her as she walked out of the Academy. Several minutes passed like that, the whispers fading away behind her and the stares shifting from shocked or scared to the more comfortable curious and envious as the focus shifted from her to Father. He bore the looks stoically, acknowledging some with a nod of his head and brushing aside others as inconsequential.

"Who is this Ayane?" Father asked, his tone bland as he inclined his head to a man Hanabi had been introduced to before, the head of a successful merchant family that specialized in spices.

"She's civilian-born, but shows great promise. She is especially skilled in taijutsu, and is ranked fifth in our year."

"Has she offended you in some manner?"

Hanabi stopped walking entirely as her gaze snapped to Father's face. "No!" she blurted out, shocked at the question.

All conversation in the street stopped for a moment as she became the center of attention once again, but a quick, sweeping glare from Father sent the onlookers' gazes away again.

Hanabi was already bowing as Father's gaze settled on her. "My apologies, Father. I should not have responded in such a manner."

He nodded after a moment, turning to resume his steady, elegant pace towards the Hyuuga compound. She walked quickly to catch up with him, making sure not to forget her bearing - head held high, back straight, eyes calm and observant.

They walked for nearly a minute in silence before Father spoke again. "Why did you seek to injure her in such a manner, then?"

Hanabi almost stopped walking again, but she had half-expected this question and managed to respond in an even tone. "I had no intent to truly harm her, Father. It was a spar, nothing more, and I struck just as I have countless times before."

Father said nothing further, and she followed in silence as they entered the compound and he led her, not to his office as she had expected, but to the dojo.

He walked to the center of the floor and turned to face her, crouching far lower than the Jyuuken called for, both hands held vertically in front of his body with palms facing her. "Attack me as you did her."

Hanabi could feel the bile rising in her throat as the sound of her friend slowly drowning in her own blood echoed in her ears, but swallowed quickly and managed to walk forward to stand in front of Father. She took a deep breath and settled into her stance.

Father frowned slightly as he watched her, then said, "Begin."

She darted forward, her hands imitating the same sequence of strikes that she had- she had almost-

She found herself on her hands and knees, retching as tears streamed down her face. The next few minutes passed in a haze, just the vague impression of strong arms carrying her somewhere, a damp cloth wiping her face, and warm sheets wrapping around her shivering body.

* * *

><p>She awoke sometime later to a dark room, gentle humming, and a hand gently caressing her brow. It evoked memories she'd forgotten she even had, and one of her hands snaked out and grabbed a handful of soft robes almost on reflex.<p>

"Oh," a quiet voice said as the humming stopped. "I- I'm sorry, Hanabi-chan. I didn't mean to wake you. I'll just go..."

Her grip tightened further, pulling the figure closer as she sat up in bed. "Nee-chan," she whispered, tears starting to pour. She lunged forward, arms wrapping around her sister tightly as she started to sob loudly. Hinata stiffened for a moment, then a hand started stroking Hanabi's hair gently and the humming resumed.

* * *

><p>Hanabi settled into her seat at the breakfast table the next morning, taking her usual position at her father's right hand. Her sister was already seated and half-way into her meal.<p>

"Hanabi," Father said abruptly as he carefully placed his chopsticks onto the tray before him. "You will be accompanying me to the Hokage's Tower today. You will wear a formal robe over your training clothes."

"Yes, Father," she said, the response almost a reflex. It took a moment for the meaning of his words to get through to her. When they did, her eyes widened and she felt her heart beginning to beat rapidly. "Father, am I in tr-"

"I have arranged for a formal evaluation of your skills, as it has become clear that the Academy is no longer sufficient for your training. When you pass the evaluation, you will be entered into the general forces as a genin and assigned to a team in need of a third member."

Hanabi found herself unable to speak. She had several things she wanted to say, questions she wanted to ask, but she couldn't force any of them past her throat. Her hands clutched at her robe, shaking slightly.

"F-Father," Hinata said slowly, and Hanabi looked up to see her sister glancing at her with a concerned expression. "Do you r-really think that Hanabi-chan s-should do such a t-thing today? She-"

"She has clearly been held back by the caliber of opponents she has been facing to this point," Father interrupted, his voice stern. "Once Neji began active duty and devoted himself to missions and training with his team, Hanabi has only been able to spar against inferior opponents."

Hanabi watched as her sister seemed to fold into herself as Father continued to speak, her gaze dropping to her lap and her shoulders hunching. It wasn't difficult to understand why; after all, for the last two years her sister had been her primary opponent. Father did not count himself as an opponent, nor did she – his skill was still far beyond hers. He did not spar, he instructed.

"It is no coincidence that she has shown rapid improvement after witnessing the Chuunin Exams and the fighting during the invasion. With such an example, she-"

"That's not why," Hanabi heard someone say, and it was only when Father's gaze settled on her that she realized she herself had spoken those words. And worse, interrupted Father in doing so.

"Explain."

"It wasn't the Chuunin Exams. I..." Hanabi trailed off, trying to figure out how to explain what had happened when she snuck into Naruto's apartment and the surreal events she had witnessed thereafter. There was no doubt in her mind _that _was the reason for the shift in her power. Perhaps a partial explanation would do. "It was Naruto Uzumaki. When I saw him during the exams, I realized that there were truly strong ninja out there, and that contenting myself with my current level of skill would not suffice."

The reactions to her statement were... odd. Hinata's face had turned red, and she had a small smile on her face as she fidgeted in her seat, one that Hanabi had never seen before. Father's face also had a red tinge, but there was no hint of a smile in his expression.

"Your attempt at humor is misplaced," Father said, a distinct chill in his words.

"Would you have me lie to you, Father?" Hanabi said, drawing herself up in her seat. She firmly reminded herself that she _wasn't _lying to him... not exactly, anyway.

"Uzumaki is not a fitting role model for any ninja, much less a Hyuuga. His skills are unpolished, his manner crass, his discretion lacking, and his mind fit only for crude pranks."

"He beat Neji-nii-san," Hinata spoke up suddenly, her voice unexpectedly firm. She faltered slightly when Father's gaze settled on her again, but she managed to meet his eyes without backing down.

"That he is wise enough to leverage his advantage is his saving grace as a ninja," Father said, "and even then I doubt his plan was truly his own. His improvement, such as it is, only began after Hatake became his teacher."

Hanabi's eyes narrowed thoughtfully. Advantage – singular, and therefore specific. Father knew something about Naruto, something that despite his apparently low opinion of the genin meant he was not surprised that Naruto had managed to win against the strongest ninja the Hyuuga clan had produced since Father's generation.

It brought to mind how Naruto had spoken unusually slowly during his explanation at certain points, picking his words with a care that was completely absent at other times. There was something Naruto didn't want to bring up, something completely separate from this... _thing _they were now caught up in, something Father already knew about.

"Then why was he handpicked to accompany Jiraiya-sama on his mission to locate the next Hokage?" Hanabi pressed.

Hinata let out a small gasp, her eyes wide with surprise. Father turned back to her, his eyes narrowed. "And how would you be privy to such information? Even if that were true, Jiraiya-sama rarely announces his movements and a mission of such import would be kept secret as a matter of course."

"Naruto told me himself," Hanabi countered, though she quickly realized she probably wasn't helping Naruto's case as far as "discretion" went.

Father didn't respond immediately, his eyes studying her thoughtfully. "Regardless, that matter has no bearing on my decision," he said, forcefully returning the conversation to the original topic. "Hanabi, you will eat breakfast and prepare yourself for the evaluation in two hours. Hinata, I believe you are due to meet with your team soon," he said, the dismissal in his voice clear.

With that, he stood and walked from the room.

Hanabi let out a slow breath as the tension in the dining room slowly eased. She turned back to her sister, who was once again fidgeting in her seat with a smile on her face.

"Nee-chan," Hanabi asked, "you were in the same class as Naruto, weren't you?"

Hinata squeaked quietly, her face flushing and her eyes darting around quickly. After a moment, she drew in a deep breath and nodded. "Y-yes, I was. Why?"

"What do you know about him?"

* * *

><p>Hanabi trailed after Father, her mind focused on the conversation she had just had with Hinata. She'd never seen her sister so animated, so expressive, so... happy. She had learned more about Naruto than she had ever expected, and she had to admit she was seeing the blonde-haired idiot in a new light... a bit.<p>

According to Hinata, Naruto had a drive that made him try harder and continue longer at anything he did, and far more often than not he wound up succeeding in the end. Not only that, but he had a way of looking at the world that was infectious, an inner fire that rendered every obstacle surmountable and every setback temporary. And his smile, she claimed, made the sun shine brighter.

Hanabi rather doubted that last one, but hadn't managed to find time to get a word in edgewise in the torrent of praise her sister had unleashed. Hinata had eventually wandered off to join her team, practically floating out the door with a smile on her face, leaving Hanabi to reflect on what she had learned.

Despite whatever craziness Hinata had been infected with, she did have a point. Naruto had _died _four times, suffering through the insanity of this... _thing _completely on his own, and he still seemed upbeat and eager. Also rather annoying at times, she had privately thought, but hadn't mentioned to her sister. At least he'd stopped calling her 'Chibi.'

She was pulled out of her musings as she followed Father into the Hokage Tower. They walked past the Mission Room, and she briefly flashed her Byakugan to confirm that she still could not see the 'floating words' that Naruto had spoken of. Their destination was on the far side of the building, a small room with two tables and a chuunin seated at one of them.

"Welcome, Hyuuga-san," the chuunin said, smiling politely. "If you still wish to continue with the evaluation, we are ready to begin."

"Proceed," Father said, motioning her forward. Hanabi walked forward obediently, scanning the room curiously to determine what she would be asked to do.

"We will start with a written exam. You have thirty minutes to answer as many questions as possible."

* * *

><p>"Congratulations, Hyuuga-genin," the chuunin said a few hours later as he handed her a headband. "You passed your evaluation with high marks and are now considered to be a full member of Konoha's ninja force. You will be contacted soon regarding your team assignment and mission status."<p>

Hanabi bowed as she accepted the headband.

It took a little more time before she was actually able to leave the tower; there were forms to sign, oaths to make, and a picture to be taken. Eventually, however, she was finally able to depart and followed Father out of the tower.

"I am very proud of you, Hanabi," he said as they walked back towards their home.

"Thank you, Father," she replied, smiling at the praise. It was very rare that he spoke so openly.

"Not even Neji was able to pass the Academy so quickly, and from what I hear of your evaluation you did far more than the bare minimum necessary to achieve the rank of genin. You will spar with Neji the next time he is available, so that we can more accurately judge your true skill level."

"Yes, Father," she said more slowly. "What about my spars with Hinata-nee-san?"

"Your spars with Hinata will cease immediately. I will not risk stunting your growth even further by pitting you against opponents so far beneath your skill."

Hanabi felt a small pang at that. She had actually been looking forward to spending more time with her sister, even if it was during a spar.

"Nee-san isn't that bad, Father," she tried. "She's a genin just like I am."

"My decision is final."

"... Yes, Father."

Even as she spoke the words, her mind was already considering other options, including a certain blonde-haired genin currently out on a mission.

* * *

><p>Hanabi walked along the small path that lined Konoha's training grounds, reflecting bitterly that the rumors in the Academy of the enormous mazes of traps and amazing training equipment had been heavily exaggerated, if not outright lies. The training equipment she had seen consisted of logs stuck in the ground, and the traps were few and far between.<p>

While Naruto and Shikamaru – and Sasuke Uchiha now, apparently – were out completing "events" and unlocking "Achievements" – whatever that meant – she was stuck here, no longer in the Academy but still not assigned to a genin team. She couldn't even train with Hinata-nee-chan, since she was busy with her own genin team. They hadn't even let her visit Ayane in the hospital to apologize, since she was still recovering and not eligible for visitors.

She had almost completed her circuit, growing more annoyed as each training ground was revealed to be little more than another piece of the forest that had been fenced off – and even the fence was more like a rope strung between trees than an actual barrier.

Then she came across Training Ground Forty-Four, and quickly decided that _this _was the source of the rumors. The fence was a tightly woven mesh barrier that towered easily twenty feet off the ground, and beyond the fence she could see massive trees and even a few wild animals, including a large tiger lazing about high in the branches within the forest.

There was also a small cleared area just inside one of the gates, and someone had put up a sign that proclaimed that it was the "Forest of Death: Legendary Challenges." There was also some sort of list: Records, Challenges, and New Opponents, it said.

There was something odd about those signs, though. As she examined it with her Byakugan, she would almost swear that they were hanging in mid-

Her eyes widened, and she started racing towards the gate that lead to that area of the forest. As she closed in, she noted that there was someone nearby, though they had the same strange angular chakra network that the fake Iruka did.

"Fufufu," the fake person laughed, rubbing her hands together as she arrived. "Another victim come to play, eh?"

"What is this place?" Hanabi asked, deactivating her Byakugan to get a different view of the area. The words were still there, and they were definitely floating in the middle of the air, but now she could actually see what the fake person was supposed to look like.

The fake person had dark purple hair tied up in a sort of ponytail that spiked upward behind her head. She wore a trenchcoat over a mesh shirt and a short skirt. She tucked her hands into the pockets of her coat as she sauntered towards Hanabi.

"This," the fake said, "is my little slice of heaven. All sorts of idiotic ninja come here to try their luck against the Forest, and I get to watch all of it. Some of them even make it back out."

Hanabi huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm not going to be intimidated by words," she retorted, annoyed. "This is just another part of the training ground, and it looks like it's the only part that's actually interesting."

"Fufufu," the fake chuckled. "I like your style, brat." She pulled a scroll out of her pocket, her eyes flicking over it before widening slightly. "Oh? Looks like you rate a 165.. not too shabby for a genin. With that, I think I can allow you access to a few of the more interesting areas."

Hanabi's brow furrowed, wondering what the fake was talking about. She wasn't aware of any ratings at all, and certainly not one that was that specific number.

'**An Introduction To Pain' Unlocked!**

'**Teacher, Teacher' Unlocked!**

'**Cold As Ice' Unlocked!**

'**Shadow of the Demon' Unlocked!**

'**A Useful Tool' Unlocked!**

'**A Freak, A Creep, and the Other One' Unlocked!**

'**Sand Trap' Unlocked!**

Hanabi made sure not to mention any of the names out loud – she'd seen Naruto do that unthinkingly often enough to know to avoid it.

"What are those for?"

"Those are the ones I'll let you into for now. If you want something else, you'll have to impress me more. Or…" the fake trailed off teasingly. "Or you could look into some of the new opponents we've arranged. You can trade in some of your current rating for access to those."

"And what would those be?" Hanabi asked, feeling curious despite herself.

"Well, we've only got a few right now, but we'll have more coming all the time."

'**A Bolt of Lightning' – 100**

'**A Single Scale' – 100**

'**Do Not Let Me Die' – 100**

'**Jingle Jangle' – 100**

**'Manslayer' – 100**

**'Mithril's Specialist' – 100**

**'Old Time Religion' – 100**

**'The Bird of Hermes' – 100**

'**The Gaze of Time' – 100**

**'Trick Shot' – 100**

'**Zero-Two' – 100**

Hanabi thought over the names in her head. Some sounded vaguely threatening, or at least descriptive, but one… "Jingle Jangle?" she asked.

"Are you _sure_?" the fake asked, a wide grin on her face and a glint in her eyes.

Hanabi wondered if this was a good idea, but it _was _in the training ground. Surely they wouldn't let anything too dangerous into this area. Besides, if it was really above her skill, then she wouldn't be allowed in.

"Yes," she said, with significantly more confidence than she felt.

'**Jingle Jangle' Unlocked!**

Hanabi waited, but nothing else seemed to happen. "So what now?"

"Now," the fake said, licking her lips and shivering lightly, "you have to actually begin the challenge."

"Fine," Hanabi growled, starting to understand some of Naruto's annoyance with how this whole thing operated. It was obvious what she was trying to do, so why didn't it just do it? "Challenges, Jingle Jangle."

**An Introduction to Pain – Suggested Level – None**

**Teacher, Teacher – Suggested Level – 5**

**Cold As Ice – Sug-**

* * *

><p>Hanabi stumbled as the list of the various challenges and their "suggested levels" was cut off abruptly and the scene around her shifted. It suddenly felt like someone had piled weights on top of her, and her knees nearly buckled before she forced them to straighten. She was panting in rapid gasps, and even then it felt like she couldn't quite catch her breath. Her eyes darted around as she took in the seemingly endless desert she found herself in; there wasn't a single sign of life or vegetation anywhere.<p>

She activated her Byakugan to see if that would reveal anything, and froze as she caught sight of the personstanding behind her. Unlike the fakes she had seen before, this one looked completely normal, as if she was seeing him with her normal sight. He towered over her, easily seven feet in height, and his spiked hair added another foot to that total. He had an eyepatch covering his right eye and wore a tattered white coat over a simple black kimono, the sleeves of his coat had been torn off at some point, leaving jagged strips hanging from his shoulders. His angular face had several long, jagged scars, though the rest of his heavily muscled body was even more scarred than his face.

He held a long, rusty blade in his hand, the edge chipped and dulled along the entire length, bouncing if off of his shoulder in a slow rhythm. On his other shoulder was perched a small girl with bright pink hair wearing similar clothing – though without the white coat and in much better repair.

Then his head moved, and her attention was drawn back to his hair as she noticed each spike was tipped with a small golden bell that jingled as he moved his head.

"Feh," the man growled, his voice deep and rumbling. "The enemies in this place just get more and more pathetic."

"I'm sorry, Ken-chan," the girl on his shoulder said, kicking her feet idly, "but I'm sure there'll be somebody much better up ahead!"

Hanabi whirled around to face them properly, still panting harshly under whatever weight was pressing her down, then blinked as the little girl was suddenly in her face, staring curiously.

"Is there something wrong with your eyes? Are you blind? That looks painful," the girl rattled off quickly, poking at Hanabi's face.

Hanabi slapped the girl's hand away – or tried to. When her hand made contact it felt like she'd just slapped a brick wall, and the girl's hand didn't move an inch.

"That wasn't very nice," the little girl pouted.

"Yachiru, quit playing with it. I'm bored."

"W-what are you two?" Hanabi asked as she stumbled back, her voice trembling.

The man didn't even answer her, just walking past at an easy pace. The girl glanced at him, then shrugged. "Sorry, Hollow-chan," the girl said apologetically, "but we're on important Death God business. Bye-bye."

The girl's hand blurred to her side, and Hanabi realized abruptly that she was going for a sword she hadn't even noticed she was wearing before. Then the sword was clear of its sheathe and blurring towards her head and-

* * *

><p>"Fufufu," the fake chuckled. "Looks like you bit off a little more than you could chew. Ah well, better luck next time."<p>

Hanabi slowly raised a trembling hand, feeling the unmarred, intact flesh of her face. A shudder wracked her body as she recalled the thankfully brief sensation of the sword cutting into her, but she managed to keep herself under control. Barely.

She was back in the Forest of Death, and as far as she could tell it was like she had never left.

"Would you like to try again? I've always been fond of 'An Intro-"

Hanabi was on her feet and running the next moment, putting as much distance as possible between herself and the insane fake person who ran that insane place.

"You'll be back!" the fake called, laughing.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: As I moved into the Tsunade Retrieval Arc, I realized something. The sequence of events there, especially Tsuande's mood swings and the abrupt "cure" of her hemophobia, are every bit as annoying and contrived as the Wave Arc in their own way. Attempting to write it, it felt like I had to hit each point in turn to have anything even remotely approaching the canon outcome.**

**Naruto has to get pissed off, Naruto has to remind Tsunade of Nawaki, he has to show off the Rasengan but not yet have it completed, she has to bet her necklace, Jiraiya has to get drugged, etc. etc.**

**As you can see, I decided to go a different route. It came about as I considered Tsunade's character and motivations and thought about how Shika and Sasuke would react. Shika wouldn't much care either way, but Sasuke... It also allowed me to dig into Sasuke's character a bit and imagine what he could have been like with the second visit to Trauma 'R Us. It's actually quite easy to forget what he was like before Itachi showed up, since what he's like afterward receives so much focus. **

**The Interlude is a bit of an experiment. Lots of game mechanics being applied to the real world without lampshading, lots of character interaction for Hanabi, and even some setup for future chapters. I'm not planning on doing these too often, but they'll be very handy to provide some insight into what characters other than Naruto are doing, especially as they move out on missions of their own.**

**Which will start next chapter, thankfully. At this point the rails have run out, and Naruto will have to start arranging teams and picking missions on his own. I'll also show off some ability experimentation via Sasuke and Hanabi, now that everyone is back in Konoha.**

**As for the Forest of DLC, the first person who can correctly ID all of the "New Challenges" (aside from Kenpachi, obviously) will be able to request any challenge they want (and will probably get it, unless it's just completely insane). As hints, I will say that the current list are drawn from a combination of books, anime/manga, and movies, and that all of them come from distinct settings. Feel free to send guesses via PM. I will update this AN when someone manages to succeed. **

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**

**Edit: I removed the Manual chapter (former chapter two) and just realized that may have screwed up the reviews for people who reviewed on the former chapter 8 (now chapter 7). Since I'm rather fond of getting reviews, please send me a PM or something if that happens and I'll try to figure out a fix/alternative. I know you can leave anon reviews as much as you want, iirc, so there's that option.**

**Update: Ian D. Rash managed to guess all of them first. For those who are curious, here's the full list:  
><strong>

'**A Bolt of Lightning' – 100 - Harry Potter (Harry Potter) - The name of the challenge is a reference to his scar. (I'll probably be using a fanfic version to present more of a challenge.)  
><strong>

'**A Single Scale' – Smaug (The Hobbit) - The name refers to the gap in his "armor" over his heart.  
><strong>

'**Do Not Let Me Die' – Sephiroth (Final Fantasy) - a quote from his theme song One-Winged Angel (in latin: "ne me mori facias")  
><strong>

'**Jingle Jangle' – Kenpachi (Bleach) - refers to the bells he wears in his hair  
><strong>

**'Manslayer' – Himura Battousai (Rurouni Kenshin) - refers to his nickname/title during the war  
><strong>

**'Mithril's Specialist' – Sagara Sousuke (Full Metal Panic!) - he works for the organization MITHRIL and refers to himself as a "specialist"  
><strong>

**'Old Time Religion' – Darth Vader (Star Wars) - his belief in the Force was referred to as a "religion", and "Old Time" was also a hint to "Long, Long Ago".  
><strong>

**'The Bird of Hermes' – Alucard (Hellsing) - a part of the quote written on his coffin  
><strong>

'**The Gaze of Time' – Raistlin Majere (Dragonlance) - his pupils are literally hourglass-shaped, and he sees everything as if it was withered by time  
><strong>

**'Trick Shot' – Vash The Stampede (Trigun) - refers to his beyond improbable aiming skills  
><strong>

'**Zero-Two' – Father Abel Nightroad (Trinity Blood) - refers to his designation as "Krusnik 02"  
><strong>


	9. Life Five: Ninja Survivor

I blinked, staring at Hanabi and wondering what the hell she was talking about when I heard Ero-sennin giggling to himself. I turned to see him scribbling frantically on a notepad.

"Not possible," the pervert repeated, still giggling.

"What are you-" I started to ask before Tsunade casually backhanded him down the street. What the _hell _was I thinking when I picked a fight with her, anyway?

The blonde Sannin had a small smirk on her face as well, though she wasn't laughing. "Are you going to introduce us, brat?" she asked.

Hanabi shook herself and turned to face Tsunade. Her eyes widened slightly, though her reaction was not as extreme as it had been before, and she collected herself quickly.

"My apologies, Hokage-sama," Hanabi said formally, bowing. "I am Hanabi Hyuuga, heiress to the Main Branch of the Hyuuga. On behalf of my clan, allow me to be the first to welcome you back to Konoha and wish you a long and successful reign."

Tsunade's expression soured as Hanabi spoke. "First of all," she said, "it's rather rude to keep your Byakugan on like that; I would think an _heiress_ would know that."

Hanabi blushed and her eyes returned to normal.

"Second of all, I'm not-"

"Ready to talk about that right now," Jiraiya interrupted smoothly as he returned, looking unruffled by his earlier violent departure. "We'll let you kids catch up, but we need to get to the Tower to take care of some official business."

Tsunade glared at Jiraiya but, after taking a quick look around and noting the crowd that was gathering, nodded slowly. "Let's go, pervert," she snapped, turning on her heel and walking down the street. Her eyes seemed to linger a little longer on Sasuke than the rest of us, but I wasn't sure.

Once they were gone and the crowd started to disperse, a lot of them talking excitedly about the new Hokage, I finally turned back to Hanabi. She was staring after Tsunade, looking worried.

"Don't worry about her," I tried to reassure her, "she's like that with everybody."

Hanabi turned to me again and nodded slowly, still looking a little shaken.

"So what were you talking about earlier, with-" I began to ask.

"I think we should talk about this _somewhere else_, don't you?" Shika asked pointedly. "Sasuke should probably come with us as well."

"I guess," I muttered. "My place?"

"Why does this have to do with me?" Sasuke asked curiously. "I've never even met her before."

"Trust me," Shika said firmly, "you'll want to hear this."

* * *

><p>We entered my apartment a few minutes later and settled down around the kitchen table. Sasuke was looking around curiously, noting the sparse decorations and secondhand furniture that filled the rooms.<p>

"So," I tried again, "what were you talking about earlier?"

"Why do you have so much chakra?" she asked, her eyes boring into mine.

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused.

Her eyes narrowed in annoyance before she closed them and let out a small sigh. "It started the day after you guys left me behind. Now, whenever I activate my Byakugan and focus on someone, I can see a set of numbers floating next to them."

Shika straightened in his seat, his gaze sharp, while Sasuke just look confused.

"Father had the numbers '2886', while the teachers in the Academy ranged from seven hundred to just over fourteen hundred. Based on that, I concluded that the numbers must indicate chakra reserves in some form, and since the numbers never changed they must indicate maximum reserves.

"After that I could roughly estimate the skill and experience of a ninja based on those numbers, and it generally seemed to be accurate with what I knew beforehand. For instance, the new Hokage has '4875' and Jiraiya-sama has '5129', as I would expect of such powerful and famous ninja.

"_You_," she practically hissed, "have '99999'."

My mouth dropped open in shock. I knew I had chakra to spare, but more than Ero-sennin and Tsunade _combined_? How could I possibly- oh. That damn fox was probably responsible for that.

"You know something," she said, sounding pleased. "Both you and Shikamaru just looked like you figured something out. You know _exactly _why you have that much chakra, don't you? That's probably your advantage Father was talking about, too."

"What are you going on about?" Sasuke asked, annoyed. "What's all this talk about numbers and chakra?" His gaze swiveled to me, his eyes narrowed. "Is this another one of your jokes? They're seriously getting old."

"He doesn't know? But... you recruited him! How can he not know?" Hanabi asked.

"I haven't been recruited for anything," Sasuke snapped.

A shrill whistle pierced the air, and I winced before turning to look at Shika. He was on his feet, looming over the table with a determined expression. "One thing at a time," he said firmly. "Hanabi, we decided to wait until we got back to explain things to Sasuke, since we didn't have a way to _prove _any of this until now. We need to deal with that first.

"Sasuke, all those comments about achievements and things being unlocked were not Naruto's doing."

"Then who? You?"

Shika shook his head. "We don't know _who _is doing it really, but we're starting to figure out how all of this works."

"All of _what_?" Sasuke pressed.

Shika nodded to me, and after a moment I figured out what he was asking for.

"Characters," I said firmly.

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Sasuke Uchiha**

**Shikamaru Nara**

"The ventriloquism jutsu isn't... going to... what did you _do_?" he asked, staring around the room. His Sharingan activated, the _tomoe _spinning wildly. "This isn't a genjutsu!"

"It all started when I died at the end of the Chuunin Exams..." I began.

* * *

><p>Sasuke remained silent as my explanation wound down. I'd given him more or less the same speech I'd given Chibi, with some additional input from both her and Shika, and Sasuke had listened without his expression changing at all.<p>

"And, well, here we are," I finished.

Sasuke nodded slowly, turning to look at Shika and Chibi for a moment, then back to me. The other two watched him warily, hardly seeming to breathe as they waited for his reaction.

"Can you turn this off?" he asked, waving his hand vaguely through the air.

"Oh, uh, right. Cancel."

Sasuke nodded to me, still with no expression on his face, then stood and walked out of the room. A few seconds later I heard the door to my apartment open and then close gently.

"Uh..."

"I think we should follow him," Shika said quietly. Hanabi nodded her agreement, her Byakugan already activated once again.

* * *

><p>We trailed him to one of the less used training grounds along the outskirts of the village. It wasn't even that hard; he just walked along the street, his methodical pace eating up the distance. Some of the students from the school tried to talk to him only to be brushed off without a single flicker of acknowledgment. I noticed a few of the older ninja watching him as he went, knowing looks on their faces, but they just shook their heads and continued on their way.<p>

Once we finally got to the training ground, Sasuke just walked up to one of the posts and started at it for the longest time. It was kinda creepy, actually, but none of us did anything to interrupt him. Whatever he was doing, I got the feeling that he needed to follow through with it.

Eventually, Sasuke's shoulders began rising and falling like he was taking deep breaths, and he was holding his hands up in clenched fists in front of him. I thought he was going to start punching the post or something – it's the kind of thing I would have done.

Instead he started throwing out what looked like every jutsu I'd ever seen or heard of and a bunch more I hadn't. A lot of them involved fire, and when he'd reduced the first post to ashes he just seamlessly switched to the next one, and then the next one after that. He finished up by charging up a Chidori, driving his hand through the wood of a nearby tree with a loud scream of rage.

After that, he collapsed in front of the tree and leaned his back against the trunk, occasionally shaking slightly. I thought it'd be ok to approach him now, and Shika and Chibi followed me across the damaged training ground.

"You know, _dobe_," Sasuke said, his voice tinged with amusement, "if I thought your sense of humor was sick enough to pull something like this, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have waited until I was alone to do that."

"Right. Yeah. No jokes here," I said quickly. I mean, I was still sure I could take Sasuke if I really wanted to, but after that display I got the feeling it would probably hurt. A lot.

He looked up at me, his Sharingan activated and the three _tomoe _in each eye turning around his pupils lazily. "You don't get it, do you?" He turned to look at Shika and Hanabi. "None of you do. Not really." He pulled himself to his feet, a sick grin on his face as he started to gesture expansively. "It took me a little bit, too, but think about it."

He pointed at me. "Starts in all of this by himself, no help, no guidance, nothing. Gets killed over and over until he's good enough, or lucky enough, to not quite die this time. Only it's all fucked up anyway, but he can't fix it now, can he? Better luck next time!"

He whirled towards Shika. "The smart guy, the _lazy _one. Bored, needs a challenge. But not too easy, oh no. Can't have that. Gotta keep it fresh, interesting. Change the _rules_." He giggled slightly, and I felt the hair on the back of my neck standing up. Sasuke looked toward Chibi next, who was wavering between looking scared and defiant.

"The little one who gets dumped into the middle of everything. Gets to see all the big, important things happening just out of reach, but is too young to take part, not yet ready to help out. Stick around, you'll get your chance! And then there's _me_." His voice went completely flat at that, and I suppressed a shiver.

"The one who wants to change it all, to undo it, only you can't go back too far, oh no, where's the fun in that? You can redo it as much as you want, but everything's still shit so you might as well deal with it. Again and again and again and-" he cut himself off abruptly, fixing me with an intense stare as if trying to convince me of something with just his gaze alone.

"It's all one. Big. Fucking. _Joke_."

He leaned back against the tree, his hands fisting through his hair as he laughed bitterly to himself.

I'd seen a lot more emotion out of Sasuke in the last few days than I had in the months and months I'd been on Team Seven with him, but I wasn't really sure I liked it. He was the one who was too stuck up to act like he knew how to have fun, the one who acted like all the training and studying was beneath him because he already knew how to do it all, the one who would kick ass because he was just _had _to show me up... not this kid who looked like he was hanging on by a thread, ready to fall apart at the seams.

I wasn't shocked, though. I wasn't sad to see him like this, to see Shika looking stunned or Chibi looking lost and scared. I wasn't disappointed that Sasuke wasn't really the emotionless badass he tried to act like.

What I was, was _pissed_.

"That's _bullshit_!" I shouted, waving my arms through the air. "So what if it's some giant fucking joke? So what if somebody's doing this just to screw with us? Every day we're gonna get stronger, and smarter, and faster! Every day we'll be better prepared for the next time! Every day we'll get that much closer to figuring out just what the hell is going on!"

Sasuke's eyes were wide as he stared at me, surprise etched on his face, and Shika and Chibi were watching me with similar expressions.

"And when we do?" I growled, jabbing my hand out to poke Sasuke in the chest. "We're gonna stare 'em right in the eyes and let 'em know just who they've been messin' with! We're Konoha ninja, and _nobody _fucks with us! Not them, not the stupid fox, _nobody_!"

My hand was clenched into a fist, and I whirled around and stalked a short distance away before I ended up slugging Sasuke in his idiotic face. It was just like him to get all broody over this kind of thing, even if his brooding had an extra dash of crazy to go along with it this time. No way was I going to just sit back and take this crap. Hell, he hadn't even had to put up with this crap when he had no clue what was going on, so where did he get off-

"_Damn_," Chibi breathed, sounding awed.

I turned to find her staring at me wide-eyed. Shika was rubbing his temples and muttering under his breath and Sasuke was staring off to the side with his arms crossed. After a few moments of awkward silence, he coughed into his fist and shrugged uncomfortably.

"So," Sasuke said, finally looking straight at me. "What now?"

* * *

><p>"Hello, Akimi-oba-san. Is Chouji home?" Shikamaru asked, a polite smile on his face.<p>

* * *

><p>"Alright," Chouji shrugged before he popped another chip in his mouth.<p>

**Chouji Akimichi has been recruited!**

I blinked rapidly, staring at Chouji as if I'd never seen him before.

Maybe I hadn't.

"That's _it_?" Chibi burst out, jumping to her feet. "That's all you've got to say? We're stuck in this... this... this! And all you're gonna say is 'alright'?"

I glanced over at Shikamaru, who had a pleased grin on his face. It was the most emotion I'd ever seen him express at one time that didn't involve complaining about how "troublesome" something was.

Chouji shrugged again. "Shika's cool with it," he added, as if that actually explained anything. He paused, blinking for a moment, then looked over at his friend. "When we gonna bring Ino in?"

Shika's smile slipped, and his head dropped to the table. "Troublesome," he groaned. "I guess we have to, though."

Chouji nodded firmly before he turned his attention back to his chips.

Shika looked up again, turning his attention back to me. "Who next? We went after my choice, so it's really only fair that you guys pick the next ones."

"Sakura!" I said firmly, crossing my arms.

"Neji," Sasuke said, leaning forward to place his elbows on the table.

I whipped around to stare at him, shocked. "Neji? Why would you say Neji? Sakura's your teammate and Neji's... not! Not to mention he's a complete asshole!"

"Neji graduated as Rookie of the Year, and he had a much better showing in the prelims. If we're going to prioritize based on skill and utility, we should recruit him next."

"Sakura has plenty of skill!" I defended. "She defeated Ino _and _Chouji – no offense, Chouji," I added. The Akimichi just shrugged, not looking bothered at all.

"Well," Chibi said suddenly, looking thoughtful. "To be honest, if you're going to recruit another Hyuuga, I wouldn't choose Neji."

Everyone looked over at her, though I wasn't sure if they were more surprised she'd jumped in at that point or by what she'd said. I wasn't sure which _I _was more surprised by either.

"Neji-nii-san doesn't work well with others," Hanabi said, fidgeting slightly, "even on his own team. He's also not likely to get along with Naruto very much after what happened in the Chuunin Exams. I do not feel he would be a suitable addition to our group at this time."

"Exactly!" I said, pointing at Sasuke triumphantly. "See, even Hanabi thinks he's an asshole!"

"Hn," Sasuke grunted, his eyes narrowed. "Who would you suggest, then?"

Chibi fidgeted a little more, then lifted her chin and said, "Hinata-nee-chan."

Sasuke immediately scoffed. "Her? Didn't Neji crush her in the prelims?"

Chibi's face started to turn red, but before she could reply I beat her to it. "Hinata's awesome!" I snapped at Sasuke. "Just because she lost to Neji that one time doesn't mean anything! Give her some time and she'll be able to kick his ass any day of the week. I'd totally pick her over Neji any time!"

Sasuke stared at me for a few seconds before he shook his head slightly. "Even so, Neji has a lot more to offer _right now_. Besides, it's not like we can't get both of them, right?"

Shika decided to join in at this point. "That's true in the long-term, but we don't want to add too many people too quickly. There's still a lot we don't understand, and there could be consequences to recruiting people. The..." he frowned for a second, then continued, "the Overseer for whatever this is is obviously aware of what we are doing and is keeping track of it all for some purpose.

"I propose that we try to recruit the rest of our teammates first, and include Team Kurenai in it as well. We all know each other and work together fairly well, after all."

"What about me?" Chibi asked quietly. "I'm not on _any _team right now."

"We can look into recruiting whoever you get paired up with," Shika said, glancing at me.

"Of course we will," I reassured Chibi.

She nodded uncertainly, looking small and very young. "Could... could we recruit Nee-chan now?" she asked, a slight quaver in her voice. "You're going to recruit her anyway, right?"

"Sure!" I said immediately, shooting her a grin.

"Great!" Chibi said, suddenly looking cheerful and energetic. She jumped up and grabbed my arm, hauling me out of my chair and pulling me towards the door with surprising strength. "Let's go!"

"Troublesome..." Shika sighed, his head banging onto the table.

"And _he's _the one that controls all of this?" I heard Sasuke ask before Chibi managed to haul me all the way outside. "We're doomed."

* * *

><p>"Welcome back, Hanabi-sama," the guard greeted as we approached the Hyuuga compound. Chibi had eventually let go of my arm, though she was quick to grab hold of me again if I even looked like I was going to lag behind. Sasuke, Chouji, and Shika were trailing along behind us, talking about something among themselves.<p>

Well, Sasuke and Shika were talking. Chouji didn't look like he was saying much, though he did add something every now and then.

"Shall I escort your guests to the receiving room?" the guard asked next, already motioning for another guard to join him.

"No, I'll..." Hanabi began, then paused. "Actually, escort those three to the receiving room. Uzumaki-san will remain with me for the time being."

"Uh, Hanabi," I started, frowning.

"As you wish, Hanabi-sama," the guard replied, interrupting me. The new guard steered the other three towards a large building while Hanabi started walking towards a different building set off to the side. Sasuke looked like he was going to say something, but eventually just shook his head and went along without complaint.

I noticed a third guard falling in a few steps behind us, though he didn't say anything and Hanabi didn't even acknowledge that he was there.

"Hanabi," I tried again.

"Nee-san is currently in the library studying, so this is the perfect time to talk to her."

"Hanabi," I said a little more sharply.

She paused and turned to face me, looking up at me with a confused expression and wide, innocent eyes. "Yes, Uzumaki-san?"

"What's going on? Why did you send everybody else to the resting room or whatever, and why do you keep calling me that?"

Her eyes darted behind me for a moment. "It would be impolite to refer to you as anything else, Uzumaki-san," she said. "As for the others, they were not needed for this initial discussion. It is simpler to speak with Nee-san ourselves before we involve the other genin.'

I scratched my cheek for a moment, then sighed. Chibi was acting all super formal again; I hadn't seen her like this since her dad had found us arguing in Hinata's hospital room. I guess something about being around other Hyuuga made her like this.

"Whatever," I said. "Let's go talk to Hinata."

* * *

><p>"Oh, Hanabi-chan. Did you- eep!" Hinata suddenly squeaked as she spotted me. She ducked her head, half hiding behind the scroll she had been reading before she drew in a deep breath and slowly lowered it.<p>

"Hey, Hinata-chan!" I said, waving at her.

Her face slowly turned red as she hesitantly waved back, her eyes darting between me and Chibi.

"H-Hello, Naruto-kun. H-How are you?"

"Doing great!" I replied cheerfully.

"Nee-san," Chibi interrupted. "Uzumaki-san and I have something to discuss with you."

* * *

><p>"S-So you're lived through this mul-multiple times?" Hinata asked as she slowly scanned the currently gray Academy.<p>

"Yeah," I replied, nodding. "Only now I have people who can help me out! I've been doin' a lot better ever since Shika got caught up in all this with me, and with you guys I'm sure it'll be even better!"

Hinata nodded distractedly before turning to look at me. "A-And you w-want _me_?"

"Of course I do," I said indignantly. "You've been helping me out before you even knew what was going on! Remember that Arm- er, army question I asked a while back? You figured it out like it was nothin', and I got a kickass ability out of it! Why _wouldn't _I want you?"

Hinata ducked her head while her face flushed, but then she nodded rapidly. "O-Ok. I'll do it."

**Hinata Hyuuga has been recruited! **

**Maximum Ninja Recruitment reached! To recruit more ninja characters, you must first advance to chuunin!**

"... What," Sasuke said flatly, his face twitching.

"Troublesome," Shika sighed. "I _knew _there was going to be a catch."

* * *

><p>We took care of leveling up after that. Sasuke went with the Ninjutsu affinity trait and dumped all of his points into ninjutsu as well, while picking up his fifth point in the Overpower ability. Shika took a fifth point in Kage Haru and chose the Ninjutsu affinity trait as well.I wanted to do that too, but he eventually convinced me that Taijutsu affinity would do more for me, especially since one of the main benefits of ninjutsu skill was using less chakra, something I didn't have to worry about.<p>

Hanabi put all of her points in taijutsu and took her fifth point in Fleet of Foot, as well as choosing the Hidden Blade trait. I wasn't sure why, but the thought of being sneaky seemed to appeal to her. Not like she needed help, since she was already small enough and fast enough to get the drop on me more often than not.

Hinata and Chouji were already level ten and didn't have the option to level up, but both of them took it in stride.

After that, moved to the training grounds to begin what Shika referred to as our experiments. It didn't take me long to notice that floating words had shown up here as well.

**Practice**

**Sparring**

"Hey, wait up a sec," I called out, causing the group to slow and turn to look at me.

"What is it, _dobe_?" Sasuke asked, still visibly irritated.

"There's more floating words here. It's, uh, training and, uh, fake fighting," I tried, attempting to explain what the words were without actually saying them.

Shika's brow furrowed for a moment. "Fake fighting as in sparring?"

I nodded quickly.

"And the other one is... lessons? Exercise? Practice?"

"That one!" I said, pleased that he'd gotten it.

"What's the difference?" Sasuke asked, crossing his arms.

"At a guess, I'd say practice is alone and sparring is against other people. Not sure why we _need _a dedicated practice area, though," Shika said.

"S-So we should, um, try sparring, then?" Hinata asked hesitantly. Hanabi nodded from beside her while scanning the area as if trying to locate the words for herself.

"Works for me," I said. "Sparring."

**Welcome to the Training Grounds! As this is your first visit, please listen to the following explanation carefully. **

**Sparring is intended to allow characters to become used to their abilities and skills in a risk-free environment. Sparring allows a minimum of two individuals or a maximum of two full teams to face one another in combat. No experience or skill is gained while sparring, but any wounds suffered or abilities spent are returned at the end of the sparring session. **

**To begin sparring, simply designate which characters will be taking part and which team they will be on. Once you have done that, the spar will begin. A spar continues until one side has been defeated or surrenders.**

**Please designate the members of Team One. **

"Awesome!" I called out, grinning widely. "Man, I wish I could have used this before!"

"Hn," Sasuke grunted. "It sounds like you can't get any stronger with this."

"Still," Shika countered, "it could be just the thing we needed." He glanced around, then nodded. "We've got six people, so I say we go for two full teams and try it out."

No one else objected, so I nodded, then paused again. "Ok, but who is on which team?"

We eventually settled on me, Sasuke, and Hinata as Team One and Shika, Chouji, and Hanabi as Team Two. Once I had done that, we found ourselves in the middle of a training ground, even though we'd just been outside a few seconds ago. We'd also been separated into our teams.

Hinata looked really jumpy, staring around wildly as if expecting to be attacked at any moment. Sasuke was handling it much better, an eager gleam in his eye as he scanned around with his Sharingan.

"Alright," Shika's voice called out from across the clearing. "Let's pair off and see if we can figure out anything else useful."

* * *

><p>"Fleet of Foot!" Hanabi called out. A moment later she slapped Sasuke on the back and then appeared on the far side of the clearing, giggling the whole way.<p>

"Tag! You're it!" she shouted, laughing as she ran into the forest.

Sasuke blinked, his Sharingan spinning rapidly as he processed what had just happened.

* * *

><p>"I <em>will <em>get you back for this, _teme_," I growled.

"Suck it up, _dobe_. We're supposed to be figuring out how all this works, remember? Now block! Overpower!"

I lowered my stance, bringing my arms up defensively in front of my face and torso. Not that it made a difference, since Sasuke blew through my guard like it wasn't even there, landing a series of hits that culminated with an uppercut that lifted me off my feet and dropped me on my back.

I worked my jaw for a moment, wondering how it wasn't broken after that, then hauled myself back up to my feet. He was looking at me with a wide, satisfied grin on his face.

"Gotta admit, _dobe_, right now this whole thing isn't so bad."

"My turn," I growled after I spat out a mouthful of blood. "Kage Bun-"

"Dodge," he said quickly, his smirk growing wider.

"-shin Barrage!" I finished, groaning.

That lasted until my clone's heel kick smashed into Sasuke's face, knocking _him _on his ass. He stared up at me blankly, a shocked expression on his face.

"I _love_ shadow clones," I told him.

* * *

><p>"F-First Aid," Hinata called out hesitantly.<p>

The bruises and cuts I had gathered over the course of our testing immediately faded, though not all of them disappeared completely. Still, I felt a whole lot better than I had before.

"That's awesome, Hinata-chan!" I called out, grinning at her. "And that's just the first one, too. The other's are supposed to be even better!"

I was a little worried by how red her face was, but she had the biggest smile I'd seen on her yet, so I guess she was fine.

* * *

><p>"Dodge!" Hanabi called out.<p>

"Kage Mane!" I heard Shikamaru bark a moment later.

The shadows around Hanabi's feet thickened, but she kept running without so much as slowing. Shika's shadow extended a moment later, but just before it would have made contact with her it seemed to veer to the side. Even when she stepped directly on it nothing happened.

"Got you!" Hanabi cheered as she tapped Shika in the chest a moment later.

Shika grumbled to himself, though he didn't really seem that upset.

"So it works on normal ninjutsu as well. It's really weird to lose control of my shadows like that, though," he said, "I didn't feel anything wrong, but they just refused to make the connection with your shadow."

* * *

><p>"Now this is the one I've been wondering about the most," Shika admitted. He was was standing across from me, Sasuke, and Hinata with Chouji and Hanabi by his side. "Only Chouji and I have the Link ability, though, so according to the description Hanabi won't be a part of this. We'll see what happens, I guess."<p>

He looked over at Chouji, who nodded firmly in reply.

"Link!" Shika said firmly.

Shika's shadow suddenly darted out, latching onto all three of us and locking us in place. "Shadow Possession Success!" Shika called out.

Chouji was already moving, his arm growing at an alarming rate as he charged across the short distance the separated us. His hand drew back in a fist before thrusting forwards with all of his weight and momentum behind it. Chouji's giant hand was the only thing I could see before it made contact and I was flung backwards, slamming into a tree on the far side of the clearing with a sharp crack.

It wasn't quite the hardest I'd ever been hit – Orochimaru had that distinction – but it still _hurt_. I groaned as I picked myself up off the ground, shaking my head to clear the ringing and clutching at my ribs that were protesting every movement. I looked over to see Sasuke doing the same, although by the way his arm was hanging he had taken the hit even worse than I had.

Hinata wasn't getting up at all.

"_Oh, come on!" I cried out when I found myself outside of my body again. Shika's team was scrambling to defend themselves as I leapt across the clearing, a roar pouring from my mouth and my claws swiping wildly._

* * *

><p><strong>Winner: Team One (Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha, Hinata Hyuuga)<strong>

"Naruto..." Shika said slowly as he rubbed at his chest. "We have _got _to figure out how to stop that."

"No argument from me," I muttered apologetically.

* * *

><p>"I'm telling you, this place is <em>insane,<em>" Chibi said, gesturing wildly. "There was this huge guy with bells in his hair, and some little girl sitting on his shoulder, but she was _fast_. Faster than anyone I've ever seen."

"Hn," Sasuke muttered. "We'll see about that."

"Like you're one to talk, slowpoke," Chibi countered. "You couldn't even catch _me._"

Sasuke scoffed, though I noticed he didn't actually say she was wrong.

**Records**

**Challenges**

**New Opponents **

We finally reached the place Chibi was talking about, and the moment I laid eyes on it I believed every word of what she had been saying based solely on who was waiting for us.

"Crazy Snak- I mean, Anko-sama!" I corrected myself quickly, swallowing nervously. "I-It's good to see you?"

"Fufufu," she said, strolling towards me. "Has my favorite pincushion come to have a little more fun?" She glanced over at Hanabi and smirked. "I _told _you you'd be back."

"It's not really her," Hanabi said, though I noticed she wasn't moving any closer. "It's like with Umino-sensei during the Lessons."

I gulped. "That just means there's _two _of them," I said hoarsely.

Hanabi thought about that for a moment, then shivered.

"So!" Anko said, clapping her hands together. "What will it be? Want to take another crack at the Challenges you've already tried, or see if you have what it takes to handle a new opponent? We've gotten some new ones in since the last time you were here, and believe me when I say that they aren't playing around!"

She pulled a scroll from her pocket and flicked it open, scanning it quickly. "You are a 135 right now, in case you were wondering."

"Why not?" I said. "New Opponents."

'**A Bolt of Lightning' – 100**

'**A Single Scale' – 100**

**'Dark Evangelist' – 100***

'**Do Not Let Me Die' – 100**

**'Empress of the Sea' – 100***

**'Flash Goddess' – 100***

**'It's Good To Be The King' – 250***

**'Manslayer' – 100**

**'Mithril's Specialist' – 100**

**'Old Time Religion' – 100**

**'Quick Change' – 100***

**'Suitably Powerful' – 100***

**'The Bird of Hermes' – 100**

'**The Gaze of Time' – 100**

**'Trick Shot' – 100**

'**Zero-Two' – 100**

"That's a lot more than I remember," Chibi pointed out.

"What about all the ones that were unlocked the first time you came here?" Shika asked.

"Oh, I guess those are under challenges."

I shrugged. "Cancel. Challenges."

'**An Introduction To Pain' – Suggested Level – None**

'**Teacher, Teacher' – Suggested Level - 5**

'**Cold As Ice' – Suggested Level – 7**

'**Shadow of the Demon' – Suggested Level – 8**

'**A Useful Tool' – Suggested Level – 10**

'**A Freak, A Creep, and the Other One' – Suggested Level – 12**

'**Sand Trap' – Suggested Level – 15**

**'Jingle Jangle' – Suggested Level – 60**

"Oh," Hanabi whispered faintly, looking pale. Even Sasuke looked faintly surprised at that last one.

"_Sixty_?" I asked. "How long is it going to take to get to level _sixty_? Man, I hope the others aren't that bad."

"Still trying to make a decision?" Anko interrupted, rocking back and forth on her heels. "You could always try my personal favorite, 'An Introduction To Pain'."

"Well, we're definitely not trying Jing- that one right now," I muttered. I glanced around, but no one had anything to suggest. "Sure. An introduction to pain."

Anko threw back her head and cackled. "You sure? This one'll hurt, you know."

"It's not like it's permanent."

"Alright, name your team."

I might as well stick with what we had in the spars. "Me, Sasuke, and Hinata."

* * *

><p>I stumbled slightly as I was dumped into the middle of what looked to be the Forest of Death, with Sasuke and Hinata right next to me.<p>

"Alright, kiddies," Anko's voice called out, seeming to come from all around us. "Here's how this works."

"Can you see her?" I whispered to Hinata, who quickly activated her Byakugan then shook her head.

"If you manage to defeat your opponent in the challenge, you'll gain some experience and might even learn a thing or two in the process. You can keep trying as long as you want, but you only get rewarded for beating them the first time.

"Unless..." she said slowly, drawing out the word into a hiss, "you want to crank things up a notch. In that case, you can try the same opponent again, but they won't be holding back as much. Or at all."

I suddenly had a bad feeling about this.

"Allow me to demonstrate."

It was at that point that a horde of snakes appeared out of nowhere, jaws wide and fangs dripping with venom. I caught a glimpse of Anko herself appearing in front of me, eyes wide with bloodlust and a kunai in each hand. They flashed and-

* * *

><p>"Holy crap," I groaned, one hand covering my eye. "And I thought <em>training <em>with her was bad."

Hinata just whimpered, her arms wrapped around herself as she took several steps away from the fake Anko. Sasuke didn't move, though his fists were trembling and his jaw was clenched tight.

"I _love _that one," Anko purred as she rubbed her hands together slowly. "Wanna try again?"

"No!" I yelped, stepping back. "We'll, uh... we'll come back later," I told her, then turned and began walking away quickly. The rest of the group followed me, Sasuke and Hinata silently and the others looking at us curiously.

* * *

><p>We wandered around the village for a bit, discussing what we had uncovered during the spar, before we ran into a large crowd of people gathered outside of the Hokage's Tower.<p>

"What's goin' on?" I asked.

Someone in the crowd glanced over at me. "They're making an announcement about the Hokage," she said distractedly, still craning her head trying to get a better view.

"You think?" I asked as I looked over at Sasuke and Shika, who met my gaze and nodded.

"Citizens of Konoha!" an older man's voice called out, easily carrying over the din of the crowd. "Thank you for coming today. After a long and exhaustive process that carefully evaluated the merits of each and every ninja in this mighty village, the Council has finally reached a consensus!"

The crowd cheered for a moment before quieting down again.

"While Konoha is proud to boast many ninja who carry the Will of Fire in their hearts and who would be able to lead this village to ever greater heights, our final choice exemplifies both the proud history of Konoha and its boundless potential for the future greater than any other.

"Our new Hokage has lead our ninja to victory in the past, and will surely do so in the future! Our new Hokage is personally responsible for saving the lives of many ninja both on and off the field of battle, nourishing Konoha in ways few others could have imagined before! Our new Hokage is feared and revered across the Elemental Nations for both her wisdom and her strength!

"It is my honor and pleasure to introduce to you the Fifth Hokage of Konoha, Tsunade Senju!"

As the crowd erupted into a thunderous roar, I turned to Shika with a confused expression.

"I thought she said she wasn't going to do it?"

* * *

><p><strong>Missions<strong>

**Records**

**Promotion Test**

"Promotion test," I said firmly. After all, we had a new Hokage now, so I should be able to do it, right?

**Chouji Akimichi**

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Hinata Hyuuga**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Sasuke Uchiha**

**Shikamaru Nara**

"Naruto Uzumaki."

**Naruto Uzumaki is currently not eligible for promotion. Naruto Uzumaki must complete – four missions of C-rank or above – before he can take the promotion test.**

"Well that sucks," I muttered. I ran down the list for the others, and found that Sasuke had the same result while Chouji and Hinata had to complete five C-ranks or above each. Hanabi and Shika, on the other hand...

**Hanabi Hyuuga is currently not eligible for promotion. Hanabi Hyuuga must complete – ten missions D-rank or higher; a minimum of two C-rank missions – before she can take the promotion test.**

**Shikamaru Nara is currently not eligible for promotion. Shikamaru Nara must complete – fifteen C-rank missions as leader; five B-rank missions as leader; one A-rank mission – before he can take the promotion test.**

"Well, looks like no one's getting promoted right now," I muttered sourly. I was stuck as a genin for four more missions, which was just stupid. At least Sasuke was in the same boat, though.

"What missions do we have right now?" Shika asked, snapping me out of my funk.

"Missions."

**Available Missions:**

**Catch Tora! – Retrieve Madam Shijimi's cat. Rank: D Reward: 100 ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**Grocery Run – Fill the client's shopping list. Rank: D Reward: 50+ ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**The Stolen Necklace – Someone has stolen the client's family heirloom. Capture the thief and return it. Rank: C Reward: 400 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

**Missing-nin: Aoba Satsuma – A missing-nin has been sighted within the Land of Fire. Eliminate them. Rank: C Reward: 1000 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

"Great, _more _D-ranks," I groaned.

"Um," Hinata said slowly. "C-Can we really just... take th-these missions? Don't we need to t-talk to our teachers?"

"It doesn't seem like it," Shika answered. "No one interfered when Naruto and I went on that mission with Jiraiya. In fact, it seemed like they all knew about it."

"Asuma-sensei?" Chouji asked.

"Not a word," Shika replied.

"So, what missions are we taking?" Hanabi asked, bouncing on her feet. She seemed really excited for some reason.

"Well, there's a problem with that," Shika said. "We've only got one chuunin right now: me."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Sasuke growled.

"It means that only one team can take a C-rank mission. The other is stuck with a D-rank."

"I am _not _doing D-ranks," Sasuke said immediately, crossing his arms.

"Me either!" I said right behind him. "I've had enough of those to last a lifetime!"

Shika frowned, then turned to look at the rest of the group.

"I don't want to do D-ranks either," Hanabi declared. "If they suck that much, why should we be stuck doing them?"

"Hanabi-chan," Hinata said gently, laying a hand on her sister's shoulder. She looked over at me, blushing slightly, then turned to face Shika. "S-Since Naruto-kun and Sasuke-san on-only need four missions, they should go with you. That way th-they will be promoted faster, an-and we'll have more chuunin."

Chouji nodded. "I can do D-ranks if I need to," he said to Shika.

Sasuke nodded in satisfaction, but for some reason I felt kinda embarrassed. I hadn't thought about the promotion part at all, I just didn't want to do more D-ranks. If it hadn't been for Hinata and Chouji, we could have been arguing over this for hours. I mean, there was no way Sasuke was going to back down, and there was no way I was going to let him go on C-ranks when I was stuck on D-ranks, and Chibi could be _really _stubborn...

But I also couldn't help but notice the way Shika was nodding gratefully to Hinata and Chouji, or the way Hanabi calmed down under Hinata's hand even if she looked annoyed. I mean, it was great that the argument seemed to be over so easily, but even if I was going to avoid yet another D-rank I didn't feel quite as happy about it anymore. In fact, I felt like I'd _lost _that argument somehow.

"Naruto," Shika called out, waving his hand in front of my face.

"Huh? What?"

"The missions?" he said, eying me oddly.

"Oh. Right. Uh, which one are we taking?"

He frowned at me slightly. "Sasuke wants to take the missing-nin mission, and I think we're ready for it. Chouji's team is going to take the Tora mission."

"Got it," I said, shaking myself. I'd worry about that other stuff later.

* * *

><p>My team – well, I guess right now it was Shika's team – had only been outside of Konoha an hour or so when something new happened.<p>

**Mission "Catch Tora" was successfully completed by Team Chouji (Chouji Akimichi, Hanabi Hyuuga, Hinata Hyuuga). XP: 100; Bonus XP: 0**

"Huh, cool," I said, looking over at Sasuke and Shika. "I guess we know when other teams complete missions.

Shika suddenly groaned. "Troublesome... I can't believe I missed that," he sighed, then looked at me. "How are they supposed to take another mission if you're out here?"

"... Crap," I muttered. I hadn't thought about that either.

**Team Chouji (Chouji Akimichi, Hanabi Hyuuga, Hinata Hyuuga) is requesting mission "Whitewashing" (D, 75 ryo, Up to one day). Approved?**

"Uh, yes," I said. Nothing seemed to happen after that, so I guess that was all I needed to do. "Like that?" I shrugged at Shika.

Sasuke snorted to himself, shaking his head. "Let's go," he told us. "We're still hours away from where the missing-nin was last sighted."

"Hey! You're not-" I abruptly cut myself off, frowning. For some reason I was thinking about Hinata and Chouji back in the mission office. My instinct was to tell Sasuke to shove it 'cause I didn't take orders from him, but was he wrong? I mean, before the whole mission thing came up that was exactly what we'd been doing.

"Not what?" Sasuke asked, a faint growl in his voice.

"Nevermind," I muttered, still frowning.

"Anyway," Shika said slowly, "Sasuke's right. We need to keep moving or this really _will _take a week."

I looked up to see Shika studying me with a curious expression, but I just shrugged and started hopping through the trees again.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: As the story continues I will be glossing over some of the administrative portions of the game in an effort to save time. In this case I haven't shown full stat sheets for Hinata, Sasuke, or Chouji, nor did I show Naruto leveling up. If there's enough interest I'll post the stat sheets somewhere for people to look at, but they'll only show up in the story every once in a while.**

**As I said in the AN for STC, I'll be scaling back chapter length a little so I can keep to my posting schedule more comfortably. Expect chapters in the 5-8k range moving forward, rather than 10k+.  
><strong>

**As for the challenges, I'll make the same offer as last time. The first person to correctly identify all of the new ones (the ones with asterisks) will get to name one of their own. Ian D. Rash managed to do so last time, and "It's Good To Be The King" was the challenge selected. There are a couple of people who have inside knowledge of the new challenges who aren't eligible for this, though. } : )  
><strong>

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!  
><strong>

**P.S. If anyone knows what's up with the line breaks or how to consistently get them to show up, I'd love to know.  
><strong>

**The challenge has been won by Sir Godot. The answers are below:**

**'Dark Evangelist' – Evangeline AK McDowell (Mahou Sensei Negima) - slight tweak to her nickname "Dark Evangel"  
>'Empress of the Sea' – Boa Hancock (One Piece) - known in-universe as the Pirate Empress<br>'Flash Goddess' – Yorouichi Shihouin (Bleach) - her nickname in-universe  
>'It's Good To Be The King' – Gilgamesh (FateZero Fate/Stay Night) - refers both to his actual position and his general attitude  
>'Quick Change' – Erza Scarlet (Fairy Tail) - refers to her specialty in ExQuip magic, allowing her to change armorclothing/weapons nigh instantly  
>'Suitably Powerful' – Samus Aran (Metroid) - terrible, terrible pun on her Power Suit<br>**

**Also, since so many people have asked for it I will be posting the character sheets online. The link, once it's up, can be found in my profile next to the manual.  
><strong>


	10. Life Five: Faster Than Ninjas

"That's him," Shika confirmed as they returned from their quick scouting trip. "I don't know about the six other ninja with him, though. I didn't recognize any offhand. Troublesome..."

I frowned and rubbed my chin thoughtfully. "Taking on just him is one thing, but seven at once?"

"Scared, _dobe_?" Sasuke asked, smirking at me.

"Like hell I am!" I snapped, turning to face him fully. "I could take all of them on by myself, _teme_!"

"Don't you two _ever _stop?" Shika groaned, cutting off Sasuke's reply. "I don't know if either of you can count, but we're outnumbered by more than two to one; the _last _thing we need to do is give away our position because you couldn't stop from bickering for five minutes."

I shrugged uncomfortably, not used to Shika actually snapping at me like that. Or snapping at _anyone _like that, really.

"Sorry," I muttered finally. Sasuke just grunted and looked away.

Shika looked back and forth between us for a moment, then sighed. "Let's just keep focused on the mission. Our new abilities will hopefully give us the edge when it comes to open combat, but I'd prefer to neutralize as many of the enemy ninja as possible first. Do either of you have any ideas on that front?"

My hand immediately shot up, waving eagerly in the air. "Yeah!" I said excitedly. "I could use my new kunai technique to take a bunch of them out at once!"

"The one you used on the bridge?" Sasuke asked quietly, a small frown on his face.

Some of my enthusiasm faded as I was reminded of the first time I'd used the technique in a real situation. "Yeah," I said, nodding.

"That'd work," he grunted.

"What technique is this?" Shika asked.

"Oh, it's the same one I used on Neji in the exams, just with kunai instead of rocks," I explained.

Shika froze for a moment, his eyes widening, then nodded slowly. "That would do it, yes. Still, we need to be aware of the possibility that the opponent could evade or negate the technique in some fashion. We'll have Naruto lead with that while Sasuke and I..."

~ Scene Break ~

I crept slowly into position, my eyes flickering back and forth across the small camp our target and his allies had set up. I had a clear view of all seven of the ninja, but I didn't have a good angle to definitely catch all of them in one attack just yet. Shika and Sasuke were positioned to my left and right, further back in the trees, waiting for my opening before they moved in.

"Gotta admit, Aoba, this is actually working out really well," one of the ninja commented, motioning with a kunai he held in his hand for emphasis. "The Land of Fire's borders were wide open and we haven't seen any patrols for days."

"Yeah," another one chimed in. "Easiest time I've had ever since I went missing. Greatest village my ass," he scoffed, spitting to one side.

Aoba lifted the flask he was drinking from in a small toast, acknowledging their praise. "I've got good sources," he said, smirking. "I wouldn't get too complacent, though. They could always send teams out to investigate the caravans we've been hitting. Just because we're making it look like bandit attacks doesn't mean they'll fall for it forever."

"So what if they do?" another one chimed in. "They just got their asses kicked by some no-name village. I heard that even the Hokage got killed. Old fucker probably keeled over after throwing a single punch."

My eyes narrowed into slits as I focused on that one; I was going to show him what happens to assholes who badmouth Hokage-jiji like that.

Just as I raised the kunai to throw it, I felt a tearing pain in my lower back. I let out a scream of pain as I whipped around, instinctively lashing out and catching my attacker with the kunai I had in my hand. It stabbed deep into his forearm as he quickly blocked, his eyes wide in surprise.

"Fast little shit, ain't ya?" he snarled, jerking the kunai out and flinging it aside.

I didn't answer. I was too busy gasping for breath and clawing at my back, trying to remove the blade this bastard had stuck in me. It wasn't as bad as some of the injuries I'd taken fighting Orochimaru, but then those would be pretty hard to top. It still hurt like hell, though, and every time I twisted to try to reach it it just got worse.

I was forced to stop when the ninja started advancing on me again, a cold expression on his face.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage," I snarled, gritting my teeth and forcibly shoving aside the pain. I could hear a commotion coming from the camp, which probably meant that the other ninja were fighting Sasuke and Shikamaru; I couldn't afford to waste any more time on this backstabbing jerk.

My clones piled on top of him, fists and feet pounding away. I activated Army of One while my opponent was dealing with them, not willing to give him – or anyone else, for that matter – a chance to land another blow like that one.

I could see the number of clones rapidly diminishing as the technique played out and charged forward before he had time to recover. He was already dazed from the clones' assault and I managed to land a few solid hits before he recovered.

He pulled another kunai from somewhere and swiped at my arm, trying to make me back off. I ignored the blade, letting it pass through my arm as I nailed him right in the face. His nose made a loud crunching sound and he dropped bonelessly to the ground.

I had a kunai stabbing into him before I consciously thought about it. He jerked once as it entered his heart, then lay completely still. I stared down at him for a moment, then shook my head and left, running as fast as I could towards the camp.

Two of the ninja with Aoba were down on the ground when I arrived. Three of them were moving in sync, twisting and turning at random. I could see Shika, his hands locked in a seal and his face set in grim concentration as he moved faster than I'd ever seen him, dodging the attacks of another ninja. Aoba himself was facing off against Sasuke, who was slowly but surely being forced back under the rapid flurry of blows Aoba was unleashing.

My head whipped back and forth for a second, trying to figure out who I should help. I didn't have time to think it through, though, so I went with my gut.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage," I shouted, pointing at Aoba even as my feet carried me towards the ninja targeting Shika. I repeated the attack on my own target before I plowed into him, two kunai leading the way.

"Overpower!" Sasuke shouted from where he was fighting Aoba, followed by the roar of flames.

My newest opponent let out a ragged gasp as he hit the ground, one hand flailing away as he tried to dislodge me and the other pawing at the kunai I'd stuck into him. I rolled back and leapt to my feet, pulling out two more kunai as I did so.

My own opponent jumped back to his feet, shaking off the hits he'd taken and focusing on me. He was in my face a moment later, his right hand snapping out in a jab so fast I could barely see it coming. I didn't even bother trying to dodge, instead launching my knee forward in what I thought of as the Anko Maneuver.

He folded over and another stab with a kunai ended him.

I turned back to find the three ninja Shika had been facing down and Aoba on the defensive, the ninja leaping quickly as he tried to avoid the shadows snapping at his feet and the bursts of fire Sasuke was sending out. It took me a moment to realize that he was being herded my way.

Another Barrage intercepted him in midair, knocking him about but doing little damage. It did distract him enough that he got caught by Shika's shadow, though, and after that he didn't have a chance.

~ Scene Break ~

"What the hell happened, _dobe_?" Sasuke asked, frowning as he crossed his arms.

"There weren't six more ninja," I shot back, turning to point back to where I had been ambushed. "There were _seven_."

Before I could continue, I heard Sasuke let out a sharp hiss. "Kami, _dobe_, what the hell are you doing?"

"Huh?" I asked. I only got more confused when he grabbed my shoulders to hold me still.

"Stop moving, you idiot! You'll just make it worse!"

"Make what... oh yeah," I muttered, wincing. "I almost forgot about that."

"_Forgot about it_?" Sasuke yelped. "You were stabbed in the back! Kami, it looks like it barely missed your spine! You're lucky it was as shallow as it was."

I frowned. It sure as hell hadn't _felt _shallow when it first happened, but it definitely wasn't hurting as much now as it had before.

Sasuke and Shika spent the next few minutes removing the kunai and patching me up, muttering about idiots and troublesomeness the whole time. By the end, I was convinced that they were more annoying than the wound itself was.

~ Scene Break ~

**Mission "Missing-nin: Aoba Satsuma" complete. XP: 1500; Bonus XP: 500**

"That's it?" I grumbled. "We got a _ton _more than that for finding that Tsunade lady."

"That's our Hokage now, Naruto," Shika chimed in tiredly. "I doubt she'd appreciate you talking about her like that."

"Fine, whatever," I muttered. "Still, I thought we would have gotten more than that. I mean, the others finished, like, a dozen D-ranks in the time we got that one mission done. They had to have gotten more XP than us by now!"

"It was fifteen D-ranks, and five hundred less XP, actually," Shika sighed. "D-ranks can be completed much faster, but they're worth a lot less, too. The C-rank was still better overall."

"Oh. Well... fine then."

"About time you guys got back," I heard Chibi call out, and turned to find her walking up to us along with Hinata and Chouji. "D-ranks were every bit as boring as I thought they'd be."

"Hanabi-chan," Hinata said softly, looking at her sister. Chibi just huffed and crossed her arms, looking away. "D-did everything go well on your mission?" Hinata asked then, looking at me.

"Yeah, it was awesome!" I replied, shooting her a thumbs up. "We totally kicked ass! I mean, it wasn't just that one Aoba guy either. He had a bunch of other missing-nin helping him, even if he was the strongest, but when they showed up we were like 'Ha, so what if you outnumber us!' and then I-

"Give it a rest, _dobe_," Sasuke groaned. "You can tell her all about it later. I just want to turn in the mission and go home."

I glared at Sasuke for interrupting me, but held back my first response and nodded. "Whatever, _teme_."

We made our way back to the Mission Room, where Iruka-sensei was waiting for us again. Once we'd turned in our C-rank and gotten our pay, I decided to check the available missions again.

**Available Missions:**

**Catch Tora! – Retrieve Madam Shijimi's cat. Rank: D Reward: 100 ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**Paint It... Pink? – Paint the client's house. Rank: D Reward: 50+ ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**The Stolen Necklace – Someone has stolen the client's family heirloom. Capture the thief and return it. Rank: C Reward: 400 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

**Missing-nin: Akita Gorobe – A missing-nin has been sighted within the Land of Fire. Eliminate them. Rank: C Reward: 1000 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

"_Another_ one?" I asked, surprised. Man, I thought missing-nin were a lot less common than that. The rest of the group didn't seem eager to take another mission right then, though, so I canceled it and left.

~ Scene Break ~

"So wait," I said, holding up one hand to interrupt Shika's explanation. "Hinata and Hanabi can use their Byakugan to see how much chakra somebody has, Sasuke can use his Sharingan to gain skill points for free, and _you _can tell how skilled somebody is just by looking at them?"

Shika shrugged. "Sort of. It only works when I'm actually fighting somebody, for some reason, and I only get a general sense. All it says is 'apprentice' or 'journeyman' or whatever."

"Man, you guys get all the cool stuff," I sighed. "So how good was that Aoba guy?"

"That's the part that's odd," Shika replied, frowning. "He was a chuunin when he went missing several years ago, but his best skill was still only apprentice. I would have thought he'd be a lot stronger than that."

"Hey... Shika, back when we were fighting Itachi and that blue guy, weren't you mumbling stuff about journeyman and so on?" I asked slowly as I tried to remember.

Shika looked a little uncomfortable when the others turned to look at him curiously.

"Did you do that to them?" Sasuke asked intently. "How strong were they? What were their weak points?"

"I don't remember," Shika said. "That was the first time it happened, and I really didn't understand what it meant at the time. It was only on this mission that it really clicked."

"You don't remember _anything_? Not a single skill?" Sasuke pressed, looming over him.

"Sorry," Shika said sarcastically. "I had other things on my mind at the time, like _not dying_."

"Useless," Sasuke growled before stalking away.

"Don't worry about it, Shika," Chouji said after a moment. "He'll get over it soon enough."

"He's probably just moping because his eyes can't do that," Chibi chimed in, smirking.

"Troublesome..." Shika muttered, dropping his head onto the table.

I looked back and forth between Shika and Sasuke, frowning.

~ Scene Break ~

"But I already have my kickass Army of- er, that thing! Why would I want to take Dodge? Besides, that Blood Rage things sounds awesome! Or I could take Summon Ally! Toads are awesome, so that _has _to be a kickass ability!"

Shika sighed again, rubbing his forehead. "Just let me explain, ok?"

"Fine," I muttered.

"Army of One is a powerful ability, no question. You did very well taking that first thing. However, it has one glaring weakness, remember?"

I frowned and crossed my arms. "Yeah, stuff like waves of dirt or water use it up."

"Right, wide-scale attacks." He scowled for a moment, adding to himself, "Even if it makes no sense."

"I know!"

"Anyway. From everything we've seen, if you use Dodge at the right time, you'll automatically evade those wide-scale attacks. Which means...?"

My eyes widened as I finally saw where he was going. "That it won't get used up!"

"Exactly."

"Why didn't you say so in the first place! Abilities, Dodge!"

**Naruto Uzumaki has selected Dodge. Is that correct?**

"Yes."

**Level Up Complete! You need 11,522 experience points to achieve Level Twelve.**

"About time," Sasuke muttered. "Now hurry up and do mine."

~ Scene Break ~

**Mission "Escort: Ryogi Ueno" complete. XP: 700; Bonus XP: 200**

"That _sucked_," I groaned. "That guy was worse than Tazuna-jiji!"

"You were the one who wanted to try it out," Sasuke reminded me smugly.

"Of course I did! Our last escort mission turned out _awesome_! We fought strong ninja and saved an entire country! All this guy did was talk about stupid _tea _the entire time! Even the bandit attack was boring!"

"I think you're both forgetting the important thing here," Shika said, butting in. "That was C-rank number four."

I blinked at him for a moment before letting out a loud whoop. "Finally!" I crowed. "Time to get promoted to chuunin!"

Sasuke was trying to act like he wasn't excited too, but I could still see him grinning.

~ Scene Break ~

"Promotion Test, Sasuke Uchiha."

**Sasuke Uchiha meets all requirements to test for promotion to chuunin. Do you want to proceed?**

"Yes."

"Sasuke Uchiha," a random ninja called out as he walked into the Mission Room. "If you'll follow me, we can begin your examination immediately."

Sasuke grunted and shoved his hands into his pockets as he followed the ninja out of the room, only pausing briefly to look back at us and nod before walking out.

"Alright then, my turn," I cheered. "Promotion Test, Naruto Uzumaki!"

**Naruto Uzumaki meets all requirements to test for promotion to chuunin. Do you want to proceed?**

"Yes!"

"Naruto Uzumaki," another random ninja called out. "If you'll follow me, we can begin your examination immediately."

I grinned widely as I waved to the rest of the group. "Alright guys, next time you see me it'll be Chuunin Naruto Uzumaki! Believe it!"

~ Scene Break ~

"Alright, genin," the chuunin said impatiently. "This first test will determine if you're even-"

"_First _test?" I yelped. "Nobody said there was more than one test! What the hell?"

The chuunin glared at me, then sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Yes, there are multiple tests involved in the promotion exam. Get over it. Now, as I was _saying_, the first test will determine if you're even remotely qualified to be a chuunin. A surprising number of candidates fail at this stage, which is why we moved it to the front."

I gulped nervously, wondering if it was gonna be another written test, but for real this time. If it was...

"All you have to do is face an examiner in a one-on-one bout."

"... that's it?" I asked, surprised. "Man, I thought it was going to be something actually difficult."

The examiner twitched, then a small grin appeared on his face. "We'll see if you're still saying that once we're through with you. Alright, Komaru, he's all yours."

Another ninja showed up then, appearing in that swirl of leaves that marked a _shunshin._ He was a little under six feet tall with short black hair and deeply tanned skin. He was well-muscled but still fairly thin, and he had half a dozen pouches strapped to his body as well as a _tanto _in a horizontal sheath around his waist. He studied me for a moment, then removed his sword and three of the pouches.

"The bare minimum is staying on your feet after two minutes," the new ninja said calmly as he took up a position across from me. "If you can manage that, chances are you'll receive a rating high enough to pass. Avoiding damage, innovative use of techniques, or even managing to hit me will improve your rating. Any questions?"

"Yeah," I said, smirking. "What happens when I beat you?"

I was a little disappointed when he didn't really react. Instead, he just shrugged and said, "Then you definitely pass."

It wasn't much fun trying to rile him up when he was being so matter of fact about it, so I just settled for keeping my smirk up and preparing for the fight.

"Begin!" the examiner shouted.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I called out before darting forward myself. "Army of One," I added a moment later.

The clones connected, knocking my opponent back a few feet and landing some solid hits, but he just shrugged them off. He was ready for me when I closed in, blocking my first punch and countering with a quick jab that passed right through my head. _That _caught him off guard, and I didn't waste any time taking advantage of it. I got in three good hits before he blocked one of them, and I added a kick to the side of his knee that Anko-sensei had shown me before he could take control of the fight again.

He jumped back, staggering slightly, and actually looked at me with surprise. "Not bad, genin," he said, glancing towards the examiner for a moment.

I grinned widely, pointing at him victoriously and declaring, "You should know better than to underestimate Naruto Uzumaki! Beli-"

The attack came out of nowhere, and I didn't know anything was even happening until I saw somebody's shoulder barreling through my torso. I quickly jumped to the side and barely caught the figure I had been pointing at fading away as I saw my opponent recovering from his own attack, his eyes narrowed.

"Don't get distracted in the middle of a fight," he lectured as if he hadn't just completely failed to hit me.

"Or what?" I shot back.

This time a wave of water crashed over me from the side. It still passed through me, but given the size of the attack I had the feeling it had just taken out the rest of my Army of One technique. Crap. I picked Dodge _just _for something like this, too, dammit!

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I called out again, making sure I kept Komaru in my sights this time. I could see the blows I had landed before were taking their toll, but he was far from seriously injured and he'd just taken out my defenses with that last technique.

My clones appeared on all sides and piled onto the examiner, fists and feet flying with abandon as they took any shot they could get. I followed up again, pulling out a kunai and holding it in my left hand. I wasn't just going to survive this, dammit, I was going to _win_!

The examiner was definitely feeling the effects of that one; he was favoring his left side heavily and winced with every movement. Even so, he saw me charging in and fought back, gritting his teeth and shifting his feet rapidly as his hands deflected my punches.

I'd seen this type of move before with Kakashi-sensei though, and this guy was _nowhere _near as good as him. I stepped in closer, placing my own foot where he was about to step and then bringing up my other leg to slam a knee into his stomach. He took the hit hard and fell, landing awkwardly on one side before quickly rolling back up to his feet.

"Time!" I heard from off to the side. I blinked in surprise, then slowly lowered my hands. Had it really been two minutes already? It didn't seem like it had even been one.

Komaru straightened, relaxing out of his stance and bringing one arm up to wrap around his torso. "Damn, kid, you weren't messing around," he said, slightly out of breath. "Should have taken you a little more seriously."

I grinned at him. "Told you I would beat you!"

He chuckled and shook his head. "Don't get ahead of yourself, genin. You did good, but not _that _good." Still laughing to himself, he walked over to the other examiner and they talked for a little bit before they both walked back over to me.

"Alright, here's your evaluation," the first examiner said. "You scored a ten out of ten on defense, a seven out of ten on offense, and a four out of ten on situational awareness. Overall, a seven out of ten, which is a pass."

I was torn between cheering that I had passed and being pissed about that four out of ten. After a few seconds, I settled on pissed.

"_Four_? Why did I get a four? He didn't even hit me once!'

"And you lost track of him twice. If it hadn't been for that technique you were using to avoid damage, you would have taken some serious hits both times. As for your offense, your ninjutsu was very good but your taijutsu could use some work."

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered. "I know." I was getting tired of everything telling me that. I was working on it, dammit!

"Anyway," the first examiner said. "You passed the combat evaluation, so now we head back to the Tower to begin the other parts of your promotion test."

~ Scene Break ~

I followed the examiner through the door and quickly scanned the room. There was another door on the opposite side, a small table in the center of the room with a few items on it, and... nothing else. That was it.

"Your next test," the examiner said before I could ask anything, "concerns preparation and planning. This room is considered your staging area. On the table you will find a selection of items that may or may not assist with the mission you are preparing for. You may take one of the items with you on the mission. Once you have made your selection, pass through the doorway on the other side."

I waited for several seconds, but the examiner didn't say anything else.

"That's it?" I asked. "What kind of test is _that_?"

"As I said, preparation and planning."

"Well, what kind of mission am I supposed to be preparing for?"

"A team has become trapped behind enemy lines. You are to take a small force, sneak into the area without alerting the enemy, and extract our allies."

"Huh. So who are the people I'm taking?"

"For the purposes of this test, assume you have a balanced squad that you have a good working relationship with."

"What about the people I'm rescuing, then?"

"A combat squad."

I scratched my head, wondering what I was supposed to do at this point. I couldn't think of any other questions at the moment, so I wandered over to the table to see what was on it.

There were four items total: a kunai pouch, currently closed; a sealing scroll; a small, wrapped package; and a wooden box.

"And what am I supposed to do with this?" I asked, turning to look at the instructor.

"You may take one of the items with you on the mission," he repeated, then fell silent.

I stifled a groan as I rapidly felt a headache coming on. This was some sort of stupid riddle or something, I could tell. This was really more Shika's kind of thing, not mine. Then again, Shika was a chuunin already and I wasn't, and maybe that was why.

I shook myself and focused on the items again. This was a test, so there had to be a right answer. Not only that, but this was a rescue mission, and I was supposed to avoid enemy ninja. That meant no fighting, so the kunai pouch was out.

Ha! This wasn't so hard after all. I'd just started, and that was one down already!

That left the sealing scroll, the box, and the package. … Crap. How was I supposed to pick one from out of those? I didn't know what was in any of them!

I hesitated for a moment, then reached out and carefully picked up the box. I could see the lid, and it didn't look like it was locked or anything, so maybe I could just take a peek...

"Is that your selection?" the examiner asked before I could open the box.

I startled slightly, then dropped the box back on the table.

"Uh, no," I said, frowning.

"You may take one of the items with you on the mission," the examiner said again.

"Yeah, I got that," I muttered sarcastically.

Dammit. What good was any of this stuff on a rescue mission? I mean, the box wasn't very big, so it wasn't like there was a bunch of stuff in it. The package was pretty small, too, even if I couldn't guess what it was from the shape. The sealing scroll, on the other hand, could hold who knows how much... stuff...

Aha! So _that_ was the trick!

I grinned to myself as I picked up the scroll. Everything on the table was designed to hold something, but the sealing scroll could hold _anything_. When I put it like that, the choice really was obvious.

"Is that your selection?" the examiner asked.

"Yep!"

"Very well. Please proceed to the next room."

I was still grinning as I walked through the door. It wouldn't be long before I was finished with the promotion test and could put on my awesome chuunin vest.

There was another ninja waiting in the next room. He was sitting behind a small table with a stack of papers on one side and a single sheet directly in front of him. The examiner followed me into the room and closed the door behind him before walking over to the other ninja. They talked quietly for a little bit before turning their attention back to me.

"I see that you chose the sealing scroll," the new examiner said. "What was your reasoning?"

"Everything on the table was a container of some sort, but only the sealing scroll could hold anything! It was the most, uh, flexible option," I added.

"I see," he said, making a note on a sheet of paper in front of him. The two examiners talked again, then both nodded. "After evaluating your performance in this test, I'm afraid that you have failed. It is our decision that you will not be promoted to the rank of chuunin at this time."

I stared at them blankly for several seconds, not even registering the words at first. "Failed?" I asked after a moment. "What do you mean, _failed_? That's bullshit! Why? What did I do wrong?"

The examiner held up one hand in a calming gesture. "We will not discuss the particulars of the test with you lest your knowledge corrupt the results of future tests. However, we will repeat that this test emphasized _planning _and _preparation_, and that your choices and reasoning did not reflect the minimum requirements that we feel are needed to advance to the rank of chuunin. We suggest you focus your efforts on those areas before attempting the promotion test again."

"Wait just a-"

They ignored my protests as another ninja came in and dragged me back to the Mission Room. When I got there, Shika, Chouji, Hinata, and Hanabi were all looking at me curiously while Sasuke was nowhere in sight. With all of them looking at me so expectantly, I found I couldn't even look any of them in the eye.

"Well?" Shika asked. "How did it go?"

"... I _failed_," I ground out, staring at the floor.

Hinata gasped softly and Chouji grunted in surprise.

"Troublesome...," Shika sighed, rubbing his hands over his face. "Did they tell you why?"

"Some crap about planning and preparation or something. It was a stupid test anyway," I growled. I perked up as an idea occurred to me. "Promotion test, Naruto Uzumaki."

**Naruto Uzumaki is currently not eligible for promotion. Naruto Uzumaki must complete – five missions of C-rank or above – before he can take the promotion test.**

"... dammit," I sighed. I wasn't as surprised as I should have been – I guess I was getting used to this kind of thing by now.

I slumped against the wall, dropping into a crouch as I glared at the mission desk. Sasuke still wasn't back, so either he hadn't even gotten past the combat part yet, or he was doing better than I had.

"Are you ok, N-Naruto-kun?" Hinata asked softly as she stopped next to me.

I looked up at her and sighed before nodding. "Yeah, I guess. It just really sucks that I failed, you know? Kinda thought I'd gotten all of that out of my system back in the Academy," I laughed, shaking my head.

"Don't w-worry, Naruto-kun," Hinata said, kneeling next to me and placing one hand on my shoulder. I grew a little concerned when I felt her hand shaking, but she continued speaking before I could say anything about it. "I'm sure you'll get it next time. You passed the Academy in the end, after all, and I know you're a really great ninja."

I stared at her for a moment, stunned at how firmly she'd said that. Then I jumped to my feet, a wide grin on my face as I pulled her up by her hand.

"You're right, Hinata-chan!" I said, still grinning. "It's just five more missions, then I can take the test again and kick its ass! I'll show those stupid chuunin just who they're messing with!"

I expected her to agree, or at least say something, but she didn't. Instead she seemed to be staring at something, her face slowly getting redder. I glanced down and saw she was staring at my hand, which was still holding hers from where I'd pulled her up.

"Oh, sorry," I said uncomfortably, letting go. Her hand remained in place for a moment, then she slowly pulled it back.

"No problem..." she said, sounding a little out of it.

She didn't seem to be angry or anything, but she was still acting kinda weird... before I could ask her about it, though, I saw Sasuke strolling into the Mission Room, carrying a scroll in one hand and wearing a flak vest.

A _chuunin_ flak vest.

**Congratulations! Sasuke Uchiha has been promoted to Chuunin!**

**A Special Mission is now available in the Mission Room.**

Bastard.

"Guess you passed, huh, _teme_?" I called out, stifling my annoyance. So what if he managed to pass this time? I still showed him up in the Chuunin Exams! Twice!

"Yeah," he said shortly, a frown on his face.

"Congratulations, Sasuke," Shika called out, followed shortly by the others. I added my own into the mix, doing my best not to scowl at him.

"Hn," he said, not looking at all happy about it.

"What's your problem?" I snapped. "You got promoted, didn't you? It wouldn't kill you to be happy about it, you know!"

He looked over at me, blinking for a moment before he took a closer look at me. "You didn't make it, huh?" he said.

"No, I didn't," I ground out. I just knew he was going to make some smartass remark about it, any second now.

"Hn," was all he said, however.

"What's the scroll for?" Shika asked after a moment.

"My evaluation," Sasuke said, looking down at it. "Apparently I barely scraped by."

"Really?" I asked, bounding over. I snatched the scroll out of his hand and unrolled it before he could stop me.

_Sasuke Uchiha – Chuunin Promotion Test Results_

_Combat: Offense – 6; Defense – 5; Awareness – 7; Overall – 6; PASS_

_Preparation and Planning: Category II; 7/10; PASS_

_Mission Simulation: Mission Aborted; Zero Casualties; 6/10; PASS_

I smirked when I saw that I had done better than Sasuke on the combat portion, but scowled at the rest.

"Which one did you take for the planning test?"

He grabbed the scroll back before shooting me an odd look.

"Which one what?"

"Which item did you pick?" I asked again. "I took the sealing scroll, but apparently that was the wrong one."

"We must have had different tests," he said after a few seconds. "They gave me five minutes to come up with team profiles for a set of missions. I still don't know what the hell the category two thing is supposed to mean."

"Dammit," I groaned. So much for getting more information on that test.

He scowled then, glaring down at the scroll. "I thought I'd failed when the mission we were simulating went to hell, but they said I made the right call under the circumstances, even if it was possible to actually succeed."

"Either way," Chibi said, butting in, "this means we've got two chuunin now, so we don't have to do D-ranks anymore! Thank _Kami_!" she added dramatically.

"I'm more concerned about the special mission," Shika added, glancing towards me. "This is the first time it's said that one is _available_, as opposed to just unlocked."

"Huh. Good point," I said. "Missions."

**Available Missions:**

**Catch Tora! – Retrieve Madam Shijimi's cat. Rank: D Reward: 100 ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**Paint It... Blue? – Paint the client's house. Rank: D Reward: 50+ ryo Length: Up to one day.**

**The Kidnapping – A merchant's son is being held for random. Eliminate the kidnappers and return the son safely. Rank: C Reward: 800 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

**Missing-nin: Akira Kurosawa – A missing-nin has been sighted within the Land of Fire. Eliminate them. Rank: C Reward: 1000 ryo Length: Up to one week.**

**Special Mission: The Snake's Tail – Jiraiya has uncovered a plot by Orochimaru to kidnap Sasuke Uchiha from Konoha, and he plans to turn it into a trap. Rank: ? Reward: ? Length: ?**

We all turned to look at Sasuke, who was staring back at us, wide-eyed and pale.

~ Scene Break ~

"What happens if we _don't _take it?" Chouji cut in, interrupting Sasuke's rant about how the mission was a terrible idea and there was no way in hell he was going to play bait for _any _plan the old pervert came up with.

"Then we don't give Orochimaru an easy opportunity to kidnap Sasuke. Since I doubt he'll give up easily, that just means he'll strike at a time and place of his choosing rather than ours," Shika replied.

"W-what if the plan fails?" Hinata asked.

"Exactly!" Sasuke called out, pointing at Hinata triumphantly. "I'm not going to let them just hand me over like that! There's no way that snake freak is doing this just for the hell of it. He's probably going to harvest my eyes or something!"

"Most likely," Shika agreed. "However, should the plan fail we do have one other option."

The room fell silent for a moment, everyone trying to figure out what he meant.

"Oh, you mean the checkpoint!" I blurted. After a moment, I frowned. "But it's been a long time since we had one, hasn't it?"

"Not since just before that poker game with the Hokage," Shika confirmed, nodding. "Still, should things turn out for the worst we can always recover."

That seemed to stop Sasuke in his tracks.

"What's the point of doing the mission, though?" Chibi asked, filling the silence. "I mean, we'll capture or take out whoever is sent to kidnap him, right? How is that such a big deal?"

"Other than the obvious benefit of taking out ninja loyal to Orochimaru, I'm not sure. I would guess that Jiraiya is planning to interrogate whoever he sends to kidnap Sasuke."

"What happens when we go to a checkpoint? I don't remember doing that before," Sasuke asked then.

Shika glanced over at me. "I'm not sure, actually. Naruto is the only one who has experienced that."

"Oh, well," I stuttered for a moment. "Well, if it's like dying, then you just wake up right back where you were when the Checkpoint happened. Every time so far I woke up at Ichiraku's the night before team selections."

"So, if we went back to the one before the poker game, we'd just be standing in the middle of the road in Tanzaku Gai?"

"Pretty much," I said, shrugging.

"But you haven't actually tested it."

"Well, no. I haven't had a reason to do that... not since I found out I couldn't go back to before the exams."

"Look at it this way," Chouji said slowly, shifting in his seat. "We know that Orochimaru is trying to kidnap you now. You can either take the mission and walk into the kidnapping attempt with your eyes open, or you can constantly look over your shoulder wondering when it will happen. You could be all alone when it happens, or injured, or who knows what.

"If you do it now, you'll have all of us there to back you up."

I nodded in agreement, as did everyone else. Sasuke looked around the room for a moment, then his shoulders slumped.

"And you're _sure_ you can go back to the checkpoint if it goes badly?" he pressed, turning to stare at me.

"Absolutely."

"... Fine. I'll do it."

~ Scene Break ~

"I still say this is a bad idea," Tsunade grumbled, glaring at Jiraiya.

"And I say that we could deal a huge blow to the snake bastard if we succeed in capturing whoever he sends. You know how badly he wants the Sharingan, so chances are he's not going to send just anybody. It'll be someone he trusts – as much as he trusts anyone, anyway. Even if we end up killing them, it's still going to hurt him."

Tsunade waved him off, sighing. "I know, pervert. I know." She turned her attention back to us, though she was really focused on Sasuke. When we had taken the mission, we were told that Sasuke was required and that only two other people could join him. Another team would be operating in the area as support, but that was all.

We'd eventually settled on Hinata and me as Sasuke's team, as much as it pissed me off to have him as the team leader. I was there to keep whoever the ninja were tied up while Sasuke and Hinata took them down and Hinata would also give us a heads-up with her Byakugan as well as using her First Aid if things went bad – and her newly acquired Resuscitate ability if things _really _went bad.

"Alright, here's the deal," Tsunade declared, pulling everyone's attention to her. "Sasuke will be leading a team on his 'first mission' as a chuunin. He'll be relatively close to Konoha, but also operating without Kakashi as backup and thus supposedly as vulnerable as he's likely to get. Jiraiya's going to leak the information into Orochimaru's spy network and let us know if and when the snake bites on it.

"While you three are wandering around looking as helpless as you can manage, we'll have two strike teams shadowing you at a distance, ready to step in and take out whoever Orochimaru sends.

"That said, this mission is not without its risks. You three will be on your own for anywhere from thirty seconds to five minutes, depending on the situation." Her face hardened. "Under _no circumstances _are you to allow yourselves to be captured. If things look to be even remotely out of our control, you are to abort the mission immediately and head straight back to Konoha. Do I make myself clear?"

All three of us nodded quickly, noting the fierce expression on Tsunade's face.

"Good. If everything goes as planned, you won't even make contact with Orochimaru's forces. If you _do_ encounter them and can engage without undue risk, do so. Don't forget, our goal is to capture, not kill. The more information we have on Orochimaru, the better off we are."

She finally leaned back in her chair and focused her gaze on Sasuke. "This mission is strictly voluntary, Sasuke. If you aren't comfortable with the risks that this mission entails, say so now and we will make other arrangements. This may be our _best _option to lure them into a trap, but it's not our only one."

For someone who had been ready to decline the mission on the spot earlier, Sasuke certainly looked confident as he replied, "I am aware of the risks, Hokage-sama, and also the potential rewards. I am ready to accept the mission."

Tsunade stared at him for a long moment, her face carefully blank, then nodded.

"Very well. The mission is approved."

**Checkpoint "The Snake's Tail" Reached!**

~ End Chapter ~

**A/N: No new challenges this time. I plan to start posting some of those as Omakes, though I haven't decided if I'm going to do it as part of this story or a separate one. Either way, I'm most of the way finished with the first one.**

**Thanks to everyone who has pointed out errors in the posted character sheets or the Manual. I try to keep everything accurate but some things still slip past me. I plan to have Hinata's character sheet up later today, and Hanabi and Chouji's later this week. Other than that, hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**


	11. Life Five: Ninja Odyssey

"Still nothing?" Sasuke asked impatiently.

Hinata activated her Byakugan briefly, then shook her head. "No," she answered. "The other teams are still keeping their distance. No sign of any enemy ninja."

I sighed and grumbled to myself. We'd been out here for two days already, and I'd honestly expected something would have happened by now. Instead it'd been just like any other mission, except for the constant tension flowing through all of us as we constantly prepared for an attack from Orochimaru's ninja as they tried to kidnap Sasuke.

"Well..." Sasuke said after a few seconds, frowning to himself. "We'll just keep going, then. Not much else we can do. The other teams will let us know if they manage to intercept the attack. If everything goes right we won't see combat at all, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah," I said, waving him off and turning back to Hinata. "So what has Kurenai-sensei had you guys working on? We've had so many missions lately I can't even remember the last time we actually had an actual team meeting with Kakashi-sensei, and Sakura's been stuck recovering with her mom hovering over her."

"O-oh, um," Hinata said hesitantly, pushing her fingers together for a moment. "Well, we're still focused on teamwork m-most of the time, but she's started introducing us to more complex genjutsu techniques now."

"Awesome!" I grinned. "Kakashi-sensei's always going on about teamwork too, but he doesn't do anything with genjutsu. What has she taught you?"

"W-well, she showed Shino how to make it seem like his bugs were appearing from nowhere to help him mask their approach, and she has Kiba refining his man-beast technique with Akamaru so that it's even harder to see through."

"What about you?" I pressed. The only new technique I'd gotten from Kakashi-sensei was that kage bunshin variation with the kunai - which totally kicked ass, yeah, but it was still just the one technique. And some work on my taijutsu, I guess. It sounded like Kurenai-sensei was doing a lot more than that.

"She's teaching me, um, the demonic tree technique."

"That sounds kick ass!" I said. "What does it do?"

Hinata ducked her head and pushed her fingers together again. "I-it makes the target think they've gotten wrapped up by roots and branches, locking them in place and making them panic. If it works, it'd be very easy for anyone on my team to land their attacks afterward."

"Cool! What about-" I cut off abruptly as all of us froze, feeling a large flare of chakra in the distance. Hinata immediately activated her Byakugan, the veins around her eyes bulging and giving her generally calm and gentle expression a fierce cast. Her eyes widened even further as she let out a gasp. "Incoming!" she snapped quickly. "Four ninja wearing Sound headbands from the south, and two more engaging the strike teams."

Sasuke shifted to face that direction, dropping into a stance and pulling out a pair of kunai. "Stick to the plan," he called out firmly.

"Got it!" I replied, bringing my heads up in front of me. "Kage bunshin!" I called out, filling the clearing around us with puffs of smoke. I'd made roughly twenty clones, and they all quickly spread out, some hiding around the clearing and others darting to the east and west, preparing to circle around and hit the Sound ninja from behind. Hinata leapt into the trees above Sasuke's position, her Byakugan still activated and leaving a normal bunshin behind.

We heard the group of Sound ninja plowing through my clones, their shouts and insults floating through the air back to us before they were dispelled. Once the group finally made it close enough to be visible, they'd already taken a few hits and wasted a bit of chakra.

The first one into the clearing reminded me of Chouji, though he was taller and more of his bulk seemed to be made up of muscle than fat. He looked like he'd taken the most damage, with several cuts on his arms and a long rip along the side of his shirt. Shortly behind him were a thin, gray-haired teen and a black-haired teen who -

"What the fuck? Why do you have six arms?" I shouted, shocked.

"So I can beat your face in!" the ninja in question shot back, flipping me off... six times. "That one's mine," he called out, scowling.

"Don't forget the plan, Kidomaru," the gray-haired one reminded him. "We don't have time to fuck around."

"Shut up, Sakon," Kidomaru replied.

"Guys..." the larger ninja said slowly, "we shouldn't be fighting right now..."

"You shut up too, Jirobo!" Kidomaru growled. "Just do your job and keep the Uchiha busy until we take care of his team."

"Fine," Jirobo grumbled, turning back to face his target only to find Sasuke already in his face, kunai flashing out. His head jerked to the side, barely avoiding the blade that would have pierced his skull and instead taking a long gash along his jaw.

I didn't have time to follow that fight as I charged towards my own target, activating Army of One and sending a Bunshin Barrage towards the gray-haired one as I did so. I quickly found out that trying to go hand-to-hand with someone who had six was... different, to say the least. He tried to pull the same kind of thing Anko-sensei did, catching my fists and holding on as he launched his own attacks, but he quickly found that he couldn't actually make contact with me. The expression on his face as his hands passed through my body like it wasn't even there was priceless. He quickly let go and fell back, taking a more defensive approach as he tried to figure out what was going on. I didn't have time to press my advantage, though, as the gray-haired one, Sakon, came up behind me, trying to stab me with a kunai and having just as much success as Kidomaru had.

I caught a glimpse of Sasuke wailing away on the big guy, his eyes sharp and that damn smirk on his face - it wasn't nearly as annoying when it was directed at somebody else, though.

A group of my clones came up behind Kidomaru, blind-siding him and landing some powerful hits that I heard clearly through the chaotic melee. Sure that he would be occupied for a little while at least, I focused back on Sakon again, hoping to knock him out quickly so I would only have to fight one opponent at a time.

Come to think of it, where was Hinata in all of this? Her bunshin had disappeared at some point, but there was no sign of the real one anywhere. Hadn't she also said there were four ninja coming for us? Maybe she was taking care of that one, then; it was the only thing that made sense.

"Asshole," Sakon growled, wiping some blood away from his busted lip. "Think your stupid ass technique is going to save you, you trash?" He glanced over at Sasuke's fight, a frown flitting across his face. "Jirobo!" he snapped suddenly. "Stop fucking around!"

Jirobo hesitated for a moment, allowing Sasuke an opening to land a spinning kick and slam him backwards into a tree. I took advantage of Sakon's distraction too, yelling out, "Kage Bunshin Barrage!"

Sakon's gaze snapped back to me just in time for his feet to get yanked out from under him. He flipped into the air, bouncing back and forth as a series of clones landed hits that kept him airborne. I began running forward to where it looked like the last clone would send him, only to stumble to a halt when a long stream of golden thread flew past me, sticking to the trees and grass around me and hanging suspended in the air, forming a barrier.

I whipped around to find Kidomaru closing in again. I pulled out a kunai, deciding to focus on taking out some of his hands only to find that his punches were connecting now. Whatever that stuff was apparently used up the rest of Army of One. I stumbled backwards at the unexpected hits, though I still managed to slash at one of his hands and land a nasty cut across the back of it.

"You assholes should have known better than to mess with Konoha," I called out mockingly as I recovered. "Now you get to enjoy an ass kicking delivered by yours truly!"

"Fucking trash," Kidomaru smirked. "Whatever you were doing isn't working anymore. We'll see just how long you last now, won't we?"

A loud boom drew both of our eyes to the side, where a cloud of dust was billowing up from the ground. I looked over just in time to see Sasuke jumping backwards, a pained expression on his face as he clutched at his shoulder. Jirobo followed him out of the smoke, only the Sound ninja's body was covered in some sort of black markings and he seemed to be moving a lot faster than before.

"Fucking trash," Kidomaru spat again, "making us use this."

"Wha-" I started to ask, only to see more black marks flowing across my opponent's skin as well as he crouched. If this was anything like what the big guy had done, Kidomaru was about to get a lot stronger and faster.

"Plan B!" Sasuke yelled out.

My hand blurred as I pulled out a kunai, but I hesitated before I actually threw it. I still had no idea where Hinata had gotten to, and I didn't want to risk hitting her. I needed to end this quickly, though, since Plan B called for killing everyone except Sasuke's opponent; he would have only done that if he felt we couldn't hold out long enough for reinforcements while trying to keep all of them alive and reasonably uninjured.

I could see Kidomaru straightening, most of his skin covered with those black marks. He was doing something with his hands, spewing forth more of that golden stuff and shaping it into something. Dammit, I needed to do something fast, but melee wasn't going to cut it with this guy. I needed to find some way to make sure I didn't hit anything behind-

My eyes widened in realization before I took off running, angling away from Kidomaru. He turned to follow me, his hands almost a blur as they continued to craft that golden stuff into some sort of long object. I leapt high into the air, landing against the side of a tree and using it as a springboard to leap even higher, putting me directly above my opponent.

He smirked, raising the object he had been making and revealing it to be a large bow. He already had an arrow notched and pulled it back, his arms bulging with the effort. I raised my kunai in response, my arm whipping forward as I threw the kunai as hard I could straight down.

"Idiot," Kidomaru snorted as he loosed his arrow.

"Kunai Kage Bunshin!" I declared as I finished the string of hand-signs. My vision was cut off suddenly as my single kunai was suddenly replicated into dozens, hundreds of identical blades. They slammed into the ground, the thunk of metal sinking into wood and dirt filling the air and drowning out all other sound. The golden arrow fell behind them, its flight slowed and knocked off course by the multitude of kunai that had impacted it. The mass of kunai dispelled a moment later, revealing the bloody stain on the ground that was what was left of my opponent.

My head snapped to the side as I recognized the sharp, crackling sound that reminded me of an entire flock of birds chirping all at once. I looked over just in time to see Sasuke shoving his hand through Sakon, who had somehow managed to grow an extra pair of arms himself. Man, what was with these Sound guys and extra limbs?

Hinata rejoined us at that point. She had one arm hanging limply at her side and several bloodstains on her shirt and pants, but she also had a wide grin on her face.

"Give up now," Sasuke called out, looking over to the only remaining Sound-nin. "Your teammates are dead, and you can't possibly hope to beat all of us at once."

Jirobo looked around, his eyes lingering on the body near Sasuke's feet and the remains of Kidomaru before turning to examine Hinata. "Sakon... Ukon... Kidomaru... Tayuya..." he said slowly, his voice mournful.

Ukon? Tayuya? Who the hell was that? I looked around again, but still only saw three other ninja. Had Hinata taken out two at once?

"You... you..." Jirobo growled, the black marks on his skin writhing and growing to cover even more of his body. "You bastards!" he screamed.

The black marks covered his entire body before fading to a dull red and his sparse hair suddenly lengthened, turning blond as it spilled down his back. "I'll kill you!" he growled, launching himself towards Sasuke.

"We can't have that," a sly voice called out. Jirobo suddenly gasped, his skin reverting to its normal hue and the black lines retreating entirely. He collapsed to the ground, panting and groaning in pain.

I turned to face the one who had spoken. I recognized the voice, but I hadn't expected to hear it in this kind of situation.

"Kabuto?" I asked. "Were you part of the teams the Hokage assigned?"

The gray-haired genin, still wearing his normal outfit of purple shirt and black pants turned to look at me, surprise on his face. "Oh? If it isn't little Naruto-kun. It's been a while since the Chuunin Exams, hasn't it?"

"Naruto-kun," Hinata hissed quietly.

"Yeah, it has!" I called back, smiling. "Man, I didn't know you could kick ass like that. You took out that guy like it was nothing!"

"Naruto," Hinata hissed again, louder this time. I glanced over at her, wondering why she looked so worried.

"Kabuto helped us out during the exams, don't you remember?" I asked her. "He was the guy who had those cards with all the information on them."

"Well, I couldn't let him kill all of you, now could I?" Kabuto called back, laughing. "We need Sasuke alive for Orochimaru-sama, after all."

"Naruto-kun," Hinata said fiercely, "he's wearing a Sound headband!"

I felt a sick feeling settle into my gut as I turned back to look. It was hard to tell from this distance, but now that I was really paying attention the symbol on his headband wasn't quite the right shape for Konoha.

"For... Orochimaru?" I repeated dully.

"Oh? You mean you really didn't know?" Kabuto called back, smirking as he adjusted his glasses. "I did have a little showdown with your teacher, after all. I'm surprised he didn't say anything." He laughed then, shaking his head. "On the other hand, what would be the point of telling a useless ninja like yourself, anyway?"

"You... you traitor!" I yelled, taking a step forward. "Why would you betray the village for someone like Orochimaru?"

Kabuto just shook his head sadly. "Tsk, tsk, Naruto-kun, your education is sorely lacking. To betray something, you have to be loyal to it in the first place. There was never a single moment where I though of that stupid little hovel as my village."

My fists clenched. "We'll see if you can still say that after I beat you and drag your ass back to the village," I told him.

Kabuto adjusted his glasses again. "As fun as this little reunion is," he said with infuriating calm, "I really must be going." He looked over to Sasuke. "Say goodbye to your friends, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke took a step forward, raising a kunai. "I'm not going any-" he began, but was cut off by Hinata's gasp.

I whirled to face her, only to see her whipping around to defend against a blur that was coming out of the woods behind her. I'd barely made it two steps towards her before it was over.

Her opponent was dressed in the same kind of clothing as the other Sound ninja; a gray shirt that hung down towards his knees, black pants, and a large, rope-like belt that was tied into a bow in the back. His form was covered in blood, but his expression was calm, almost blank. He had one hand extended, holding some kind of white blade that he'd just stabbed Hinata with.

The blade had gone all the way through her and was sticking out of her back, and I could see the bloodstains slowly spreading on her shirt. Her good hand reached toward him, the blue glow that indicated the use of her family's taijutsu style fading rapidly, and then her arm dropped as her entire body slumped.

I heard an odd sort of ringing in my ears, that only grew stronger when the new enemy withdrew the blade and stepped past Hinata's slumping body, not even sparing her a second glance.

"Bye bye, Hinata-chan!" Kabuto called out, waving and smiling. "Hope you liked meeting Kimimaro-kun!"

_My body let out a bestial roar as it launched forward, hands extended into claws and a snarl on its face. I almost welcomed the abrupt shift in my perceptions, but I was unable to tear my eyes away from Hinata's body. There was a pool of blood around her now, and it just kept growing and growing like it was never going to stop._

_"Hinata! Naruto!" Sasuke yelled, and I glanced over to see him trying to get past Kabuto, his fists and feet flying wildly and his Sharingan whirling._

_My body was still swiping at Kimimaro, but he'd produced a strange, spiked whip from somewhere and was whipping it through the air, the end of the weapon leaving bloody gashes along my body as it pushed forward. The situation continued like that for a few seconds, Sasuke and Kabuto trading attacks, my berserk body spilling the Kyuubi's tainted chakra into the air as it threw itself at Kimimaro again and again, and Hinata's blood staining the ground darker and darker._

_Finally, apparently tired of using his whip to take my body apart, he thrust out his hand and that white blade appeared, emerging out of his own body to stab through my chest just like it had through Hinata's._

I looked up, staring into Kimimaro's pitiless expression and smiled grimly. "I'm..." I choked out as blackness started seeping in at the edges of my vision. "I'm going to... kill you," I promised him.

His eyes narrowed for a moment before he withdrew his blade and stepped past me.

"Naruto!" I heard Sasuke scream again, but it was distant and quickly fading.

~ Scene Break ~

I blinked.

Then I blinked again, taking in the oddly... dim surroundings.

In the distance, hanging in midair like some sort of strange photograph, I could see Sasuke pitched over Jirobo's shoulder, his arms and legs bound tightly and a look of absolute fury and loathing on his face as he looked up at a smirking Kabuto and an expressionless Kimimaro.

**Following the death of his teammates Hinata Hyuuga and Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha was successfully captured by Orochimaru's forces. The loss of the Sharingan to the Snake Sannin proved to be a critical factor in the conflicts to come, but it was the loss of the Kyuubi jinchuuriki that ultimately led to the downfall of Konoha.**

**You have failed.**

"Wh-what?" I called out, stunned. I'd never seen anything like this before, but it was what I just heard that left me reeling. That Orochimaru bastard getting his hands on Sasuke's Sharingan was bad enough, but Konoha itself was... because I died?

"That's bullshit! There's no way Konoha would fall!"

**Do you wish to restart at a checkpoint?**

"Of course I do!" I yelled out. "No way I'm going to give up now, you dumbass!"

**Please choose a checkpoint: **

**Chuunin Exams Victory**

**Know When To Fold 'Em**

**The Snake's Tail**

"Well... huh," I muttered, scratching my head as my anger faded just as quickly as it had come. I actually got to choose this time, apparently. "The Snake's Tail," I said after a moment.

~Scene Break~

"You won't touch him!" Hinata spat, lunging forward and driving her hand into and through the door in front of her.

"When I get free I'm going to shove a Chidori so far up your-" Sasuke snarled, raising one hand. Electricity was already starting to spark around it, and the sharp chirping filled the office.

"_What the hell is going on here_?" Tsunade barked, her killing intent flooding the office and driving us all to our knees. She shot to her feet and slammed her hands on her desk. "I said _dismissed_, not tear up my office!"

"Wh- how- I- I..." Hinata stuttered, her eyes widening. She jerked her hand out of the door, staring at it, Her breathing grew fast and shallow as she clutched at her chest with her other hand.

Sasuke lowered his hand as he stumbled to his feet, turning to look at me and Hinata. His eyes were slightly wild and I could see his Sharingan whirling in their sockets as he studied us.

"Alive," he said after a moment, his voice rough. He shut his eyes tightly, his hands coming up to clutch at his temples as his shoulders sagged. He drew in a shuddering breath and shook himself, then lowered his heads and fixed his gaze on me. "Checkpoint?" he asked roughly after clearing his throat.

"Uh, yeah," I muttered. I looked over at Hinata, growing concerned. Her eyes were still wide and it looked like she wasn't even seeing her own hand any more. Her breath was wheezing in and out of her lungs, so rapidly that there was almost no time between her drawing in a gulp of air and pushing it back out as a low gasp.

I stepped over to her slowly and knelt beside her, raising my hands in the air as I tried to catch her attention. "Hinata," I said slowly.

She jerked suddenly, her head snapping around to face me. Her eyes widened even further and the veins bulged as she activated her Byakugan.

"Hinata, it's alright. Everything's fine now," I assured her.

She raised one trembling hand up and slowly reached out to lay it against my chest. "Real," she whispered, her breathing beginning to even out. "But I- I was-"

I grimaced and nodded. "Yes," I admitted. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you," I told her. "It happened so fast and you were just..."

"N-no, I was- I should have seen him," she said, whipping her head from side to side. "I shouldn't have gotten distracted. I should have-"

"As amusing as this is," Tsunade said dryly, interrupting whatever Hinata was going to say, "I just gave you a mission - against my better judgment, I might add. Unless customs have changed significantly, this is the point where you go and do the mission."

I looked over at the new Hokage, mouth opening to inform her of just what it was we had survived - or rather, hadn't survived - but then shook my head. I'd already seen where that led, and she either wouldn't believe me or forget about it before we got out the door. I turned back to Hinata to see that she'd stopped breathing entirely, her eyes focused on the hand she had laid against my chest and her face glowing bright red.

"Hey, Hinata," I said, waving my hand in front of her face.

No reaction.

"Hinata, you ok? Hinata?"

Sasuke walked over and grabbed Hinata's wrist, pulling her to her feet and leading her out of the door. "Come on, _dobe_," he muttered. "Let's get out of here before we make the Hokage any more upset."

"The cost for replacing the door is coming out of your mission pay, by the way," Tsunade called out tauntingly, her voice following us as we finally left her office.

~ Scene Break ~

We'd barely made it out of the Hokage's Tower before the others came running up to us. Shika looked worried, Chouji seemed confused, and Hanabi just looked annoyed.

"What happened?" Shika asked bluntly.

I laughed nervously, reaching up to rub the back of my head. "It, uh... didn't go so well."

Sasuke snorted, shaking his head. "That's an understatement," he muttered.

"Did you use a checkpoint?" Shika pressed. "One minute we were trying to catch that troublesome cat again and the next I was back at my house playing shogi."

"Yeah," I said, "I did."

Shika nodded, his eyes flickering as his expression grew thoughtful. "So we all remember everything that happened up to that point, but the transition itself happens without warning..." he mused. "Why did you end up using the checkpoint?" he asked then.

I shifted uncomfortably, looking over at Hinata and Sasuke. Hinata was ducking her head and pressing her fingers together again, her face still looking red; I wasn't even certain she'd heard anything we'd been talking about. Sasuke, on the other hand, was scowling and looked like he wanted to punch somebody.

"We, uh, lost," I admitted.

"You died," Sasuke growled, his fist clenched. "After that, they surrounded me and took me prisoner, bragging about how Orochimaru would be thrilled to finally get his hands on the Sharingan." The group fell silent at that, and even Hinata finally looked up, her face pale.

"Something was different, though," I spoke up after a moment. "Always before I just woke up back at Ichiraku's, but not this time. There was some sort of weird picture thing that showed Sasuke getting carried off by the big guy, and then more of those words showed up."

"What did they say?" Shika asked intently, leaning forward.

"They said, uh," I frowned, trying to remember the exact wording. "They said that Sasuke got captured 'cause me and Hinata-chan died, and that Orochimaru getting his hands on the Sharingan was a big deal. They also said that, uh, Konoha would... would fall because I was dead."

"Did it say why?" Shika asked softly, breaking the tense silence that had fallen over the group. Hanabi was looking back and forth between me and Hinata, her eyes wide. Chouji was frowning darkly, an unusually fierce expression on his normally calm face, and Shika... Shika's eyes were gleaming and he looked more awake than I'd ever seen him.

"Yeah. It's because of the, uh, other thing," I finished lamely, trying to figure out how to tell him without giving everything away to the rest of the group.

His eyes narrowed for a moment, then flicked down to my stomach before looking back up at me again. I nodded, relieved that he'd figured out what I was trying to say.

"What other thing?" Sasuke asked, frowning.

"You know how Naruto keeps going berserk whenever one of us is incapacitated?" Shika asked.

"Hey, Shika," I said quickly, starting to panic, "what are you-"

"It could be a new bloodline," he continued calmly. "He can't really control it right now, but given time it could prove to be very powerful; powerful enough to tip the scales in the future. We don't want it spread around or anything, since enemies could start targeting him if they suspect he might be a serious threat in the future."

Sasuke was still frowning, but nodded slowly in acceptance. Chouji shrugged as if it didn't really concern him, and Hinata and Hanabi were staring at me wide-eyed.

"Konoha hasn't gotten a new bloodline in decades," Hanabi pointed out thoughtfully. "If you can prove it, you'd be able to get some serious benefits. The Hyuuga get a lot of perks and advantages because of our bloodline, after all, and if yours is as powerful as you say then you could probably qualify for the same treatment." She smirked. "Father would probably help you with that, if you asked the right way."

"That's not something to worry about right now," Shika interrupted before I could come up with a reply. He turned back to me. "Was there anything else that happened?"

I thought for a minute, then shrugged. "I could pick any checkpoint to go back to, but that was it. As soon as I picked The Snake's Tail we were back in the Hokage's office."

He nodded slowly, then dropped into a crouch as he closed his eyes and brought his hands up to form a circle. I'd seen him do this a couple of times already, although it still looked really weird, and Chouji didn't even bat an eye. The others, though...

"What's he doing?" Hanabi asked after a moment, staring at Shika.

"That's his thinking pose," Chouji supplied. "It helps him concentrate."

"He has a pose just for thinking?" Hanabi asked in disbelief.

Chouji shrugged. "It works."

Shika's eyes snapped open and focused on me. "You said that whenever you died you woke up back at Ichiraku's, right?"

"Yeah?" I said, wondering where he was going with this.

"And this time you woke up looking at that picture of Sasuke getting captured, and then the words showed up, right?"

I nodded and he turned to Sasuke. "Why do you remember that?"

None of us quite got where he was going with that, judging by the expressions on everybody's faces.

"Why do I remember what?" Sasuke asked.

"Why do you remember getting captured? Always before everything ended as soon as Naruto died, but this time he died before you were captured. Yet, you still remember it."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed. "Because I was still free, maybe?" he asked slowly, obviously starting to think about it himself.

Shika shook his head. "That doesn't make sense either. None of the rest of us were in any danger, and Konoha likely would have mounted a rescue mission for you in short order. And yet, it stopped as soon as the whole team was taken out or captured, not when Naruto himself fell."

"W-what about my ab-ability?" Hinata asked quietly. "Re-resuscitate can bring someone back after they d-died."

Shika nodded slowly. "But you were already down by that point, so you couldn't have used it, and Sasuke doesn't have it." He sighed and shook his head. "There has to be something else to it."

"Another way?" Chouji commented, scratching his cheek.

Shika's eyes lit up. "If that's the case then... yes, it fits! No one was around to do it before Naruto recruited us, and once Sasuke was captured he couldn't do it either. There must be some sort of time or distance limit to it as well, otherwise the three of us still in Konoha could have theoretically done it."

My head was spinning as I followed Shika's train of thought. "Ok, fine, so we can revive people with more than just that Resussi-thingy. That would be really useful if Hinata ever... if that happens again, but how?"

"I... don't know," Shika admitted, frowning.

Sasuke nodded. "Keep thinking about it. In the meantime, we need to head out for our mission."

"Are you guys going to be alright? Do you need backup?"

Sasuke shook his head, scowling. "No. We aren't going to screw around with them this time. We'll take care of the first group quickly to focus on Kabuto and that Kimimaro."

Shika nodded slowly, then froze. "Wait, what? Kabuto? That guy from the exams?"

~ Scene Break ~

We spent a little while explaining everything we could recall about Kabuto's involvement, which really didn't add up to much. Shika promised to look into it from within Konoha to see if there was anything more to it, then we set out once again.

We refined Sasuke's plan a little as we traveled, deciding that we should attempt to link up with the support teams as soon as possible and help them take care of Kabuto and Kimimaro. Hinata wasn't certain what had happened to them the first time, but it was likely that they had been killed. With our new plan in mind, we were ready when the Sound ninja showed up again on the second day.

"They're here, from the south again," Hinata called out.

"You're up, Naruto," Sasuke said, nodding to me.

I nodded back solemnly before creating a few clones and tossing a kunai to each. They spread out, moving through the trees around me as I darted towards the incoming enemy ninja, Sasuke and Hinata keeping pace a few steps behind me. The Sound team stopped short when they saw us, glancing around warily and spreading out slightly as they prepared for combat.

"Looks like the trash came out to play," Kidomaru sneered.

I raised the kunai I had in my hand, preparing to throw.

"What the fuck are you going to do with that, shithead?" the red-headed girl called out. "You throw that and I'm going to shove it right back up your-"

"Now!" I yelled, launching the kunai forward and speeding through the hand-seals for the Kunai Kage Bunshin technique. All around the clearing more kunai appeared as my clones copied my movements, and a moment later the air was filled with the screech of metal striking metal and the smoke of dispersing clones.

When the noise finally died down and the last of the shadow kunai were gone, very little remained of the Sound team.

"Let's go," Sasuke said quickly, leaping back into the trees and following Hinata's directions towards the Konoha teams that were fighting a losing battle against Kabuto and Kimimaro.

~ Scene Break ~

I burst out of the trees, doing my best to ignore the three ninja who were lying on the ground unmoving as I darted towards Kabuto. He was occupied with the last remaining ninja as he used short blue blades of chakra emitted from his fingers to cut through the ninja's kunai and flesh. He whirled around, one hand driving towards my chest as I leapt at him.

He was shocked when his blades passed right through me, and even more shocked when I slammed a kunai into his chest. My aim must have been a little off, though, because the blade glanced off to the side, leaving a long cut along his shoulder but not doing nearly as much damage as I had expected. He ducked and whirled away a moment later, opening up the distance between us quickly.

"Well, well, if it isn't Naruto-kun," he called out, adjusting his glasses as he ran a hand along the cut, the green chakra of a medical jutsu removing the damage with ease. "I'm surprised to see you here."

"Abort the mission, genin," the surviving Konoha-nin called out, panting. He looked to be in rough shape as he staggered to his feet, but his hands were moving through a hand-seals quickly.

Kabuto frowned, moving towards the wounded ninja again.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I yelled, pointing at Kabuto. The moment the words left my mouth the sound of chirping birds filled the clearing, and even as my clones dog-piled Kabuto Sasuke darted out of the trees behind me, moving about as fast as I had ever seen him.

"Chidori!" he yelled as he blitzed the pile of clones, thrusting one hand into the center of the mess. He jumped back a moment later, panting with exertion but glancing down at his blood-covered arm with grim satisfaction.

The remaining clones dispelled and the smoke quickly cleared away to reveal Kabuto down on one knee and grasping at the stump where his left arm used to be. Despite the pain he must have been in and the seriousness of the wound, he was still grinning widely.

"Impressive, Sasuke-kun," Kabuto said as he pulled himself to his feet. "Orochimaru-sama will be greatly pleased with your progress."

"Kimimaro is coming, from the northeast," Hinata said quickly, already turning to face in that direction.

"Naruto," Sasuke said quickly, nodding towards Kabuto. "Take him out."

I nodded grimly, pulling out another kunai and moving a few paces to the side so that the surviving Konoha-nin wasn't in the way. Kabuto had slowly walked over and picked up his severed limb, eying it carefully before looking back up at me.

"Oh, Naruto-kun is going to take me out, is he?" Kabuto asked, smirking. "Do you really think you-"

I launched the kunai forward, running through the familiar hand-seals once again. The wall of kunai swept through the air, tearing up the dirt and grass and slamming into the sparse trees in the distance.

"He's here!" Hinata yelled, barely getting the words out before she was desperately fending off Kimimaro, her hands moving rapidly as she deflected his strikes with that freaky bone-sword of his as best she could. Despite her efforts Kimimaro had already landed several cuts along her arms and a nasty one on her left leg.

"Kage Bunshin Barrage!" I yelled, jabbing one hand towards Kimimaro as I charged forward.

The first clone landed a mule kick that launched him into the air, and Sasuke didn't waste any time crying out, "Overpower!" and blurring through hand-seals before drawing in a deep breath. A large fireball emerged, barreling towards Kimimaro's form and engulfing it in an inferno.

"Nice one, teme!" I cheered. I turned my attention to Hinata, who was struggling to wrap bandages around her wounds as quickly as she could to halt the bleeding. Before I could move to help her, though, a large whip emerged from the dissipating fireball, slamming into Sasuke and sending him spinning to the side with a splash of blood. Kimimaro stepped forward, portions of his skin seared and blackened and a grimace on his face, but still obviously capable of continuing the fight. He looked like he was wearing some sort of white armor that he hadn't been just a few seconds earlier, and I'd swear it looked like it was made out of bone.

This guy was seriously creeping me out.

Kimimaro's whip coiled around him for a moment before he snapped his arm forward, sending it towards me faster than I could have possibly dodged.

I didn't need to, though, since Army of One was still up. "Sasuke! Plan C!" I yelled out as I charged forward, ignoring the way the whip was cutting back and forth through my body.

"Got it!" I heard him yell back.

I closed in with Kimimaro, fists flying quickly as I struck at his ribs and joints but completely failed to do any visible damage through that freaky bone armor of his. His eyes narrowed in irritation as his own attacks failed to do any damage to me either.

Then the sound of chirping birds filled the clearing again and I dove forward abruptly, tangling myself up in his legs and pulling him to the ground. His blade stabbed through me several times without effect, and I grinned up at him.

"I told you I'd kill you," I said.

He looked down at me, confused, even as he continued to try to tear himself free. I held on grimly, preventing him from moving easily as the sound of chirping birds rapidly drew closer.

Then he stilled abruptly and raised his left arm, his skin bulging as it something was moving under it.

"Chidori!" Sasuke roared as he thrust his arm forward. The technique was too bright to look at from this close, so I shut my eyes and turned my head, still holding on grimly.

I felt something wet and warm dripping onto me and finally opened my eyes to see Sasuke and Kimimaro locked in place. Kimimaro had somehow gotten more of that freaky bone armor of his - I was trying very hard not to think about just where that stuff was coming from - but either he hadn't gotten enough of it in time or it hadn't been strong enough, since Sasuke's arm was sticking through it. Kimimaro had twisted the shield around or something, though, because from where I was it looked like Sasuke's arm was being held in place by it.

Kimimaro had also grown some other spikes, several of which were sticking out of Sasuke's arm; that was the source of the blood that was dripping onto me. I could see Sasuke's face twisting in pain, though the only sound he made was a low grunt.

I pushed off the ground, rising up and striking at any exposed areas on Kimimaro I could see. I still didn't feel like I was doing any real damage, but it was enough to make him shift his position, loosening his grip on Sasuke and allowing my teammate to jump backwards, clutching at his arm. Hinata came running up, one hand glowing green as she reached out towards Sasuke's arm.

Huh, since when did Hinata know medical jutsu?

Her hand lashed out, slamming into the back of Sasuke's neck and dropping him like a bag of rocks. She spun towards me next, the green glow dissipating and four short chakra blades emerging from her hand as she tried to stab me.

"What the fuck!" I yelled as I dropped back, only to find Kimimaro wielding a pair of white sword-like bones slashing and stabbing at me.

Hinata's form wavered for a moment then vanished to reveal Kabuto in her place, both of his arms firmly attached and that smug grin in his face.

"That was a good try, Naruto-kun," he said as he adjusted his glasses, "but I'll be taking Sasuke-kun now. Bye bye!"

"Dammit!" I yelled, trying to push past Kimimaro. I looked over to see Hinata sprawled on the ground, a pool of blood once more forming around her. I felt my control over my body slipping even as Kabuto picked up Sasuke and took off, and I knew this wasn't going to turn out any better than it had the last time.

~ Scene Break ~

**Following the death of his teammates Hinata Hyuuga and Naruto Uzumaki, Sasuke Uchiha was successfully captured by Orochimaru's forces. The loss of the Sharingan to the Snake Sannin proved to be a critical factor in the conflicts to come, but it was the loss of the Kyuubi jinchuuriki that ultimately led to the downfall of Konoha.**

**You have failed.**

**Do you wish to restart at a checkpoint?**

"Well... shit."

~ End Chapter ~

**A/N: It should be clear now, but Naruto isn't locked into using the most recent checkpoint whenever he gets a game over. They ****are****, however, stuck with the most recent checkpoint taking place after they accepted the mission. It's now also confirmed that the party members keep their memories (and progress) following a checkpoint load.**

**Special Missions, as you may have gathered by now, are a serious step up in difficulty from the more run-of-the-mill missions. **

**As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**


	12. Life Seven: Ninja Hunter

_**Do you wish to restart at a checkpoint?**_

_"Well... shit."_

I opened my mouth to say yes, then immediately closed it again. I dropped onto the... well, there wasn't exactly a _floor _as such, but I was now sitting on something with my legs and arms crossed. My brow furrowed as I tried to think about what had just happened.

"We took out that first group, no problem," I muttered to myself. "And we even got to the support team in time to save some of them. I _thought _we'd gotten Kabuto, but he must have dodged my attack somehow. And that Kimimaro guy... he was just _insane. _What the hell are we supposed to do if even Sasuke's Chidori fails?" I hummed thoughtfully, turning my head to one side then the other before I jumped to my feet with a scream of frustration.

"Think, dammit!" I growled. "Shika's smart, _and _he's already a chuunin. What would he do?"

An idea popped into my head and I immediately dropped into a crouch, bringing up my hands to form a circle in front of me. "Troublesome... troublesome..." I muttered, sticking a bored expression on my face

The first thing I thought of was to use a technique stronger than a Chidori, and the first technique that popped into my head was the Rasengan. The problem with that, though, was that I hadn't quite managed to actually get it working. Ero-sennin had said I was on the last stage, which was just combining the first two stages, which made it sound _easy_. It wasn't. It wasn't easy at all. I was getting better, yeah, and I knew I'd get it soon enough, but I wasn't there yet. I guess I could practice in the two days it took for the Sound ninja to show up... and maybe the two days the next time around... and the next...

I shook my head and refocused. I'd get it eventually, but I needed something I could use _now_. Dammit, if it was Shika he would either come up with some crazy plan that somehow managed to work without even having to move, or he'd just give up right off the bat. If what I heard was right and us dying and Sasuke getting captured was a huge deal, then it might be better if we _did _just quit. But quitting was...

Screw that! No way I was going to do that! I wasn't going to give that bastard Kabuto and that freaky bone guy Kimimaro the satisfaction! And besides, we were supposed to capture at _least_ one... of...

My jaw dropped as I stared down at my hands.

"Holy _shit!_" I breathed. "It works!"

~ Scene Break ~

Hinata stumbled forward, a confused expression on her face as her hands flashed up to grab the back of her head. Sasuke just blinked and shook his head, then turned to look at me expectantly.

Tsunade cleared her throat, one eyebrow raised as she looked at us with a curious expression.

"Right, the mission," I said quickly, nodding. "We'll... get right on that."

Tsunade watched us walk out of her office before she shook her head and went back to her paperwork.

~ Scene Break ~

"Wh-what happened?" Hinata asked hesitantly as we left the Hokage's Tower. "You and Sasuke were fighting Kimimaro, and then..." She kept touching a hand to the back of her head and then examining it closely as if she expected to find something on it.

"I think Kabuto got you," I told her, frowning darkly. "Kimimaro managed to block Sasuke's Chidori by growing some weird bone shield thing and trapping his arm. We got away from him and thought you were coming over to heal us up, but it turned out to be Kabuto under a _henge_. He knocked out Sasuke and I ended up going berserk again when I realized what happened. That's _really _getting annoying," I added with a frown.

"No kidding," Sasuke snorted in agreement.

"I-I'm s-sorry," Hinata said, pulling her jacket tighter around her and hunching her shoulders. "I even had my Byakugan on, but I d-didn't see him or anything. I think I saw _s-something,_ but... s-sorry," she finished miserably.

"Huh?" I asked, staring at her in confusion. "How the hell is that your fault? Those two kicked all of our asses. I'm not even sure we actually managed to really _hurt _either one of them. The only thing we did to Kimimaro was put singe him a bit and punch through his shield, and Kabuto had both of his arms when he showed back up. Both of those guys are just _crazy _strong."

Hinata stared at me, her lips curving into a tentative smile. Sasuke just grunted and shoved his hands into his pockets.

"What are we going to do, then? We know more of what Kimimaro is capable of now, and we know we need to keep track of Kabuto as well even if we do manage to wound him. If we take that into account..." he trailed off, his eyes narrowing in thought.

"Oh! Oh!" I bounced on my heels, grinning widely. "I want to wait until the rest of the group gets here, but I had an _awesome_ idea!"

~ Scene Break ~

"Shika!" I shouted, waving my arm to get his attention. He looked over at me, sighing dramatically before slouching over. I could see his lips move and, though I couldn't hear him, was sure he'd just said "Troublesome" again. Chouji looked as calm as ever as he walked beside his friend, but Hanabi looked kinda annoyed. I set that aside for the moment.

"Shika!" I repeated when everyone had gathered together and moved to the side of the road. "Man, I'm never making fun of your thinking pose again! That thing totally works!"

Sasuke dropped his head into his hands, muttering something under his breath too low for me to catch. Hanabi just stared at me with a disbelieving expression on her face while Shika eyed me curiously.

"I take it you thought of something," he said slowly.

"Oh yeah! See, I was stuck in that weird checkpoint place again and wanted to charge right back in, but then I thought about how I'm supposed to be thinking like a chuunin now and be all smart and stuff, so then I thought about what you would do so I used that pose thing while muttering 'troublesome' over and over and it _worked_! How awesome is that?"

Chouji went into a coughing fit and turned to lean against the wall, turning his back to us. Shika had a sour look on his face as he shot a glare at him, before sighing and turning back to me.

"And?" he asked in an annoyed voice.

"Well, see, I _really _want to kick Kabuto's ass for betraying Konoha and that Kimimaro bastard's ass for killing Hinata like that, but those guys are _way _too strong right now. Like, Kakashi-sensei or Crazy Snake Lady strong. But there's no way we'd just give up like that either, right? But _then _I thought that the mission didn't have anything to do with fighting those guys in the first place, not really. We just have to capture one of the Sound ninja and then make it back to Konoha in one piece, right? So why don't we just grab one of those ninja who attack us first and make a run for it?"

Nobody was saying anything. The silence was getting to me a little, so I pressed on.

"I mean, I know those two are really fast so we'd have to get a big head start or lose them somehow, and I'm not sure how to do that just yet, but I figure I can make a lot of clones and pretend to be Hinata and Sasuke and, well, _me_ and just run every which way. They wouldn't be able to tell which one was the real us, and my clones are good enough to slow them down at least a little. And Hinata would be able to tell when they were getting close so I could throw out more clones and we could change directions or something, right?"

I fell silent, my gaze focused on Shika.

"That..." Shika said at last, looking thoughtful. "That could work."

I felt a knot of tension release at his words. "See? I told you it was awesome!" I grinned.

Hanabi crossed her arms, scoffing lightly. "I suppose even an idiot can have a good idea once in a while," she said.

"Hanabi!" Hinata chided, frowning.

Hanabi flinched slightly, then looked away, muttering an apology under her breath. Chouji just gave me a small grin and a nod while Sasuke frowned, staring into the distance.

Shika dropped into a crouch against the side of a nearby building, his eyes closing as he adopted his thinking pose.

"How many clones can you make?" he asked after a moment.

"Uh..." I scratched my cheek as I tried to remember. "I think the most I've done is a hundred or so? Never really tried to make more than that."

His eyes flew open as he stared at me, shocked. "A _hundred_?" he yelped. He held up a hand and shook his head. "Never mind," he muttered. "Do you think that's your limit?"

I shrugged. I really had no idea.

"Do you have time to test that?"

I looked over at Sasuke who just shrugged and nodded.

~ Scene Break ~

"Alright, so just make clones like normal first," Shika instructed once we had made it to training ground.

"Got it," I said, bringing up my hands and making the sign for the Kage Bunshin technique. A dozen clones appeared in small puffs of smoke, all of them looking around curiously. I grinned at how smoothly that had gone - even a month ago there would have been a lot more smoke and probably three or four more clones in the mix. My control was definitely getting better.

"Now try to make as many as you can."

The first batch of clones dismissed themselves as I began focusing my chakra. This would be the first time in... man, _months _at least that I actually tried to use _more _chakra instead of less. I could feel the chakra building up as it became visible, causing my hands, then my arms, then my whole body to start giving off a blue glow. I could still pull on more, however, and I was kinda curious to see just how many I-

"Stop! _Stop_!" Shika yelled out.

I faltered as I lost focus and the glow abruptly vanished. I turned to look at Shika with a confused expression to see him staring at me with wide eyes.

"What?" I asked. "You told me to make as many as I could!"

He swallowed thickly and nodded slowly. I glanced over at the others to see if they knew what his problem was, but most of them looked much the same. Chouji and Hanabi were every bit as wide-eyed as Shika, and Sasuke looked both surprised and thoughtful. Hinata, on the other hand, just had a small smile on her face.

"I _told _you guys," Hanabi muttered after a few seconds. "He's got more chakra than all of us combined. He's got more than us, the Hokage, _and_ Jiraiya-sama combined. A _lot _more."

I laughed nervously, glancing away as I finally realized why they were so surprised. At least they didn't know _why _I had so much more chakra.

"Right," Shika said, clearing his throat roughly. "How about... why don't you try that again, but only charge up the technique for, say, three seconds."

"Three seconds," I repeated, nodding quickly. I was more than ready to change the subject at that point. I brought up my hands again, making sure that I went easy on the chakra this time. "One, two, three," I counted out loud, then called out, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

There was a lot more smoke this time, and I scanned around trying to make a quick count. I'd only made it to forty or see when Sasuke grunted out, "One hundred thirteen."

"One hundred twenty four, actually," Hanabi corrected smugly. "Some appeared behind the trees." Sasuke narrowed his eyes at her, and she just crossed her arms and smirked back at him.

I looked back to find Shika back in his thinking pose, a small grin growing on his face. "This can _definitely _work."

We spent another hour refining the plan, hashing out the steps we needed to take, all the ways it could go wrong, what to do about the support teams, and even which specific enemy ninja to grab. My head felt like it was going to fall off by the halfway point, but I did my best to stay focused and pay attention. Shika was rattling off plans and contingencies and scenarios and Sasuke was right there with him, bringing up the details of the techniques the ninja had used and their interactions with each other and how to use that against them. Hinata and Chouji and even Hanabi were throwing in their own opinions, pointing out things that had never even crossed my mind. Like how Kabuto must have some way of remotely communicating with Kimimaro given how well coordinated their actions were, or how Kimimaro had not displayed any ranged abilities whatsoever, or how Kabuto must have traveled underground to avoid the Byakugan's detection.

_This_ was what a chuunin had to do, and one way or another I was going to learn how to do it too.

~ Scene Break ~

"They're here, exactly the same as last time," Hinata called out.

I immediately created two groups of a dozen clones that split off and sped towards the support teams. There was no reason for them to stay behind and get killed when we were about to be heading out ourselves. I then created another dozen clones, tossing a kunai to each before sending them out to surround the incoming Sound ninja.

Preparations complete, I nodded to Sasuke. His smirked and nodded back. I looked over at Hinata, whose face was set in a determined expression that was only enhanced by her still activated Byakugan.

"Go," Sasuke said simply.

~ Scene Break ~

The Sound team stopped short when they saw us, glancing around warily and spreading out slightly as they prepared for combat.

"Looks like the trash came out to play," Kidomaru sneered.

I raised my hands in a cross and began gathering chakra. One... Two...

"What the fuck are you gonna do, shithead?" the red-headed girl called out. "You even try to finish that technique and I'll-"

Her words were cut off as a horde of clones appeared in the middle of the Sound ninja, all of them immediately lashing out. The clones nearest the redhead slammed into her and began running, carrying her away from her team even as she kicked and punched, dispelling two of them. Two more immediately took their place, however.

"Now!" Hinata called out, and the clones I'd stationed around the clearing beforehand threw their kunai. A globe of metallic death descended on the chaotic melee, and everything fell silent.

"Fucking fuckers! I'll fucking rip off your fucking balls and-"

Well, mostly silent. The foul-mouthed redhead hadn't yet noticed what had happened to the rest of her team, too busy trying to fend off the press of clones. She too fell silent when Sasuke appeared behind her and delivered a sharp chop to the back of her neck, knocking her unconscious. He pulled out a bundle of wire and began efficiently tying her up while simultaneously stripping off all the pouches and equipment she carried on her. He made especially certain to break the flute into multiple pieces, rendering it completely unusable.

"Show time, Naruto," he said as he completed his work.

I brought up my hands again, pulling on chakra for a slow five count before executing the clone technique. A haze of smoke filled the area as the clones appeared and began pairing off in groups of four, each using the _henge _to alter their appearance into one of my teammates, my prisoner, or even myself. I personally used a _henge_ to look like Hinata, Hinata used one to look like Sasuke, and Sasuke picked up our prisoner before applying the technique to the two of them, resulting in the appearance of me with the redhead tossed over my shoulder.

"Let's go," Sasuke called out. We all began running at a swift pace, though I was frowning as I did so.

My voice wasn't _that _high-pitched, was it?

~ Scene Break ~

The first hour was incredibly tense.

Twice Hinata reported that she had sighted Kimimaro closing in. It turned out he did have a ranged attack after all, as he somehow managed to shoot bits of bone out of his hands. The things moved faster than most ninja could throw a kunai, and it took him only a matter of moments to fire them at the legs of each group of clones he came across. He'd cut through two more by the time Hinata had finished telling us what was going on, and was well on his way to finding a third. I threw out a new bunch of clones and sent them scrambling all over the place, making sure they knew to avoid his ranged attacks at all costs. That slowed him down quite a bit, and we eventually got far enough away that we lost track of him completely.

The second time I didn't bother trying to disguise the clones; I just sent a wave of them straight after him with orders to delay him as long as possible. Individually each one only lasted a few seconds once he got close, but they made great use of the trees and other terrain to keep him at range as long as possible, preventing him from continuing his search and slowly leading him in the wrong direction.

Sasuke finally made the call to shift our course so that we weren't heading directly towards Konoha but instead on a winding approach that would add nearly a day to our journey and end up with us coming in from the north rather than the east. I made another batch of decoys to further cover our tracks and we took off.

We didn't see Kabuto at all, which I wasn't sure was a good thing or not. Still, by the time we were ready to camp out for the night we figured that the plan had worked.

"Mmphing mmphs! Mm mmph hhr mmphing mmphs mm hhr phr mmph _mmphrmm_!" our prisoner tried to spit out through her gag.

"She's awake again," I pointed out, sighing.

"Really?" Sasuke asked sarcastically. "What gave it away?"

"Mmph mm mmr mmph! _Mmph!_"

"S-sorry," Hinata stuttered as she stood and moved over to the red-head who was bound and gagged against the side of the tree. "Um, s-should we feed her or give her something to drink? It has b-been several hours n-now..."

"_Mmphing mmmphrmmphrr_!"

I shrugged. I'm sure she was thirsty and hungry by now, yeah, but it's not like going without for a while longer was going to hurt her.

Sasuke stood and made his way over to glare down at our captive. "Do you think you can keep your mouth shut long enough to drink something?"

The girl matched his glare with one of her own and even managed a passable sneer through her gag. She didn't say anything else, though.

Sasuke picked up a bottle and then tugged the gag aside before tipping it over so that some water poured into her mouth. She swallowed quickly, her glare not faltering in the least. until Sasuke finally righted the bottle again.

"W-what's your name?" Hinata asked hesitantly, shrinking back slightly when the girl turned her glare on her.

"None of your fucking business, bi-" she started before Sasuke shoved the gag back in her mouth.

"Looks like she's not hungry," he smirked as he pulled out a ration bar and unwrapped it in front of her.

"Mph mph mmmph mmph mmph mm mmph mph, mmph-mmphrr!"

Sasuke just grinned before nodding to Hinata, who reached out and tapped the back of the prisoner's neck. Her eyes rolled up in the back of her head as she passed out again.

"Hey, Naruto," Sasuke said as he finished off his ration bar. "I've been wondering... how did you get so much chakra, anyway?"

I froze for a moment before reaching into my pack to pull out one of my own ration bars. "I don't really know," I told him, focusing on unwrapping the bar. "Shika thinks it's a bloodline or something, which makes sense to me. I mean, I don't know who my parents were or anything, so I could have gotten it from one of them."

"I t-think you should talk to the Hokage," Hinata started as she joined us, "She's a really good med-nin. L-legendary, even. She w-would be able to tell for s-sure."

I swallowed the horrible-tasting food, pasting a smile on my face. "Maybe she could, yeah." I knew that she already knew exactly what it was, but I still didn't want anyone else to know. I mean, Shika had found out and he didn't seem to care much, but he didn't really care about most stuff. For everybody like him and Iruka-sensei, there was going to be somebody like Mizuki or some of the parents I'd heard talking about me. I hadn't known what they meant for the longest time, just that they didn't like me for some reason and were happy whenever I screwed up or got in trouble. Now that I knew _why _they didn't like me, it just made it worse.

I didn't want to find out that one of the people I thought of as friends would see me like that, too.

We lapsed into silence, Sasuke staring at me with an odd expression on his face and Hinata alternating between staring at her food and glancing at me out of the corner of her eye.

~ Scene Break ~

**Special Mission "The Snake's Tail" Complete! XP: 10,000; Bonus XP: 0**

We all breathed out a sigh of relief as we stepped through the gates and finally completed the mission.

**Achievement Unlocked: Better Part Of Valor (20)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Third Time's The Charm (30)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Thwartin' Mah Plans (I) (50)**

**A new Special Mission has been unlocked.**

**Congratulations! You have reached Level 12!**

Sasuke let out a groan when he heard the bit about the special mission, and I was right there with him.

"We are _not _doing another one of those right now," he said firmly, turning to glare at me. Even with the prisoner tossed over his shoulder it was still a fairly good one.

"Hey, no argument here," I said, raising my hands defensively. "Dying sucks!"

"Chuunin Uchiha," one ANBU said as a group of four of them appeared out of nowhere. "Please surrender custody of your prisoner and report with your team to the Hokage immediately for a debriefing."

Sasuke nodded quickly, passing the unconscious Sound ninja over to one of the ANBU. Two of the group immediately disappeared again, taking the girl with them, while the other two took up positions on either side of us.

We shared a concerned look before heading for the Hokage's Tower.

~ Scene Break ~

We stood lined up in front of the Hokage's desk, waiting for her to acknowledge us while she finished reading through some document. Normally I would have said something by now, probably still would have if it had been Hokage-jiji - my heart clenched painfully at yet another reminder that the closest thing I had to a family was gone now - but there was a tension in the room that even I could pick up on.

Finally, Tsunade set down the scroll and leaned back in her seat, one hand coming up to play with a strange gem that hung from the necklace around her neck. She stared at us for several seconds, weighing each of us in turn, then let out a slow breath.

"I've got three dead ninja, a battlefield covered with blood but no bodies, and a _decoy team _that drops out of contact for three days before waltzing back in with a prisoner literally slung over their shoulders," she said calmly. "What the _hell _happened out there?" Ok, not so calm.

Sasuke stepped forward slightly, his stance professional with his arms clasped behind his back and his head held high. "Hokage-sama, I made a judgment call in the field to abandon the original plan after enemy ninja bypassed the strike teams to attack us directly." He waited for her nod before continuing. "Four Sound ninja, each bearing the cursed seal, were sent to combat our team directly. Their individual skill levels ranged from C- to B-rank, but their abilities, coordination, and numbers made them a serious threat. Further, we had completely lost contact with the strike teams and determined that something had gone wrong with the mission."

I managed to not gape at Sasuke as he launched into a highly edited account of our mission. None of it was _wrong_ outright, but none of it had happened quite like he was making it seem, either. I didn't really get why he was doing that, but I wasn't going to interrupt him either.

"After a brief consultation with my team," Sasuke continued, "we unanimously decided to target a single enemy ninja for capture while disabling or killing the rest. We successfully subdued one target while killing the others, then began an immediate extraction from the area. While we-"

"Hold it," Tsunade said, raising one hand as she interrupted him. "_How _did you kill the others?"

Sasuke glanced at me before turning to face Tsunade again. "We coordinated our efforts to lure the enemy ninja into a trap. Naruto seeded an area with his clones while all three of us managed to maneuver three of the Sound ninja into a sufficiently tight grouping. Naruto then created enough clones to lock the enemy in place while using the first set of clones to launch a coordinated Kunai Kage Bunshin assault. I personally subdued the remaining ninja."

Tsunade glanced down at her report, then over to me. "All of that damage was from _kunai_?"

I nodded, not knowing how else to respond.

Tsunade made a note before looking back to Sasuke. "Continue."

"While we were retreating, Naruto created more clones disguised as the entire team and our prisoner to serve as decoys and attempt to make contact with the strike teams to let them know what we were doing. During this, Hinata detected two more enemy ninja. One was an unknown ninja with techniques that revolved around growing bones out of his own body, while the other was Kabuto Yakushi."

One of Tsunade's eyebrows raised. "The traitor who cast the genjutsu over the arena during the attack on the exams?"

I was surprised at that. I knew he was a traitor now, yeah, but I hadn't known he'd been personally involved in the attack like that.

"I suppose so, Hokage-sama," Sasuke answered, a bit of surprise in his voice. "We were not aware he was a traitor at first, though Hinata quickly noticed his Sound headband and suspicious movements. We managed to avoid both of them using more clones as decoys and by altering our course to a more roundabout route."

"So you never made direct contact with the other two ninja, then?"

"Not directly, no, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade nodded slowly, looking thoughtful. "Do you have anything else to report? Did your prisoner say anything?"

I choked back a laugh, which drew Tsunade's attention back to me. "Is something funny?"

"The only thing she bothered to say whenever she wasn't gagged was cursing at us. I've never heard anybody swear that much."

Sasuke and Hinata both nodded in agreement.

"So no actual information, then?" Tsunade asked.

"No, Hokage-sama," Sasuke replied. "We didn't even get her name."

"Anything else?"

We glanced at each other and shook our heads.

"Very well then. I'll expect your full written reports by tomorrow," she said in a clipped tone. After a moment some of the tension seemed to ease out of the room and she looked at us with a softer, kinder expression. "I'm relieved that the three of you made it back safely, and impressed that you managed to salvage something from the mission after all. The outcome was far from perfect, but it could have been a lot worse."

Sasuke nodded after a moment. "Thank you, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade smirked and flipped her hand at us, already turning back to the paperwork on her desk. "Now get out of here and get some rest."

~ Scene Break ~

We met up with the rest of the group outside of the Tower, and quickly decided to head back to my apartment.

"So I take it the plan worked, then?" Shika asked as we settled around my kitchen table. It was getting a little crowded with the six of us, but Hanabi hopped up on the counter rather than taking up one of the chairs and Sasuke just leaned against the wall nearby.

"Yeah!" I cheered. "It was _awesome_! The clones worked great and Hinata could see Kabuto and Kimimaro coming from _miles_ out! They didn't have a chance of catching us!"

"So what do we do now?" Sasuke asked before I could say anything further.

Shika tipped back in his chair, letting his head flop back so that he was staring at the ceiling. "We have several short-term goals already," he began. "We need to get Naruto to chuunin so that we can recruit more people, we need to get the rest of us to chuunin so that we can take more missions and the same for whoever we end up recruiting. There's still a few things we know about but haven't quite figured out how to use yet, like if we really can bring somebody back without using Hinata's Resuscitate ability."

I nodded, listening intently and absently noting that everybody else was doing the same.

"We can spend more time practicing, maxing out our skills to the prescribed limits and studying what difference it makes. We can gain experience and levels, becoming stronger. We can learn techniques and make sure we can use them well, either individually or as part of a team..." he trailed off, rocking his chair slightly back and forth.

"So what's the problem?" Sasuke asked, crossing his arms.

"Troublesome...," Shika sighed, leaning forward and letting all four legs of the chair rest on the floor again. He propped his elbows up on the table and rested his head on his hands as he looked around at the people gathered in the kitchen.

"The _problem_ is that's all short-term stuff. It helps, yes, but in the grand scheme of things it means nothing. I've been thinking a lot about just what's been happening while you guys were doing out on the special mission." He snorted in amusement, shaking his head. "That's the perfect example. _Why _was that a special mission? _Why _did _we _get to choose whether or not it happened? Even more than that, _why _did it only show up after Sasuke was recruited?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed in thought, but he didn't come up with an answer to those questions. Not that any of the rest of us did either.

"Orochimaru didn't suddenly decide he wanted to the Sharingan because Sasuke just happened to show up and join us while we were looking for the next Hokage. This has been in the works for years, and I'm certain that giving Sasuke the Cursed Seal was a part of it as well. What do you think would have happened if we _didn't _know about that special mission?"

Sasuke looked a little pale.

"Hey! There's no way I'd let the bastard do anything to Sasuke! I'd have gone back to a checkpoint and-"

Shika held up his hand, cutting me off. "And what if you couldn't go back to a checkpoint? What if none of this had happened? What would have happened to Sasuke then?"

Sasuke looked downright sick at that point.

"We wouldn't have been able to do anything," Shika continued bluntly. "Sasuke would have been taken at some point, and you and Sakura and Kakashi might or might not have lived to let the rest of us know just what had happened."

"And if N-Naruto-kun had d-died, then..." Hinata said quietly, her voice filled with worry and concern.

"According to what we've been told, Konoha would eventually fall. We might not have even made it this far, in fact. Without our new abilities, those two ninja with Akatsuki might have taken Naruto right then and there. I don't think I was meant to be included in that mission originally, despite how things ended up, so I wouldn't have been there to delay them long enough for Jiraiya to show up."

"So what do we do?" Chouji asked, staring at Shika with an intense expression. "What's the point of all this?"

Shika just looked back at Chouji, a tired expression on his face.

"We win!" I burst out, slamming my hand onto the table as I jumped to my feet. "Screw all this might have been crap! We aren't dead or abducted or whatever, and we're gonna stay that way! We'll kick Orochimaru's ass, we'll kick Akatsuki's ass, and we'll kick everybody else's ass if that's what it takes! Just like with that stupid special mission! We may not be strong enough now, but we'll figure out some way to come out on top! And later on, when we run into those bastards again, we _will _be strong enough!"

I dropped back into my chair and crossed my arms, staring defiantly at Shika. What good was being smart if all it did was make you worry about stupid crap like that?

Shika ran his hands over his face. "Troublesome...," he muttered as he rubbed his forehead. "You are _entirely _too troublesome," he continued, looking up at me with a wry grin on his face.

Sasuke cleared his throat, pulling my attention away from Shika. He still looked a little shaken, but he nodded at me with a slight smirk. "The _dobe's _got a point. In fact, it kinda seems like this whole thing is happening just to let us do exactly that, doesn't it?"

"That's all fine and everything," Hanabi piped up from her perch on the counter. She had her elbow propped on her knee and chin resting on her fist as she looked at us with an almost bored expression. "But that still leaves us with the question of _how_. Yeah, we get stronger. Yeah, we get more levels and abilities and traits and whatever. But we're still just genin and chuunin; we aren't exactly calling the shots, are we? How are we supposed to go after Orochimaru and Akatsuki and all that?"

Sasuke and Shika both straightened abruptly, giving each other disbelieving looks.

"You don't think..." Sasuke started.

"That would explain..." Shika picked up.

"But for that to work..."

"We'd have to be at least..."

"Hey! Would one of you at least finish a sentence or something?" I growled out, getting annoyed at their half-finished conversation.

They both turned to look at me, staring intently for several seconds, then looked back at each other.

"There's no way," Sasuke said, though it sounded a little forced.

"_Way _too troublesome," Shika muttered, shaking his head.

"What?" What _were _they talking about? I couldn't make any sense out of that whatsoever, and it didn't look like the others did much better either.

Shika cleared his throat. "Hanabi has a point, and I think that gives us a good long-term goal to aim for. We already know what it takes to get promoted, and with promotions comes greater influence over the direction the village takes and the missions we might get. I know Naruto has already tried explaining what was going on to multiple jounin and even the Hokage without success, but we _have _had better luck going about things a little more subtly. We were able to make use of our new abilities to influence Jiraiya, for instance, and we didn't need to directly explain what was happening or why."

I rubbed my chin as I remembered that trick Shika had pulled with the map. "I guess that's true," I muttered.

"I'm the closest to tokubetsu-jounin so far, and Sasuke isn't far behind. Naruto still needs to reach chuunin, and I believe he's only four missions off at this point. With both Sasuke and I to take missions, however, we can have the entire group working on C-ranks. What do you guys think?" he asked, looking around.

I grinned widely. Now _that_ was a plan I could get behind.

~ End Chapter ~

**A/N: As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**


	13. Life Seven: Advance Ninjas

"Alright, let's try another one," Shika called out as he lay on the side of the hill, staring up at the passing clouds.

I stifled a groan, instead splitting my attention between the whirling ball of chakra in my hand and Shika's upcoming question. I was getting better and better and the Rasengan every day, but I still couldn't quite manage to keep it stable for more than a second or two, and it certainly wasn't anything like the one Ero-sennin had shown me.

Shika had come up with this torture - he called it an 'efficient way to pass the time,' but I was sticking with my term for it - as a way to help me prepare for my upcoming promotion test. He'd give me some scenario or puzzle that I had to pick apart and find an answer to, and whenever I did answer he'd keep poking and prodding about why I answered that way, and what else I had thought of.

The Rasengan wasn't actually part of the training, exactly, but he said I got fidgety if I didn't have something else to focus on between the questions. I _don't_, but he is helping me become a chuunin so I'm not going to argue with him on that.

"Ready when you are," I called back, letting another failed Rasengan fade away.

"You're in the middle of enemy territory on a solo mission. You have already completed your mission and are trying to get back to the village without attracting any attention. You know there are three enemy ninja nearby, and you can see one of them from your current position. They are alert, but don't show any signs that know you are an enemy or that they are looking for anyone in particular. You have to get away from them without drawing their attention somehow, though."

He paused, giving me a few seconds to absorb the information. I formed another Rasengan as I thought over what he'd said.

"Alone, enemies nearby, trying to sneak out. Got it," I told him.

"Suddenly, one of them changes directions and begins moving towards your position."

Ah, crap, This was going to be one of those time limit ones, I could already tell.

"You have ten seconds to make a choice before they are close enough to attack you. What do you do? Ten."

The Rasengan wobbled and fell apart in a burst of chakra, but I ignored that for the moment as I focused on Shika. I had a little bit of time, enough to ask a question or two. "Uh, do I know where the other ninja are?"

"No. Eight."

"Do... do I know what drew his attention?"

"No. Six."

Crap. My first response would be to attack and make a run for it, but with other ninja in the area that could land me in an ambush.

"Five."

Dammit, what was the trick here? _All _of Shika's questions had some sort of trick. The ninja is getting closer, he's got more allies around him, and I'm...

"Four."

"Where _am _I, exactly?"

"You are sitting in a restaurant, eating lunch. Two."

"Nothing!" I blurted quickly. "I don't do anything!"

"Zero. Explain your answer," Shika ordered, his head rolling to the side so he could look at me directly.

I scowled at him a little, but know he was doing his best to act like a proctor would during the real exam and so didn't hold it against him.

"Nothing you actually said means that he knows I'm an enemy ninja, or that he's even approaching me directly. He could be about to order lunch, for all I know."

Shika nodded, looking back up at the clouds. "Correct," he said, smiling a little. "You were not given enough information to make an informed decision about the situation, but the phrasing and time limit were meant to pressure you into making a snap judgment." He smirked at me. "You've come a long way from spamming clones and starting a riot in an enemy village."

"I only did that the one time!" I yelled.

"And that poor kunoichi was just trying to ask you out on a date," Shika said in mock sadness, not even trying to hide his smirk.

"You said she was acting suspicious! And that she had several other kunoichi around keeping a close watch on me!"

He snickered to himself for a moment, then sat up. "That aside, I think you've got a handle on that sort of puzzle now."

I scratched the back of my head, looking off to the side. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I should have at least looked at the stuff on the table more closely, and asked more questions."

Shika nodded. "Based on what you told me, they were definitely trying to rush you and prevent you from looking too closely at your options. There's no telling what the actual trick was the first time around, or if they'll even have a test remotely similar to that this time, but you're getting much better at spotting those sorts of misdirections. They did the same thing during the Chuunin Exams, though it sounds like Sasuke's test had more to do with absorbing information quickly than spotting tricks.

"Still, out of the three examples we have, that's two where there's a hidden answer and another two with time pressure. Chances are good you'll get one or both of those during the next exam." He turned to look directly at me, a serious expression on his face. "You'll do fine."

I smiled weakly at him, then shook myself. "Right!" I said more forcefully, pumping a fist in the air. "I'm going to make chuunin for sure!"

~ Scene Break ~

**Naruto Uzumaki meets all requirements to test for promotion to chuunin. Do you want to proceed?**

"Yes," I said firmly.

"Naruto Uzumaki," a random ninja called out. "If you'll follow me, we can begin your examination immediately."

I nodded to the rest of the group, grinning confidently as I followed the ninja out to the testing room.

The combat test was exactly the same as I remembered; it even had the same guy giving it. It started out a little differently, though, with the guy only taking off one of the pouches and starting the match with his tanto drawn. I still won, though, and actually got in a nice kick to the side of his head just as time ran out.

"Alright, here's your evaluation," the other examiner said after they had finished consulting. "You scored a ten out of ten on defense, an eight out of ten on offense, and a six out of ten on situational awareness. Overall, an eight out of ten, which is a solid pass."

"Yeah!" I cheered, pumping one fist in the air. I did even better than last time! Some of my enthusiasm disappeared when I remembered that the next test was the one I had failed on last time.

~ Scene Break ~

"Your next test," the examiner said as soon as I walked into the room, "concerns preparation and planning. This room is considered your staging area. On the table you will find a selection of items that may or may not assist with the mission you are preparing for. You may take one of the items with you on the mission. Once you have made your selection, pass through the doorway on the other side of the room."

I listened intently as he spoke, struggling to remember all the scenarios Shika had come up with and trying my best to read underneath the underneath like Kakashi-sensei kept talking about. I knew some of what I'd done wrong last time, but in the end it still came down to me figuring it out during this new test... which was the old test?

Feeling a little confused, I walked over to the table and looked over the items again. Just like last time, there was a kunai pouch, a sealing scroll, a package, and a box. It certainly _looked _like the same test as last time, but they could have changed up stuff that wasn't obvious.

They probably did, too! I bet they've changed it so that the scroll actually _is _the right answer this time but now I'll be all freaked out about it and pick something else 'cause that failed last time! It'd be just like that one test Shika slipped in where the obviously trapped corridor in the middle of the base actually _was _the right path to take, instead of having to go through the ceiling or the floor or crawling along the walls outside or-

I shook myself, taking a deep breath and refocusing on the test. I'd picked the sealing scroll last time because it could hold a _ton _of stuff where all the other choices were a lot smaller. It had made a lot of sense - still did, really - but I knew now I'd missed something, Shika hadn't been a whole lot of help on that front, just driving home the point that I'd made my choice without getting enough information first.

At least this time I knew where to start.

I walked back over to the examiner and asked, "So, what's the mission?"

"A team has become trapped behind enemy lines," he replied calmly, like he was talking about the weather. "You are to take a small force, sneak into the area without alerting the enemy, and extract our allies safely."

"Right," I nodded. I'm pretty sure that was the same mission as last time. That made me feel a little better, at least, since that meant they weren't changing _everything_ around on me. Or were they? Maybe they just _wanted _me to- focus! "Who is on the team?"

"For the purposes of this test, assume you have a balanced squad that you have a good working relationship with."

Well _that _was useless. What did 'balanced' even mean? Was it, like, two guys and a girl like all of the genin teams balanced, or like one brainy ninja and one strong ninja and one... uh, average ninja?

None of the teams were really like that, though; I mean my team had Sakura as the brainy one and me as the strong one and Sasuke as the almost as strong one. Then there was Shika's team where he was the smart one, but Ino was also pretty smart and when Chouji really got going he could punt you across a training ground easy.

Come to think of it, did I even know how many people were going on the mission?

"Er, how many people on the team?" I asked.

"Including yourself, four."

Well, that made a difference then, yeah. Still, with four people that was a lot of abilities to work with, which didn't make it any easier... I mean, I could take me and Shika, which covered strong and smart, and then Hinata, 'cause she had the Byakugan and could patch us up and all that, and then... oh, maybe that was it!

"Does anyone on the team have any special jutsu or anything?" I asked, feeling like I was getting somewhere. Something like the Byakugan would be really useful on a rescue mission, so that could be it. Or maybe one of the items on the table would take on some special meaning depending on who else was on the mission. Maybe that was the trick to it.

That was definitely the kind of trick _Shika_ would try to pull, pointing me at the stuff on the table while the answer was actually based on the questions I asked.

"For the purposes of this exam, no. The members of the team are average ninja who know only the most common abilities and skills and possess no special bloodlines or restricted techniques."

Or not. I felt a wave of frustration wash over me as the one good idea I'd had so far turned out to be a bust. Well, what about...

"What about the people I'm rescuing? Do they have any special abilities or bloodlines or stuff?"

"The trapped ninja are a combat squad. Collectively they are A-rank, but, as with the members of your team, know only the most common abilities and skills and possess no special bloodlines or restricted techniques."

Nope. Bust.

"What about the stuff on the table, then? Is there anything special about those?" I asked, getting annoyed.

"The items on the table are as they appear."

"That's-" I started to say useless, but then paused. That totally sounded like something Hanabi would say when she was being all annoying and stuck-up, which meant... that wasn't actually a no, was it?

I hurried over to the table, examining each of the items more closely.

The kunai pouch looked new, as did the sealing scroll. The box was slightly dented on one corner, but other than that looked fine. Same with the package - the brown paper still had sharp creases where it had been neatly folded.

I frowned, then reached out and picked up the kunai pouch.

"Is that your selection?" the ninja asked as soon as I lifted it off the table.

"No," I shot back quickly. I paused, waiting for a response, but the ninja didn't say anything else.

I kept one eye on the examiner as I opened up the pouch, finding a full set of sharp kunai in the pouch. I pulled out one of the kunai, trying to see if there was a seal wrapped around it or something, but there wasn't. It was just a normal, decent quality kunai, just like the ones I had in my own pouch. I checked the other kunai quickly, but they were the same.

I dropped the pouch back on the table and picked up the box.

"Is that your selection?" the ninja asked again.

That jerk. He was trying to mess with my head! And it worked last time, I had to admit to myself. But not this time, though!

"No," I said firmly, pulling the lid off of the box. Inside was what looked like a full set of medical supplies - bandages, blood pills, the works. Which... would actually be a really nice thing to have on a rescue mission. Maybe _this _was- no, no. Don't rush. Check everything else first, _then _pick.

I placed the box back on the table and picked up the package, telling the examiner no again when he repeated his stupid question. I peeled back the paper to find some sort of official looking documents. It looked kinda like my ninja license, but a lot cheaper. There was also a small scroll with the words "Travel Permit" at the top, and a lot of words that seemed to boil down to "permitted to travel." Kinda stupid to spend all that time saying the same thing twice, but whatever.

That aside, this would be some sort of fake identity or something. There were eight of those in total, which would be enough for my team and the people we were supposed to be rescuing. Which would _also _be really useful if we were trying to sneak out by acting like civilians.

Feeling less certain that the right choice would become clear, I turned to the sealing scroll and pushed a bit of chakra into it. Nothing happened, which meant the scroll was empty. So much for that, then.

So I've got an empty scroll, medical supplies, fake identities, and kunai - which, now that I thought about it, would also be useful if it came to combat. I mean, I could just take kunai with me anyway, but I think in this case it's not _literally _kunai. It's like... stuff to heal people with, stuff to fight with, and stuff to sneak around with, and an empty scroll to carry stuff with.

"Argh!" I yelled out, throwing my hands in the air. Where was the trick, then? They were pretty clear about only taking one of the items, but now that I'd actually looked at all of them they would _all _be useful to have!

I drew in a deep breath, trying to stay focused on the exam. I had a bunch more information now, so all I had to do was go over it and look for the trick. I dropped into a crouch and formed a circle with my hands.

"Troublesome... troublesome..." I chanted.

The examiner made some sort of noise, but when I popped my eyes open to look at him he was still staring impassively at nothing. Frowning slightly, I closed my eyes again and got back to thinking.

Ok, so, four choices. I'd already done the sealing scroll, and it was completely empty so there wasn't anything special about it. So my reason for picking it in the first place was right and I still failed, so that was wrong. As for the other choices, it was supposed to be a rescue mission, not a combat mission, so fighting wasn't _guaranteed _to happen, so I may not need those at all.

The medical supplies would be great to have, but the examiner hadn't said they were hurt or anything, so maybe I wouldn't need that either? But then that left the travel papers, which, I mean, if we just snuck out some other way we wouldn't use that either, which left... nothing?

"Troublesome..." I muttered with a little more feeling. I wasn't supposed to get rid of _all_ the options, dammit!

Ok, back to thinking. Right. So, from the top. I picked the sealing scroll the last time, and the answer still made sense... but they didn't say anything about my answer or anything, did they? I mean, Shika always made sure to ask why I did or didn't do something, and he would tell me I was wrong if I couldn't give him a good reason, so...

I groaned out loud. That meant that it could be the scroll and I just said the wrong thing, didn't it? This just kept getting worse and worse. Maybe if I just picked one of the other items and made up something? I mean, if that was wrong I could still try one of the other two the next time around and-

No! Bad Naruto! I scowled as I abandoned that line of thinking. You didn't put up with Shika's crazy mind torture stuff just to wimp out now! You're Naruto Uzumaki! You don't wimp out! You keep kicking ass until you win, and that's the end of it! Believe it!

"Yeah!" I said out loud, coming out of the thinking pose as I pumped my fist in the air. The examiner was staring at me like I was crazy, but he was a jerk who was trying to mess with my head, so who cared what he thought?

Still, I needed to actually focus on the problem if I was going to kick its ass, so I sat back on my heels again and returned to the Thinking Pose. Think Shika thoughts. "Troublesome... troublesome..."

Where was the trick? I mean, I could end up using everything or nothing, and I wouldn't know until I actually got there, would I? All this really did is make the scroll even more appealing than it was the first time, since it could carry a bunch of stuff, everything I could possibly need, including all of the other-

My eyes snapped open as I turned back to the examiner, scowling at him darkly.

"You guys _suck_."

~ Scene Break ~

"I see that you chose the sealing scroll," the examiner in the next room said. "What was your reasoning?"

"My reasoning is that you guys are complete and total _assholes_, that's what my reasoning is!" I shouted. "I got this crap right the first time, and you still failed me! That's _bullshit_!"

I held up the scroll and pushed a bit of chakra into it, releasing the kunai pouch, the box, and the hastily rewrapped package. The items clattered to the floor along with the dropped scroll as I crossed my arms and stared at them challengingly. "I chose the scroll because it could carry everything else, just like last time! Now tell me I'm wrong! I _dare _you!"

The examiner looked at the small mess on the floor of the room, then back up at me. "You have made the correct choice," he said calmly. "A ninja must be prepared for any eventuality, which is best symbolized by the storage scroll. However, just like the scroll is of little use without first placing something inside of it, so too must a ninja gain knowledge and experience in many fields.

"Bringing the scroll alone shows planning but lacks preparation. Bringing any of the other items demonstrates preparation but betrays a lack of planning. Bringing all of the items shows both preparation and planning, as well as requiring a measure of cunning and an ability to look beyond what you are told to see the possibilities that remain."

I slowly relaxed as the examiner spoke, some of my anger fading away. When he put it like that, _maybe_ I could see that I hadn't exactly gotten it right the last time either. But I was close!

The two examiners made more notes and conferred quietly for a few seconds before they looked up at me. "You have passed the second test," one of them said, smiling. "Your choice and reasoning places you as category one, and you passed with a score of eight out of ten."

I perked up at that. "What does that category thing mean?"

"Not a whole lot, honestly," the ninja told me. "It just indicates the type of solution you came up with. Category one says that your answer focused on deception."

"What would category two mean then?" I asked curiously, remembering Sasuke's score. Which was a seven, not an eight! Ha, take that! I beat him on two different tests!

"Category two would indicate that you were more aggressive in your approach - for instance, just blatantly taking all of the items, rather than finding a way to sneak them in."

"You can do that?"

The ninja shrugged. "There are many different ways to pass, including taking none of the items at all. The important part is your explanation for the choice you made."

My face screwed up as I tried to figure out how that would work.

"Don't worry about it," the ninja said. "You've still got one more test to go: mission simulation."

I shook off my thoughts and focused on the examiner again. "Bring it on!" I told him, crossing my arms and nodding firmly.

He grinned at me for a moment before adopting a serious expression. "The mission is the same as in the previous exam. Your group has successfully infiltrated enemy territory and you are currently approaching the designated meeting place. State your orders."

Holy crap, they didn't waste time, did they?

"Is there a time limit or something?"

"Not at this time, no," the examiner replied. "You will be informed if and when questions require an immediate response."

"Right. Good. Um..." I trailed off, trying to think of what to do. This was kinda like the stuff Shika was doing, although it sounded like this one would last a while. "Who's in charge of scouting?"

The examiner made a note on the scroll in front of him. "You are the leader of this mission and have designated one or more people for that role."

Well that didn't help at all. I thought for a second, trying to wrap my head around the situation, but I wasn't getting anywhere and I could tell they were waiting on my answer. They said it wasn't timed, but what if taking too long hurt my score and caused me to fail anyway? What if-

Focus! The Thinking Pose was working pretty good so far, so I'd go with that again. My hands formed a circle as I sat back on my heels again, my eyes closed as I thought.

Right, so, I'm in charge. Check. I don't have Hinata on the team, or Hanabi for that matter, so no Byakugan for a kickass scout. The other people didn't have any special... anything, really, but I guess the point was that they'd be kinda ok at whatever they did. So I could send somebody on the team out to scout, maybe two or even all three of them, or...

My eyes popped open. "I'm in charge of scouting. I've got my clones out looking around and keeping an eye out. I send out some more to check out the meeting place before we head in ourselves."

"Your... _clones_?" the examiner asked, his eyes narrowed. The other examiner leaned over and spoke to him for a moment.

"You're _shitting_ me," the examiner blurted out, his head whipping over to stare at his fellow ninja in shock. The other ninja just nodded firmly. The examiner paused a moment, then cleared his throat and turned back to me.

"Right. Your clones. Ok," the examiner closed his eyes for a moment. When he reopened them, his face was calm and serious again. "Your clones report back and tell you that the meeting site is clear; no sign of enemy ninja, but no sign of the ninja you're looking for either. State your orders."

The examiner kept asking questions as I made more decisions, taking my team from the meeting site to the last known location of the missing team. I found them half a day later, injured and holed up in a isolated location as they tried to heal. The medical supplies I'd snuck in definitely came in handy there, and we got the other team all patched up. One of them was too injured to move on his own, but everybody else was good to go.

"Your clones report back, telling you that they have engaged a group of at least ten strong enemy ninja who appeared to be tracking something. Your clones are delaying them, but were dropping fast. Based on their report, you have roughly five minutes before the ninja discover your location. You have three minutes to state your orders, starting now."

I groaned, rubbing my hand through my hair. My head was starting to hurt trying to keep all of this straight, and now it had just gotten really complicated. I also knew that, if this was a real situation, the faster I came up with an answer the better.

"Troublesome... troublesome..." I chanted, trying to clear my head and focus.

Ok, the point of the mission was still to get everybody back to Konoha, but we might have to fight our way out now. They had _at least _ten ninja, and the examiner said they were chewing through my clones like they were nothing. On my side, I had me, three "average" ninja, three injured ninja and another one we would have to carry out.

My brow furrowed. This sounded really familiar... in fact...

I looked up, a large grin growing on my face. I knew _exactly _what to do.

"I start creating a large number of clones and splitting them into groups of eight..."

~ Scene Break ~

"Very well, Uzumaki-san, that is the end of this test. We need to confer about your results, so if you will step into the next room to wait we will be there shortly."

Now that the test was actually over, I felt all of the tension I'd been ignoring and shoving aside come flooding back all at once. I managed and nod and walked stiffly through the door, finding a small room with some scattered chairs and a couple of tables. I dropped into one of the chairs, but a few seconds later I was back on my feet and pacing around the room.

"I passed, right?" I muttered to myself. "I mean, they didn't say I failed and I got through all three tests, right? I even had better scores than Sasuke, so that's gotta count, right?"

I kept that up for a few minutes, continually pacing back and forth through the room before the door finally opened. I whirled around to find Iruka-sensei walking into the room, a small scroll held in his hand.

I sagged slightly when I realized it wasn't the examiners, but then perked up again and bounced over to Iruka-sensei.

"Hey, Iruka-sensei!" I said, waving and grinning at him. "What're you doin' here?"

He smiled at me, his hand coming up to scratch at the long scar across his nose.

"I heard you were taking the promotion test today and wanted to stop by and see how you were doing. How'd it go?"

"I kicked ass!" I told him, grinning. "I got through the combat part no problem, and I figured out that stupid scroll trick this time, and I totally rescued the ninja in that fake mission thing! Well," I faltered slightly, frowning, "I _think _I did. I told them my plan to get out and then they told me the test was over, so now I'm just waiting."

"I see," Iruka nodded, trying to put on a serious face while fighting a smile. "Well, I think I can help with part of that."

He handed me the scroll he was carrying and I unrolled it, reading over it quickly.

_Naruto Uzumaki – Chuunin Promotion Test Results_

_Combat: Offense – 8; Defense – 10; Awareness – 6; Overall – 8; PASS_

_Preparation and Planning: Category I; 8/10; PASS_

_Mission Simulation: Mission Successful; Zero Casualties; 8/10; PASS_

I looked back up at Iruka-sensei to find him grinning at me, his face shining with pride.

"Congratulations, Naruto! You passed! I knew you could do it!" he told me.

My grin was so wide it actually hurt.

~ Scene Break ~

The words showed up as soon as I set foot back in the Mission Room, still adjusting my shiny new Chuunin flak vest.

**Congratulations! Naruto Uzumaki has been promoted to chuunin!**

**The Recruitment Limit has been increased. You may now recruit three additional ninja! You must achieve the rank of jounin to increase this limit further.**

**Additional missions are now available in the Mission Room!**

**Additional challenges are now available in the Forest of Death!**

**Achievement Unlocked: One Step Closer (10)**

The others gathered around, smiling and clapping me on the back and congratulating me on passing. Well, most of them.

"About time, _dobe_," Sasuke grunted, his arms crossed and a small smirk on his face. His smirk faltered when I didn't immediately respond, instead meeting his grin with one of my own and waving the scroll Iruka-sensei had given me in the air.

"Guess what, Sasuke?" I said, my grin turning positively feral. "I scored better than you did! Take that!"

His eyes widened and he stepped forward to grab the scroll out of my hands, unrolling it quickly and scanning over it. His expression soured for a moment before he scoffed and tossed the scroll back to me.

"Like it really means anything," he muttered. A smug grin formed on his lips. "We both know-"

"_Anyway_," Shika cut in abruptly before Sasuke could finish whatever he was going to say. "That makes three chuunin now, and Chouji, Hinata, and Hanabi are only one mission away from being ready for promotion themselves."

"Which would make me the youngest chuunin by far," Hanabi commented idly. "Rather makes both of you look a little... _slow_, doesn't it?"

Sasuke broke off his staring contest with me to glare at Hanabi, and I shot her an annoyed look of my own. I was half-tempted to pick up that Fleet of Foot thing just to surprise her the next time she tried to use that in a spar.

"So who should we recruit next?" Chouji asked, turning to Shika. "I was thinking-"

"Sakura-chan!" I declared immediately.

"Neji," Sasuke said at the same time.

"Tenten," Shikamaru stated calmly.

"Shi-Shino-kun would..." Hinata started to say before trailing off, her eyes dropping to the floor.

"- Ino," Chouji finished, his eyes wide.

Hanabi remained silent, glancing at the rest of us curiously.

Sasuke reacted first, turning to Shika with a curious expression. "Tenten? The girl on Neji's team? Why her?"

"Our current group has far too much emphasis on melee," Shika explained, shoving his hands into his pockets while his eyes roamed around the Mission Room. "Naruto is the only one with a viable long-ranged attack, and he's been able to put it to devastating use. From what I saw during the preliminaries, Tenten could pull of something similar, if on a smaller scale, and would offer incredible versatility in weapons as well, another area we are sorely lacking."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed in thought for a moment before he shrugged. "She lost handily to that Temari girl despite that, but I suppose you have a point. Neji still offers more raw power and skill, though, but she might make a good second choice."

Shika hummed to himself for a moment before looking over to Hinata. "What were you saying about Shino?"

Hinata finally looked up, her eyes darting over to me and something crossing over her face for a moment before she focused on Shika. "Shi-Shino-kun was the b-best planner on our team, and h-he's a lot stronger than people think," she said quietly. "He can use his _kikaichuu_ at any r-range, too."

"Better than Kiba, that's for sure," Sasuke muttered. "We definitely don't need another loud mouth."

"What about Sakura-chan?" I interrupted, ignoring his comment. "She's just as strong as any of them!"

Sasuke scoffed and shook his head.

"We can only recruit three more people, Naruto," Shika pointed out. "Lee would have been my first choice, actually, given his level of skill and his personality, but he's still stuck in the hospital."

Hinata looked startled, then thoughtful, but didn't say anything.

"We need to think about this carefully," Shikamaru continued after watching Hinata for a moment, "to find the person who can help us out the most and who we can work with the best."

"Work with? And you want to pick _Neji_?" I asked in disbelief, turning to stare at Sasuke. "Have you _met _him?"

"He'd be more useful than _Sakura_," Sasuke replied immediately with another scoff.

"What the hell, Sasuke?" I shouted, throwing my hands up in the air. "In case you forgot, back in Wave she'd already mastered tree walking and water walking before you even started on 'em! She was the one helping me guard Tazuna-jiji while you were just getting started! Who was useful then, huh?"

Sasuke scowled at the reminder, but I wasn't about to back down on this one. "She's the one who saved our asses after Orochimaru got us, remember? No, you don't, 'cause we were _knocked out_! You remember how rough a shape she was in when we woke up? You think she got like that being _useless_?

"Or how about when we were undergoing Crazy Snake Lady's training, huh? While you were off learning the stupid Chidori, we were working our asses off just surviving that psycho! You think she did that being _useless_?

"That shouldn't matter, though! Sakura's on our _team_, and you're gonna stand there and talk about her like that? Seriously, what the hell's wrong with you?"

I was shouting by the end of it, and was panting slightly when I finally ran out of steam. Sometimes I thought maybe Sasuke was kinda ok, but then he pulled crap like that and reminded me that he really was a bastard. And _he _was the one who Sakura- my scowl darkened as I cut that thought short.

Sasuke had an odd look on his face, part anger and part something else I couldn't quite place. He didn't say anything, though, finally looking away with a sour expression.

I slowly became aware that it was very quiet, and finally looked around to find that everyone in the Mission Room, from Shika and the others to the ninja sitting at the desks and even the few clients who were arranging missions were staring at us. At me.

I scowled and stalked out of the room, only vaguely aware that the others were trailing after me.

Forget Sasuke, dammit. I'd just made chuunin, and I wasn't going to let his bastardness ruin my mood.

I felt a grin forming on my lips as I ran that thought through my head again. Chuunin Naruto Uzumaki. Naruto Uzumaki, Chuunin of Konoha.

This called for ramen!

~ Scene Break ~

"Old man!" I called out as I swept aside the curtain and stepped up to the bar at Ichiraku's, proudly wearing my shiny new chuunin flak vest. "Two Ramen Specials for Konoha's newest chuunin!"

Teuchi glanced up from the bowl he was wiping, the welcoming smile on his face quickly growing into a wide grin. "Well, what do you know?" he chuckled. "It seems like you just became a genin yesterday, and here you are a chuunin already! Congratulations, Naruto!"

I beamed at him as I plopped down onto one of the stools, adjusting my shiny new chuunin flak vest again.

"Is that Naruto?" I heard from the back. Ayame stepped out, wiping her hands on her apron. When she caught sight of me and my shiny new chuunin flak vest, she let out a happy squeal and darted around the counter to pull me into a hug.

"Congratulations, Naruto-kun!" she proclaimed, her hands tightening around me for a moment before she let me drop back onto the stool. "When did this happen?"

"About half an hour ago," I told her, still grinning. "There's this whole crazy hard test you have to go through - three of 'em! - but that didn't stop me! For the first one, I-"

I was interrupted by the arrival of the others in the group, all of them filing in and sitting down at the counter. Ayame smiled at me apologetically before moving back behind the counter and welcoming everyone else. Shika and Chouji sat to my left, Shika laying his head down on the bar and looking like he was about to fall asleep while Chouji inhaled deeply and licked his lips. Hinata hesitated for a moment before slowly settling down onto the stool on my right, while Hanabi sat beside her and Sasuke-teme dropped onto the stool at the far end, brooding silently.

"Welcome to Ichiraku's!" Ayame said, smiling. "What can I get for you?" she asked, starting with Shika and working her way down the line. By the time she got to Sasuke the old man had my first bowl of ramen ready.

"A bowl on the house for Konoha's newest and best chuunin!" he said as he placed it in front of me.

"Awesome!" I cheered before digging in with gusto.

Chouji and I discussed the many virtues of ramen while Shika pretended to take a nap. Hinata spent her time either being really quiet or talking to her sister, and Sasuke-teme just sat on the end and brooded while ignoring Hanabi's attempts to get his attention.

About the time I was finishing off my fourth bowl, Shika finally sat up on his stool.

"It's troublesome, but we still need to figure out what we're going to do about the next recruits," he began. "Tenten, Sakura, Ino, Shino, and Neji were all mentioned, but we only have three spots right now. If we-"

"U-um," Hinata interrupted, drawing everyone's attention. She ducked her head for a moment before drawing in a deep breath and pushing ahead. "You al-also mentioned Lee-san," she pointed out.

Shika nodded, his eyes studying Hinata curiously. "I did, yeah. From both a personality and a skill perspective I think he would be a powerful asset, but he's still recovering from his surgery." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, his eyes narrowing. "I _suppose _we could wait, but we're not sure how long his recovery will be or if we might end up accidentally recruiting someone while we do so. Both Hanabi and Sasuke were recruited without a conscious effort on our part, after all.

"Wh-what if I tr-tried to heal him?" she asked.

Shika stared at her for a moment before his eyes shot wide open. "You think that will work?" he asked intently, leaning forward in his seat.

Hinata nodded slowly. "I th-think so," she said. "I don't know much about me-medical jutsu, but First Aid seems to work on e-everything."

"You mean, you can fix Bushy Brows _now_?" I asked, staring at Hinata wide-eyed.

She nodded, her eyes darting around Ichiraku's as her face turned a little red.

"Well what are we waiting for?"

~ Scene Break ~

I bounced into Bushy Brow's hospital room, a wide smile on my face.

"Naruto-kun!" Lee called out, smiling and waving from his spot near the window. He was propped up on crutches and moving slowly, but he also looked _much _happier than he had the last time I'd seen him.

"Bushy Brow!" I cheered as I stopped next to him. "It's great to see you looking better!"

His face lit up as he nodded enthusiastically. "Tsunade-sama's Flames of Youth are unparalleled! Her surgery was completely successful, and she tells me that I will make a complete recovery!" His face fell slightly. "But she insists that I cannot resume my training until she declares me fit for duty," he added sadly. "And Gai-sensei insists that training my will by following the Hokage's orders to the letter is yet another challenge that will fan the flames of my Youth."

I blinked for a second, trying to follow that and not quite managing it.

In the meantime, Lee looked past me and waved to the rest of the group. Hinata slowly made her way to the front, smiling nervously.

"Um, Lee-san," she said quietly. "I-if it's ok with you, I'd like to try something that w-will help you recover faster."

"Do... can you really?" he asked hopefully. He swallowed and glanced around nervously for a moment. "I'm trying to use this as training like Gai-sensei said, but I really really want to get back to training soon."

Hinata nodded a little more certainly this time.

"Yosh!" he cried, standing straighter. "Your Flames of Youth burn brightly, Hinata-san! I'll do whatever you need me to do!"

I stepped back as Hinata moved closer. I felt really bad for Bushy Brow, getting hurt because of Gaara and everything, and I definitely wanted this to work. Hinata was awesome, though, and I'd seen for myself just how fast her First Aid thing worked.

"F-first aid," Hinata said, holding her hands out towards Bushy Brow. There was a small flare of green light that quickly faded.

Lee looked a little confused, but then turned thoughtful as he looked down at himself.

"I... I do feel better, Hinata-san!" he said, looking a little disappointed but still smiling. He'd obviously been hoping for something more.

"First aid," Hinata repeated, her face hardening and looking more determined. "First aid. First aid. First aid."

Four more flashes of green light appeared and faded. By the time the last was gone, Lee's jaw was slack as he stared down at himself, stunned.

He slowly raised one hand in front of himself and clenched it into a fist. He looked like he was bracing for something, but his face lit up instead. The crutches clattered to the ground as he stepped forward, both arms up and hands flexing. His torso twisted left and right, then one fist jabbed out with an audible pop.

Bushy Brow's entire face lit up as he turned to stare at Hinata in awe. "You... you..." he darted forward, picking her up and twirling her around as he laughed out loud. "Your Youth knows no bounds!" he declared as he put her down. She stepped back quickly, glancing at me for some reason before she turned back to Lee and smiled happily.

"Congrats, Lee!" Chouji called out, walking up to slap Lee on the back.

"Chouji-kun!" Lee declared as he picked up _Chouji _and twirled him around. He dropped the stunned Akimichi before darting towards Shika and doing the same thing.

"Troublesome..." Shika muttered, though he was smiling as he did so.

"Sasuke-kun!" Lee cried out. Sasuke's eyes widened before he blurred out of the way and pulled someone else into Bushy Brow's path. Hanabi's indignant shout was muffled by Lee's cry of "Hanabi-chan!"

I laughed at Sasuke's reaction before I stopped abruptly when Lee turned in my direction.

"Wait a-"

"Naruto-kun!"

Holy _crap _is he fast.

~ End Chapter ~

**A/N: As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**

**Thanks to the folks on the SB forums for providing feedback!**


	14. LIfe Seven: Clash of Ninjas

"All agreed?"

"Yeah!"

"Hn."

"Y-yes."

"Sure."

"It's fine."

Shikamaru nodded quietly as he looked at each of us in turn. "Alright, then we will recruit Lee first."

"Great! I'll go and-"

"Hold on, Naruto," he interrupted quickly. "I think we should go ahead and settle who the other two recruits will be."

I slowly settled back into my chair, pouting slightly as I looked around the kitchen to take in everyone else's reactions.

Sasuke perked up slightly from where he was leaning on the counter next to Hanabi, a slight gleam in his eye and a smirk on his face as he crossed his arms. Hanabi, once more sitting on top of the counter with her legs crossed, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees and her chin propped on her hands, only looked vaguely interested.

Most of Chouji's attention was focused on Shikamaru, and he had a slight frown on his face - why, I wasn't really sure. Hinata was smiling, and seemed to be sitting up straighter in her chair than before.

Shikamaru was watching all of us, his eyes sharp. His gaze lingered on me longer than the others, and on Sasuke most of all. He drew in a deep breath, his eyes closing for a moment before he spoke.

"Once Lee has been brought into this, Naruto will be able to recruit two more people. Each of us has named different people we would like to see recruited, each for our own reasons. We all agreed that we liked Lee personally, that we could work with him on missions, and that he would be a powerful asset to our group moving forward. I would like us to reach a similar agreement about the others before we leave here today."

He turned to look at me. "Does that sound good?" he asked, his voice pitched so that he was speaking to everyone even as he maintained eye contact.

"Yeah," I replied, nodding, quickly followed by the others.

"Alright. Of the people mentioned, I think we can eliminate one of them now... does anyone here think that they can work with Neji's personality, or that he provides abilities or skills that we sorely need?"

No one said anything; even Sasuke, who had brought him up in the first place, remained silent.

Shika nodded again. "So Neji is out. That leaves Shino, Sakura, Ino and Tenten. Naruto and Sasuke have already debated Sakura's strengths and weaknesses at length, so let's move on to Tenten.

"She has a year of experience over everyone here, is skilled in several weapons, and favors a long-range attack style. She is on a team with Lee, which would make including both of them in our planning easier and allows us to build on their existing teamwork rather than starting completely from scratch. She, along with Lee, also represents a connection to other segments of Konoha, since they have had time to get to know other ninja that we haven't been exposed to yet.

"Ino, as troublesome as she can be, is a good kunoichi in her own right, even if she can't quite match up to Tenten yet. She also has access to the Yamanaka clan techniques, which could be a powerful asset in our efforts - especially if there is an ability set that supplements them, like with my shadow techniques or Naruto's clones. She's also on the same team as Chouji and I, which would give us a full team recruited into this. The logistics of assigning missions hasn't been an issue so far, however, so that may not actually gain us anything in and of itself.

"Which leaves us with Shino, who was recommended by Hinata. He's very quiet and unassuming, and even knowing intellectually how well he did in the Academy I am guilty of overlooking him myself. However, I've thought it over and have to agree that he would be a great addition to our group. He scored in the upper ranks across the board in the Academy, and his clan techniques using the _kikaichuu _are very flexible. Hearing Hinata's assessment based on their time in Team Kurenai, those skills have translated into the real world as well."

He finished his speech and leaned back in his chair, scanning the gathered group once again. "Thoughts?" he asked finally.

"You brought up unique skills," Sasuke said immediately, uncrossing his arms and stepping away from the counter as he motioned to each of us in turn, "We have taijutsu more than covered - you are the only one who doesn't have a good chunk invested in hand-to-hand. You have ninjutsu, with Naruto, Chouji, and myself. Since kenjutsu apparently counts as a separate skill, that definitely means Tenten will have all of us beat in that area. What about fuinjutsu or genjutsu?"

"Didn't Tenten use those scroll things when she was fighting Temari?" I asked. "Isn't that like fuinjutsu?"

"It's not _like _fuinjutsu," Hanabi scoffed. "That _is _fuinjutsu. Storage scrolls are about as basic as fuinjutsu gets, but even they take real skill not to screw up completely. The Hyuuga only have four members who are good enough to make sealing scrolls reliably, and Father never lets all of them go out on missions at the same time."

Sasuke grunted, crossing his arms again. "What about genjutsu then?"

"K-Kurenai-sensei is one of the b-best genjutsu users in the village," Hinata spoke up. "No one on our t-team specializes in it, but she still taught us a lot a-about how it works."

"We need somebody our age who can use it, though, right?" Chouji asked. "I don't remember anybody from the Academy who was really good at genjutsu..."

The rest of the group was silent, and I kept racking my brain trying to come up with anybody who I'd seen actually use genjutsu for real. Heck, even in the Academy they had to get somebody to come in just for that class - Kura-something or other, I think his name was.

"I don't believe that we'll find anyone we can recruit who already has significant skill in genjutsu," Shika said after a few seconds of silence. "We'd have heard something about them by now if there was someone with unusually high skill in genjutsu in our age group."

"So we'll have to find someone who can specialize in it from now on, then," Sasuke noted.

Shika eyes narrowed slightly as he stared at Sasuke, and I saw that Chouji was frowning again. I looked back and forth, trying to figure out what the deal was, but Shika just shrugged after a moment and looked away.

"Any other thoughts?" he asked, once more looking around the group.

I leaned back in my chair, thinking about all the stuff that Shika had said. I wanted Sakura to be one of the two picked, of course, but I didn't have any real problems with the rest of them, even if Ino was kind of annoying when she started arguing with Sakura about Sasuke.

I grimaced, recalling some of their louder arguments on that topic. I could _definitely _do without more of that. Maybe Tenten or Shino would be a better choice. Tenten hadn't even looked twice at Sasuke, and Shino was... well, he was quiet, that was for sure.

"Alright," Shika said when nobody spoke up, "the fairest way I can think of to do this is to just vote, assuming no one has any other ideas." Everyone shook their heads, and he pulled out one of my notepads and a pencil and started writing quickly, filling out names and drawing lines. "I'll go around to each of you in turn, and you just name the two people you want to recruit. If one person gets a majority of the votes, they're in. We'll keep going until we've got two people, or we get stuck... in which case we'll figure something out.

"Ok, first up, Hinata."

"Shino and Tenten," she declared firmly, her gaze fixed on the sheet of paper in front of Shika. He nodded, making two marks on the paper.

"Hanabi," he said next, glancing over to where the girl was sitting on the counter.

"Shino and Tenten," she replied, shrugging.

"Sasuke."

"Tenten and Sakura," he said. I looked up at him, grinning widely. Obviously you _could _beat some sense into that stupid head of his after all!

Shika took a little longer to write down those two votes. "Chouji."

"Ino and Tenten."

"Naruto."

"Sakura and..." I trailed off, still uncertain as to whether I should vote for Tenten or Shino. Shika looked up, mouth opening as if to say something before he snapped it shut with a small grimace. I thought back over what had been said earlier, and what I had seen personally. My Kunai Kage Bunshin had come in really handy several times now, and Tenten could do something similar. Shino had helped out during the attack and all, but I hadn't really seen him do anything that other people couldn't do just as easily. Tenten was the only one who had anything close to that besides me.

"Tenten, I guess," I said after a moment.

Shika sighed to himself as he made two more marks on the paper. He studied it for a moment before making two more marks and saying, "Tenten and Ino."

I started to count up the votes in my head, trying to remember who had said what, but Shika continued before I'd gotten it all added up. "Tenten has six votes, so she's in. Shino, Sakura, and Ino all have two votes, so we'll have to do another round with all of them. We each only get one vote this time."

He marked off another section of the paper and filled in names before looking up at Hinata.

"Shino," Hinata said again. Shika nodded and marked down her vote.

"Hanabi?"

"Shino."

"Sasuke?"

"Sakura."

"Naruto?"

"Sakura."

He didn't call the next name immediately, instead looking over at Chouji. They stared at each for several seconds, their faces subtly shifting before Shika cocked his head slightly and Chouji sighed and nodded.

"Shino," Chouji called out finally.

"And I vote for Shino as well," Shika said next, making two marks on the paper. "Which gives Shino four votes and Sakura two. Which means Shino gets the last spot," Shika said, slouching forward in his chair and letting his head rest on the table.

I started to nod before my head jerked up. "But that means that Sakura-chan isn't-" I yelled, jumping to my feet.

Shika looked up, his expression faintly apologetic. "We only had two slots, and the group as a whole voted on who to invite. I'm sure she'll make it in the next time."

"But-" I faltered, looking around the room. Sasuke looked annoyed that Sakura didn't make it, but nobody else seemed all that upset. Hanabi was just watching me curiously, Hinata was staring at her hands.

"Ino didn't make it either, Naruto," Chouji pointed out sympathetically.

"Well, yeah, but..." But there wasn't really anything I could say to that, I guess.

This sucked.

"Now that we've decided who to recruit," Shika said, pulling the room's attention back, "I think we should get our newest team members as soon as possible, then figure out what we're going to do from there." He pushed himself to his feet and moved towards the hallway, his hands shoved into his pockets.

Hanabi hopped off the counter and fell into step with Hinata as they made their way out of the apartment. Chouji moved next to Shika, a thoughtful expression on his face. Sasuke let out a low grunt as he stepped away from the counter, stopping next to my chair for a moment. His eyes flickered to Shika, and he grunted again before stalking out of the room.

"You coming, Naruto?" Shika asked.

"Yeah, I'm comin'," I grumbled, climbing to my feet.

~ Scene Break ~

It took most of the walk to the hospital to shake off the bad news. Even if Sakura-chan wasn't going to get recruited right away, that didn't mean she couldn't get in next time, after all. All I had to do was make it to jounin - which I was totally going to kick ass at, no question - and then there'd be another spot and there was _no way _Sakura-chan wouldn't make it next time! Believe it!

I threw open the door to Lee's room, feeling much better.

"Lee!" I called out, grinning widely. "Great- erk."

I jerked to a halt, causing Sasuke to walk into me and then bounce back into the person behind him. I teetered on the edge of falling over for a moment before I got my balance again and looked back at the reason I had stopped in the first place.

Tsunade-baa-chan stood next to Lee's bed, a dark scowl on her face and her hands glowing green as she swept them over Lee's body. Bushy Brow the Elder hovered nearby, a broad grin on his face as he kept shooting a thumbs up to Lee. Shizune was across from Tsunade, rapidly taking notes and keeping up a fast conversation with Tsunade that I could barely understand a word of.

"Naruto-kun!" Lee cheered, craning his head to look past the two kunoichi hovering over him and waving at me energetically. "I was just explaining to Hokage-sama how the most youthful Hinata-chan had used her technique to heal me!"

Tsunade's head jerked up, her eyes sweeping through the group before focusing over my shoulder. "Hinata Hyuuga!" she growled, causing Hinata to let out a small, frightened squeak. "Front and center!"

"Hey!" I yelled back, moving to stand between the Hokage and Hinata. "She didn't do anything wro-"

"I," Tsunade snapped, pinning me to the floor with a glare and causing the words to stick in my throat, "am not _talking_ to _you_. Be _silent_." She kept up the glare for a moment as she stalked around the bed, then shifted her gaze back to Hinata.

"Hinata Hyuuga. Get over here. _Now_." She jabbed her finger to point at the floor directly in front of her.

Hinata was trembling as she moved around me to stand before the Hokage. Tsunade's eyes narrowed as she studied her for several seconds, her arms hanging at her sides and her hands curled into loose fists.

"I performed the surgery on Lee _personally_," Tsunade began, her voice low and menacing, "and have followed his recovery closely to make sure there were no complications or unexpected side effects. I had his recovery mapped out to the _hour._ So imagine my surprise when one of my nurses sends a message telling me my patient is running around and exerting himself against my direct orders.

"I came down here ready to beat some sense into an overactive genin's head," she growled, jerking her thumb over her shoulder at Lee, "only to see that he had recovered far, far more than he should have and hear an _incredible_ story about a genin making up for weeks of recovery time in a matter of minutes. A genin who used an unknown, _unproven_ technique on one of _my _patients."

She shifted her stance, looming over Hinata as she barked her last words.

"Well? What do you have to say for yourself?"

I could see Hinata's entire body shaking and her mouth working, but she couldn't choke out a single word.

"I don't approve of my ninja experimenting on one another, Hyuuga. That kind of reckless disregard for safety and morality is something I would expect from _Orochimaru_, not an upstanding kunoichi of my village. Just because you didn't care if he lived or died is no excuse to-"

"No!" Hinata finally yelped. "I didn't- I would _never_! I knew it would work! I just- I just wanted to help!"

Tsunade's eyes narrowed even further, studying Hinata's form intensely as everyone in the room held their breath. Finally, she slowly relaxed, her scowl softening and the oppressive aura in the room easing considerably.

"I believe you," she said at last. "Which is good for you, since we would be having a _very _different discussion if I did not. It's also good for you that I can't find anything wrong with Lee - whatever you used did its job well."

She grinned then, clapping her hands sharply as an eager look appeared on her face. "Which is why you and I are going to have a nice, long talk about exactly what it was you did, and how."

Hinata sagged in relief, drawing in a shaky breath while Tsunade turned back to Lee and Gai. "Lee, I expect you to return every day for the next week for a checkup. If I find you've managed to hurt yourself again, I will shove you right back in that bed personally."

Lee's eyes widened. "You mean...?"

"Yeah, yeah, you're free to go," Tsunade said, waving off his gratitude.

"Lee!" Gai called out.

"Gai-sensei!" Lee cried.

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"As for the rest of you...," Tsunade muttered, turning her back on the two ninja and looking over the rest of us, "the Hyuuga is coming with me. The rest of you can do whatever it was you were doing before," she added dismissively.

That said, she half-dragged Hinata out of the room, Shizune trailing behind and looking every bit as eager as the Hokage.

I watched them disappear down the hall, Hinata shooting a harried look back in our direction before she vanished out of sight.

"Is Nee-chan going to be alright?" Hanabi asked uncertainly.

"Hn," Sasuke scoffed. "The Hokage was just testing her. She seemed a lot more interested in how Hinata's First Aid worked than anything else."

"I thought so, too," Shika agreed thoughtfully. "We'll have to ask Hinata how that went once she gets back. In the meantime...," he said, turning to look at me.

What was he looking at me for...? Oh! Right.

"Lee!" I called out again, turning to look inside the room.

"... and if I can't do that, I will climb the Hokage Monument with both hands tied behind my back one hundred times! And if I can't do that..."

"Lee!" I tried again, finally catching his attention.

"Naruto-kun! Did you hear the news! Hokage-sama finally let me out of the hospital!"

"Yep!" I nodded, grinning widely at his enthusiasm. "In fact, now that you're out, how would you like to help us out with a few things?"

"Yosh!" Lee cheered, punching one hand into the air. "Anything for my most youthful friends!"

**Lee Rock has been recruited! (Two recruitment slots remaining.)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Yosh! (20)**

~ Scene Break ~

"Tenten!" Lee shouted as he broke away from the group and charged into the training ground.

The girl in question let out a yelp and jumped in the air, whirling around with the kunai she had been practicing with raised to throw. She only just stopped herself from launching the weapon at her teammate as she recognized him.

"Lee?" she gasped, her face a mixture of shock and confusion.

"Tenten!" Lee called out again, nearly tackling her as he wrapped his arms around her and twirled her around in the air much like he had the rest of the group earlier.

"At least it wasn't just us," I muttered, getting murmurs of agreement from the others.

"Lee! What- I thought you were still in the hospital!"

"No more, my most youthful teammate! Hinata-chan greatly sped up my recovery, and the Hokage herself has given me approval to resume training!"

"That's... that's great!" Tenten said after she absorbed the news. She returned Lee's hug, squeezing him tightly before stepping back to take a better look at him. "You're really all better now?"

"Better than ever, Tenten-chan!" Lee replied, pumping his fist in the air. "In fact, Naruto-kun and his friends have even arranged a new training regimen to push the Flames of our Youth to new heights!"

I stumbled slightly as I was making my way over to them, shaking my head at how Lee had phrased that. He hadn't gotten all the details about what exactly he had gotten into just yet, but... well, I guess "training regimen" wasn't _that _far off.

"Yosh!" Gai called out, grinning widely. "When I realized that Naruto-kun's training was what had allowed Hinata-san to learn the techniques that healed Lee, I couldn't help but give it my full support!" he announced. He sniffed then, wiping one arm over his eyes theatrically. "Indeed, I am envious of my precious student, that he can take part where I cannot!"

"Gai-sensei!" Lee cried, looking at his teacher with wide eyes. "I swear I will train enough for the both of us, and be prepared to share the knowledge I gain!"

"Lee!" Gai cried. "Truly, the Flames of your Youth burn brightly!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

I turned away as the two of them got caught up in their competing shouts and turned to look at Tenten, who was watching them while half smiling and half cringing.

"I didn't realize just how much I missed the quiet until just now," she commented, turning to look at the rest of us. "Still, it's really great that Lee is up and about. He tried to hide it, but he was really scared there for awhile," Tenten admitted, relieved. "And even with... _that_," she added, motioning to Lee and Gai, "it's good to see Lee back to his old self."

I grinned, nodding. "Yeah, it's just not Bushy Brow if he's not bouncing around yelling about something. You heard him mention that whole training regimen thing, right?" I asked then, growing a little more serious.

Tenten nodded, looking at us curiously. "Yeah. What's that all about, anyway?"

"Well, it's more than just training, really. It's sort of a, uh, special group within Konoha. We, uh," I trailed off, trying to come up with a way to explain what was going on without coming right out and saying it.

"We are part of a trial team and mission allocation system using an experimental command structure and member composition," Shika supplied.

"Yeah, that!" I said, pointing at him. "What he said!"

Tenten's eyebrows shot up as she scanned the group, lingering on Hanabi for a moment. She looked a little skeptical, but also interested. "Gai-sensei has already said it's ok or Lee wouldn't have done it," she noted. "Tell me more."

**Tenten Higurashi has been recruited! (One recruitment slot remaining.)**

**Achievement Unlocked: DakkaDakkaDakkaDakka (20)**

~ Scene Break ~

"It's not like I don't like Lee, or Shino, or Tenten, but what's wrong with Sakura, huh?" I proclaimed, gesturing wildly with my chopsticks.

"Has he been drinking?" I heard Teuchi-jiji ask Ayame, but I ignored that.

"I mean, sure, Lee is better at taijutsu than anybody I've ever seen, and Tenten had that really awesome trick with all the weapons, and Shino kicked butt during the Chuunin Exams! They're all great!

"But so is Sakura, dammit! She really kicked ass while we were training with Crazy Sna- I mean, Anko-sama," I hastily corrected myself, glancing around nervously to make sure she hadn't managed to sneak up on me again before continuing, "and she totally took out Chouji without breaking a sweat! Even Sasuke finally got his head out of his butt about her when it came time to vote!"

I paused for a moment, slurping down the last bit of ramen in my current bowl and placing it back down on the counter with a loud sigh of contentment. Ayame wordlessly slid another bowl in front of me, and I smiled at her in thanks.

Recruiting Lee and Tenten had gone without a hitch, but Shino was another matter. It turned out that he wasn't at home or at the training grounds where his team normally practiced and, without Hinata there, no one knew where else to look for him. We'd eventually decided to split up and check all over Konoha to try and track him down. They'd even had me send out some shadow clones while I stayed put at Ichiraku's so that everyone knew where to find me if they did track down Shino.

Take part in the search _and _get to eat ramen? Just another reason why shadow clones were the best jutsu ever, as far as I was concerned.

On the other hand, without something to focus on, my mind was drawn back to the fact that Sakura wasn't going to get recruited right away. I mean, yeah, I knew that _eventually _I'd get the chance, but it had dawned on me that I had no idea how long it would be. I mean, it took _forever _to get to chuunin! Jounin had to be at least as tough as that, and there were all those missions and stuff I had to do first.

It could be, like, _months_!

I was lost in thought as I focused on my ramen for a bit, so I was startled when Ayame finally spoke up.

"I'm not really sure about everything that goes on with ninja and all that," she began, "but have you considered asking everyone else why they didn't, uh, vote for Sakura?"

Teuchi-jiji nodded in agreement, absently cleaning the bowl he held in his hands. "You should also keep in mind, Naruto, that it may not have been anything against Sakura personally, either. I know she's your teammate, but the other kids who got votes are on somebody else's team, right?"

I frowned and slowly nodded. "Well, Shino is, yeah. And Lee and Tenten are on the same team, too."

"There ya go, then," Teuchi-jiji said, nodding. "Like Ayame said, the best thing to do is just be upfront and ask about it, but you already know at least one good reason why they might have voted for someone other than Sakura."

"I guess..." I sighed, poking at the ramen for a moment before continuing to eat.

"So what was the vote all about, anyway?" Ayame asked.

"Oh! We were, uh..." I scrambled for a moment before settling on an explanation that would make sense and still be at least kinda true. "We've got this, uh, training group going. I kinda started it and I've been inviting people to join, but we can only have so many people before we hit the limit of the... uh, the group," I finished lamely.

"Oh, and everyone in the group gets to vote on who else to add when a spot opens up?"

"Yeah," I nodded.

"Well, I hope next time a spot opens up that Sakura makes it in," Ayame offered, leaning across the counter to pat my shoulder comfortingly. "Still, that sounds like a lot of fun. It's great to see friends hanging out and having a good time. I'm a little jealous, actually," she admitted as she placed another bowl in front of me.

"Jealous?" I asked.

She looked uncomfortable for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, what with work and school and everything I don't have a lot of time to just hang out with friends. It'd be nice to have a group like that to do things with."

"Hey, if you were a ninja I'd definitely vote for you, Ayame-nee-chan!" I declared, trying to cheer her up.

She smiled and laughed. "And if I were a ninja, I'd definitely join," she told me.

**The Ichirakus have been recruited! New items are now available!**

**Achievement Unlocked: The Essentials (10)**

**Achievement Unlocked: Networking 101 (10)**

I choked on the ramen, coughing and spluttering while Ayame looked at me in confusion and Teuchi juggled the bowls he'd been cleaning, almost dropping them.

"What was that?" she asked, concerned.

"Uh..."

"Naruto...," I heard Sasuke growl from behind me, and swiveled in my seat to find my teammate standing there with Shino beside him. "I swear, if you just managed to burn our last recruitment slot on a _ramen chef, _I _will _drag you to the training ground for a spar and-"

"Hey!" I shot back indignantly. "I didn't mean to! I just said if she _was _a ninja that I would totally vote for her! I didn't know she even _could _be recruited! She's not a ninja or anything!"

Sasuke took a step forward, glowering at me. I met his glare with one of my own before something occurred to me.

"Hey! It didn't say anything about the recruiting slots this time!" I said.

Sasuke paused, some of the anger fading from his face as he thought that over. "You're right," he grudgingly admitted. "It didn't." He turned to Shino, who was watching us both calmly, his eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses, his collar covering the lower half of his face, and his hands stuffed in the pockets of his large trenchcoat.

"Is this the purpose for which you have brought me here, Sasuke-san?" Shino asked idly, his head turning slightly back and forth as he studied us.

"No," Sasuke answered shortly. "Like I said before, we've got a special group starting up that we thought you would like to join. It just happens that all the recruitment has to go through Naruto here, for whatever reason."

"I see," Shino said, nodding. "Well then, Naruto-san, for what reason do you wish me to join this group, and why should I accept?"

"Wait, does this mean that I just joined that group too?" Ayame asked, confusion clear in her voice. "I thought this was a ninja thing? And what was with that thing before, that said that we were recruited? Was that one of those ninja illusion things?"

I looked back and forth for a moment, then turned to Ayame first. "Uh, Ayame-nee-chan, I'm not exactly sure what's going on, but I promise I'll explain it as best I can. First I need to talk to Shino, though, to see if he's going to join us too."

Ayame-nee-chan frowned for a moment, then shrugged. "Fine, go ahead. I can wait til you explain everything to both of us, I guess."

"Thanks!" I said, grinning at her for a moment before turning back to Shino.

"Alright. Your name came up because Hinata-chan recommended you for the group. She said you were really good and came up with a lot of good plans and so on, and thought that you could help out the group a lot. I also remember how you helped us out when we were tracking down Gaara during the Chuunin Exams, by dealing with Kankuro so we could keep moving."

Sasuke blinked at that, then turned to look at Shino again, a speculative look in his eyes.

"I see," Shino said, nodding. "It is good to hear that my teammate has a positive opinion of my skills and abilities. However, I still don't understand the purpose of this group."

"Oh, that. Well, we're an, uh, experimental thingy that uh, is structured...," I tried to repeat whatever it was that Shika had rattled off, but couldn't remember how he had phrased it. "Look, it's a group of us that trains together, and are learning all kinds of new and powerful abilities, and we can sort of pick our own missions that we want to go on. We've even gone on missions directly from the Hokage, and kicked ass at it, too!"

Shino remained silent, studying me and looking over at Sasuke who had a smug grin on his face as he nodded in agreement.

"This is the mission that Hinata-san was part of? The one that took her out of the village?"

"Yep! She totally kicked ass, too!" I told him.

"I had wondered why Kurenai-sensei had agreed to such a large deviation from standard operating procedure. This information sheds new light on her decision."

"Right!" I agreed quickly. "So, uh... will you join?"

Shino remained silent for a few seconds, then nodded. "I have observed Hinata-san's growth in strength and skill over the last few weeks. I believe this will also serve to push my own skills forward. I will join."

**Shino Aburame has been recruited! **

**Maximum Ninja Recruitment reached! To recruit more ninja characters, you must first advance in rank!**

Shino's head cocked slightly to the side. "That was an unusual sensation. What was the purpose of that?"

"You guys felt that, too?" Ayame asked. "Thank goodness. I was worried that I was the only one."

"I felt it, too," Teuchi-jiji added. "Whatever that was."

"It did say _ninja _recruits," Sasuke observed thoughtfully, "and they aren't ninja."

"No, seriously," Tenten's voice floated into the ramen stand. "What the hell is that? That is like no genjutsu I've ever heard of!"

"I know not, Tenten-chan!" Lee yelled. "I am certain it will soon be explained, however!"

"We've got everyone together, now," Shikamaru told them as he led them into the stand. Hanabi and Chouji were with them as well, so everyone but Hinata was present. "Although it sounds like Naruto has stumbled across something he needs to share with us as well..."

I laughed nervously as I looked around. Their expressions ranged from annoyed to confused to curious, but all of them were focused on me.

"Right," I said, setting down the ramen bowl and clearing my throat. "It started back during the Chuunin Exams when I got ambushed and woke up here..."

~ Scene Break ~

"Hinata-chan!" I called out as I spotted her ahead of us. The rest of the group, which now included Teuchi-jiji and Ayame-nee-chan, looked over towards her as well as Hanabi ran ahead to meet her.

"Nee-chan, what did Hokage-sama want with you?" she asked quickly, looking over her sister and sounding concerned.

I was a little worried myself, actually. Hinata's hair was plastered to her forehead from where she had been sweating heavily, and she looked a little worn out as she walked down the side of the road.

"Hey, Hanabi-chan," she said distractedly, raising her hand in greeting as she looked over the rest of the group.

Hanabi frowned when Hinata didn't immediately answer. "Nee-chan, is everything ok? Are you in trouble?"

Hinata blinked, looking at Hanabi in confusion for a moment before she shook her head and seemed to wake up a little. "Oh, it's fine, Hanabi-chan. I'm not in trouble. Tsunade-sama just asked me a lot of questions about what I had done to help Lee, then made me demonstrate all the medical techniques I knew. I couldn't actually use First Aid anymore, though, so I had to use Battlefield Surgery instead."

"And then what happened?" Shika asked intently.

"She... well, she got all quiet and sent me away, actually," Hinata admitted, looking a little confused.

"Figures," I muttered while Shika's shoulders drooped.

"But," Hinata added quickly, "she also told me to come back tomorrow for something. I don't know what she wants from me, though..."

"Hold on a second," Tenten said, holding up her hand and staring at Hinata. "Why were you meeting with Tsunade-sama in the first place?"

"Ah, Tenten-chan!" Lee cried, grinning widely. "The most youthful Hinata-chan was the one who healed my injuries and allowed me to return to my training much earlier than expected!"

"Impressive, Hinata-san," Shino said, nodding his head in her direction. It was hard to tell with his collar in the way, but it felt like he was smiling.

"Yeah, she was awesome!" I added.

Hinata smiled and ducked her head, her face turning slightly red as she nodded.

"And Tsunade-sama was asking you about that?" Tenten pressed.

"Y-yes. She wanted to know how my technique worked and h-how I came up with it."

"I see," she said slowly. "Well, it's really great that you helped Lee! Thank you," she finished, bowing slightly.

"O-of course," Hinata replied, reflexively bowing back.

We resumed our trek to my apartment after that and ended up piling into my kitchen. We'd already run out of places to sit with just six of us - with five more, there was barely even room to stand.

"Alright!" I said, standing in front of my fridge and looking around at everyone. "Here's the best proof we've got for all that stuff I was telling you guys before! Well, other than doing a checkpoint thing, I guess, but that would- anyway! Characters!"

As always when I said one of the options listed in the menus, the world turned still and gray and words got shoved into our heads.

**Chouji Akimichi**

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Hinata Hyuuga**

**Lee Rock**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Sasuke Uchiha**

**Shikamaru Nara**

**Shino Aburame**

**Tenten Higurashi**

"That's a little creepy, honestly," Ayame muttered, causing Tenten to nod in agreement.

"Oh, oh! This is amazing, Naruto-kun!" Lee cheered, spinning around rapidly as he tried to look in every direction at once.

Not that there was anything interesting to see in my kitchen, but whatever.

"It gets better!" I told him, grinning as I anticipated his reaction to what was coming next. "Lee Rock."

**Lee Rock – Genin**

**Level: 15 (12)**

**Rating: B**

**Experience Points: 7,491/13,000**

**Teacher: None**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 14 (21)**

**Precision: 4**

**Toughness: 7 (18)**

**Vitality: 9**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: N/A**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: N/A**

**Taijutsu: 182/188 (150)**

**Abilities: **

***Flames Of Youth! (5)**

**Harder (1)**

**Overpower (5)**

***Reckless Fury (5)**

**Traits:**

**Float Like A Butterfly**

**Genjutsu Disabled**

**Iron Fist**

**Juggernaut**

**Ninjutsu Disabled**

**Sting Like A Bee**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

**Taijutsu Specialization**

Sasuke froze, his glass slipping from his limp fingers and shattering on the floor.

Hanabi spluttered incoherently, her eyes huge as she gaped at Lee.

Shikamaru's eyes were wide and his jaw clenched as he swallowed thickly.

Chouji's hand had paused halfway to his mouth, hanging motionless in midair.

Hinata let out a small squeak, her face pale.

Shino's head titled as he observed the rest of the room.

"Yosh! Truly my Flames Of Youth burn brightly indeed, to appear even in this strange place!"

"What? What is it? Is something wrong?" Tenten asked worriedly, her eyes darting around the kitchen.

"O-One..." Hanabi choked out before trailing off.

"There is something unusual about his... character listing?" Shino asked slowly, studying the reactions around him.

Ayame-nee-chan and Teuchi-jii-san stood back in the far corner of my very crowded kitchen, watching silently with curious looks on their faces.

"O-One..." Hanabi began again.

Sasuke started laughing to himself, a low, dark chuckle that caused several people to send him wary looks.

"_One hundred eighty eight_?" Hanabi finally screeched, leaping off of the counter to stalk up to Lee. "What the _hell_ is that? How could you have _possibly_ gotten that much skill already?"

"So... that's a good number, then?" Tenten asked while Lee looked at Hanabi in confusion.

"Very," Shika said flatly, his eyes narrowing as he began thinking rapidly.

"What about mine, then?" Tenten asked, a bit of excitement in her voice.

"Tenten," I muttered dully, still staring at Lee in shock.

**Tenten Higurashi – Genin**

**Level: 15 (12)**

**Rating: C**

**Experience Points: 7,491/13,000**

**Teacher: None**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 9 (11)**

**Precision: 13 (17)**

**Toughness: 4**

**Vitality: 8**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 17/17 (14)**

**Genjutsu: 1/1**

**Kenjutsu: 69/69 (55)**

**Ninjutsu: 1/1**

**Taijutsu: 30/34 (28)**

**Abilities: **

***Backstab (5)**

***Blending In (5)**

***Careful Aim (5)**

**Overpower (1)**

**Traits:**

**Control Thy Enemy**

**Control Thyself**

**Fuinjutsu Affinity**

**Hidden Blade**

**Kenjutsu Affinity**

**Sniper**

**Taijutsu Affinity**

"Oh," Tenten muttered dully. "I... I guess one hundred eighty eight is really good then, yeah."

"You still have more total skill than any of us do," Shika pointed out. "And quite a few traits on top of that."

"What of my listing?" Shino said then, his curiosity clear.

**Shino Aburame – Genin**

**Level: 12**

**Rating: C**

**Experience Points: 7,491/13,000**

**Teacher: None**

**Statistics:**

**Power: 7 (9)**

**Precision: 12 (13)**

**Toughness: 4**

**Vitality: 8 (9)**

**Skills:**

**Fuinjutsu: 1/1**

**Genjutsu: 25/37**

**Kenjutsu: 1/1**

**Ninjutsu: 53/54**

**Taijutsu: 13/13**

**Abilities: **

**Greater Injection (2)**

*** Injection (5)**

*** Mark (5)**

**Traits:**

**Aburame (Bloodline)**

**Ninjutsu Affinity**

**Power Creep**

"What are these trait things?" Tenten asked after we had absorbed Shino's stats, kicking off another long discussion. Fortunately Shika led that one, since I didn't think I'd do all that great a job explaining it myself.

It probably took a solid hour before Tenten and Shino stopped coming up with other questions to ask. Unfortunately, that was the point where Sasuke decided to be a bastard again.

"Why don't you show your character listing, Naruto?" he asked pointedly. "After seeing what Lee and Tenten and Shino have, I have to wonder what it looks like for the person who has been here the longest."

"Uh..." I stuttered, frozen as the others looked on with interest or nodded in agreement. I really didn't want to do that, since my traits would be listed out just like everyone else's, and 'Jinchuuriki' would be sitting right there in the middle of the list for everyone to see. It had turned out alright with Shika, but I still got a sick twisty feeling in my gut whenever I thought about anyone finding out.

"We can deal with that later," Shika said quickly, causing relief to flood through my body. "We have more immediate issues that we need to deal with."

"Like what?" Sasuke asked, his eyes narrowed as he studied Shika.

"Like the fact that Naruto somehow recruited civilians, but they don't show up as characters like ninja do. Or that 'new items' are available, even though we have no idea what they are, what they do, or where to get them."

"I would like to know that myself," Teuchi-jii-san chimed in, his kind voice unusually serious. "I'm happy to help out Naruto-kun and his friends anytime, but I really don't see how I can. Except for making delicious ramen, of course!" he added with a laugh, winking at me.

There was a loud thump that startled me, and I whipped around to find Shika with his forehead resting on the table. He lifted his head for a moment only to let it drop back with another thump. He repeated this several times before he finally looked up at me with an annoyed expression.

"Your inventory," he groaned.

I stared at him in confusion for a moment before I realized what he was asking me to do. "Inventory," I repeated.

**Chouji Akimichi**

**Hanabi Hyuuga**

**Hinata Hyuuga**

**Lee Rock**

**Naruto Uzumaki**

**Sasuke Uchiha**

**Shikamaru Nara**

**Shino Aburame**

**Tenten Higurashi**

"Why are we bothering with this?" Sasuke asked. "It's the most useless part of this entire thing! Who cares what we're currently wearing?"

"Naruto," I said, ignoring Sasuke's whining.

**Naruto Uzumaki currently has:**

**Ryo: 13,790**

**Black Shirt**

**Cup Ramen x99**

**Kunai Pouch x2**

**Orange Jacket**

**Orange Pants**

**Key Item: Chuunin Flak Vest**

**Key Item: Konoha Headband**

"_Ninety-nine_ ramen cups? Really, Naruto?" Sasuke scoffed, shaking his head.

I was going to answer when Shika started banging his head on the table again.

"What? What is it?"

"Cup ramen, details," he muttered.

"Why would I... will that even work?" I asked. He just slouched over and stared at me expectantly, so I shrugged. "Cup ramen, details."

**The most basic ramen imaginable. Despite the filthy lies printed on the label, this ramen is far from instant - a full three minutes plus prep time. With minimal nutritional value, this is best consumed only when no other option is available.**

"Sounds about right," I nodded to myself, mentally translating that to 'when no other ramen is available.'

**May only be used outside of combat.**

The entire room fell silent as they absorbed the implications of that, the quiet only broken by the sound of Shika's head impacting the table again and again.

"You have got to be _kidding_ me," Sasuke burst out. "They were seriously recruited so they could make him _better ramen_?"

"That's awesome!" I cheered, grinning widely. Everyone else, even Ayame-nee-chan and Teuchi-jii-san, stared at me following my outburst.

"I mean..." I floundered for a moment before I shook my head. "No, I was right. That's awesome!"

[Part I - Novice - End]

~ Scene Break ~

**~ Interlude - Sasuke ~**

_"Itachi!" he screamed, feeling as if every moment of anger and rage he had endured since that horrible night were pouring out of his throat and threatening to set the air aflame. _

_The murderer didn't even bother to look in his direction._

_He shot forward, the Chidori in his hand crackling wildly. His blood sang in anticipation, each step bringing him closer to avenging his family, his parents, and finally ending the nightmare that had been his life since-_

_Itachi's hand drifted out from beneath his cloak, moving with the inevitability of an avalanche tumbling down a mountain side, and latched onto his wrist. A slight tug pulled him off balance, and he tipped forward, his hand plunging into the side of the building and triggering the release of the Chidori. The stored energy of the technique lashed out uselessly as it carved a gouge out of the wall. The murderer's hand squeezed like a vice, grinding the bones in his wrist together painfully, but Sasuke shoved it aside to focus all of his attention on the murderer himself._

_Itachi finally turned to look at him, the pattern in his eyes not the three tomoe of a fully matured Sharingan but instead a strange shuriken shape._

_They stared at each other in silence for a few moments. The murderer's face had the same blank, disinterested expression it always did. Sasuke used to think that it was amazing how his brother always looked calm and in control no matter the situation._

_Now it just reminded him of the night his world fell apart._

_"You, little brother," the murderer said, his voice bland and monotone, "are not yet worth my time."_

_The scene warped, and he was no longer standing on the side of a building, but instead in the middle of the street in a deserted, bloodstained district._

_"Why?" he screamed, sobbing. "Why?"_

_"... when you have the same eyes as I do... come to me."_

"Itachi!" Sasuke roared. He drew himself up, ready to lash out with all of his power, only to find the world tilting under him. His flailed wildly for a moment before his foot caught the bottom of the table, jostling the books and scrolls that covered its surface. He teetered for a moment, the chair he was sitting in almost tipping over before he regained his balance.

The chair settled back onto the floor with a dull thump, and he spent a moment gathering himself as he shook off the remnants of his nightmare. He'd been having that nightmare nearly every night lately, but despite how often he saw it it never failed to get his heart pounding and his hands shaking. Of course, his recent research probably wasn't helping in that regard...

He stood up, twisting and turning as he worked the kinks out of his stiff muscles. After getting a particularly loud and satisfying pop out of his spine, he shook himself and began cleaning up the books scattered on top of the desk.

He had delved deep into the Uchiha Library, pulling out the oldest and most secret journals and scrolls as he sought to understand the secrets of the Mangekyou Sharingan. All of the references were heavily veiled and hidden deep in metaphor. Many spoke of "the terrible price", "the cursed power", or "the blessings of the gods," but it was the sole reference to the "power that set brother against brother" that had haunted his nightmares.

There was no doubt that Itachi wanted him to acquire the Mangekyou Sharingan, just as he himself apparently had, but _why_? What did that bastard have to gain from giving him more power? Or was that too one of the many secrets the "ultimate form" of the Sharingan held?

Glancing over at the clock, he noted it was already morning and let out a small grunt of annoyance. He would prefer to keep researching, but his team - _his_, he repeated mentally, the sense of satisfaction at that still fresh and warm - was going out on another mission today and he wasn't about to miss a chance to gain more experience - literally, in this case.

He let a small grin grow on his face as he considered the situation he and the others found themselves in. Despite the many absurdities - not least of which was the fact that _Naruto_ of all people was somehow in a position of authority - he honestly couldn't say it was a bad thing overall. He enjoyed the freedom of his new rank and no longer being under Kakashi's direct command, of course, but the best part was the chance to literally measure his progress as he grew stronger.

He felt a small burst of joy every time a "level up" occurred and he savored the moment he tested himself and found he had grown noticeably stronger. The ability to compare his own skills and growth to those of the others was also very useful, though seeing the fact that a small girl several years younger and barely half his size was over _twice _as skilled in taijutsu laid out in plain numbers was still galling.

And _Lee_ was just...

Only Naruto didn't have some skill where he was better. Not that Sasuke had actually found out exactly what Naruto's skills were - the blond had managed to avoid listing his own skills and abilities when Sasuke was present, but he was certain that Naruto wouldn't have missed an opportunity to rub that sort of thing in his face the first moment he could. Since he hadn't, he was obviously embarrassed about just how bad his skills actually were.

And as fun as putting the idiot in his place might have been in the past, he had to admit that Naruto was making progress in leaps and bounds now. He'd had who knows how long by himself in this mess... alone... with no one to help...

He shook off his thoughts, grimacing. No, he had to admit that Naruto wasn't really the _dobe _any longer, not that he'd ever say that out loud. Not that it stopped Naruto from being the single most annoying person he'd ever met, either. He'd just managed to apply his own particular brand of annoying and stubborn and make something reliably useful out of it.

Sasuke even found himself looking forward to his discussions with Shikamaru about ways to utilize their abilities and skills to the utmost. He never would have thought that the lazy slacker who slept through most of their Academy classes would be as sharp or as observant as he had shown himself to be.

It was galling at times to realize that the Nara was actually smarter than he was, but also comforting in an odd way. He didn't feel like it was up to him and only him to come up with all the answers and watch everyone's backs constantly when Shika was around. They could bounce ideas off of each other, find the holes in each others plans, even discuss some of the more unusual applications of the skills they'd picked up in the Academy. If Sakura, on paper the most intelligent student in the Academy, had showed even _half _the effectiveness of Shikamaru, then- but no, she'd rather spend her time _trying _to impress him rather than doing anything that actually _would _impress him.

His grin grew wider as he thought about the brief errand he would be taking care of before meeting his team for their next mission. If he had learned anything from Shikamaru so far, it was the benefits of playing the long game. Sakura wanted to impress him. Sakura was obsessed with becoming his "ideal" girl, never mind that even _he_ didn't know what his ideal girl would be. Sakura, even though she never bothered to show it, _was _intelligent.

And he? He needed someone to start gaining skill in genjutsu.

~ Scene Break ~

"... and Kakashi-sensei has been teaching me all kinds of tricks he's picked up over the years! He says that I'm doing great, and is even talking about letting me take the lead on our next mission!" She faltered for a moment, her beaming smile fading slightly. "I mean, only if you guys aren't back by then. It's been a while since our team took a mission together, and seeing you around the village just isn't the same."

Her hands clasped behind her back and her head lowered bashfully.

Sasuke suppressed his annoyance reflexively. _Years _of experience with exactly this sort of behavior - from Sakura, from Ino, and from far too many others who thought he was "cool" or "mysterious" and refused to do the one thing he actually wanted and _leave him alone_ - meant he could have said her next words along with her.

"I've really missed seeing you lately. Maybe... do you think we could go get lunch or something? There's this great restaurant that opened up over at-"

"I've got a mission to get to," he interrupted her, barely remembering to soften the harshness of his tone. He made a show of looking over at the clock displayed in a nearby window, adding, "Actually, I should probably be heading out now."

"O-oh, ok," she replied, the disappointment clear on her face.

"I'll see you when we get back," he told her, nodding and beginning to turn away. He paused, then, looking thoughtful before looking back at her.

"Could you do me a favor, though?" he asked.

She immediately perked up and smiled brightly. "Of course! What do you need?"

"I've been doing a little research into genjutsu. It's one of the few arts that the Uchiha don't have extensive records on, and I've come across some conflicting information. Do you remember Kurenai Yuuhi? The instructor for the team that Shino, Kiba, and Hinata are on?"

Sakura nodded, her expression souring slightly.

"Apparently she's widely regarded as a master of genjutsu techniques, one of the best in the village, if not _the _best. It's an amazing feat, especially given how young she is and how difficult genjutsu can be."

Her expression soured further.

"I had a list of questions I was going to ask her," he said, pulling a small scroll out of his pocket, "but then this mission came up. Do you think you could find her and get the answers for me?"

Sakura was wearing the expression she usually had just before she and Ino got into yet another of their ridiculous fights. She didn't answer immediately, instead glaring into the distance. Suddenly, her face brightened and she smiled widely at him as she plucked the scroll from his hand.

"I'll make sure you get your answers, Sasuke-kun! Just leave it to me!"

He gave her a small smile.

"Thanks, Sakura. I knew I could count on you."

~ Scene Break ~

Sasuke paused outside the hospital room, listening. He could hear the surprisingly girlish giggle that meant Hanabi was genuinely amused at something along with another girl's boisterous laugh.

"And, and the look on his face was just..." Hanabi gasped out before falling into another fit. The other girl continued laughing as well, and the sound of their mixed laughter brought a small grin to his face.

"You're so lucky," the other girl said as they both got themselves under control. "I wish I could graduate early. Without you around it's going to be boring as hell."

"Hey! Luck had nothing to do with it!" Hanabi interrupted indignantly.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Still, I bet you pushed to graduate 'cause you're scared to face me again," the voice said teasingly.

Even out in the hallway, Sasuke could feel the uncomfortable silence that descended on the room.

"Hey," the voice continued softly. "I didn't mean it like that. I know it was an accident."

"I- I just..." Hanabi's voice was small and faint, and he had to strain to pick it out.

Sasuke knocked sharply on the door as he stepped into view. Hanabi was seated in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs next to the occupied bed, wearing what passed for informal attire among the Hyuuga clan - an aggressively clean white robe, perfectly tailored and worn with every fold and crease precisely formed. She was rubbing at her eyes as she looked up, startled. He frowned slightly when he noticed her eyes were watering.

The other girl was sitting cross-legged on the bed, both of her hands wrapped around one of Hanabi's as she leaned over. She had slightly curly light brown hair that hung down to her shoulders. She was dressed in a short-sleeved light blue shirt and had thrown back the covers to reveal bare feet and shorts that came down to her knees. Her comforting expression shifted into surprise and confusion as she looked up at him.

"Yeah?" the girl asked, her eyes narrowing as if trying to place him.

"I'm here for Hanabi," Sasuke said, nodding in her direction.

Hanabi drew in a deep breath, standing up and releasing the other girl's hand as she recovered her composure. "Is it time already?"

"Yeah, just need to pick up Tenten before we head out."

"Oh! You must be the chuunin on Hanabi-chan's team!" the other girl said, grinning and waving at him. "I'm Ayane!"

"Good to meet you," Sasuke nodded. "I'm-"

"Sasuke, right? Hanabi's been telling me all about you!"

Sasuke eyed Hanabi warily. Given his experience with Sakura and the other girls at the Academy, he really hoped she hadn't developed a-

"Hey! Did Hanabi really run circles around you when you were sparring?"

His jaw clenched and he felt his eye beginning to twitch. His frustration only grew when he realized that what Ayane was talking about was _technically_ true. Her and that ridiculous Fleet of Foot ability...

"That's not- there were special circumstances-"

"You mean she _did_?" Ayane crowed, falling back onto the bed and clutching at her gut as laughter bubbled out of her mouth. "Oh man, that's awesome! I thought she was just making that up!"

He glared at Hanabi, who just smirked back at him with her arms crossed. There was no sign of her previous discomfort in that smug expression.

"Oh! Does that mean that thing where she beat you five to none happened too?" Ayane pressed.

Hanabi's grin grew wider as she cocked her head slightly, daring him to deny it.

"We're going to be late for our mission," he ground out, turning on his heel and stalking out of the room.

Ayane fought to get her laughter under control as she exchanged farewells with Hanabi. "I should be out of here by the time you get back," she said, excitement clear in her voice. "You have _got _to show me some of the stuff you've been learning!"

"Of course," Hanabi replied. "I'll see you as soon as I get back."

"Awesome! Later, Hanabi-chan! Later, Slowsuke!"

Sasuke froze, then let out a low growl of annoyance before stomping away down the hallway, Hanabi's giggles and Ayane's laughter following him.

~ Scene Break ~

"You know," Tenten called out, startling Sasuke and Hanabi into halting just as they stepped foot into the training ground, "this isn't quite what I expected when I agreed to this 'experimental training group'."

Hanabi let out a small, amused scoff, nodding her head in agreement. Sasuke remained silent, curious as to where Tenten was going with this as he activated his Sharingan and studied her movements.

"I figured I'd squeeze in another hour or two of training and sparring, something useful, something to push my limits without killing myself trying to keep up with Lee and Gai-sensei."

Tenten paused for a moment, standing on one leg with her other foot drawn up flat against her thigh, the long blade she held in her hand rock steady as she pointed it at some imaginary foe. She let out a slow breath then flowed across the ground, her blade sweeping in slow, elegant arcs. A flick of her wrist and a quick pivot of her feet followed by a lunge had the blade quivering in the air nearly ten feet from where it had been a moment before. She held the position for several seconds before drawing her foot back and coming to a rest in another guarding stance.

"I even figured," she continued, her breathing still calm and even, "that I would get some experience fighting against other combat styles. Neji and Lee are both focused on taijutsu, so I don't get a lot of exposure to ninjutsu and even less to genjutsu in my normal training."

Sasuke and Hanabi continued to watch silently as Tenten danced across the field in a series of rapid, flowing moments that had her blade humming through the air. Her tempo built, faster and faster until it was difficult to see the blade at all.

"And then I find out what I've _really _gotten myself into."

She whirled suddenly, her arm whipping out and sending the long, thin blade spinning end over end to embed itself point first into the middle of a target halfway across the clearing. A rapid series of thunks followed moments later as kunai stabbed into the target and formed a perfect circle around the quivering sword.

"Did you know," Tenten growled, stalking towards them with a fierce expression on her face, "that aside from the civilians who have somehow gotten mixed up in all of this, that I'm the _oldest _person in our group? I'm fourteen! I shouldn't be the _oldest _anything!" she yelled, throwing her hands up in the air as she drew to a stop next to them.

"So?" Hanabi asked, crossing her arms. "I"m the youngest and you don't see me complaining about it!"

"It doesn't bother you that we're apparently _directly _responsible for the fate of Konoha when Lee and I are the most experienced members of the group and we have less than two years in the field?"

"Should it?" Sasuke challenged her, frowning. "Kakashi was already a jounin by this point, and the Third was two years from becoming Hokage. If anything, we're _behind_."

"You are, maybe," Hanabi added smugly. "I'm two missions away from making chuunin before I turn nine."

"So that's the plan? We just keep taking missions and racking up skill points and whatever else turns up until... what? Until Naruto dies again and we start all over?" Tenten threw her hands in the air again. "I can't even believe I just said that!"

"Yes, that's the plan," Sasuke said fiercely. "Every mission I take, every level I gain makes me that much stronger, gives me that much more power at my disposal. I'll keep doing this as long as it takes until I can _kill that man_. After that? I'll worry about that later."

Tenten paused, focusing her attention on Sasuke. "I'm not going to stop you, Sasuke. The reason I even wanted to be a ninja in the first place was because robbers killed my mom while she was traveling with a merchant caravan when I was just a kid. I know the ones who actually did it probably died in a ditch somewhere long ago, but that doesn't stop me from enjoying the bandit clearing missions that little bit more.

"It's not exactly the same, I know, but I _do _get where you're coming from," she continued, looking him in the eye. After a moment, he nodded quickly and looked away. "Even so, what are we actually going to do about Konoha as a whole? It's fine for Shikamaru to get everybody focused on the same short-term goals, but I get the feeling there's something a lot bigger coming our way. What are we going to do about that?"

Sasuke remained silent for a moment, and even Hanabi grew more solemn as she recognized how seriously Tenten was taking this.

"One of the first lessons Father ever taught me as heiress," Hanabi said quietly, not looking directly at either Sasuke or Tenten, "is that there's always another threat waiting in the wings. No matter how safe you think you are, no matter how secure in your power, you must _never _grow complacent. The moment you lower your guard, your enemies will strike hard and fast and without remorse.

"Peace is an opportunity to prepare for the next threat to arrive, and it is the responsibility of all ninja to use that opportunity to the fullest," she finished, her voice making it clear she was quoting her father's words verbatim.

Sasuke studied her for a moment, then let out a low grunt as he turned back to Tenten. "If you're right - and I get the feeling that you are," he admitted, "then how is gaining strength going to hurt us? Whatever else we do to prepare, the stronger we are, the more likely we are to win."

Tenten nodded slowly, looking back and forth between Hanabi and Sasuke.

"You have a point there," she said after a moment. "Gai-sensei wouldn't put it exactly like that, but he would approve of growing stronger to protect the village and yourself." She fell silent for a moment, then looked up with a sour expression. "Are we sure we can't recruit him? Or any of the teachers? Or Tsunade-sama?"

Sasuke shook his head immediately. "Naruto's tried several times, but something always happens and it's like they just forget everything he's told them. We'll keep trying, but for now it's all on us."

"Great," Tenten huffed, crossing her arms. She shook her head after a moment and clapped her hands to her face rapidly before settling into a determined expression.

"Alright, Mr. Chuunin," she declared, fixing her gaze on Sasuke, "how are we going to grow stronger and prepare for whatever is coming?"

Sasuke smirked, glancing over at Hanabi. "Take as many missions as we can as fast as we can. I figure with the three of us on the same team we can do _at least _as many as Naruto and Shikamaru's teams combined."

Tenten groaned. "_Please _tell me you aren't going to make this a contest?"

"You do know," Hanabi pointed out to Tenten, "that the experience point stuff we get for completing missions is shared by everybody, right? So the more missions Naruto and Shika's teams finish, the faster we get stronger, too."

Sasuke nodded, his smirk growing. "And with Naruto and Lee on the same team, there's no way they won't do everything they can to complete more missions than we do. And while Shikamaru can be lazy, he's also very efficient when he puts his mind to it."

"I swear," Tenten said seriously, "if you so much as _mention _flames of youth I will turn you into a pincushion." Sasuke let out a small snort while Hanabi just grinned. "Still, I can see that working... and after being on a team with Gai and Lee for so long, it would feel strange _not _to be pushing that hard..."

She nodded sharply then grinned at them, her expression fierce. "Let's go kick some ass."

[Part II - Journeyman - Start]

~ End Chapter ~

**A/N: As always, thanks for reading and thanks for all the reviews!**

**Many thanks to the folks on the SB forums for providing feedback and criticism!  
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**With the conclusion of Part I, Ramen Days will be on hiatus until a solid chunk of Part II has been written. I will be working on other projects (including finishing The Empty Cage and an original project which will be my highest priority) as well, so it will be half a year minimum before the first chapter of Part II will be posted.**


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